18. Isla

18

ISLA

“ A bout time you came to my humble abode.”

I can’t help but chuckle as Selene moves out of the way to let me into her apartment. Also, it’s not like she’s wrong.

In the time that I’ve been back home and enrolled at Crestwood, I haven’t had a chance to stop by Selene’s place on campus. Now that I’ve finally made it here, I’m struck by how much the place is … just her.

Video chatting hasn’t given me the full scope of her room that it deserves. Selene lives in a single dorm room in one of the older, yet recently renovated, buildings on campus. Although the space is small, she’s made it her own. The room is filled with a warm glow from the string of fairy lights draped across the walls, reminding me of how she decorated her childhood bedroom.

A twin bed is pushed against one wall, made and covered with what looks to be a soft quilt in shades of blue and green. There are a few clothes scattered on the bed, but it doesn’t look too messy. Near the window hangs a dreamcatcher gently swaying in the breeze from the air vent. There’s a small television resting on a TV stand on one part of the wall facing the bed. The other part has a small desk that is cluttered with textbooks, notebooks, and a laptop. My eye catches a framed photo of us at our high school graduation, and I can’t help but smile at the memory.

Despite the limited space, Selene has created a welcoming and comfortable environment for herself. Her room is a reflection of her, and it makes me wish I had a space on campus to do the same.

Technically, I do, but having to deal with Tessa makes me not even want to bother.

Selene plops down on her bed and pats the space beside her. “Come, sit. Tell me everything.”

I follow her lead and ask, “Where do I start?” I sigh, leaning back against the wall.

“From the beginning. Duh.”

I tell her about the conversation Asher and I had, where things ended up, and what happened at the volunteering site. However, I save the best for last.

“But that’s not all.”

I try to make the thoughts in my head make sense enough so I can voice them out loud. Never mind. It’s time to rip the Band-Aid off. “Well, I took your advice.”

Selene stares at me for several seconds, as if she has no idea what I’m talking about. Then, the realization hits. “YOU. DID. WHAT?”

All I can do is nod and bite my lip.

“THAT’S ALL YOU’RE GOING TO SAY?”

“Selene, stop yelling.”

She looks around as if she doesn’t realize she’s doing it. “Oops. When I suggested it, I didn’t expect you to actually do it. You usually blow me off.”

“Well... he blew me off in my childhood bathroom. During the team bonding thing at my house.”

“I’m so... proud of you. Was it worth it?”

I roll my eyes at her praise. I’ve already proved that I suck at lying, so here goes nothing. “It was fantastic. The only issue is that our playtime session didn’t result in me not wanting him anymore. I didn’t fuck him out of my system.”

“This is such a?—”

“A mind fuck? Yep, that’s pretty much the way I would describe it,” I finish for her. “It’s surreal, and I can’t believe I did it. However, I have no regrets, so there’s that.”

“Have you talked to him since?”

I shake my head. “Nope. I’ve seen him at the rink this week, but haven’t spoken to him. Mostly because I’ve been running from him every chance I get. What’s funny about all of this is that he said he wants to try and rebuild some sort of professional relationship, given that I now work for the hockey team, and we’ll be seeing each other frequently. And look what I did. Made things more complicated, apparently.”

“And how do you feel about all of it now?”

I let out a humorless laugh. “Honestly? I don’t know. It’s a hot mess, and a large part of me wants to avoid him like my life depends on it.”

“Yes, but you work for the hockey team.”

I sigh. “Yes, Captain Obvious, I know. And it is a dream gig for me. You know I did something similar at NYU, and I wanted to continue it here…to help me feel like everything is returning to normal.”

“True, and you shouldn’t have to give that up just because of Asher,” Selene says. “This is your chance to do what you love on your own terms.”

I nod slowly because she’s right. But it’s easier said than done. “I know, I know. It’s just... hard. Being around him again stirs up all these old feelings. Feelings I thought I’d buried a long time ago. Between being in love with him and growing to hate him, it’s just hard. As was he when we did what we did in my bathroom.”

That makes Selene burst out laughing, and it takes her a second to catch her breath and be serious again. “That’s understandable. It’s difficult facing your past, especially when it’s wrapped up in someone you used to love who betrayed you. I remember how crushed you were when he took you out on that date, only to tell you he didn’t think things would work out.”

And here come the painful memories that I tried so hard to forget. Selene was there for me almost immediately after, when I called to let her know what Asher had said to me. She’d been there to wipe away the tears that hadn’t stopped flowing, no matter how hard I tried, because I’d had my heart broken for the first time in my life. She was also there when I declared that there was no way in hell I was going to Crestwood University because he was going to be there.

“I remember it like it was yesterday,” I say, rubbing my index finger across my lips. “How he looked at me after we enjoyed your standard dinner and a movie was so cold. His words made me question whether I was hallucinating or not. I truly thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with him, and then he just... ended it. Just like that.” I punctuate the end of my sentence with a snap of my fingers.

“And yet, you didn’t let him break you.”

“Oh, he broke me. I just didn’t let him keep me from putting myself back together.”

Selene smiles at me. “And that’s what matters most. You picked yourself up, dusted yourself off, and kept moving forward. It wasn’t easy, but you did it. And now, here you are, back at Crestwood, ready to chase your dream and get drunk.”

This time, my laughter is genuine. “I don’t know about the drinking part, but thanks. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“Probably be an even bigger hot mess,” she teases, nudging me with her elbow. “But I’m proud of you for handling this situation with much more grace than most people would.”

“I don’t know about that,” I say, shaking my head. “I still feel like I’m barely keeping it together sometimes.”

“Who doesn’t feel that way?”

“Good point.”

Selene reaches over and grabs her phone. “Enough talking about Asher for now. Let’s focus on more important matters, like what we’re going to eat tonight. My treat.”

“We can just go to one of the dining halls.”

She glares at me, but I can see she doesn’t mean it. “I already said I was treating you, and I don’t want to leave my room, so…” Her voice trails off as she looks down at her phone again.

I can’t help but grin at her. “You always know how to cheer me up.”

“It’s a gift,” she says with a wink. “Now, what are you in the mood for? Chinese? Pizza? Thai?”

I pretend to think about the options. “Hmm, I could go for some greasy, cheesy goodness right about now.”

“Pizza it is!” Selene says and hands me her phone. You pick the toppings, and I’ll place the order.”

“Okay, I’m thinking pepperoni, sausage, and extra cheese,” I say, handing the phone back to Selene. “With a side of garlic bread, because why not?”

Selene taps the screen to finalize our order. She then walks over to her desk and grabs her laptop. “Now, while we wait, why don’t we watch a movie? The Princess Bride or 10 Things I Hate About You ?”

“You know me so well. Let’s go with 10 Things I Hate About You . I could use a good dose of ’90s rom-com magic right about now.”

“Excellent. Let me hook this up so we can watch it on the bigger screen.”

As the opening credits of 10 Things I Hate About You start to roll, I lean back against Selene’s pillows. There are a million things I should be doing right now related to school, but I’m not. This is what I needed after the emotional rollercoaster of a week—some quality time with my best friend, getting ready to eat some comfort food, and watching a movie.

About thirty-five minutes into the movie, our food order arrives, and after Selene walks back into her room with it, my stomach growls at the sight.

The aroma of melted cheese and garlic fills the room as Selene sets the pizza box down on the bed between us. She hands me a paper plate and a can of soda before settling back into her spot. I let her grab a slice first since she bought it, but once she’s done, I dig in and almost moan when I take my first bite. The combination of cheese, pepperoni, and sausage is heavenly. While I might regret it later, depending on how my body reacts, it’s the least of my concerns right now.

“Mmm, this is exactly what I needed,” I mumble with a mouthful of pizza. My manners have flown out the window, apparently.

Selene laughs at my lack of decorum. “Same, and I didn’t realize it until it got here. I’m glad you went through emotional turmoil for us to get this.”

I swallow my bite and stick my tongue out at her playfully. “You’re an asshole.”

“Clearly,” she says with a smirk.

As we watch the movie and continue enjoying our food, we fall into a most comfortable silence. The only noises that can be heard are our eating, drinking, or the sounds of the movie we’re watching.

Once the ending credits roll, I stretch my arms above my head, the movement almost causing what’s left of my soda to fall over. I snatch the can from its resting place on the bed and make Selene laugh in the process.

“Nice save,” Selene comments, still chuckling at my fumbling attempt to prevent a spill. “Can’t have you ruining my precious quilt now, can we?”

I roll my eyes. “I wouldn’t dream of it.”

“Well, I appreciate you looking out for my stuff.” Selene stretches her body too, then hops off the bed to clean up our empty plates and napkins.

As Selene tidies up, I find myself lost in thought, drifting back to my meeting with Asher. Ending the day with Selene sort of cancels out those feelings, leaving me feeling drained yet content.

“Earth to Isla,” Selene says, waving a hand in front of my face.

I blink, snapping out of wherever my mind traveled to. “Yeah, sorry. Just... thinking.”

Selene nods, understanding in her eyes. “It’s been a hell of a day for you. I get it.”

“That’s an understatement,” I mutter, flipping my ponytail over my shoulder. “But thanks for being here for me. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

She grins, plopping back down on the bed beside me. “I stand by what I said earlier. You’ll probably be a hot mess. But seriously, I’ve got your back. Always.”

I lean my head on her shoulder. “I know. And I’ve got yours.”

We sit like that for a moment before Selene breaks the silence. “So what’s your game plan for dealing with Asher? Sure, the conversation was a good start, and you lit the house on fire by letting him eat you out, but what now?”

I sigh, lifting my head from her shoulder. “I know, and I’ll just have to take it one day at a time. We should probably talk at some point, but for now, I’m going to keep it professional. I can’t let him get under my skin again.”

Which sounds hilarious because he’s already there.

“Damn right. You’re stronger than that. And if he tries anything you don’t like, I’ll kick his ass myself.”

I can’t help but laugh at the image of Selene taking on Asher. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

“You better.” Selene glances at her phone, checking the time. “It’s getting late. Are you staying here tonight or heading back to your place?”

I consider taking Selene up on her offer. The thought of returning to my dorm room doesn’t give me warm fuzzy feelings, but there’s a chance that Tessa will either be out or asleep.

“I’ll stay here. I don’t want to cut our hangout, now slumber party, short.”

Selene claps her hands together and says, “That’s my girl! Now let’s get back to talking about everything Asher did to you, because I want more details.”