13. Isabella

"Oh, God,"I cry. His fingers work inside me, not penetrating deep but it's enough. His fingers are thick and calloused and sexy as sin. All of this is a sin.

His mouth on my breasts, suckling and teasing. His hard length pressed against me, begging for attention. And I want to give it to him. I want to please him, but he won't let me.

"Let go," he coaxes. "Call my name, Bella, let me know who's makin' you feel like this."

"Priest!" I go over the edge, my slickness coating him as he groans, watching me fall apart underneath him. I need him so badly. I need his body on top of me.

His mouth moves back to my nipple as I hang on for dear life, enjoying every single lick and suck as he pleases me. His fingers still play with me, but he stops pumping me. Holding himself off me with one hand planted on the mattress, I feel another orgasm building. He's going for gold and I'm loving every second of it.

"I want you," I whisper. "Priest, I want you inside me."

He moves his mouth to my neck, nibbling and sucking gently. "No, Bella."

"Why?"

His fingers brush over my sensitive clit, teasing me. "You know why."

Still, if he thinks that I'm going to let him get away with not feeling pleasure, he can think again. "Rub yourself against me, I know you want to."

He groans when I shift my hips, moving so his cock is no longer pressing against my thigh, but it's now flattened against my wet center.

"Fuck, Bella."

"Get yourself off. I can feel how hard it is."

I move my hips and he groans. His hips also move and all of a sudden, we're rubbing up against one another through our clothes.

His eyes close as he shifts, his hands planted against my head on the mattress as he pushes back and forth against my pussy, brushing my clit with his tip as I throw my head back. I'm coming again… this time it feels different. This time — against his hard dick — it feels so much better.

I watch as he unfolds, his eyes boring into mine while his face changes and I feel the wetness explode as he comes in his boxers. His eyes flutter shut as he stills and I revel in the fact I made him come. Holy heck.

The second we stop, panting from exertion, he pushes off the bed and rolls to sit with his back to me. I see him adjusting his cock as he mutters a string of curses under his breath.

"Priest that was…"

"Wrong," he finishes. "It was wrong, I'm sorry."

I sit up, pulling my breasts back under my tank. "Sorry? For what? For making me feel good? For making yourself feel good?"

He turns, his eyes tortured. "You didn't come here for this… I didn't bring you here to take advantage of you."

Oh, my God, he's serious! As if I'd ever think something like that.

"Priest, I'm the one who came in here last night. You had no intention of making the first move."

His eyes shift. "Don't be so sure about that."

My heart races in my chest as his admission. "What I meant was, I didn't come in here for this either. I got so scared. I've never liked the dark, and when I woke up in another strange place, I panicked."

"And then we spooned and cuddled and you woke up and I took what I wanted."

I frown. "You didn't take anything I didn't want you to take. In fact, I want you to take more."

He shakes his head. "I'm sorry, Bella. It can't be me. I don't deserve you. You need to hold out for the man you're goin' to marry. Just like you told me."

I laugh without humor. "Like Leo? The man who struck me because I wouldn"t give him what he wanted? I'd rather die all over again than give him my body. Not even if he was the last man on earth would I do that."

He looks distraught when I fire those words at him. His face softens. "I didn"t mean to bring all of that up."

"I know," I whisper. "But you also have to understand that I'm a woman who's never had any freedom before. For the first time in my life, I'm actually free, Priest. Being with you these last few days, it's been like a dream. I'm sorry if I'm coming on too strong, but I can't help that we have a connection. Do you feel it too?"

He turns away, and I know I have my answer.

"You do, don't you?"

He runs both hands over his face. "You just made me come in my pants like a fuckin' teenager, what do you think?"

I giggle.

He turns to look at me, a playful look on his face. "This isn't funny."

I wave my hands in the air. "Hey, you're the one who said it. If you need a hand cleaning up?"

"Cute." He pushes off the bed and wanders toward the bathroom as I check out his tight ass in those boxers.

I made Priest come. I made him break his vow of celibacy. That makes me feel like I have real power. That I mean something to him.

I flop back on the pillows.

So that's what an orgasm — or three — feels like when you're not doing it yourself? It feels so much better. Priest with his hands on my body… I know I can't get enough. I know that I need so much more from him. That I want to explore and let him touch me and do things to me that I've never let anyone do.

I hear him moving around in the bathroom and I snuggle into his pillows. His scent… it makes me feel like this place and this man I barely know is like home. It's dangerous. I know that I shouldn't get so attached, but I can't help it. I know that I can trust him. And after what we shared just now, I want to do everything in my power to have more of those moments with him.

To give myself to him fully.

There are definitely no regrets on my part. I only wish he hadn't stopped, because where Priest is concerned, he has discipline like I've never seen. Yet, I made him come undone. I made him lose himself, even if it was just rubbing up against me.

A big, shit-eating grin spreads across my face and I can't wipe it off. Nor would I want to. This feels magical, and I want to bask in it.

Later that day

"Are you sure?" Priest asks me.

I'm not sure, of course. Going to the clubhouse seems a little… out there. Plus, after everything I've been through, I can't say that it's the wisest idea. But this is something that Priest holds dear to him. The NOLA Rebels are part of his life, and I want to see how he behaves around the other bikers. Even if I am a little apprehensive, I know that it'll be an eye opener seeing him in his own environment, instead of the Soup Kitchen.

"I'm sure."

"Manny will be there, maybe Stella too."

I know I'll have to keep my baseball cap on as a disguise. I can't exactly dress up to the nines and start acting like I can really have a life here.

"Okay."

"In a couple of days we'll go to Texas. We can see Dan the day after…"

"Can we do something first?" I whisper.

"Of course, what is it?"

"Confession."

He stills, his back to me as I chow down some cereal. He turns, glancing my way as I smile sweetly. "Are you serious?"

"Yes. I mean, it'll make me feel better… about what we did."

He stops and takes a deep breath. "It won't be happenin' again."

"Way to make a girl feel special," I mutter.

He's next to me before I can blink, his fingers lifting my chin so I'm forced to look at him. "It's not that and you know it. You know I'm supposed to be cleansing. Sex complicates things, which is why I stopped for a while."

I have a mischievous edge to my voice when I say, "Maybe you should start up again?"

His lips twitch. "Wise ass."

"Seriously, Priest. I mean, I don't know much about sex but it seems pretty basic. This could be a good thing for both of us."

"Can we just eat breakfast without talkin' about sex?"

"Why? Is it doing things to you?"

Amusement crosses his face as his eyes crinkle, trying not to smile. "You know what you do to me, so let's knock it off before I really change my mind. Then you won't sit down for a week."

My cheeks heat as he lets go of me. My mouth is dry as he turns to put the breakfast things away and my eyes dip to his ass in those jeans. My goodness he's gorgeous.

Seeing him half naked this morning and having his dick pressing against me in all the right places has only made my little crush on him a little more like an obsession.

This man is not only sweet, but the most generous, beautiful creature I've ever met.

He's a biker and a bit of a badass, but he helps people in need, abstains from sex like he really is a priest, and didn't even use me to get off like most men would have. I encouraged it, and yet he still refused to fuck me. Him coming like that in his boxers was the hottest thing I've ever seen. Something about him hanging onto his last bit of restraint has me feeling things that I never thought possible. I want this man to not only take me, but destroy me for any other man. I don't care that this is more one-sided and I'm more into him than he is me — none of that matters.

Imade him feel that way.

I'm the one who held the power and made him come undone.

Mine is the name he cursed when he lost control, and that's what I'm holding onto.

"I'm not afraid," I say out of nowhere. "Of the clubhouse, I mean. I'm not a delicate little flower, Priest. I can hold my own."

He turns to look at me. "I know that. You're strong, Bella. I just never want to make you uncomfortable."

"But you have business there?"

"Yes, and there'll be a party of some sort goin' on. I have to talk to my prez."

"About me?"

His eyes soften. "Yes. And about Rueben. I checked around today and nobody's seen him. Delores said she thinks he was stayin' at some refuge downtown, but they said he comes and goes."

I'd almost forgotten about that asshole. "Well, I'm sure he'll show up sooner or later. More's the pity."

He's deadly serious when he says. "He's goin' to pay for what he did to you, Bella. Do you understand that I keep my promises?"

"I don't want you to kill him."

He frowns. "I didn't say that."

"But you will hurt him?"

"Yes. It might make him remember his manners, though I highly doubt it."

"Is this what you do in the club?"

"No. That's normally Tag and Harlem, my club brothers who keep everythin' in order, and trust me, if those guys get involved, Rueben won't be just walkin' with a limp, he'll be pickin' out his own coffin."

I shudder at the thought, knowing that he's a creep and deserves a fate that means he won't get to hurt anyone else ever again. I wonder how many women he's done this to that don't have a voice?

When Priest offers his hand, I take it. He has his motorcycle jacket on; it has his name on a dirty patch on the front, and his club skull emblem with NOLA REBELS MC on the back. He looks different with it on. More badass than usual. Covering up his tattoos except the ones creeping up his neck.

"Is this how your club deals with men like him?"

He snorts. "He's not a man. He's a scumbag for pickin' on a woman. And my club takes out the trash. Despite what you might think, they're good guys."

"Are you sure you want me to come with you?" I want him to say the words. That he wants me there. Even though this is the riskiest, most stupid thing I could possibly do.

"Only if you want to. I have business to deal with and I don't want to leave you alone."

I cast my eyes downward. "Are we going to talk about what happened this morning?" My cheeks flush when I think about what took place between us and how good it felt.

"We did talk. You asked me if I felt the same connection you do, and we all know how that ended."

He doesn't even look embarrassed about what he did in his boxers. The man came in his pants. Why is that so freaking hot?

"Okay."

"And I shouldn't have done that," he adds. My disappointment must show on my face because he frowns, lifting my chin until my eyes reach his. "Not because you aren't beautiful, Bella, but because I'm here to help you. I never brought you here to fuck you… or to get into your panties. I should have more resistance." His words. Oh my, his words. The idea that I make him come undone sparks a flame inside me low in my belly.

"I know that," I say. "I also didn't come into your room expecting anything." The fear of his rejection is proving too much and I know I'm in way too deep. I shouldn't be feeling this way for a man who is out of my league in every way. Now he rolls with a motorcycle club to boot. I sure know how to pick ‘em.

"Hey." His voice is velvety smooth. "I know that's not what happened. My position of power though, means that you're vulnerable and…"

"Don't." My voice breaks. "Priest, I'm not going to fall for you. And I'm not some dainty little princess who will crack at the first sign of trouble."

His lips twitch. "I would never think that about you. You're strong. Resilient. Badass. All those things and more. But if we sleep together, then things change between us."

He thinks I"m a badass? I mean, I know I have lived through trauma in my life and gotten out the other end, but I've never really thought of myself as badass. I kinda like the idea.

I also don't want to sound whiny or needy, so I refrain from reminding him what I did to him without even touching his dick. Just rubbing. I clench my core… I feel that throb again deep inside me. The orgasms he gave me this morning were like nothing I've ever experienced from touching myself before. And I never let Leo touch me like that.

This was all for Priest.

"What does that matter? I'm not staying here forever," I remind him.

Amusement crosses his face. "You know what I think?"

I shake my head.

"I think you've been cooped up for a long time, Bella, with a controlling family and an arranged marriage at a young age. None of that can be easy on you," he goes on. "And I think deep down there is a firecracker inside you — no, a volcano — that's begging to be let out and just be free."

My jaw drops at his words.

It's like this man can seriously see into my soul. I've no idea what the hell to say to that.

"Maybe there is," I whisper. "Maybe all of this happened for a reason."

"I believe most things do."

He's still staring at me when I say, "Do you really believe there is a happy ending for people like me?"

"Why not?" he challenges. "Why wouldn't there be? You have the whole world at your feet. All isn't lost just because this happened to you. I'm here to help you, so is Dan, Stella too, and the other girls from the club. You'll like them."

I smile. "Okay. I want to come and meet them."

"Just stick with me, okay?"

"Why? Is there something I need to worry about?"

"No. But you're pretty and the guys will want to talk to you."

Wait… I'm pretty?

"And you wouldn't like that?"

"They only want one thing, Bella. As much as I love them and they're all my brothers and I know they'd catch a bullet for me; the truth is they're out for as much pussy as they can get, pardon my French. And you'd be just another notch on their bedposts."

Still. He doesn't want that for me.

Is that because he truly does care, or he wants me for himself? He could have taken me this morning if he'd wanted, and he didn't even take his boxers off. The man has some kind of reserve that I can't comprehend. I would've given myself to him. Despite me telling myself I would've stopped, I know that isn't true. I wanted so much more. Just the feel of his hands on me… and then his mouth.

"And you're not like them?"

His dark eyes find mine and I shudder as he pulls me by the hand toward the back door. "You know I'm not."

"But you're still a man."

"I think we've established that."

"What if I wanted more?"

He stops and turns to look down at me. The crease forming between his eyebrows deepens. Does he think I'm too needy? That I'm a clinger? Maybe I am, but I can't help it. Nobody has ever spoken to me like he has. I could only ever open up to my Nonna, and she's been gone for months now. I miss her terribly.

He pinches my chin with one hand. "One step at a time, okay?"

That's not a no.

A smile forms on my face. "Okay."

He may just be placating me because he thinks I'm too young, or too innocent, but Priest is going to work out sooner or later that he's accurate: I am a fireball that's been burning slowly for quite some time… and that volcano is ready to burst.