Chapter 12

Rainey

My shoulders fellfrom my ears the second the door closed behind Zeke. He was off to a jobsite that he said couldn't wait another day. Daisy sat at my feet, her tongue just peeking from behind her teeth and her eyes staring at me as if she knew how awkward I'd been all morning and she wanted me to spill my guts to her.

"It's just because we don't know each other that well now," I said on a sigh, pushing around the last of the eggs on my plate that I couldn't eat. Zeke had tried to make breakfast for us again and I'd insisted on doing it instead. I couldn't let him wait on me hand and foot. I wasn't that kind of girl anymore.

Daisy whined.

"What? It has nothing to do with how hot he is now." She huffed out her wet nose. "You know what I'm talking about. Any female would take notice of that physique."

Just the thought of his bare chest, or the look in his deep blue eyes when I did something to make him smile, or even his thick hair that begged for my fingers to run through it…it all made my stomach flip-flop erratically. Perhaps I just needed an antacid and to get a life.

I pushed up from the table and took my plate to the sink. Daisy's nails scratched on the wood floor as she followed me. "I think I'm going to walk into town. Stretch my legs, get a coffee, get out of here." I looked around the house, seeing Zeke everywhere I looked. Yeah, that was what I needed. Some distance. Some time away from the vortex that was Zeke. It didn't take me long to get dressed and say goodbye to Daisy who tried giving me sad eyes.

"I can't take you all the way into town, Dais," I said scratching behind her ears. "I'd have to call Zeke and ask permission and then he'd rush over here to drive me so I didn't have to walk. And the man shouldn't lose out on a job just because I came into his life like a wrecking ball."

It was true. Zeke tended to drop everything where I was concerned. I'd only noticed it now, but looking back through our memories together, I saw that it was a pattern with him. It was…nice. But also disconcerting. No one had ever done that for me before and I wasn't sure what to make of it.

The weather was gorgeous outside with the sun already beating down through the pine trees as I walked. Some peace and quiet in nature broken by the occasional passing car gave me time to think, a luxury I didn't have when I was working two jobs and worried about making rent. I'd worked up a good sweat by the time I made it to the quaint little downtown of Blueball. The shops were brightly painted and flowers were liberally strewn everywhere one could put a pot. The lampposts lining the street were old fashioned but well kept, giving the town a Hallmark Channel vibe. I remembered that Christmastime was even more beautiful here.

"Rainette Shaw?" came a reedy voice from behind me just outside Crazy Beans, the local coffee shop.

I turned to find a little old lady in a pair of cotton capris and matching shirt who looked familiar. She was smiling at me like she knew me. "Yes, that's right."

She clapped her hands and then dug around in her purse before sliding on a pair of thick black-rimmed glasses. Aha! It was Mrs. Moore, one of my English teachers in high school. I saw those glasses in my nightmares a few times when studying for finals way back when.

"It is you!" Mrs. Moore grabbed my shoulders and pulled me in for a hug. When she pulled back, she gave me an up-and-down appraisal that didn't end in disapproval like it always did in high school. "Why, you've grown into a fine young woman, haven't you?"

I lifted a shoulder. "Haven't robbed a bank yet."

Mrs. Moore laughed, the lines deepening on her face. "Oh, Rainette. You were always one of my favorites."

If I'd gotten my coffee already, I would have dropped it. "What?"

Mrs. Moore's eyes sparkled behind those lenses of doom. "You heard me. I had to be hard on you to keep you in line back in high school, but I always admired your spirit. I was sad when you left town, which is why I'm so excited to hear you're back and married to our Zeke. He's a good man."

Her praise made my stomach flip-flop again. "He hasn't robbed a bank either."

Mrs. Moore laughed again, as if I was a damn comedian suddenly. I couldn't remember her so much as smiling, let alone laughing back in high school.

"That's true." She put her hand on my arm. "That man needed a wifey and it absolutely makes sense it's you." Then she was shuffling off down the sidewalk, those thick glasses shoved to the top of her fully gray head.

The guilt was back and this time it had an extra layer of hurt that had more to do with disappointing Zeke. This marriage of convenience was turning out to be anything but convenient.

I yanked on the coffee shop door harder than I should have. The open sign hanging from the top whacked loudly against the glass, warning of my entrance. Heads swiveled and I tried to paste on a calm smile. Perhaps I should get this coffee to go. Hiding out in Zeke's house was sounding better by the minute. Thankfully, there was no line to order and the guy behind the bar immediately popped his head up from where he was restocking something in the cabinets below the register.

The barista was wider than the doorway I'd just come through and the tattoos all over his exposed tan skin were simply an extra warning. Then he smiled and I felt more at ease.

"What can I get you?"

"How about a caramel latte, iced, please."

"You got it. Swipe there and I'll have it up at the counter in just a few minutes."

I barely got my credit card accepted on the little machine by the register when someone else called my name. Preparing myself for more uncomfortable lying to people I used to know, I made sure my expression wasn't screaming resting bitch face before I turned around.

Four ladies around my age were sitting at a nearby table. The blonde-haired one with shoulders I envied had her hand up, waving me over. Three of them had smiles, but the dark-headed one shot me a scowl that made me nervous.

"Hey," I said lamely, edging closer to their table.

"Rainey, right?" the blonde-haired one asked, not waiting for my confirmation. "I'm Paisley, this is Keva, Audrey, and Marlo."

I tried to remember their names while ignoring the lifted eyebrow from Marlo. "Hi. Sorry for my ignorance, but did we go to school together?"

Audrey, the shortest one, chimed in. "Kinda. We were a few years behind you."

"But we're friends of Zeke," Marlo piped in, her tone not exactly friendly.

"Ah."

Keva hissed something at Marlo I couldn't make out. Paisley ignored the hostile vibes from Marlo. "Want to sit with us?"

I looked over at the counter like a lifeline, but my drink wasn't ready yet. "Well, I was headed home, but I could sit while they make my drink."

Audrey was already up and dragging a chair over. I sat down, making sure I stayed closer to her and not Marlo who flanked my other side.

"Gotta say, we were pretty surprised to hear you two got married," Marlo said accusingly.

"Ignore her," Paisley said. "She's extremely loyal and she worries you'll eat up Zeke and spit him out again."

I nodded, understanding dawning. They were friends of Zeke. He must have told them how I left town. How I hadn't been there for him when his dad died. Suddenly I didn't blame Marlo for not trusting me.

"I understand. Zeke's a good guy."

"Oh, we know that, but do you know that?" Marlo snapped.

"Iced caramel latte," the barista announced, sliding the drink on our table and saving me from having to answer Marlo's question.

"Thanks, Lawson," Keva said for me when it's clear I couldn't find my voice. Not after it's so obvious that Marlo didn't like me.

"Any of you ladies looking for a part-time job?" Lawson, the barista, rubbed his hands together. "I need to hire someone as soon as possible."

"Sorry, I'm slammed with work at the clinic," Keva answered.

"Me too," Audrey piped in. "I finally have enough clients I don't have to cut coupons just to afford my weekly groceries."

I opened my mouth to say…something. I couldn't exactly tell them I wasn't staying. Marlo would probably pull out a knife or something. She looked like the type to actually cut a girl, not just threaten it. If I was staying, working at the little coffee shop would be perfect for me. For a quick second, yearning stabbed at my heart. If things were different, staying here in Blueball would be nice.

"Well, spread the word if you can." Lawson knocked his knuckles against the tabletop and then headed back behind the bar. But my eyes felt like they were going to fall right out of their sockets. He had one particular tattoo on his forearm that made my blood run cold.

"See? She can't give me one good reason."

Marlo's sharp voice pulled my thoughts back to the conversation. Paisley put her hand up and argued in my defense, right before all the ladies started talking at once.

The chair scraped loudly against the stamped concrete floor of the coffee shop as I stood up on weak legs.

"I gotta go," I managed to say, snatching my coffee off the table and hustling toward the door.

"See what you did?" I heard Keva admonish Marlo.

Then the door swung shut behind me and I turned right, heading back home as fast as my feet would carry me. By the time I made it to the street that led to Zeke's house, I'd walked off my panic. Pulling my phone from my back pocket, I called Grandma and asked if I could swing by tomorrow to pick up her copy of my father's will. I wanted a chance to read through it one last time before I met with the lawyer. I couldn't have another stipulation come out of the woodwork and prevent me from getting that money.

Tomorrow I'd turn thirty, and I'd be one step closer to independence.

One step closer to leaving my prior life behind.

"How'd the shorts work out for you?" Zeke asked, eyeing the fraying edges against my thighs that I'd hacked off last night. My eyes had nowhere to safely land. Not with him walking out of the bathroom without a shirt on again. Jesus. How was a girl supposed to sleep when she had an Adonis lying next to her?

"Good!" I lied.

Zeke cocked his head and studied me. "You're still hot. Here."

He walked over to the doorway of the bedroom and flipped a switch. The overhead fan turned on and kissed my skin with blessed coolness. He'd been so nice to me since he got home from work, but I'd had mostly one-word answers, turning the conversation into awkward silence. I wanted to talk to Zeke. I wanted to tell him everything that had happened since I left Blueball at eighteen, but confiding in him would only make it harder to leave. And I had to leave.

"Thanks," I answered sheepishly.

I had tank tops I could be wearing to bed, but for some reason I felt like these flannel pajamas were the last line of defense. Like if I took them off, there'd be nothing holding me back from climbing on top of my best friend turned husband and begging him to put his hands all over me. God, I was an idiot. I sounded like a bitch in heat, unable to control herself in the presence of a fine male.

Zeke walked up to me, the waistband of his shorts so low I spied that delectable ridge of muscles over his hip bones. I squeezed my eyes shut. If they were going to be traitors and insist on eye-fucking Zeke, then I'd simply close them anytime he was in the room.

His hands swept my hair back from my shoulders and I could feel the heat of him though no other part of us touched. Then his lips were on my forehead, gently placing a kiss there like I was something precious instead of a fucking weirdo with her eyes closed in sawed-off flannel pajamas, shivering at his touch in the middle of summer.

"'Night, Rain," he murmured, stepping back.

I nearly groaned out loud at the loss of his touch. "'Night," I croaked, running to the bathroom to use the scissors again to cut off the sleeves of my sleep shirt. Even a late-night sewing session would be better than climbing in that bed with Zeke and begging him to let me curl up in his arms and never let go.

With the bathroom door closed behind me, I blew out a slow breath, trying to calm my heartbeat. I needed to get my shit together. Today's run-in with Lawson at Crazy Beans had been a warning from the universe to not get too comfortable. There were bad people out there and blindly trusting a man seemed to be the lesson I needed to learn in this lifetime.

Message received, universe.

I waited until I thought Zeke might be asleep before creeping out of the bathroom and slipping under the sheets. I made sure I stayed on my side of the bed and not one wayward toe touched him. He might be my husband for another day or two, but touching him would be downright dangerous.

To my future.

And to my heart.