Chapter Fifteen

Priest

I couldn't concentrate.

Every time I tried to think, all I saw was the hurt in her eyes. The pain I'd put there. I never wanted to hurt her again. I thought by closing that chapter of our lives, she would find some semblance of peace

That she would be happy—relieved even—to have it all over with.

If anyone deserved to be happy, it was her.

"Shaw?"

Looking up from the bottle of whiskey in my hands, I spotted Stevie standing in the doorway. Placing the half-empty bottle on the table, I wiped my hands down my face and stood. "Yeah."

"We need to talk."

"About what?"

"My daughter. Your wife."

Taking a deep breath, I groaned. "Who told you?"

"It doesn't matter. Now sit your ass down because you are about to have a come-to-Jesus moment."

"You don't believe in Jesus."

"No, but I do," Father Dominic said, walking in after her. It had been years since I'd seen the man. At one time, he was my trusted confidant. The one person who understood my fears, worries, the family I tried so hard to distance myself from.

His guidance got me through a lot of hard times.

"What the hell is this? An intervention?"

"Sit the hell down, son," Woody growled, as he was the next person to enter the pool house.

When I refused to move, the one person who I never expected to see walked in, glaring at me. "You heard your father-in-law. Sit your ass down, Priest."

"What the hell are you doing here, Savage?" I asked as Jessica's husband took a seat.

"Making sure you don't fuck up anything more than you already have."

Taking a seat, I looked up just as one more person walked in, closing the door behind him. He said absolutely nothing as he looked around the room, before focusing his ice-cold blue eyes on me.

"Bullseye."

"Priest."

Clearing her throat, Stevie sat crossed legged on the floor, getting everyone's attention. "Now, while I'm not sure why Savage and Bullseye are here, King informed me they could help. So, let's get down to business."

"You fucked up, son," Woody blurted out.

"Damn it, Woody!" Stevie grumbled. "We agreed to not place blame."

"Not placing anything. Just stating fact, woman. He made my baby girl cry."

Father Dominic sighed. "I see you two haven't changed one bit."

"Shut up, Dom," Stevie griped.

Holding up my hand to stop them. I looked at Stevie and asked, "How do you know Father Dominic?"

Stevie rolled her eyes and groaned. "He's my big brother."

Nodding, I smirked. "Well, that explains the hostility. I imagine the holidays are fun at your house."

"Like I'd ever invite him," Stevie muttered as Father Dominic shook his head.

"Anyway!" Savage interjected loudly. "King asked me and Bullseye to come talk some sense into your thick head. So, you want to tell us why we're here and not in bed with our wives?"

Sitting back, I simply said, "I'm setting Phoebe free."

"She ain't a wild animal, Priest. She's your wife," Savage stated.

"She won't agree to it, Shaw," Stevie affirmed. "I know my daughter. She will fight you on this."

"She can't. Virginia has a no contest rule."

"Why are you doing this now?" Father Dominic asked, sitting forward. "I married you two. You both took vows before God. I know you, Shaw. You wouldn't just do this without a good reason."

"It's time. She's been hurt enough."

"You mean, you've hurt her enough," Bullseye spoke up. "You may be able to lie to them, but you can't to me. There is a look death leaves behind. It never goes away. Tell them so they understand."

"It's not their business," I growled.

"Tell them or I will," Father Dominic ordered firmly. "I may be a man of the cloth, but Phoebe is my niece first. Always has been and always will be. She came to me after you left her at the hospital and told me everything."

"Hospital?" Stevie gasped, looking at Woody.

"When was my daughter in the hospital?" Woody demanded.

"Tell them, Shaw."

Knowing none of them would leave until I told them everything, I spoke my truth. Through it all, no one said a word, letting me speak at my own pace. It had been so long since I'd talked about that time, and while I know I glossed over some of the finer details, the effect was still the same. Because when I was done, Stevie was openly crying, and Woody sat in shock as he just stared at me.

"So, now you know. It's time I set her free."

"You do that and you might as well put her in the coffin yourself," Woody whispered. The pain of losing his grandchild, and almost his daughter was evident in his eyes. "Phoebe isn't like my other girls, Shaw. She's my dreamer. Her whole life, she's known, believed that there was someone special in this universe for her. That the universe created this one person for her and her alone. She waited, prayed, read the tarot cards religiously, looking for anything to give her a hint when she would meet him."

"Woody is right, Shaw." Stevie sniffed, wiping her eyes. "Phoebe was never supposed to go to NYC. She was all set to attend UCLA, but at the last minute, she changed her mind. She said the cards told her she would meet her soulmate in the Big Apple. While we tried to change her mind, it was already made up. My daughter has been waiting for you since she was a little girl. You walk away from her now, after everything you've both been through, you will destroy her."

"I don't know any other way. I refuse to hurt her anymore."

"That's not your choice, Shaw." Father Dominic sighed. "God only gives you what you can handle. I know you don't want to hear this, but God put you on this path for a reason."

"REALLY!" I shouted. "How dare you fucking say that to me? You have no idea what I've been going through. The pain I feel every fucking day because I couldn't protect them. My wife. My beautiful wife had our son ripped from her body. That motherfucker cut her open and took him from us. My wife almost died! And when she didn't, I had to be the one to tell her that she could never carry life in her body again!"

Father Dominic remained silent for the longest time, before he started to speak. "I wasn't always a priest, Shaw. I was married before I entered the seminary. My wife was pregnant with our daughter. She was on the way home from the grocery store when two men robbed and killed my wife and daughter for five bucks and a stick of gum. My wife was eight months pregnant, Shaw. So don't tell me I don't know how you feel. There isn't a day I don't think about them. Pray to God that when my time comes, they are waiting for me. I could have drunk and whored my time away. Hell, I could have put a bullet in my head and ended the pain I was feeling. Instead, I turned to God. I leaned on him, prayed that he would get me through it all. Now, I help others."

Savage leaned forward and said, "You know my story, but what you don't know. What no one knows is that after Shane was born, Jess got pregnant again. She was four months along and we were going in for the first ultrasound. That's when we learned there was no heartbeat. That night, the doctor induced Jessica. I had to stand by and watch while my wife went through labor for a baby we were never going to take home. When she finally delivered, I didn't know what to expect. But when the doctor handed me my daughter, I'd never seen a more beautiful little girl in my life. She was perfect, Priest. Absolutely perfect. I miss her every day. I would give anything to have her with me, but I know she's in heaven with my sister Kitty. The pain of losing a child will never go away, brother. I don't have to tell you that. All you can do is find happiness where you can. You only have one life on this earth. Don't waste it by throwing it away."

Bullseye stood by the window, looking out, when he started to speak. "I don't have any pearls of wisdom for you, Priest. I lost my first wife because I trusted someone I shouldn't have. As for my current wife, I found her in the bowels of Hell. I went in after her, knowing I wouldn't come out. But I went anyway, killing everyone in my path to get to her. When all was said and done, those sick fucks destroyed her. There was nothing the doctors could do. To save her life, they had to take everything away from her. Like Phoebe, Lena will never carry our child. But you know something," he said, turning to look at me. "I would rather spend the rest of my life with her than spend one second without her. It's a cold dark world, Priest. You know that better than most. Don't let your wife slip through your fingers because you can't let go of the past. It's done. You can't change it, but, brother, you can change the future."

Hanging my head, tears streamed down my face. "I don't know how."

Before I knew it, Stevie was up, wrapping her arms around me as I cried for the first time since that night.

"Oh God, I miss him so much."

Two days later...

"What the hell do you mean you haven't seen her?" I glared at Ares, who huffed in annoyance.

Fucking figures.

The second I get the nerve to apologize and ask my stubborn wife to forgive me, she up and disappears.

"I'm not her babysitter, Shaw. She's a grown-ass woman. The last time I saw her was when she left to go see Father Dominic."

"That was five days ago, Ares," Stevie moaned dramatically, throwing her arms in the air.

"She could be anywhere." Woody sighed, shaking his head. "Stevie, call Athena. I'll call Freyja. Maybe they know where she's at."

Pacing back and forth in the main living room in Malpas House, I tried to get a grip on my rising emotions. Since the damn intervention, I'd been unable to stop the flood of emotions from overwhelming me, and the more agitated I got, the more worried I became.

"Maybe she went home to Rosewood?" Savage said, reclining in a chair eating a sandwich. "Did you call and check?"

"King hasn't seen her."

"What about friends that live in the city?" Bullseye asked, looking at his phone.

Shaking my head, I muttered, "Phoebe doesn't socialize much. She only has a few friends here, and one of them is Ares. The other is Robin, and she hasn't seen her since we arrived."

"Well, you've been married to the woman for ten years. Where would your wife go?" Bullseye asked pointedly, looking at me.

"We were only married for six months before shit happened. We've been living apart ever since."

Savage chuckled. "Liar. She's been living with you for the last year at the clubhouse. Jess told me she showed up at King's wedding reception and put a beat down on those club whores."

I smirked at that.

She sure as hell did.

My pacifist wife had a nasty right hook.

"Think, Priest. She is your wife. Where would she go?" Savage asked.

That was it.

I had no clue.