Chapter 16

KNOT

I stayedin town for longer than I’d originally intended. A fortnight had passed since my arrival, and still I had no plans to leave. Not until Natalee agreed to become my wife. Dalton probably thought I’d run into trouble. But if I returned home, Natalee’s evenings would be open to another male. I wouldn’t take that chance.

Jealousy burned through me at the thought of another male lusting after her, let alone touching her, or making love to her. I’d continued visiting her every night and usually stayed until dawn. I enjoyed her company, and I especially enjoyed when she disobeyed one of my commands in bed and I had to punish her. She always obediently draped herself over my lap to accept her spanking, and by the time I finished chastising her she would be soaking wet and ready to be claimed.

Gods, how I longed to make her my wife. But each time I proposed, she vehemently refused. I was at a loss. She seemed as convinced as the townspeople that I would eventually become the town priest, and she refused to prevent me from answering what she believed was my true calling.

Other times, she would mention the Northern Isles and the sister with whom she thought she would live. Her stubbornness frustrated me, but I could be just as stubborn. And persistent.

I would stay in town until she accepted me as her husband. Parcos Glade had mentioned that the traveling judge would be passing through town late next week to perform several marriage ceremonies. I hoped and prayed—yes, I was praying again for the first time in ages—for Natalee’s heart to open to me.

Word had spread that I was spellbound by the newest siren. Everywhere I went, males teased me that I would soon spend my entire fortune at The Sweet Siren. Some who teased me also expressed frustration that they hadn’t been able to spend an evening with Julianne yet.

On several occasions, I’d had to clench my jaw and keep walking, lest I end up in a fist fight. I’d never been prone to violence (the incident with Mr. Foxthorne notwithstanding), unlike my brothers who were both skilled mercenaries, but my desire to possess Natalee drove me past all reason.

A savage need for her burned within me, growing stronger by the day. I couldn’t leave Faircross and return to my mountain cabin. Not now. Not when the entire town was apparently watching and waiting for me to leave so Natalee would be available for new customers.

I tried to ignore the worry that she would persist in her refusal to marry me, but I feared losing her for good.

What would happen when she finally had enough money saved to return home?

Would she leave town without a goodbye?

The thought of never seeing her again made my throat constrict and my chest ache.

“Knot, we need to talk,” Parcos Glade said on a clear blue morning as we worked on a fence together. “It’s about what folks are saying.”

I wiped the sweat from my brow and looked up from the board I was pounding a nail into. “I don’t care what folks are saying.”

“It’s said you visit The Sweet Siren every night. Now, I’m not one to judge, but you need to think about the example you’re setting for the other males in this town. You might not be a priest anymore, but everyone knows you once were, and there are those who think you ought to start holding regular services in the temple, including me.”

“It’s not as if I’m spending every night with a different girl, Parcos. If you’ve heard I’m visiting the tavern every evening, then surely you’ve heard I’m seeing the same female each night, too?”

“Knot, if the other males in this town—married males, mind you—see a priest spending his free time in a brothel, what sort of example does that set? Before you know it, all the married males in Faircross will be breaking their wedding vows.”

“You’d be surprised how many married males show up at The Sweet Siren every night.” I finished pounding the nail in the board and grabbed another one. I hadn’t thought about the precedent I was setting for the other males in town. But I’d never asked anyone to look up to me. If I could go back in time and not get drunk on whiskey and spill my secrets at the bar, I would do it in a heartbeat. Then I could just be a regular male in Faircross and do as I pleased without the whole damn town watching and judging and waiting.

“Knot, I’m asking you as a friend to reconsider your actions. I’m worried about you. You’re headed down a path of debauchery from which you may never return.”

I tossed the hammer into the grass and faced Parcos. “I want to make her my wife. The siren I’ve been visiting.”

“It’s Julianne, isn’t it? The female you’re infatuated with? Let me tell you something, Knot, that woman is no good. She’s trouble. She already tried to lead Angus Foxthorne down a path of wickedness. Have you heard…”

Rage pumped through my veins. I took a deep breath, attempting to calm myself before I hauled off and decked my friend. “That’s nothing but gossip. Nat-Julianne, Julianne didn’t try to seduce anyone. Mrs. Foxthorne caught her husband harassing the poor young female and kicked her out in the middle of the night, right onto the street. Where else was she supposed to go?” I supposed Parcos had yet to hear about Angus Foxthorne’s unfortunate accident behind the abandoned building on the edge of town.

“If the town had a priest, she could have gone to him for council and perhaps found refuge in another family’s home. But now, now she has become a soiled maiden. There isn’t any coming back from that. She’s bad for you, Knot, and she’s taking you further away from where you ought to be.” Parcos pointed toward the ornate temple spires that towered over the other buildings in town. “That’s where you ought to be. Not at The Sweet Siren. The gods led you here because you’re needed, and you’ll wake up and realize that sooner or later. Sooner, I hope.”

“I’ve asked her to marry me.”

Parcos’s eyes grew wide and he shook his head. “You can’t marry a siren.”

“Not counting her late husband, she’s only been with me. I visit her every night. No other male who visits The Sweet Siren has had a chance yet, and by the gods I’ll not allow any other male to go upstairs with her, even if I have to stay in town for another year until she agrees to become my wife.”

“Just listen to yourself. What would Emalise think?”

My hands curled into fists, and Parcos must have noticed the anger radiating from me because he backed up a few steps. “Emalise is gone. Gone! It doesn’t matter what she would think.”

But Parcos had planted a seed of doubt in my mind. I kept telling myself it didn’t matter what Emalise or anyone else thought of my actions, but when I pictured Emalise’s beautiful face in my mind and saw her green eyes clear as day, doubt after doubt swept through me. Emalise would have wanted me to become the priest of this town. She would have wanted me to end my grieving and faithfully answer my calling to the gods.

“You’ll have to check on your homestead eventually, Knot, and when you do Julianne will lay with other males. I guarantee it.”

Though I’d made an agreement with Madame Sage to reserve Natalee’s nights, even I knew there was no guarantee Natalee, stubborn as she was, wouldn’t take another male upstairs in my absence. Starfires, she might do it in hopes of convincing me to abandon my quest to make her my wife. I reeled at the thought.

I straightened and eyed the afternoon sun. At this time of day, I was usually getting cleaned up and preparing for another night at the tavern.

A gasp, or perhaps it was a brief cry, sounded behind me. But when I turned around, I saw no one.

Well, if I was hearing things, I was clearly losing my mind.

Was it wrong to visit Natalee tonight? Was it foolish?

The worst doubt of all came from Parcos’s point about Faircross not having a priest. If there had been a priest in Faircross overseeing the spiritual welfare of the town, perhaps Natalee would have sought help from the temple before she turned to The Sweet Siren. I thought of the pack of wolves that had surrounded me in my hometown, of how the people in my village had been so certain it was a sign from the gods.

During my time in Faircross, I had gotten to know the townspeople better. The growing families as well as the single miners. The population was steadily increasing, and I couldn’t deny that even I recognized a need for a priest.

What if, no matter how many times I visited her, Natalee would never agree to become my wife? My heart broke at the thought.

I got back to work, holding a board in place while Parcos hammered a nail into it, with neither of us mentioning the punch that had almost been thrown.

Once the fence was finished about an hour later, I returned to my room at The Bluebird Inn. A plan formed in my mind, and as I reached a decision on how to best move forward, I wavered between hopefulness and sorrow. Because I honestly didn’t know how Natalee would react.