22. Turren

Asharp cry awoke me, and I looked down at my mate, seeing the same concern mirrored in her eyes.

“What’s . . .?” Her eyes widened when the hoarse sound echoed around us once more. “Brunnen.”

Fear roared through me, and I sprung up with her in my arms. I held her as I leaped, flinging myself down from one branch to another, shielding her body from branches scraping against us from my rapid movement.

I stopped on the last branch and lowered her quickly to her feet, cupping her face, making her look up at me with her wild eyes full of so much fear it sliced into my guts with the heat of a hot blade.

“He will be all right,” I said. “This I promise.”

Another cry rang out.

She quivered, her fingers digging into my arms. “Please. Help him.”

“Stay here.”

I didn’t wait for her nod. I only pressed her back against the trunk and made sure she was steady before I leaped off the branch and raced toward the area where I’d heard the scream. Guttural cries rang out ahead along with the chitter of at least one shayde. They rarely hunted during the day but rarely did not mean never. I wanted to bellow for him to hold on, that I was coming, but I couldn’t let anything know I was on my way, that I was filled with a fierce resolve to slash and burn through everything to reach Brunnen.

I burst into a clearing and spied him standing near the edge, his back against a tree, his staff lifted.

Three shaydes surrounded him. If he could leap, he might be able to grab a branch above, though the odds weren’t good that he’d find one. The slender tree hadn’t grown tall enough to produce limbs that would support the youngling’s weight.

Sunlight glinted off tears streaming down his face, but even in his fear, strength glistened in his eyes. They flicked to me.

“Stay away,” he cried. “They’ll hurt you. Get to Kaila. Keep her safe.” Stark desperation came through in his voice. “I’ll . . . hold them off. Protect her!”

One of the shaydes spun and started stalking toward me on its four legs ending in thick, sharp claws. Its gleaming red eyes locked on me, revealing my imminent death. When it reached the middle of the meadow, light hit the enormous lizard creature, and its long, spiked tail swept furiously back and forth behind it. One beast would be a challenge for an orc warrior. Three?

If we were going to survive, I needed to be clever.

I stomped my foot, and a second shayde peeled away from Brunnen, joining the other that approached me like a predator with prey.

Something blurred past me, and my guttural groan rang out.

Kaila streaked toward the shaydes, waving her arms with one of my short blades in her hands. If willpower could take down the beasts, she’d do it. But she didn’t stand a chance. She was soft, fragile, and nowhere near ready to take on this threat.

I rushed after her, putting myself between her and the shaydes while Brunnen cried out and slashed toward the remaining shayde with his staff.

The beast yelped and sprang backward, but I was too focused on the ones who’d noted Kaila’s arrival and locked their eyes on fresh, more delicate prey.

“No.” With a bellow, I leaped, springing over her and landing hard in front of her. She ran into my back. Her blade nicked my shoulder, but I barely felt the sting. I was too centered on what I’d need to do to protect my mate and her brother.

I’d die to make sure they made it out of this meadow alive.

The two shaydes rushed me from either side, and I swung out with my blade. It was knocked aside by the leathery hide of one of them and fell from my grip. Before I could pull another, the beast took advantage of my lack of defense, moving in closer. Saliva dripped from its fangs, and I saw my death in its eyes.

I would face it bravely.

They sprung on me at once, knocking into me.

Kaila’s scream echoed around me, followed by Brunnen’s hoarse cry.

More than anything, I wanted to save her. I needed to be the male she could proudly call her own. To give her everything I had inside me, then gather more together and hand that to her as well, along with my heart.

I was facing death too soon. Why was it always too late for a male like me?

Kaila . . .

I landed hard on my back with the beast on top of me, its claws scraping across my sides though not biting deep. Not yet, but soon.

I latched my fingers around its throat, squeezing, but its scaled hide was too thick, and the creature didn’t even wheeze.

“Stop it.” Kaila flailed against the beast, smacking it with bare hands, while the second sprung over the first and landed behind her. “No, please. Leave him alone.”

“Run,” I groaned. “Run!”

She continued hitting the shayde. I couldn’t see Brunnen; couldn’t hear him. Was he already dead?

It wasn’t supposed to end like this. I was their protector, their guide to the village. I needed more time to show her . . .

The shayde’s head snapped toward mine.

And it licked me.

Stunned, my grip slackened.

The shayde purred. A glance to my right showed the second nuzzling Kaila’s back, also purring. While she remained frozen, her wide eyes filled with tears, it licked up her back, dragging her blouse along with it.

Then I remembered Taen. The shayde had stayed near my clan while Dakur’s mate, Nia, recovered from her wound. The beast hadn’t come close enough for me to interact with it, and after seeing it kill a man and rip him apart, I wasn’t sure I wanted to get anywhere near it. Frightened themselves, my people were grateful. A creature like that didn’t belong among us, though Dakur assured everyone the Taen wouldn’t harm a teetser.

“What’s happening?” Kaila sobbed.

I nudged the shayde aside and rose to my feet, taking her hand and pulling her into my arms.

Brunnen was still pressed back against the tree with the shayde standing in front of him, watching.

“Push it aside,” I said, my heart a furious storm battering my ribs. “It won’t harm you.”

“Shayde,” he shrieked. “Shayde!”

“These shaydes are . . . pets.”

“That’s not possible.” Kaila pulled out of my arms, but she darted to the side. The two shaydes stood nearby, gazing at us with their tails sweeping back and forth. I expected them to leap on us, harm us, yet they almost appeared eager to play.

“My friend, Dakur, found three shayde kits when they were young. Their mother was killed, and they wouldn’t have survived on their own. He took them to his clan here in the forest and raised them among the orcs. They’re tame.” Mostly. “Playful. And they won’t harm us.” They shouldn’t, that is.

Did they hunt humans and orcs like all their brethren?

Kaila ran to her brother and put her arms around him, prying him away from the tree. They sidled around to the back and gazed at the shaydes with a mixture of awe and terror.

“Make them leave,” Kaila cried out. “Please.”

“I don’t know how.” I flipped my hands at them. “Go. Go away.”

The shaydes continued to watch us, purring.

“I don’t know any commands to make them do that,” I said. “Come back. We need to gather our things and leave.” I waited patiently while they hurried along the edge of the woods, staying as far as possible from the shaydes.

Other orc clans had made a treaty with the humans living in Kaila’s village. In exchange for two human brides each year in the mate hunt, the orcs provided protection from shaydes and ashenclaws, another predator that hunted at night in packs. Kaila and Brunnen’s fear of the shaydes was justified. For many years, humans had been killed by these creatures in the forest.

“Truly, they won’t harm you,” I said. May the fates make it so. “They’re friends.”

Brunnen wiped his eyes. He was brave and strong, but he was still on the cusp of being a child. Fear lurked in his eyes, but he darted a glance my way. “You’re sure?”

As sure as I could be. “I assume some of my friends are in this area, perhaps visiting the village. The shaydes must’ve come with them.”

“There are orcs about?” Kaila’s wild gaze scanned the woods. “They won’t hurt us, will they?”

“Of course not. Everyone in the woods is friendly.”

“Except shaydes.” A touch of fear came through in her voice. “And ashenclaws. I didn’t think they’d come out during the day, that they only hunted at night.”

“As I said, these three are friendly. They behave differently.” I assumed they also hunted at night, though I wasn’t going to mention that.

“Do you think I could touch one?” Curiosity had nudged aside Brunnen’s fear. He strode over to stand beside me, watching the shaydes with a stunned expression and trembling hands.

“I believe so. Be cautious about it.”

“Don’t get near them,” Kaila said shrilly. She remained by the woods, not coming closer.

“Turren says they’re friendly,” Brunnen said. “Haven’t you ever wanted to touch one?”

“No.” She swallowed, her gaze traveling from me to her brother and the shaydes. But she left the woods and came over to hover behind me, her hand on my lower back. I liked that she sought reassurance from me, but I didn’t like the terror still lurking in her eyes. “Be careful, Brunnen. I don’t like this.”

I tugged her around in front of me and held her in the shelter of my arms.

Brunnen frowned our way before shrugging and turning back to the shaydes. “How do I touch them?”

“Let them sniff your fingers.”

“They’ll bite him,” Kaila whimpered.

“I don’t think they will.”

“Think?” She huffed. “Please don’t, Brunnen.”

“You’ve spent most of your life protecting him, but I’m here now. Trust me in this?”

She looked up at me, so frightened and concerned. If only I could reassure her. “You’re sure?”

“Look.”

Her gasp rang out. “Brunnen . . .”

Her brother stood among the purring shaydes, carefully stroking one face, then another while the beasts gently nudged him.

“It’s . . .” Kaila shook her head. “This isn’t possible. Shaydes kill us. Eat us. They don’t lick us.”

“These do.”

“I wonder how many other creatures could be friendly if they were raised by us?” Brunnen said. “Imagine. I’ve always thought the ashenclaws were beautiful. Such thick fur. And those eyes!”

“You haven’t seen any ashenclaws except at a great distance,” she said. “How do you know anything like that?”

“I used to go into the woods sometimes,” he said with a lift of his chin.

“What? When?” She stepped toward him, scooting around the back of a shayde to approach him from behind, where she clung to his shirt. She watched the beasts who continued to lick and nuzzle Brunnen’s belly.

“Not at night,” he said.

“I didn’t think so. You’re always at home, safe with me.”

“But when you were working, and I didn’t have anything to do, I used to go to the woods to collect wood for the smithy shop or to look for tubers along the river. You like them a lot and you work so hard. I wanted to help.”

“You went to the woods alone?” She pressed her forehead against his back, and her voice lowered to a tone that crushed me. “You went alone? How can I protect you when you do something like that? You . . .” Turning away from him, she stumbled toward the woods.

I went after her, remaining with her while she walked down a narrow trail weaving through the dense vegetation.

Finally, she stopped at the edge of the river, and I suspected she would’ve kept going if she hadn’t reached the water.

She dropped to her knees and held her face in her hands.

I knelt with her and tugged her into my arms.

“You should stay with Brunnen,” she said. “He’s with those beasts.”

“They won’t hurt him. I want to be with you, Kaila. Protecting you. Holding you. Giving you whatever I can of myself to make you feel better.” It hurt to swallow, to breathe.

“We’re vulnerable out here. Why did I insist we leave the village? If we’d stayed, we would’ve been safe.”

I didn’t know what to say to that, so I said nothing, just held her while she trembled in my arms. She didn’t cry, and I almost wished she would. That would release some of the tension thrumming through her body. It might give her peace.

“When I saw the shaydes surrounding him, I was terrified,” she said, looking up at me. “I’ve done all I could to protect him, but they would’ve ripped him apart before I could get to him. They would’ve killed him and then . . . then I would’ve betrayed the promise I made to my parents after they died, that I’d keep him safe.” Her gaze sadly took in the forest around us. “It’s beautiful here. I’m sure there are other places just as lovely. But the forest is a beast coiled beneath the bushes, ready to strike.” She shook her head. “I should’ve stayed in the village.”

“Do you want me to take you back?” I’d do anything for her, even that.

“No.” She eased out of my arms and stood. I remained where I was, kneeling before her, my heart held out in my hands. I didn’t like the resolution I found shining in her eyes. “I know what I need to do.” After stroking my face, she leaned into me, kissing me deeply. It caught my breath and swept me away. All I could think of was her and her exquisite touch.

She lifted her face and studied mine for a heartbeat before walking around me and back down the path.

Rising, I followed. I wanted to bellow, to charge through the woods. To sweep her up and take her to a place where she’d always feel secure. Protected. Loved.

But I wasn’t sure that place existed.

We returned to the meadow to find Brunnen waiting, though the shaydes were gone.

“I was patting them when they suddenly turned around and bolted into the woods.” He pointed toward where we would soon be heading. “I don’t think I did anything to make them leave.”

“Maybe they heard something and went to investigate,” I said. I couldn’t take my eyes off Kaila, watching her posture and her eyes that gave nothing away.

She studiously avoided looking at me.

I sensed the progress I’d made last night had been negated by the shaydes, but I didn’t know what I could do about it. I was nearly out of time, and I hated that the fates would hold her out to me, then snatch her away.

“Are you ready to leave?” she asked both Brunnen and I.

We nodded and returned to where we’d left our things hooked to a low branch. After eating the food left from the night before, we started walking.

I wanted to keep our pace slow. Kaila appeared ready to run. And with each step, my heart grew heavier.

Mid-morning, sunlight slaked through the vegetation ahead when I spied the walls of the village.

“Almost there,” I said. I wanted to ask Kaila—no, beg her—to stay with me, but I was beginning to suspect it was over. Like in my past, I’d done my best, and it wasn’t good enough. The thought crushed me.

I wasn’t giving up. As long as I could still suck in wind and lift my arms to hold them out to her, I wouldn’t give up. But how could you convince someone to love you when they saw you as the one thing they feared above all others?

We stopped at the edge of the forest.

The guard on the wall saw us and lifted their spear. “Hello?”

“It’s Turren,” I called out. I’d visited the village days before the mate hunt, when my heart was full of hope, and I was excited to think I might get to bond with a mate.

My hope was crumbling fast, and only a smile from Kaila would shore it up, a smile she wasn’t sending my way. She stared toward the fortress with hunger, and I knew why. She saw it like it was her old village, only better. It would give her the security she craved, the stability she’d floundered to hold onto since her parents died.

I could give this to her, and I’d tried to show her, tell her, how wonderful it would be not just to stand by my side but to walk through the desert and mountain passes with me. I ached to share the beauty of my world with her, to show her how amazing that life could be.

But I’d never force her. If she came with me, it had to be because she not only trusted me, but because she believed that life with me would give her everything she needed.

“I’ve brought two humans to talk to the caedos about living within the walls,” I added when Brunnen and Kaila remained silent and hidden among the forest shadows.

“Welcome, Turren,” the guard said, lowering her spear. “Send them forward.”

I looked their way.

Brunnen looked confused and sad. Kaila appeared determined, the resolution she’d come to in the forest still thriving within her. They stepped from the woods.

I remained behind. I couldn’t do it. Going with them meant saying goodbye.

Did warriors cry?

“What are your names?” the leader of the village, Mavileen, shouted from the top of the wall.

Brunnen stopped. Kaila took a few steps farther before turning back to look his way. Her gaze drifted across me where I remained hidden, but I couldn’t tell what she was thinking or feeling.

Actually, I knew. I just didn’t want to admit it to myself.

“I’m Kaila,” she said, turning back to Mavileen. She extended her hand to her brother. “This is my brother, Brunnen. We’d . . .” Her lungs expanded then released. “We’ve come seeking a place in your village. I worked in the gardens where we used to live, and my brother’s quite eager to apprentice with a smithy. He helped the smithy in our old village.”

“Both of you are welcome,” Mavileen said, her gaze pinning me in place inside the forest. “Will you come with them, Turren?”

Should I? Would a few more hours make any difference, or would it just make it harder for me to tell her goodbye?

“No?” Mavileen said. “Know you’re welcome at any time, my friend.”

I saluted her and waited.

As the gate started to open, Kaila looked back at me. Only now could I read sorrow there, but it wasn’t enough to change her mind.

I’d done my best. I’d truly tried. There wasn’t anything more I could do.

My chest caved in, and a guttural cry rose up my throat. I bit it back as my pendant blazed, shouting out that she was mine. I was hers. We belonged together.

Just one more time, I wanted to lean close to her. Bury my face in her glorious hair and breathe in her scent, her warmth.

Turning, she faced the fortress once more. She extended her hand to Brunnen. He looked back at me and shook his head.

Then she tugged him forward, through the opening of the gate.

She walked away from me.

She took all I was with her.