Chapter Thirty-Three

Chapter Thirty-Three

Elijah

“He kept taking my Play-Doh.” Lucy dunked her French fry in ketchup as she talked to me about her school day. “Then, when I went to read a book, he tried to take it from me!”

“Sounds like a real asshole,” I told her.

“Elijah!” Hadley gasped as Eli nursed in her lap while she ate. We were sitting at her kitchen table. A few days had gone by since Hadley told Lucy about us—she called me her boyfriend. I felt fucking special when she said it, too. Nothing had changed, though. Lucy acted like nothing was different. I was already spending a lot of time with them before Hadley’s announcement.

“Uh-oh, you’re in trouble.” Lucy giggled. “You said a bad word.”

“You do not repeat the things that Elijah says.” I could feel the heat from Hadley’s eyes on my face, but I didn’t glance over as I bit into my burger.

“It’s not the first time she’s heard me,” I said.

“Nope. Elijah says bad words a lot,” Lucy agreed with me.

Hadley sighed.

“Ma wants you all to come to her house tomorrow for dinner,” I added quickly.

“I work tomorrow.”

“I know. That’s why she’ll start cooking around six so that by the time you’re off, it’ll be done. I can pick up Eli and Lucy from your parents while you head here to change. Or you can let me keep them…”

“I don’t think so.” Hadley laughed.

“You don’t think so to what?”

“To you babysitting. Of course we’ll go to dinner.”

I breathed out my relief. “I can babysit.”

She cackled harder. “While I’ll admit you’ve made a lot of progress with holding Eli, it doesn’t change the fact that you’ve done nothing else.”

“Okay, show me. Stop giving him the tit and give me a bottle.”

Lucy giggled, and Hadley rolled her eyes. “Baby steps,” she reminded me.

“Baby steps,” I agreed half-heartedly. “Do you guys want to spend the night at my house?”

Lucy jumped out of her seat. “That sounds so fun. Please, Mommy?”

“Do you know how tired Mommy is, Lucy?” Hadley whined.

“You can lie down when we get there. Lucy and I can watch a movie before she has to go to bed.”

“Can I pick it out?” Lucy asked.

_______

Despite me telling her to go lie down, Hadley still fought her sleep until she crashed on the couch before Lucy did while watching a movie. Eli was asleep on my bed downstairs. I carried Lucy up to the only guest bedroom with a bed in it. I would let her pick which room she wanted at some point whenever I was sure her mother wouldn’t neuter me for suggesting Lucy have a room at my place.

But then again, would Hadley want to move somewhere else down the line? If so, I would have to ask her. It might take a while to resale the house.

Baby steps, I reminded myself.

Hadley and the kids were so close yet it felt like there was a mountain between us. When a man knows, he knows. I never understood how some people rushed into things head first until Hadley. I never knew I wanted a wife and kids until I found her, but I missed her terribly each night that I didn’t get to be with her.

I took a second and stared down at Lucy as I tucked the blanket under her chin. Something in my heart swelled, and there was no questioning it. I loved her and caught myself on more than one occasion wishing she was mine. She was a part of Hadley, and I was their Elijah. I wanted to be their family. And that was all that mattered. It still bewildered me how anyone could take them for granted. Turning away, I was almost out of the room when I heard her small voice whisper, “Goodnight, Elijah.”

I swallowed down the emotions that clogged my throat. “Goodnight, Lucy.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too, thief. I’m glad you dropped your chips that day. I got to know you guys because of that.”

“You’re the thief.” Her drowsy voiced muffled her giggle. A second later, she was asleep again.

As I stepped out of the room, I left the door opened so that the bathroom light from across the hall could filter in for her. Tomorrow, I’d buy her a nightlight.

I stopped outside the room and placed my hand over my chest. It didn’t matter that Lucy’s words were probably part of her routine with Hadley. What mattered was that I could provide for someone else’s kids, and it was something I wanted to do. I was fucking glad I got this chance to love them.

Minutes later, I stared down at Hadley— so small and fragile in my eyes. She laid curled up on the couch. I rubbed my chest again feeling like a poor sap who couldn’t keep his emotions in check.

So gone. I was so fucking gone.

I scooped her up and carried her to bed. She woke up, asking weird stuff about her kids before she fell asleep next to Eli.

I never went to sleep early. Actually, I didn’t sleep much—a few hours every night had always been enough for me. That was why I went into the basement and messed around with some graphic designs on the computer, keeping the music on low so that I didn’t wake them up.

I didn’t know how long I was down there, but it was long enough for me to switch to drawing when Hadley’s clumsy steps came down the stairs. Eli was in her arms and a bottle rested in one hand. Her hair was wild, eyes half-closed, I swear she was the best—my most favorite thing to look at in any given moment. She stopped in front of me and plopped Eli onto my lap. I gawked at her when she shoved the bottle into my hand. “Since you both want to stay up so late, have at it.”

Without another word, she turned around and trotted up the stairs. Eli regarded me like he was just as confused as I was. We had a staring contest until I decided to get comfortable holding him. Several awkward minutes passed with me trying to get situated. He looked at me the same way I did him—like we were trying to figure each other out. “There,” I told him hesitantly. “We’re kind of comfortable.” I offered him the bottle, and he took it slowly, his eyes fixed on me. “You can stop creeping. We’re managing,” I said to Hadley who I knew never went all the way up from the sound of her steps. “You can lie on my other side…”

She made her way back down. “Were you drawing?” she whispered softly as she lifted my arm up and snuggled against me. I didn’t think she’d actually want to join me on the floor, but I was glad she did.

“Yeah, I normally don’t go to sleep until about two every night.”

“Yet, you constantly tell me to get some sleep,” she mumbled.

“That’s different. You’re different. I don’t like seeing you tired.”

“Will you come to bed with me, please?” Her beautiful blue eyes fluttered up at me.

I kissed her brow. “All you had to do was ask.”