Chapter 4

4

Nick

Later that night, with a red plastic cup full of beer in my hand, I watch as the freshmen and sophomores who are still here for the winter interim run up and down the hallway of the jock building, screaming like banshees. Most students went home for the holidays already, but since not everyone can afford to fly home, there are always a few stragglers. I’m one of them. Plus, my parents’ house is full of kids. They don’t need another body in there or another mouth to feed.

I love my parents, they’re good people. They take in older foster kids that are hard to find placements for. They’re good kids usually, just misunderstood and abused. It’s hard to connect with them sometimes since they have walls up to protect themselves, but it’s always been worth the effort. Brent was once a foster kid in our house. He was with us for all our high school years, and since we got along so well, I shared a room with him. Mom and Dad never forced me to share my room since having the foster kids was their choice, but Brent and I were thick as thieves. He stayed in Washington for school while I got a full ride to Colorado, but I talk to him daily.

There’s music playing from a speaker someone has set in a doorway, there are people everywhere, rolls of toilet paper being thrown around, and someone is puking, but I can’t see them. My room isn’t on this floor, so I don’t care. Puke is not my problem tonight.

Unless it’s one of my freshmen. Fuck.

Straightening up off the wall, I follow the sound of vomiting down the hallway, avoiding the couples hooking up and the dude passed out on the floor. He’s not a football player, so he’s not my problem.

I pull a condom out of my pocket and slap it against the chest of one of my freshman teammates.

“Don’t be an idiot,” I tell him and watch the girl for a second to make sure she’s sober enough for consent.

She lifts an eyebrow at me. “What?”

“How many drinks have you had?” I ask her, but she doesn’t look intoxicated at all.

“One.”

“Cool.” I nod and pat Chad’s shoulder. He reaches for the girl’s hand, and they disappear into a room. I make it a few more doors down the hallway before I find the puking kid and the one man I want to see, Joey Carpenter. I can picture how his shaggy brown hair hangs down around his collar, sharp green eyes taking in everything around him, and his cheekbones that were chiseled from granite. He’s standing with his back to me, arms crossed over his chest, and he lets out a deep sigh.

This is the side of him I haven’t gotten to witness yet, and I’m hungry for it.

“I swear to fuck, Riggs.” Joey shakes his head. Riggs is not one of mine, but he is an idiot, and finding some of my dumbasses with him is not uncommon. Normally, the guys stick with teammates since that’s who we all know the best, but a lot of freshmen have to take the same classes, so some of the guys on the team have started hanging around the hockey players.

I slap Joey’s back in solidarity, and he glances back at me. His eyes go wide in alarm for a split second before he covers it with the captain mask he wears so well. I can see on his face that he feels the weight of responsibility. He’s one of those that wants to save these guys from making bad decisions, but he can’t.

“Fucking freshman.” I shake my head, leaning my forearm on Joey’s shoulder when I find the kid with his head in a trash can. “What did he drink?”

“From what I can tell, everything,” Joey bites out and pinches the bridge of his nose.

The kid groans and finally stops throwing up, dropping down to his side on the carpet.

“Nope, get up.” Joey grabs him under his arm and hauls him to his feet. “You’re done. Go to bed.”

I step aside but glance around the room to find two of my assholes half turned away from me.

“Who dared him?” I fold my arms and set my jaw, staring the guys down.

“Allen,” one of the guys says, throwing his teammate under the bus.

“What the fuck, dude!?” Allen yells at the snitch.

“Allen, room.” I point over my shoulder for the door. “You make bad decisions.”

He stomps off, muttering something about backstabbing roommates.

“You’re his roommate?” I ask Robbie, the snitch. When his eyes widen and his face pales, I know the answer. I shake my head and tsk him. “You done fucked up, A-A-Ron.”

“Fuck!” Robbie takes off past me for his room, and I sigh. Bunch of idiots, the lot of them. No loyalty.

I wander down the rest of the hallway and look for more of my guys. As a senior and the special team’s captain for the football team, I have to watch out for my guys too. There are six team captains this year, and it’s my second year being one, so I’m used to looking out for the team, but I swear, freshmen get dumber every year.

When I don’t find any more fuckery, I check the second floor, which is the female floor, and then head back up to the third. When I don’t find Robbie outside the room on his ass, I assume he’s okay and decide to use the stairs to get to the fifth floor instead of the elevator. I’m around the fourth floor when I run into Joey, sitting on the landing.

“Hey, you okay?” I lean against the railing, taking in the defeated droop of his shoulders and his head in his hands.

“I don’t know what I’m doing,” he says to the floor.

“Well, you’re currently sitting in a stairwell. Does that help?” I offer, trying to lighten the mood.

He lifts his head and glares at me, completely unamused. I chuckle softly and drop down next to him, our arms brushing in the tight space.

“What’s going on? You wanna talk about it?”

It’s quiet for a minute before he sighs and lies back on the landing to stare at the bottom of the stairs above us.

“I’m the team captain this year. There are twenty-five guys on the team, and I’m responsible for all of them. If they fuck off and get in trouble, end up with alcohol poisoning, or drunk driving, it’s on me.”

“Uh, no the fuck it’s not,” I say matter-of-factly. “They are grown-ass adults. This is my second year as a captain, I understand the pressure you’re under to make sure the team works on the field or ice, whatever you call it.” He chuckles when I correct myself. “And yeah, infighting outside of the game affects performance, but if they go off and get drunk or decide to get high, that’s not on you. Not once have I seen anyone turn around in a locker room and ask where the captain was when some asshole ends up in the ER for alcohol poisoning. And trust me, that situation has happened more than once.”

I lie back on the floor and turn my head to look at him. We barely fit in the space, my body against both the wall and him. For just a second, I let my eyes flick to his mouth when he licks his bottom lip. My dick thickens in my jeans at the mental image of grinding against him, moans and panting breaths, deep kisses and goosebumps.

Fuck.

I turn my face away from him and force myself to breathe. Since anyone could walk in here at any time, I can’t be springing a woody in here. Especially if Joey isn’t out.

“What was that?” Joey sits up and leans on one elbow so he’s looking down at me, and it is not helping my current situation. At. All. The urge to reach for him and lower his lips to mine is so damn strong. I ball my fists, then shove them under my ass to keep them to myself.

“Nothing.” I shake my head and sit up, forcing him to move.

“Right,” he says knowingly.

“Look, I’m pretty sure freshmen were created to drive the upperclassmen nuts. I know we did too. At this point, a lot of them are on their own for the first time in their lives. Much like toddlers, they’re testing limits and finding what their boundaries are. We just need to make sure we set a good example, be available if they want to talk, and try to keep them from killing each other.” I pat his knee, and it takes a lot of self-control to remove my hand afterward.

“How old are you?” Joey asks. Surprised, I turn to look at him.

“Twenty-two. Why?”

“I have freshmen who are twenty-one. That kid tonight, is one of two of the eighteen-year-olds I have. In hockey, it’s pretty common to start college late. I’m twenty-five.” He takes a deep breath. “I feel like I have nothing in common with a teenager anymore. How am I supposed to lead them when I can’t connect with them?”

It’s admirable that he takes this so seriously. Maybe I’ve taken advantage of the fact that there are five other captains to help carry the weight, but there are also a hundred and seventeen guys on the team.

“A lot of times, these guys need to learn lessons the hard way. They’re going to fuck up, and they have to deal with the consequences. That’s life. You can’t protect them from that.” Getting an idea, I slap his chest and stand. “Come on.”

He sighs but stands, following along behind me to the third floor and into my dorm. My roommate is one of the lucky ones that get to leave during winter interim, so I’m alone until New Year’s.

Joey drops down onto my bed, and I pull out a bottle of vodka from the mini fridge Neal, my roommate, has.

“Didn’t we just tell the freshmen not to make dumb choices?” He smirks at me but takes the cup I offer him with orange juice and vodka in it.

“We know our limits,” I scoff and clink our plastic cups together. I sit next to him, and we both take a drink.

Joey stares into his like it has the answer to life’s questions.

“Can I ask you something?” he finally says, squeezing the cup until it makes a sound, then releasing it.

“Of course.” I shrug and look at his profile. The man is gorgeous, with high cheekbones and a strong jaw. His lips look soft and a little puffy. Is that still from the kissing earlier?

His eyebrows pull together, and he lifts one hand to his mouth to chew on the cuticle that’s already red and ragged.

“How. Like. When.” He takes a deep breath, closes his eyes, then blurts the words out. “How did you know you liked guys?”

I wasn’t sure where this was going, but that wasn’t it.

He turns to look at me, and I carefully wipe the surprise off my face.

“In junior high, I was curious what it was like to kiss a boy. I liked girls, but I thought I might like boys too, but since I felt like I wasn’t allowed to watch them the same way, I wasn’t sure.” I clasp my hands together between my knees. “In high school, a bunch of the football team was having a party, and someone dared another teammate to kiss me. We were drunk and fifteen. So he did, and that was the confirmation I needed.” I shrug like it wasn’t the most stressful time of my life at school. Like I wasn’t terrified that it was written all over my face that I didn’t hate it.

Joey’s eyes drop to my lips for a second before he turns away. Fuck, I wish he would just kiss me already.

“Have you been questioning what you like? Is sex with men new for you?” I ask carefully. I don’t want to spook him if he’s not ready to talk about it, but knowing that much would help. “It’s okay if you are or if you’re solid in what you already know. Sexuality is a spect⁠—”

Joey’s lips meet mine, cutting off my rambling. The man kisses like it’s his profession. It’s intoxicating and all-consuming.

I reach for him, sliding my hand along the side of his neck, and dip my head to the side to change the angle and hope like hell that he doesn’t run again.