7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Ethan

H er face is blank. She's silent. I've crossed a line. She's right. I have no right to be here. I know that she could have had her ass on the line if she tampered with anything at the bank, and Caleb had no right to ask her. But it still annoys me. I don't know which annoys me more; the fact that she's right or the fact that I'm wrong. I feel like a fool for sitting here, nose three times its normal size, yelling at her in her own house, for something that happened a year ago. "I'll take some ice if you have some." I say, feeling my nose throb, now that I've gotten what I wanted to get off my chest, out.

Freya rises and goes to her freezer, and as she does, I remember something that I haven't thought about in a long time.

"I love you." I chuckle, as she pulls a frozen strawberry shortcake out of the freezer. My face is alight as she sets the cake on the table, with the words, ‘Congrats, Ethan' written on it. I told her that I acquired a billion-dollar account after our date on Friday, and she refused to go to another fancy restaurant tonight, and now I know why. "God, you're so awesome."

"It's important to celebrate everything." She says with a smile, and I actually love her for not taking my earlier sentiment to heart. Most women would go all dramatic, making a big deal about it, but not Freya. "Hell, I celebrate each time I sell one of my software packages. Why do you think I have so many cupcakes in my freezer?"

"Is that what those are for." I comment, as she lifts the dome off the cake. "I just thought that you had really fast metabolism and a penchant for midnight snacking."

"Nope." She says, popping her ‘p'. "Now, we have to let this sit for a bit, or we can't cut into it."

I pull her to me. "Gosh, what will we do to burn the time?" I insinuate. I hadn't put the moves on her after our date Friday, wanting to avoid behaving like that's all that she means to me, but now, I want her so bad my cock is awake, just with her standing close to me, close enough that I can smell her shampoo.

"Did you get around to doing your laundry?" She asks, brow lifted.

I pull her into my lap. "As a matter of fact, no. But something tells me that you prefer it that way."

She bites her lip. "So, you're telling me that that cock of yours is free behind the zipper?"

My lips meet hers in a tender kiss, but I suck her bottom lip as she pulls back. "Free and awake."

As my hands slide up her shirt, her arms snake around my neck, and our tongues meet. I pull her shirt over her head, exposing her breasts. "And you're not wearing a bra, so we're even." I murmur, taking her nipple into my mouth, as she moans expressively. Lifting, with her against me, I take her to the bedroom again, kissing her erotically on the way, feeling my cock poke up out of the top of my pants. It takes ten seconds for us to tear off our clothes, and that's when Freya slides down to her knees, taking me in her mouth. I suck in air quickly, shocked that she's doing that, and as I watch her stuff me into her mouth, I rear my head back, panting quickly.

"Jesus, fuck, Freya." I breathe, as I feel the head hit the back of her throat. She artfully sucks the tip, sending me to the moon and back, making me feel things that I haven't felt in a long time, until my cock feels like it's going to explode, and I gently shove her off, wanting to bury myself deep inside her.

My pants are on the floor, and I grab the condom out of my wallet, before pushing her onto the bed, and sliding the condom under the pillow, kissing her lips erotically. Her wetness is at the head, as I slide it up and down her clit, knowing how she responds to that, and I thrust into her, watching her eyes spring open in shock. "Just for a minute, baby. I want to feel you raw."

"I made you that hot, did I." She murmurs against my lips, hungry for more.

Her walls are hot and wet, hungry against my cock, as I fill her deep, and we're both enjoying the rawness of it. It feels so fucking good like this, but I have to be careful. I thrust into her, slow and deep, as we both moan, taking it in, and I keep going, until I feel her clench. "Come for me, baby." I whisper to her, and she responds in kind, as I shut my eyes tight, holding on for dear life. As she finishes, I pull out quick, just in the nick of fucking time, and slide myself down her body, wanting to taste her, the way that she tasted me earlier.

Her wetness is still pulsing as I reach her clit, and I suck on it, making her cry out loud. My tongue finds every nook and cranny, as she writhes, at the edge already, and then I shove two fingers inside, setting her on fire. She comes gloriously against my fingers and tongue, as I ride her waves of pleasure, and then make my way back up her body, feeling under the pillow for the condom.

After I slide it on, I thrust into her, this time throwing caution to the wind, riding on the coattails of her orgasm. Her nails are digging into my back as I fuck her hard, harder than I have before, and she moves with me, feeling it, feeling my balls slap against her ass, feeling my cock get impossibly hard inside her, as my seed shoots to the tip, and I hit that spot inside her at the perfect moment, throwing us both over the edge together.

"God, Ethan!" She growls as she comes, and I plant my lips on hers, like a thank you for calling out my name at the perfect time. My kisses are erotic at first, responding to the burst of pleasure, and then they gradually become more and more tender, as the aftershocks ebb and then subside. "You are a fucking god in bed." She pants. The way she says it she might as well applaud.

I just chuckle, pulling myself out of her, going for modest. After I take care of the condom, I lay next to her, tucking my arm under my head. "So, do you think that cake is ready to eat?" I ask as more of a joke.

"Worked up an appetite, I see."

I lean in and kiss her lips. "Something like that."

Her green eyes are glowing she's so satiated. I could get lost in them. The way she looks at me is mesmerizing. And it's the same look in any situation. Not just after sex. I let myself believe, just for a moment, that what I said in the kitchen earlier, is true, imagining if I really did love Freya. And how my life would change. As she gazes at me warmly, combing her fingers through my hair, almost maternally, I can't help but kiss her more. I've learned that it's my new favorite thing to do. And I realize that it may be true. I think I love Freya. The thought, frankly, scares the shit out of me. She's not in any of my circles. Da's never met her. None of my family has met her, in fact. She's down to earth and smart and beautiful and fun. But she's not rich. She's not tied to the industry, and some may see that as a threat.

Stupidly, I try to think of reasons why we can't be together.

…and soon one will be slapped right down in my lap.

Freya wraps some ice in a dish towel and hands it to me. "How'd it happen?" She asks as I set it on my nose.

"Caleb."

"Ah." She sighs as she sits back down. "I should have known. That was a stupid question. Why else would you be so driven to come here and give me a piece of your mind unless something like that motivated you."

"Aye. I had it coming."

"Maybe you did. Maybe you didn't, Ethan." She licks her lips. I look away. I still can't look at her. "How were you to know that this was going to happen. It's not like you and Caleb are that close, like you said. To be fair, it wasn't any of his business, and I know that your family is not known for its transparency."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"How long we went out and you never once introduced me to anyone in your family."

"Aye. And thank God for that. How would you have escaped the lie then, Freya?" I point out.

"Ethan, you have to understand my position." She says levelly. "I was terrified. And you never gave me a chance to explain."

"There was no need, Freya. I knew all I wanted to know. You slept with my brother and kept it from me."

"Aye, but put yourself in my shoes, Ethan. What would you have done, hm? A beautiful, smart woman shows more than an interest in you, and suddenly you end up in bed together, and it's the best you've ever had. You tell yourself that that's all it is, that there's no need to tell her about you and her sister fucking around months before. You make a deal with yourself to tell her only if things turn serious. But then, when it does turn serious, you're so terrified of losing her that you still keep it to yourself."

"Time runs out, Freya. I know you're not a fool to believe that it would never come out."

"Aye. I knew it would. But I didn't think that you would react the way that you did, Ethan."

I slam my fist on the table. "How did you expect me to react, Freya?! Do you have any idea how humiliating that was? Caleb all but laughed at me. Danced in his shoes. It's like he tried you on before I did, and he knew how second-class you were, so it was no loss to him."

Her gaze darts to mine. "Caleb and I were nothing compared to you and I, Ethan, and you know it. You and I were in love. I should have known that I'd never be good enough for you. I should have seen the signs. You were terrified of commitment. You never introduced me to anyone. It was like I was your secret fuck, and that's all. Yet I loved you with every beat of my fucking heart." Her voice cracks and she looks away.

"I shouldn't have come." I lower the ice from my nose.

"You're right. You shouldn't have come. But you did. The least you can do is tell me how the bairn is."

"Well, you guessed it yourself, Freya. She's fine. Caleb and Laney found her."

"Did they get the kidnappers?" She asks with a sniff.

"One of them. But not the whole clan. That'll take some doing."

"Is it true. That Caleb and Laney are getting married?"

I nod. "Aye. They're expecting a bairn, too."

Her gaze darts to mine. "Then I don't understand what all the fuss is about still, Ethan. Your brother is set to marry. He's got a child and one on the way. It's all in the past. Why can't you just let it go?"

I'm not ready to answer that. The truth is she's the one that got away. She was always the one that got away. Sure, I've been with another lass or two since her, but none could compare. Freya is the only woman I've ever loved, and the part that bothers me the most, is that I wasn't afraid to tell her. But I can never get over the lie. No matter how just it was. No matter what excuses she gives me. No matter how much time has passed.

"God, Ethan." She wipes her eyes with her thumbs and sniffs. "Caleb and I were just fucking. That's the truth." She chuckles wetly, still crying. "He didn't even like it. He only ever called me when all the other lasses on his list weren't available." Another sniff. "That's part of the reason why I didn't tell you. It was fucking embarrassing. I was awful in bed with him. He knew it. I knew it. And you were in no rush to introduce me to your family, so, in my mind, it would never come to pass. As much as I loved you, I knew, deep down, that it would never amount to anything. I knew that what we had had an expiry date."

My jaw muscles are working. I can't bring myself to tell her the truth. That she and I could never have a future together, no matter if she lied to me or not. But something tells me that she already knows. Freya is no fool. If she was, I would have never let myself have the feelings I once had for her. It never would have happened. We would have just been another fuck, just like her and Caleb were. "I should go."

"You've said that already. Yet you're still here." She points out. "Give my best to Caleb." She says, changing the subject, after a beat. "When's the wedding?"

"Soon, but no date has been set yet. Laney wants to marry before the bairn starts to show. She wants to have them wed before the adoption papers are processed."

"That makes sense." She sniffs but gets a warm smile and a distant look on her face. "God, the papers will go nuts when he marries."

"Aye. The headlines are already littered with the news."

"Well, it's huge, Ethan. The two biggest investment companies in the world are marrying. It's something you'd only hear about in a fairytale. And Caleb settling down, God, I'm sure millions of women never thought they'd live to see the day."

I feel my jaw clench again. "You jealous, Freya?" I ask, always letting my tongue work before my brain. Letting that tiny fear that's lived inside my head all this time finally show its ugliness. "You wish it was you?"

"Ethan, I once told you that my sole mission in life is to be happy." She says, in a ‘level with me' voice. "If Caleb ever showed an ounce of true interest in me or I in him, we would have been miserable. There was no chemistry there, well, not much, anyway. You Harris's are a good-looking bunch, sure, but what's meant to be is meant to be, and we weren't." She pauses, and I allow myself to look at her for a second. "Nor were we, evidently." Freya reaches her hand to me and gives it a squeeze. "You need to let it go now, Ethan. All that anger inside you should have been long gone. I'm guessing you never met anyone after me."

"Neither have you." I point out, not caring if I sound cold or not.

"You're right." She chuckles mirthlessly. "I promised myself long ago that I'd love once, and if I got my heart broken, I'd never love again, and so far, I've kept that up." A sigh. "As for casual relationships, hell, I know where that led me, and that was my first attempt at it, too. Some things are not meant for some people. I learned that lesson the hard way." She rises and goes into her spare room. When she returns, she's got a teddy bear in her hand. "Here. Give this to the bairn." She hands it to me.

"What's this?" I ask, inspecting it. It's an old Care Bear, with a big rainbow on its belly, and a heart on top of the rainbow.

"It belonged to my aunt. She gave it to me when we moved to the states. I was terrified and she told me that the bear would protect me. I've kept it all these years in hopes to give it to some bairn in the same boat some day. After what that little lass has been through, a teddy bear with magical powers could be just the thing for her."

"I can't take this, Freya. You've had it for decades."

"So? What good is it doing collecting dust in my spare room?"

"It's got to have sentimental value, Freya. It belonged to your aunt."

"My aunt gave me many things. But most were lessons. She also taught me to give back when you can. That's why I make the software and all but give it away, that's why I give to charities, and that's why I give old stuffed teddy bears to little girls who are scared to death of moving to a new country. It's no mind to me, Ethan. Take it. You don't even have to tell her who it's from. Just as long as she gets it, that's all that matters to me."

I feel like a heel. Like a sack of shit. I look on the tag under the bear's rear. It has Freya's name written on it. "I took it to school. My mama labeled it so it wouldn't get lost. You can scratch it out if you're afraid Caleb might be upset."

I swallow. My heart sinks. Here, I've come to her house to chew her a new one, and she ends up giving me something special to her, to give to someone she's not even met. "Thank you. That's very sweet of you, Freya."

She purses her lips into a smile. "See. I'm not all bad."

I nod. "Aye. I never thought you were."

She looks at me. Her eyes are sparkling with emotion. "That's good to hear after all this time, Ethan."