17. More Fun Cruise: Todd

This cruise was giving me so much more than I'd expected. And none of that had anything to do with the super fun we had on the giant water slide. It had more to do with the acceptance from Larry and the words "good boy" that came out of his mouth. When the cruise was over, maybe we could have a real relationship. Maybe this fake dating could be actual dating. I had been reluctant to get my hopes up, but my walls were crumbling by the snuggle. And we were getting plenty of those in.

Late that afternoon, the team pulled in all the inflatables and stowed them so we could get underway around dinner time. And while the fancy dinner where Jax and Ward announced their engagement had been fun, I was looking forward to something more casual. I wasn't disappointed. We had hamburgers, hot dogs, and special fries, which were fixed how you wanted them, with a bunch of crazy toppings to choose from, but I was a simple guy and went with the standard, melted cheddar cheese, chili and onions. Larry did some kind of weird truffle and parmesan thing. He let me taste it, and while it wasn't bad, it could never beat the classics.

My friends joined us, and we had craft beer with our food and plenty of laughing and congratulating Jax and Ward. For the first time since they'd started pairing off with their rich boyfriends—now fiancé—I felt comfortable with them again. The warm camaraderie we shared was back. To be honest, on their part, it never left. It had only been me and my insecurities mucking up the works, so sitting with Larry, I no longer felt left out with them. I was warm and happy like this was how it was supposed to be, effortless.

Finally, for that thirty-some-odd-minute dinner, I felt like I could be good enough for them. Good enough for Larry. It was everything.

Later, the tables were pushed back to allow room for dancing. If you could call it that. Anyone looking in on us would call it weird gyrating and hand movements set to music. But it was fun and carefree.

At some point, Jax grabbed my shoulders and pulled me to the side. "Hey," he said, leaning in to speak above the music. "Your blender drinks class was a hit!"

"Yeah? How do you know?"

Jax put his arm around my shoulders. "A lot of people were commenting on it. So…"

"So what?"

"Would you want to do it again?"

"Sure. It was fun. When?"

Jax bit his upper lip and looked at me sheepishly. "Well, tomorrow?"

I laughed. As if I would say no. "Of course. Just text me when and where and I'll be there."

"Thanks. I think people that didn't go to the first one will want to get in on it too this time."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. Hell, they might go to taste the drinks. But they'll stay because of you. Hands down, you're the best part."

That warm feeling in my chest grew. It was nice to do something fun, something that I was good at, for my friend who had done so much for me over the years. I missed having him as a roommate. Those days were gone, but I looked back fondly at them. I put my arm around his waist and hugged him. "No, the best part is being here and doing fun things with you guys. Thank you for having me."

"Any time, buddy."