Chapter 36

The sound of Butterfly's restful breathing was a beacon of gentleness beneath the darkening sky. The symphony of sleep had always brought me comfort. Everyone, man, devil, angel, or titan still slept at some point or another, and the signature of breathing and movement was as unique to each individual as their very soul.

I liked her sound. She was more pleasant when she was asleep than she ever was while awake.

I ran a hand through my hair, shoving it back between my horns, as I stared listlessly at the camp fire. It was unlikely that she would get much further, really. I wouldn't have to sink her into another nightmare. I could simply not bother to wake her until the time ran out, or mislead her in the swamp, or distract her with some nonsensical side quest—there were a thousand ways I never had to hurt her again.

Placing my hand beneath my scarf, I traced the scar across my heart. Something I'd done an uncountable number of times. It was a nervous tick at this point.

Jericho was my villain, and no one else deserved to feel his wrath. Yet I'd deliver her just the same, because I always did as he demanded. I always would.

Why would I have rushed to her side, if not out of obligation? I should have let her die in the Labyrinth and spared myself from all of this. The weird pangs in my heart, the unfamiliar churning in my stomach… being around her was making me physically ill in a world without viruses. Maybe she really was more special than I'd admit.

I fisted the back of my hair and slumped forward in my seat on a fallen tree trunk. The gentle flames brought welcome heat, though this was already a warm and humid sector. Hotter never hurt.

"Any death rattles in the distance?" Alessi's voice caught in my ear, and I lifted my attention to the fox as he took a seat on the log beside me.

"Your hearing is better than mine, kitty cat. You tell me." I offered a half smile.

Alessi snorted. "You haven't called me that in three hundred years. Getting soft on me, Theron?" The fire lit up his face with a warm orange glow, and the reflection off his fangs, his soft crimson hair, and in the light of his amber eyes was always dangerously attractive. Alessi was beautiful on a normal day. He was breathtaking beside a flame.

"Just exhausted." I shook my head, refusing to admit any such thing out loud. I also wouldn't admit, internally or externally, that I didn't mind sitting with him like this. Sometimes I missed having someone to break up the monotony of eternal life. Alessi used to be that person. That slight boredom probably explained why I was paying so much attention to Butterfly. "This year's Labyrinth has been a roller coaster already, and we still have two full sectors to go."

Alessi's ears were partially shifted, and he scratched himself softly at the base. "Agreed. I've never gotten this involved with a tribute. It's a tremendous amount of work keeping a human's sanity and body intact, it seems."

What a strange sentiment, but it applied to both of us. I didn't typically get this involved either. I tossed another log on the fire before I thought to respond. "Why are you so involved?"

He stared at me with his always mischievous smile. "A better question might be: why are you ? I know you're obligated to place a tracking mark on the tributes before they enter the maze, but you put far more than just a tracking mark. That's full implantation. I didn't know you could put a mate bond on a human, but even if you can, why would you?"

I opened my mouth, but I paused to gather my words before I answered. "It was kind of an accident?"

"Is that an answer or a question?" Alessi raised a brow.

"I don't know." I laughed sheepishly. "I took her into a dream, where I nailed her to a table, and the marks stuck. They never stick." I couldn't talk about this around Jericho or Rai, but I knew Alessi was a safe confidante, despite everything. How I'd come to trust a spy, I couldn't say.

"That explains the last challenge," he said through a half smile. "But that's all it explains. The marks stuck when you put them on me, because it's a common pact between those of Tartarus and those of Olympus, but why would they work on her?"

"Maybe the same reason she heals so fast." I rubbed at my neck, then sank my fingers into the material of my scarf. Alessi watched the motion intently. I never told him why I wore this scarf over my heart. He'd seen my deepest scars, but he didn't know their meaning. "It's not like I've marked a lot of people. Maybe there was something I did differently while I was in her head without realizing it. It was kind of a mess in there."

Alessi said nothing for several moments. He watched the fire, and his fox ear turned slightly in the direction Butterfly was sleeping. Her breathing remained steady and calm.

"Do you regret it?" He asked next. "That you've taken on the physical sensations of a tribute in the most violent and traumatic time in her life?"

"Why would I?" I shrugged. "I haven't felt anything in years, and one peek into her mind was enough to know she was about to make me feel a lot." My own smile betrayed me. I wiped the expression from my face with the back of my hand. "Even if it wasn't intentional, she's not exactly my least favorite tribute we've had."

"Fair enough." If he noticed my expression, he didn't tease me for it for once. "She has been an enjoyable passage of time thus far. I'm just surprised you're okay with taking on all the associated trouble."

"The games always mean trouble, so I was obligated anyway." I shook my head, then grabbed a burning log to flip it and increase the heat. "Now what's your excuse? "

"You." Alessi didn't hesitate at all to admit that. He met my eyes, and as much as I wanted to look away, I didn't. "It's always about you." He sighed as he broke our shared gaze. "I saw the marks on her and the way you got so protective around her. I thought if I stepped in, I'd get another chance to work everything out with you."

"There's nothing to work out." I shook my head, then stood from my seat. I kept my eyes on the fire. "I'm loyal to the king, and you're loyal to no one and nothing. You'll never understand the hierarchy of devils, just like I'll never understand the flights of fancy of angels, so how are we ever going to see eye to eye on anything?"

Alessi frowned. A rare expression on him. He was always playful, never taking anything seriously, but as much as I hated to acknowledge it, he always took me seriously. Maybe I should have felt special for that. Or maybe I should have spoken more carefully knowing that.

"The irony," he began, speaking slowly, like every single word had to be measured, "is that I'm the most loyal person you know. I'm still here, still trying to win you over, because of that loyalty. The difference between you me is that my loyalty is based on respect and admiration, whereas yours is based on nothing but power."

"Bull shit." I knew that wasn't true. He'd betrayed his entire realm and everyone in it by staying in Tartarus. I'd murdered a lesser devil right in front of him, and yet his lords still didn't know our one weakness, because he'd never reported it. He'd never explained how he'd justified that level of treason. How could anyone justify that? His family, his friends, any lovers he may have had—he'd betrayed everyone in Olympus by keeping my secrets. Alessi was someone who played fast and loose with affection. He was no one's true friend. "Who have you ever been loyal to? How long are you going to keep running around in this maze with me, before you scamper home to your old life? How much more information do you need to gather for the Gods before you're allowed to stop monitoring us?"

"Is that why you think I'm still here?" His laugh was hollow. He ruffled a hand through his soft red hair, and the way each strand fell out of place made me want to smooth it out for him.

Stupid.

"How should I know? Your whole existence revolves around lies and deceit."

Alessi stood next, and he slightly exceeded my height, even with the addition of my horns to give me another inch. He cocked back his chin, putting me below him, and he narrowed his eyes. "You're the Dream Weaver, aren't you? Why don't you sink into my mind and dig through my deepest insecurities and find out the real reason I'm still here? Don't worry, I'll hold still. You won't even have to prey on me while I sleep this time."

Alessi shifted his fingernails into dagger-like claws.

I swallowed and took a step back, not wanting to play with any part of that flame. "If I hadn't done that, we would have lost the war."

"No you wouldn't have." His hand shot to my neck, and he clamped down with his claws to stop me from running. "Because I never would have picked my realm over you." His tone grew in anger and severity with every word. I'd earned that. "Not then, not now, and never in any version of the future. It was you who never trusted me , even when you snuck into my darkest thoughts without my permission, and shared them with your goddamn king. Because you were afraid of what you saw. Because you couldn't make yourself believe that I fucking loved you, and you decided to ruin everything out of denial." He released me and shifted back his nails abruptly. He took a step back, and I stayed in place. "Until the end of time, right?"

I dropped my chin. My heart beat heavy in my scarred chest. Those were the words I'd said to Jericho a thousand times. The same ones he heard me say in the nightmare that I'd built in his mind, using every fear he had to create a dream so vivid, our relationship was never the same.

Those were words spoken between fated devils who could never sever their bond.

"Until the end of time." I uttered back quietly and under my breath.

How could I explain to an angel of Olympus that, when devils are born, we share a soul, and when one becomes king, he takes a piece of each of our magic in a show of control? How do you tell someone who always lived in a world of freedom, that this was a realm of servitude?

Jericho owned me. I knew that. He owned Rai, he owned the Skolexes, the Tree Sprites, and Centimanes. He owned everything in this realm, and so long as he stood atop his throne, he always would.

But even if he had never ascended to rule, he would always be my soul's mate, whether I hated him, loved him, feared him, or condemned him.

Which was why I chose Jericho before Alessi, and why I'd choose him before Butterfly. Because until the spy from Olympus learned to accept that Devils were inextricably linked— that we were incapable of loving only one person, and all of our souls were tied together by forced fate—he would always be disappointed in my choices.

But that was fine. It was easier if he hated me. I couldn't change my lot in life, but he could do anything he wanted, and I didn't deserve to be something he wanted.

By the last second of the Twilight Clock, Butterfly would hate me too. They were both safer maintaining their distance from our realm and its traditions and magic. After all was said and done, it would be back to business as usual. I had more important things to worry about than misguided affection.

"I'm going to go gather some more firewood." Alessi spoke softly, like he was trying to save his voice from breaking. I nodded in silent compliance, because I didn't want mine to either. Then I sat back down on my log, and I sunk my face into my hands. The fire crackled in the quiet night. The Orange Sector was one of my least favorites, but there was no danger outside the jungle. The Cronus weren't so bold as to march in open air.

I glanced over at the bed I'd made for the woman.

Butterfly was curled up in a ball, hugging my fern woven covering like it was her only security. To her credit, maybe it was. I crouched down beside her and brushed her hair aside, delicately enough that I wouldn't wake her.

"Sink into her brain, find her worst fears, her darkest fantasies, and her most painful insecurities." I thought back on those orders as I watched her rest. I wondered what kind of dream she might be having right now. While I was born with the ability to conjure stories in the mind's eye of all humans, rarely did I take the time to oversee content. Humans were by themselves creative enough to not need my constant monitoring. Who had the time to spend with all that nonsense every single day.

Pressing my thumb to her temples, I sank into her mind for only a glimpse. Her dreams were quiet. Peaceful. Like she was too exhausted to conjure much more than recent memories. She thought about Alessi, imagining his touch with more gentle care than he'd shown her in reality. A pang of jealousy hit me in the chest, and I didn't know where that came from.

I couldn't even say who it was for.

I chewed on my lip and pulled out of her mind. It would be so easy to break her right now. If I returned her to the beginning of the maze, disrupted her timing, and made her lose the whole game, she'd at least be safe. Here, she'd be facing off against the Cronus, and even with Alessi and I at her side, I wasn't comfortable with those odds. We were stronger, but they had sheer numbers. So really, I'd be protecting her if I stopped the game here and now.

Protecting her.

I repeated that phrase over and over, trying to justify it to myself.

Protecting her, or protecting myself? Who was I really looking out for in the end? She was an idiot to think me a friend, when all I would bring was her ruin. Alessi had made that mistake. She was doing the same. What was it that made them so quick to trust me? Was there something I was doing to plant those seeds? I didn't deserve constant forgiveness and second chances.

I withdrew my hand and severed any possible connection before I closed my eyes, drew a full breath through my nose, and sunk into my own memory. I placed my hand idly over the scar on my heart, recalling the sensation as my childhood friend carved into me with my own broken horn, deep enough to graze my rib cage.

I could still see the wicked grin on Jericho's face. I could still hear his laughter.

When did I become so fucking sensitive?

I wouldn't betray her yet. I didn't have to be the one to stab the knife in. There were still plenty of obstacles ahead. All I had to do was take a step back and wait, and this whole situation would handle itself.

Shoving my hand through my hair, I glanced back towards the campfire. Alessi had returned with wood. The last thing I wanted to do now was to resume our last conversation, so I hesitated to rejoin him by the firelight.

No, I'd let him take this shift.

I crouched back down, and I laid in the mud beside Butterfly's bed. I rested my head on my arm and my hand atop hers. Her eyes fluttered open despite her obvious and heavy exhaustion.

"How are you doing?" I whispered quietly when she met my gaze.

The lift to her lips was subtle but noticeable. "Better now."

The uncomfortable irregular beat of my heart made my breathing hitch for a second. "I shouldn't have left you alone in the Green and Yellow Sectors." I wasn't trying to help her, but for no explainable reason, I also felt like it was important I say that.

"I was fine." Her smile didn't waiver. Which was especially confusing since there was no reason she should be smiling at all. "Alessi took good care of me." She squeezed my fingers. "But I'm glad you came back."

Stunned, I just stared at her. "Why?"

Butterfly rolled her eyes with that playful look she so often wore. "I already told you. You're my friend."

"My whole job is to slow you down."

"I know." She squirmed a little closer.

"I'm not here to help you."

"I know." She nudged into the crux of my shoulder, burying her head into my scarf. I swallowed, wrapped my arm around her, and gently stroked her back. All instinctive actions, but they weren't affectionate. We weren't actually bonded. It just felt right.

"I'm not your friend." I spoke softly, more for myself than for her.

She tilted her chin up at me, and she held me with her eyes. Then she leveraged herself upward, pulling up by my shoulders, until our faces were in line. That was when she pressed the most painfully delicate kiss to my lips. Her touch was careful and slow, and she lingered against me for long enough to have my heart near exploding.

"I know." Butterfly breathed hot against my lips before she pulled away and settled back beneath my bicep. "You are much more than just a friend." She said before nuzzling deeply into my scarf. She let her eyelids drop, and it wasn't long before her breathing took on the familiar tone of sleep again.

I exhaled slowly through my nose, my mind still reeling.

More than just a friend? I squeezed her more tightly to still the slight tremble buzzing through me. I moistened my lips with my tongue, telling myself it wasn't to chase her lingering flavor. And I forced my mind into pure cognitive dissonance as I closed my eyes to join her in that peaceful dream. A little sleep would do us both some good.