Chapter 35

PALOMA

My heart races when I hear Atox. He’s returned in time to save me.

The edge of my father’s knife presses against my abdomen and I suck in air as he slices into me. Not deep, but enough to deliver a message. He’s not only threatening my life but that of my unborn child. Atox’s child. A child my caring yet gruff orc longs for but doesn’t yet know exists.

“You’re coming with me,” my father repeats.

“You gave me away months ago. You didn’t want me. You never have.” I try to keep my tone respectful so I don’t anger him further.

His mouth lowers to my ear and he whispers, “You are my leverage. Tell that barbaric orc leader that you don’t want him. So we can get out of here alive. All of us.” He presses the knife against my baby.

The horror of what he’ll do strangles me.

“Now!” my father growls through clenched jaws.

“Grak?” I say, my eyes still on Atox. They’ve never left him, as he’s a source of strength for me, one I desperately need in this moment.

“Come to me, mate.”

The knife presses into me, the blade making a shallow cut across my abdomen. I inhale sharply, but don’t move.

“I…I’m not your mate any longer,” I call out with determination, given the blade biting into me.

“You are my mate. You will always be mine. We performed the risha.”

I strain to hold it together, so I don’t cry out and cause my father to stab me. “Your custom. Not mine. It was meaningless to me,” I say the words as convincingly as I can, my heart clenching as I do. The risha held meaning to me, because it held meaning for Atox. We formed a bond that night, more than I realized was possible.

Atox’s lower lip pulls back in a half-snarl aimed not at me, but my father and the other men nearby. My eyes scan the scene quickly. Sojek’s on the ground, beaten, but alive. No other orcs nearby, not that Atox needs backup. He’s a trained fighter. He could defeat my father and his thugs, but at the cost of our child. I have to convince him to back off or my father will do as he threatens.

“You are mine. I’ve knotted you.”

“Filthy animal,” my father spits on the ground. My eyes wander from Atox, as my brain races through all the scenarios. My father’s men are armed with weapons our colony didn’t have previously, including several blasters. A weapon I’ve only seen once before. On a coalition soldier on Earth.

My orc is outnumbered and outgunned.

And yet he isn’t backing down. Pride fills me knowing he won’t leave without me. I take solace in that and try not to panic because of what that means, too. Danger for both him and our unborn baby. With that knife pressing against my belly, my father could kill my unborn child in seconds. I can’t risk that.

“I’m not yours anymore,” I shout to Atox. “You lied about everything.”

My orc’s face remains stoic, unyielding. Damn, he’s not buying this. I have to make him believe and hope that he figures out what I’m doing.

“This is not the time to discuss these issues, female. Come to me. Now.” A growl accompanies his words, one I believe is meant for me. I’m doing more than disobeying him. I’m making him look weak.

“You hid the truth about Lily from me and my people,” I persist. “You deceived everyone.” While I’m speaking, it occurs to me my father also knew Lily was alive and didn’t care that she was hiding out with an orc. He’s only using her as an excuse to get out of the treaty with the orcs in favor of his new treaty with the vints.

“This is none of your affair, female,” Atox says, showing more of his tusks.

“I’m not your property,” I say, nearly wincing as it’s what I accused him of two months ago. But it’s not true.

“You belong to me. I belong to you. The status of the treaty with the humans does not affect us.”

I want to shout that I love him and didn’t mean a word I said, but my father changes the angle of the knife, pointing the tip at my belly. A message to end this with Atox. Quickly.

“I don’t belong to you. I never have. I’m returning to my people.”

“They are not your people any longer. They sold you, Paloma.”

He used my name. He’s getting desperate.

“They sold me, and you bought me. But at least with them I’ll have human babies, not ones that are half-beast.” I feel sick saying those words, especially talking about our baby that way. The baby he doesn’t know exists.

A twist of my arm spurs me to continue shredding my bond with Atox. “You never cared about me. I was nothing more than a breeder to you. A tool to be used.” I hate the words I fling at him because they’re not true. Atox cares. I know it in my heart and see it in his eyes as he stares at me.

“I wanted you. From the start. I still want you. You mean everything to me, my little warrior.”

I’ve never heard him plead like this, not in private and definitely not in public. It is so very… unorc-like.

Eight more human men crowd the area, lending support to my father. They carry knives, iron rods, stones even. Anything that can do damage. But being outnumbered won’t stop Atox if he believes he has something to fight for.

He’s fighting for me. And I’m fighting for our baby.

Atox thinks I have the freedom to run into his arms and stand at his side. That I can and will choose him over my former colony.

I’ve already chosen him, with all of my being. But I’m not free to act on that choice or even explain it to him, not without risking our child.

“End this. Now,” my father whispers in my ear, the snarl in his words telling me he’s losing patience.

“Do you love me, Atox?” I ask an unfair question, in front of everyone, but I’m desperate. I cannot risk our child.

“You are mine,” he says, the ridges on his forehead scrunch together.

I shake my head. “That’s not the same. If you don’t love me, then you need to let me go and find someone who you truly care about.” I swallow hard, because deep down I know he loves me, even though he’s never said the word. “If you care about me, even a little, then let me go. That’s what true love is, sacrificing for the happiness of another.”

“You will be happy with me.”

“No, I won’t. I haven’t been. I can only be happy with my people, Atox. You don’t understand my ways and my needs and you never will. You know I’m speaking the truth. My place is not with you. I’ll rebel against you at every turn if you force me to return. Find yourself another woman to give you kids.” As I turn and walk with my father toward Owen, my mind races. There has to be a way out of this.

Owen appears on my left, trapping me between him and my father, not that he needs to. My father’s knife remains pressed against my baby, my little one who hasn’t even given me a baby bump yet.

A roar shakes the ground beneath my feet. I spin around to see Atox charging toward me.

“Mine!” he roars.

My heart sinks at the pain I hear in his voice, and yet knowing he hasn’t given up on me fills me with the purest joy. But he has to let me go, or our baby will pay the price.

“Atox—” I call out to stop him. He has to listen.

“Shoot!” my father yells.

I watch in horror as Owen lifts his blaster.

“No!” I shout, trying to hit Owen’s arm and destroy his aim. My father pins my arms behind me as Owen fires.

A bolt of blue energy arcs across the market, striking Atox in his chest. A plume of dirt shoots into the air as my mate crashes to the ground.

I try running to him, but my father pulls me toward the carts. “He’s not moving!” I yell, but Atox doesn’t move. “Let me go!”

“He’s dead. He can’t touch you anymore.”

The universe crashes down on me. Atox is dead.

No…no… He can’t be dead! Please don’t let him be dead.

“Atox!” I yell. He doesn’t answer.

Atox lies crumpled on his side, his lifeless eyes staring back at me.

My knees buckle and my father holds me up.

“One less filthy animal on Kovos,” he says as I struggle not to pass out.

Again, I try to run to Atox, but the men hold me tight.

He’s dead.

My orc can’t be dead.

I strain to watch over my shoulder as Sojek runs to Atox.

Atox isn’t moving. Smoke rises from his chest where the blaster fire struck.

Dead.

“No!” I yell.

The men keep pushing me farther from my mate, the man I love.

“You’ll thank me later, when we get rid of that monstrosity growing in you.”

Fear and pain twist inside me, only to be shoved aside by anger at these murderers.

“You won’t touch my baby,” I growl with all the venom I have inside me.

“It’s not your choice.”

“Sleep with one eye open, old man, because if my baby dies, so do you.”

ATOX IM GRAK

Fire spreadsthrough my chest like lightning. The power decimates every nerve in my body, making it impossible to move, to talk, to breathe.

Sound disappears completely and my vision wavers as my body strikes the ground, compressing my lungs and forcing the last of the air from my body. In a haze, I watch my mate moving farther away from me, disappearing with the other humans.

She’s leaving with them… That blow burns worse than the blaster fire.

The pain spreads to every part of my body unlike any I’ve known before. My thoughts are in disarray, confusion overtaking me. The will to live evades me until I remember a warrior doesn’t give up. A warrior—a grak—kills before he lets another have the advantage. Kills before the enemy takes what does not belong to them.

I took too long to react.

I should have ignored my mate’s words, taken her by force, and returned home.

You don’t deserve to be grak. You’re weak. Like your mother.

My father’s voice fills my mind as images of his atrocities flood my brain. Bile rises from my stomach with the need to satisfy the grak who could never be satisfied. If he weren’t already dead, I would kill him for the damage he did to me and my family. Remaining stuck in the past won’t get my graka back.

I will focus my revenge and anger on those who shot me and took my female. Destroy them, all of them. They are insignificant. Insects I will step on and drive into the dirt until there is nothing left of them.

Then, I will take her back… except she walked away with no concern for me. No desire to remain with me.

I swallow hard, trying to accept the reality.

She lied to me.

Never wanted me.

You’re weak. You trusted the enemy. You will fail.

“Not weak,” I roar as I force my eyes open.

“Grak?” Sojek’s voice calls out. I turn my head to see my bloody and bruised nephew kneeling at my side. “I thought you were dead.”

It is not my time to die. Not until I’ve killed my enemy.

Sojek removes my leather harness which is smoking from the blaster fire. “I failed you, my grak.”

Explaining to him that I was the one who failed, not him, is not a priority. My tunic is singed, and my knives melted into my leather. The string of knives on my harness spread the force of the energy blast leaving me with minor burns on the exposed areas of my chest and arms. My knives are the only reason I survived, though with the pain rocking through me, it’s clear how close I came to dying.

Muscles protesting as if I’m carrying three warriors on my back, I force myself up.

Sojek grabs a waterskin from a nearby stand that the humans abandoned along with their wares and pours it over the burns on my chest. He’s smart, a quick thinker.

I take the container from him and swallow the rest of the water. The humans tried to kill me. And my female betrayed me by leaving me.

“Get me to my gorja,” I order Sojek.

My nephew’s eyes catch mine. With a slight nod, he leaves me leaning against the stall as he runs to gather my gorja and the cart.

My hands and feet grow numb from the blast to my body but Sojek returns with both gorjas in minutes, the cart nowhere to be seen. He’ll retrieve the cart later. He understands the urgency and knows I will not be hauled out of here in the cart, to appear weak in front of our enemies. I will praise him later. For now, I will ride out of this stinking market on my gorja so every human here knows I survived.

With great difficulty, I hoist myself onto my mount. Sojek keeps his distance, not offering to help, as that would make me look weak.

“We’re leaving, Sojek. I have an attack to plan,” I say loudly. I no longer have my female, but I am still orc, and our enemies will soon learn what that means.