Epilogue

The moment I reach the place where all my happy memories started, I drop to the floor. Wiggling my toes in the sand, watching as it falls between my toes. Looking out into the vast openness of ocean I pull my knees to my chest, hugging them close to me. My stomach filled with butterflies because this is the beach, I spent most of my life at. With Maisy.

I can still hear the laughter frolicking between us as we danced together during sunset. The way we always chose here over every other trip together. This was our spot, and where we always messed around. My chest heaves with unshed tears as I bring my knees closer to my chest and drop my chin onto one knee.

Sucking in the air on a wobbly inhale, the realisation that everything I needed to do is finally over hits me. And now… now, I have nothing left. Gazing out where the sand meets the water, I watch as the tide kisses what's left of the sand as it turns into gravel and tiny stones. The seagulls squawk and dance by the wet sand, waiting to grab whatever they can in their beaks.

The ocean breeze caresses my skin as the salty scent in the air hits my nose. I stopped coming here after she died. Stopped doing anything that reminded me of her, of us. And it was there, that I descended into my own personal hell. Into a world where she didn't exist, and I was still here. Walking the planes, waiting for the inevitable of when it would be my time to finally see her again.

Tears slowly slide from my lower lashes, dropping onto my blue jeans and where the spots fall, the fabric darkens. Nothing was the same without her. Food was bland and what was once enjoyable, and fun became a constant memory that she was gone. A constant reminder that I was finally alone. That I had nothing left and slowly but surely, my heart grew hard. Cold and detached itself from every other organ in my chest.

This past year has been the worst thing I've ever had to experience. But right now, as I sit here on the beach where we shared our first kiss, I'm finally able to think about something good. Everything I've done up until now was worth every second. She deserved to have her memory avenged. Thinking about it now, maybe she was far too perfect for this world, for us to both co-exist within it at the same time.

"Breaking news for all those that are listening. Today, police ascended upon the residence of Nathan Danvers. Professor of Criminal Psychology at Brown University…" The news reader relays the information of my recent murder on the radio behind me for everyone to hear. Seems I got out of there just in time. Sniffing, I rub the cuff of my clean hoody over my face, wiping away the tears that haunt my skin.

Thinking back to the night of her seventeenth birthday and how I couldn't stop myself from kissing her natural cherry red lips. I was petrified. I had fallen for Maisy from the moment that I saw her, but back then I didn't know what it meant. The older I got, the more I realised I was actually in love with her.

That she was the most important thing in my life, and I would spend every night dreaming about how she would taste against my lips. I'd spend my days sitting behind her in class, waiting for her to turn around, just to smile at me. The strawberry smell her hair gave off when she would flick her hair over her shoulders is why I love the taste and smell of the fruit.

Tears trace my cheeks and I hate that I'm crying. I hate that memories are all I have left of her. She knew I would avenge her when she left me the diary. She knew exactly what I would do. It's why she left the last page for me. It's why, when I read her declaration of love, my mind, body, and soul cracked into a million pieces. I don't know when I decided to go on a killing spree, I just knew the moment it came into my mind I had to do it.

"We did it Maisy," I smile to myself. Taking in a deep breath, willing myself to calm down. Tears weren't going to help her now. She was already dead.

"I knew you would." Her voice fills the air and I freeze.

This can't be my mind playing tricks on me.

"Never doubted you for a second."

Maisy?

Slowly, I look up. The sun shining so bright within my eyes, I have to squint. Holding my hand up to my forehead, I create a shield for my eyes so I'm able to see more clearly. When they finally adjust to the light and relax, I'm able to look upon the face of my angel. My Maisy.

"M-Maisy?" I stutter.

There's no way she could be here.

No way I'm looking into her beautiful honey-coloured eyes again. She giggles and it's a sound I never knew I missed until right now. "How are you…" I scramble back. "What is-"

"Come here." She holds her hand out and smiles down at me. Her smile is just as perfect as the day I first received one. Sliding my hand in hers the radio host continues behind me.

"Police are wheeling out two stretchers as we speak. The bodies of Nathan Danvers and Jesse Richmond were found within the first-floor bedroom of the residence…"

Standing up, I look down at my girl. My Maisy. She looks just as perfect as the last day I saw her. Her long, poker straight, brown hair flows behind her as the wind slices through it like beautiful ribbons. Her beautiful eyes glisten as the light hits the right angle and shows the different shades in her irises.

"B-but I don't understand, you're s-supposed to be…" I stutter, the words caught in my throat as she lifts a single hand, tucking strands of my blonde hair back behind my ear. "What's happening right now?"

"I came to get you, Ash," she smiles. I always had a few inches of height on Maisy. She was perfect and compact, and I wished most days she was small enough for me to stick her in my pocket and carry her everywhere. "Can't leave you here alone," she shrugs gently. Searching her face, I realise I don't care if this is real or not. She's here and I don't care.

Latching my arms around her waist, I pull her against me. She mirrors me, wrapping her arms tightly around my neck as we stand there for the longest time. Just holding each other. Dipping my face into the crook of her neck, I breathe her in. The smell of flowers, the smell I've missed. "I've missed you," I mumble against her soft skin.

"I've missed you too."

"Wait a moment, I… I understand that a third body has been found inside the house. It seems that the Danvers residence is now the scene of a murder-suicide according to sources at the scene."

Turning my head and stiffening, I stand straighter, looking at the radio. "A third body? There wasn't anyone else there after-"

"Ashley," she whispers. "Ashley, I need you to listen to me."

"The body of nineteen-year-old, Ashley Jane Porter. Sources claim she was found with her wrists cut in the bathroom, clutching the diary of Maisy Anne Lee. The young woman that committed suicide at Brown University last year."

I stop breathing. My lungs frozen on the exhale as her soft fingertips graze my chin. "Ashley, look at me." Everything is frozen in time as the light shines brighter around the both of us. Drowning everything out. I look down at her and she smiles, sadly this time. "I need you to remember."

"Remember what?" I'm so confused, I don't understand what the fuck is going on. "I'm not… I'm not…"

"Baby." The word stills me, and I focus on her and nothing but her.

"Did he, did he kill me?"

"Ashley, baby, he didn't… there was no him..." She holds me closer. "Please remember."

"I… I don't." In an instant the memories come flooding back into my mind as they all cram in one after the other. Forcing their way back into each thought. "When you died, I… Fuck."

She looks up at me, caressing my face. "You had a-"

"Psychological break." I finish for her. I slowly start to piece everything together. Remembering the screaming when my mom told me what happened. I was such a danger to myself; I tried suicide twice. The feel of the padded walls against my fingers as the memory of me in solitary pushes to the forefront of my mind.

The feeling of the drugs in my system, images of me sitting in a circle with other patients. Staring out at the white walls of what was called ‘The Breathing Room.'

"You were there for nine months, remember?" Caressing my face and neck. "You finally got out and the first thing you did… Was run away." She speaks slowly, waiting for me to register it all. "You created him to protect yourself from everything. Shadow was your shield from the beginning."

"He h-helped me to s-survive in there." The memories flashing to the forefront my mind. "Helped me get out of my head, helped stop the pain of l-losing…" The words are barely audible.

My throat constricting tighter as I try to speak. "It's like I woke up one morning and he was just… There." I remember now. "He was always with me. In my mind." The day I was finally discharged from the Ohio Mental institution, that's when I started actually seeing him. Realising now that this whole time it was me. The girls I imagined him murdering, it was just false memories I'd created to shield myself from what I was doing. Attending the university, taking classes, sex with Nathan… it was… all a lie.

None of it existed.

None of it was real.

"I killed myself, didn't I?"

Pushing up on her tip toes, she presses her perfect lips to mine in the most searing kiss. "None of that matters. I couldn't let you go alone." She says against my lips. Slowly, I pull back from her. Sliding my hands around her face, I watch as a single tear cascades down her rosy cheeks.

"It seems as though police have found the diary of Maisy Anne Lee which notes that Joseph Chambers sexually assaulted Miss Lee on countless occasions during her first and only year at Brown and naming Jesse Richmond as her rapist. Ashley Jane Porter's suicide note reveals, in detail, that Nathan Danvers was also a co-conspirator in the cover up of her rape. The note also explains, in further detail, that Ashley Jane Porter, was the sole conspirator in the murders of Nathan Danvers, Joseph Chambers and Jesse Richmond. The location of Marcus Richmond, Jesse's brother, was also stated within the letter."

"It was all for you." My chin quivering as my own tears fall. "I promised I would get them back for hurting you."

She smiles at me, and the tears begin to fall again. From both of us this time.

"As well as the murders of Francesca Lopez and her two best friends Elena Michaels, and Sarah Chambers. Those of which were also part of what was a bullying campaign against Maisy Anne Lee. The parents of both Miss Porter and Miss Lee have been notified."

"Will you stay with me?" I pull her close to me. My heart beating so vigorously I'm afraid it will burst in my chest. Her breath sending goosebumps across my skin.

"Always," I whisper.

"Always," she mimics as she kisses my lips.

END.