25. Liam

When I was a little boy, I had what most people would think was a normal life. My mom made breakfast and Dad and I sat at the table. Then he”d go off to work and she”d take care of me and the house. I suppose today, that might seem sexist, but the point is, my childhood was traditional. And it was happy.

When I was about six, my mother died. I was told she”d been sick, although I don’t remember that part. A few years later, my father died, and that was when I first learned about the world we lived in. At eight years old, I discovered my father was murdered by a rival at “work” which I learned involved criminal activities. It was then I heard rumors that my mother was poisoned. My safe, happy childhood was taken away by rival Bratva members.

My uncle was very young at the time, but he took me in and raised me like a son. At a young age, I was groomed to be strong and lethal. It’s probably why I became friends with Niko, as his life wasn’t so different from mine.

A few years later, my uncle married and had his sons, Robbie and Artyom, but I was still the heir apparent.

I can”t pinpoint the moment I decided I didn”t want that title. The closest I can get to one is when I found a stash of pictures of me with my mother and father during those happy, innocent early years. I remember a warm, loving home. That”s what I wanted in my life.

I’m not sure why this memory is popping up except that as I see Kate sitting at the table waiting for brunch, her stomach round with our child, I have a sense of calm. For this moment, life feels perfect. Everything I”ve ever wanted is right here, right now.

Moments ago, she asked if we needed to leave, and my first thought had been to find a way that we could stay in this hideaway forever.

But there”s no room for pipe dreams in my world. Surviving, with fleeting moments of happiness, like now, is the best that I can hope for. And when this is all over and Kate and the baby are living safely and happily away from all this, the only thing that will bring me any satisfaction in life will be knowing they are alive and well. I meant what I said to her earlier. The only goodness in this world right now, the only thing for me to fight for right now, is for her and our child.

I set her omelet in front of her and take a seat with mine across from her.

She inhales. ”Smells delicious. Are you as good in the kitchen as you are in the bedroom?”

I look up, surprised by her question. When the meaning sinks in, or at least, my take on the meaning, everything inside me lights up with erotic energy. ”Well, I can take these plates off the table, and you can find out right now.”

She laughs, and I’m mesmerized by the beauty of it. ”I meant cooking.”

”I knew what you meant. But I think it”s safe to say my bedroom skills are not limited to just the bedroom. If you”d ever like to find out.” The only reason I haven’t cleared the plates yet is that she’s pregnant and I’m sure the baby needs nourishment.

I watch her and realize that I’m seeing the woman I’d met nearly a year ago. She”d been afraid but had retained her sense of humor. There”d been an effervescence about her, and the idea of it being gone because of the circumstances in her life that brought her into contact with the brutal Bratva and Mafia felt like the biggest crime in the world.

But that part of her isn’t gone. She sits across from me flirting, bantering, and my dick is already as hard as a rock. It’s still pulsing from the memory of her lips wrapped around it. Fucking hell, she’s got a fantastic mouth. Thinking of that means there”s no stopping the fantasy of fucking her on this table. And then, I want to pack up, use contacts I trust, and whisk her away somewhere where we can hide and live a quiet, happy life. If only that dream could become a reality.

But I know better than anyone that it can”t. If I leave, there”s no doubt that Dimitri Babichev will take over. The Bratva is worldwide, and I have no doubt he”d reach out to them for help in finding us. Again, I’m reminded that Kate and the baby’s happiness and safety happen without me in their lives.

So, all I have is this one little slice of time where I can be the man I want to be for her. Where I can soak up her goodness and have a piece of her in my heart to keep for the rest of my days.

I push away the danger, the blood thirst I have to rip Babichev into a million pieces, so I can focus on her.

”What are you thinking about?”

Shit. Fuck. Hell. Once again, I”m letting the darkness of my life pull me away from this amazing woman.

I reach out and take her hand. ”Wondering how sturdy this table is.”

There’s a flash of heat in her eyes telling me she likes the idea of my fucking her here.

“You’ll need sustenance, though,” I say. “Eat up, Buttercup.”

Her smile is both sweet and sexy as she takes a bite of her omelet. “It is delicious.”

“Not as delicious as you. I plan to have you for dessert.”

Her cheeks flush a lovely shade of pink. “You’re making it difficult to concentrate.”

“Sorry.”

She shakes her head. “No you’re not.”

I shrug. “Maybe a little.”

We eat in silence, me watching her like a lovesick puppy.

After a few bites, she looks down into her eggs, her expression dropping slightly. “What will happen to my store?”

Fuck. I don’t want to go into all that. I want to pretend we’re two normal people enjoying each other.

“I don’t have a manager or employee to run it while I’m gone,” she finishes.

“We’ll get you back home and to your business.”

She nods, but I can see she isn’t so sure I’ll be successful. I’m not so sure myself.

“What made you buy the store?” I ask, hoping it will pull her from her melancholy.

“You know I like to read.”

“I do. I thought you liked the editing work.”

“I did, but I didn’t have time or interest in pleasure reading. When I saw the little shop for sale, I thought it would be perfect.” She smiles at me. “Thank you, by the way.”

“For what?”

“For the money.”

“It’s the least I could do after what you’ve been through. Fucking hell, Kate?—”

She puts her hand over mine. “It’s not your fault.”

I squeeze her hand. “I would do anything to go back and make it so you didn’t have to endure any of this.”

Her eyes narrow with heat ,and I wonder what I’ve said wrong. “Don’t say that.” Her hand goes over her belly. “I don’t like what happened, what is happening, but I’m here with you and I have this life…”

I wait, but she doesn’t finish.

“I didn’t mean to offend you.”

“I don’t wish that you’d never fucked me or implanted the baby.” She tosses my words back to me.

I feel like shit. My words are so vulgar. “I’m sorry. I just… I know you don’t want all this. You didn’t want to leave the home you created to be stuck with me again.”

She inhales her breath. “This time, it hasn’t been so bad to be stuck with you. And you promised dessert.”

How does she do that? Go from irked to flirty in a nanosecond? I do my best to keep up. “I think I said I want dessert.”

She arches a brow.

“I’m going to feast on that sweet pussy of yours.” To hell with brunch.

“Promises, promises.”

I stand up and take our plates. I toss them in the sink, not caring whether they break. When I return to the table, I haul her out of her chair.

“I keep my promises.” I kiss her hard and thoroughly until we’re both breathless. My hands tug at her clothes, wanting her fully naked before I put her on the table and taste every delectable inch of her.

Her hands slide under my shirt. “I want you naked.”

“You first.” I pull her pants down, along with her panties. I take a moment to soak her in. Her lean legs and round hips and belly. Full tits, with pink nipples sitting like cherries. Her long, auburn hair draped around her shoulders. Lovely eyes filled with desire. She’s like a painting come to life.

“You’re still dressed,” she says.

“I’m hungry.” I hoist her up until she’s sitting on the table, and I drop to my knees. I push her knees open and take in the glistening auburn curls guarding her pussy. If I lived to be a hundred, I’d never get enough of this woman.

I dive in without any preamble. I lick and suck and nip.

“Oh, God… Liam.” Her fingers grip my head as she writhes, her pussy getting wetter and wetter.

“Come, Kate… come and let me drink you up.”

I use my tongue, thrusting it inside her slick walls. My thumb flicks over her clit, again and again. Her hips gyrate, her breath comes in gasps, and then she’s there. Her body goes taut. Her legs wrap around me like a vise. Her pussy squeezes around my tongue and then releases her juices. I drink it up like a man dying of thirst. I kiss my way up her body until I reach her mouth, kissing her deeply, wanting her to taste herself.

Her hands go to my pants, freeing my dick.

“I need you,” she says, still winded from her orgasm.

I hook my finger under her chin to make her look at me. “Need what?”

“You.”

“What from me? Say the words, Kate. Tell me you want me to fuck you.”

A low moan emits from her. “Fuck me, Liam.”

Holy fucking hell. My dick twitches, ready to release its load. I position myself at her pussy.

“Say it again.”

Her fingers hold on to my arms as if she knows this is going to be a wild ride. “Fuck me.”

I drive in, and the moment I’m deep, something inside snaps. I’m lost in the wonder of her. I piston in and out, in and out, over and over, deeper and faster… more, more, more. I’m mad with need. My dick is so hard, so tight, I can hardly see straight.

“Liam… Oh… OH!” Another orgasm rocks her body. The minute her pussy clamps down on my cock, I’m shot to the stratosphere. I rock, thrust, and grind, releasing what has to be a record amount of cum.

Slowly, the haze evaporates. I’m left feeling wrecked, physically and emotionally. And I’m pissed. Why would the universe make me love a woman I couldn’t have?

I lift my head, wondering what it is about her. Her sated smile is so sweet, and my heart breaks even more.

“How was dessert?”

Her comment breaks through my torment. I laugh. “Delicious.”

I don’t have long with this woman. A few days, tops. Instead of lamenting the end, I’m going to savor the moment. In whatever time we have, I’m going to give her every part of me. I’m going to spoil and pamper her.

I pick her up and carry her into the bathroom where a freestanding tub sits.

”What are you doing?”

”I”m going to draw you a bath, and you can put all those smelly soaps in and relax.”

She looks at me with humor in her eyes, and it”s the most beautiful thing I”ve ever seen. ”You”re not going to join me?”

I glance at the tub, considering my large frame. I imagine we can fit. I suspect that”s the point of the tub.

She smirks. ”What”s wrong, big guy? You too macho to do bubbles?”

I can”t get enough of this side of her.

”It”ll be fun,” she finishes.

I don”t know much about romance. I”ve never bought flowers or jewelry or taken a bath with a woman. But this feels like something that would be romantic, and while it does feel a little bit unmacho, I strip my clothes and turn on the faucet.

Moments later, we’re in the tub with her sitting between my legs, leaning against my back. I feel like I”ve gone to heaven. I take the soap and suds it up in my hands and then run them over her body, down her arms, and to her belly. I gently caress her roundness, feeling a slight movement under my hands.

Her hands immediately go over mine, holding them still. For a minute, I think I’ve done something wrong.

“The baby is moving.”

I wait, feel… and then it comes again. Fucking hell. That’s my child. Tears come to my eyes. How could someone like me create a life, especially with a woman like Kate?

She tilts her head back to look at me, and I take the opportunity to fuse my lips to hers, searing this moment in my brain forever.

We sit in the tub not saying anything, and yet, there’s so much going on between us. It”s only when she shivers from a chill that I recognize the water is gone tepid. I get out, wrapping her in a towel and then in a robe.

After we get dressed, it”s the afternoon, and I feel like I should check in with work, but I don”t. Instead, Kate pulls out board games and we sit down to play. She’s very good at them, and I’m happy our child will be raised by a woman who knows how to play.

Later that evening, we make dinner and sit in front of the TV to watch a movie. I don”t know what it is because to be honest, I”m not paying attention to it. All of my attention is on Kate.

When she yawns, I take her to bed, and as much as I want to make love to her again, I know she needs her rest. It can”t be easy to live the life she”s having to live and be pregnant.

I climb into bed with her, spooning my body around hers, cocooning us into this private little world. I savor it for as long as I can until sleep overtakes me.

I don”t know how long I’m asleep when she says my name.

My eyes snap open and I go on alert. ”What’s wrong?”

She pushes me back and snuggles up close to me. ”There”s nothing wrong. Well, not really.”

My brain is finally starting to function. It”s the middle of the night, and Kate and I are in bed. ”What do you mean?”

Her fingers walk across my chest in a flirtatious way. ”The doctor told me there”d come a time in my pregnancy when my hormones were going wild.”

I stare at her because I have no idea what she”s saying.

”Liam.” She laughs at me. ”It means I”m horny.”

It takes a minute for the words to sink in, but then I smile. ”I can help you with that.”

”That”s what I was hoping for.”

This time, when I sink inside her, I watch her, taking in every sigh, every moan of my name. I think of our child growing inside her. A child who will have all the love it will need from her. I bury my face in her neck as the pain of not being there for them tears my heart.

Later, Kate falls asleep in my arms again. My heart cracks open that this can’t be my life. I finally understand Niko”s behavior when he fell for Elena. And Donovan”s when he fell for Lucy. Why did they get to be so lucky that the women they loved wanted to be with them? To live in the same world as them, even with all the risks and danger?

For a moment, I imagine Kate making the same choice, choosing me. But I push it away. My world is no place for a woman like her. The truth is, even if she were to tell me she wanted to be with me, there”s no way I could allow it. She and the baby deserve so much more, so much better, so much safer.

As I fall asleep, I wonder if losing Kate is punishment for my choices. Everything I’d done had been to protect her, but in doing so, I made it so I couldn’t have her.