Chapter 12

CHAPTER 12

“ I made a shocking discovery today,” Noelle said to Cooper as they sat in the drawing room before dinner. They had chosen a corner slightly away from the rest of the party, primarily so Cooper could nurse his injuries privately.

He hadn’t even told Noelle how many bruises had started to form, particularly over his ass and elbows.

It was not a pretty sight – even for a man who was no stranger to pain. In fact, he had lived off of it for a time.

“And just what was that?” he asked, ready for her to tell him she had lost any form of attraction to him whatsoever after seeing his incompetency on skates.

But, of course, that would suggest that she had been attracted to him from the start, which was not what this impending marriage was based upon.

“You, Cooper, have a sweet tooth. A very hungry one.”

He laughed at that, for truer words had never been spoken. He wasn’t sure how many cups of chocolate he had drank nor how many pastries he had eaten, which had been sitting on the tray served with the chocolate.

“It was one of the better cups of chocolate that I have had the pleasure of drinking, I will say that,” he admitted. “I didn’t see you declining a second helping either.”

“I did not,” she said with a sigh. “I also have a propensity for sweets. Just imagine what our children would be like.” She stopped suddenly, her jaw snapping shut as she placed a hand over her mouth. “I shouldn’t have said that,” she said, shaking her head. “I only meant?—”

“I know,” he said, waving away her words. “It’s fine.”

It was fine. And yet, actually considering a future with her was fine as well. It was quite the conundrum, this fake engagement of theirs, which had become less of a business contract and more like an actual betrothal every day they spent together.

That was why she had included that clause of hers in the contract.

She was proving to be as smart as he was and likely should have been in charge of her family’s business interests instead of her father.

She was quiet, then, her gaze on the wall of books behind him and her fingers moving against one another in a gesture that was becoming familiar. After watching her stitch the heart ornaments together, he guessed that her hands were usually occupied with a needle and thread, although she couldn’t precisely carry them around here at the house party.

“A shilling for your thoughts,” he teased, nudging her shoe with the toe of his boot. That caused a smile to glimmer momentarily on her face, even if it was rather sad.

“I’m afraid my thoughts are not worth nearly that much,” she said forlornly.

“I disagree, and I am known to be a successful businessman,” he said, reaching into his pocket and finding a coin before flipping it toward her. “Here you are. Now, a deal is a deal.”

“I never agreed to this one.”

“Humor me.”

“Very well,” she said shyly. “I was just thinking of my mother. What would she say about this entire situation? What would she want to do here at this house party? And, mostly, I’m just thinking about how much I miss her.”

“I can understand that,” he said, reaching out and covering her knee with his hand, noting how it fit completely overtop of it. One benefit of their arrangement was that a bit of chaste touch would not be questioned – it was even expected. “I wish I could bring her back for you, but that is beyond my ability. Is there anything that would make you feel closer to her?”

“There is a song she loved that I sometimes play,” Noelle said shyly. “But I am not particularly adept on the piano.”

“But you can play?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Why don’t you play now?” he gestured across the room where the pianoforte sat, but she was already shaking her head.

“Oh, no, I couldn’t. No one wants to listen to my playing. Others here are much more inclined.”

“I am sure they would still love to hear you play.”

“I agree,” came Lord Walters’ voice.

Neither of them had noticed Noelle’s father joining them, but he took the chair next to the sofa now, his smile warm as he leaned in toward Noelle.

“You play beautifully, Noelle, and Lady Burton always loves music at her house parties.”

Looking from one man to the other, she finally sighed and relented.

“Very well,” she said, pushing away from the sofa and striding toward the pianoforte. She may have resisted at first, but Cooper loved that once this woman decided on something, she gave her everything to it.

Like their fake engagement.

She sat at the piano, her fingers hovering over the keys, before taking a visible breath and beginning to play.

Cooper recognized the song, one which was popular at Christmas, of course. Her fingers danced over the keys more slowly than the usual tempo of the tune, but she was accomplished enough that he could sit back and enjoy it. He watched her with hooded eyes, taken aback by just how tempting she was, the candlelight glinting off her auburn hair, her entire body moving with abandon.

He looked around the room and realized he was not the only one captivated. Most guests had stopped to watch and listen, while a few men had undisguised temptation written on their faces.

There was only one thing to be done about that.

He stood from his place, hobbling across the room toward her. Her face lifted when she saw him lean against the piano beside her, and he winked at her before opening his mouth and providing words to the notes she was playing.

They looked up and saw a star

Shining in the East beyond them far,

And to the earth it gave great light,

And so it continued both day and night.

Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel,

Born is the King of Israel!

Their gazes caught and held, and for the next verse, she gave him a quick nod before joining her voice with his. Her voice might not have been perfect, but it was warm and throaty and caused desire to radiate through his entire body. Their voices melded perfectly together, creating one of those moments that sent tingles down his spine at just how right and perfect the blending was.

As they sang the final chorus of “Noels,” he knew what he was singing, but somehow, along the way, it had become an ode to her, a joyous rendition of her name over and over.

As he stared at her, he realized the truth of the matter. They hadn’t known one another long or well, but any moment he wasn’t with her, he was looking forward to the next time he would see her. He was inclined to share his thoughts with her, whereas usually, he kept nearly everything to himself – even to the point of only ever telling his brother what was necessary.

It could be because of this secret he and Noelle had together, but he’d had many business dealings with other people in the past, secret agreements and confidential information shared.

Nothing had ever been like this.

And he guessed nothing ever would be again.

When the last notes trailed from Noelle’s fingers, she found herself frozen in place, caught by the intensity of Cooper’s stare.

He had not struck her as a man who would have enjoyed singing in front of a group of people, yet he had done so unabashedly.

For her.

What could it possibly mean? When she stared up at him, his navy blue eyes seemed to stare right through her soul, reading her every thought and emotion.

She had forgotten everyone else was watching them until a slow clap resounded from across the room. She broke their gaze as they both looked to the source of the sound, finding Lord Rochester had started the clap, soon to be joined by Lord Andrew. Within seconds, the rest of the guests were echoing the applause.

Her cheeks had flushed with heat when she stood, placing her hand in Cooper’s outstretched one. Noelle didn’t mind the attention, but between her piano playing and being caught in such an intimate moment with Cooper, even she was overwhelmed.

As he led her around the piano stool, Hattie gasped so loudly that a few people’s heads turned toward her.

“The mistletoe!” she exclaimed, pointing above them. Noelle stopped, her body knowing what that meant before her mind could catch up.

“Oh, we shouldn’t,” Noelle said, waving her hand. She couldn’t say that the idea of kissing Cooper caused her great chagrin, but she wasn’t sure about kissing him in front of the guests.

It didn’t seem like they would have much choice, however, as everyone began to cheer and chant their names, urging them closer to one another.

“Kiss! Kiss!” came a few calls, and Cooper met her stare, his lips turned up at the corners. He looked up at what was indeed mistletoe strung above them—mistletoe that she had forgotten to look for—and shrugged, ready to give in to the pressure around them.

He reached his arm forward, curling his fingers around her elbow, slowly drawing her toward him, giving her plenty of time to back away. He stepped closer to her, leaning in, his face just inches from hers.

“This all right?” he asked softly, and she nodded.

Perhaps he would prefer not to kiss in front of everyone. But after this, no one could argue their connection. She lifted her face to his, closing her eyes as he softly pressed his lips against hers.

She knew that the kiss wouldn’t go far. Not here, not with everyone looking on. But no one else knew how all of her soul seemed to be melting into him, floating through the air along with their kiss where their lips were joined.

Her lips slightly parted, and if they were alone, she knew she would have welcomed him in and deepened this to a point that would have been difficult to break away from.

He was backing away from her sooner than she would have liked, and the moment his lips left hers, she already missed him, wishing there had been more.

More that could be hers in the future if she was willing to revise their contract and allow for physical affection.

But that would only bring them closer together, and closer was the last thing they should be – for it would only hurt all the more when he left her after this time together once he had received everything he needed from her.

He led her through the applause to a seat in the corner. It wasn’t until they sat down that Noelle realized just how hard she was clutching his arm, and she hated that she was literally leaning on him to help her through a trivial occasion.

She had to be used to depending on herself, not on him.

She would have to resign herself to the fact that after this time with him she would have to marry whoever was willing to have her. At this point, her prospects would be low, but maybe with his contributions to paying off her father’s debts, her father would at least be able to afford a small dowry. Perhaps she would have to find a vicar or someone similar who had enough respectability to see to her needs.

Noelle would rather be alone at this point, but she had enough wherewithal to realize she had no way to support herself unless she became a seamstress, the only skill with which she had proficiency. But even that would come with its difficulties.

As the thoughts ran through her mind, she knew she was only distracting herself from the truth.

That it wasn’t her station in life that would be the saddest part of all of this.

It was that she would lose Cooper.

She had always loved Christmas and was saddened when it was over and the cold winter set in.

This year was no different – but it would only be all the worse when she had to say goodbye to the one man who truly saw her.

In the meantime, she would have to choose between distancing herself from him so that it hurt less when this was over or live in the moment and make the most of all the time they had together.

She looked over at him, catching his eye as he stared at her as though reading her mind.

He reached down, placing a warm hand on her leg.

And she desperately wished that he would never let go.