Diary entry, Maisy

Ashley,

I write this as my final confession. I had my diary sent to you, mainly because I knew you would know what to do with it. That you would finally see everything. I started writing this after everything got bad for me here. After I slowly pulled myself back from you. I don't want you to cry for me, I had a good life. Up until this point obviously. But anyway, I digress. This isn't an entry to talk about all that. This is a confession, my final confession to you.

I remember the night of my seventeenth birthday like it was yesterday. I remember how I looked at you after you kissed me. After you gave yourself to me in a way nobody ever has before. The way your skin felt beneath mine and how your touch was more gentle than anyone has ever been with me. I know I told you I was drunk and that I didn't remember any of it, but I did. I remembered it all. The way you tasted against my lips when we kissed. A feeling so strong I thought I was going to die on the spot. The way your coconut and vanilla shower gel smashed through every wall I had ever built for myself. You were my best friend, and I was scared, scared that something would go wrong and that I'd lose you for good.

The look on your face when I told you it could never happen again, is something that is burned into my heart for eternity and I'm so sorry I hurt you. You were fine with it, but I knew you weren't. I know that because, neither was I. What I'm trying to say is, I should've told you the truth. Told you that my heart belonged to you from the very beginning. I'm sorry that I was too scared to tell you that I loved you, that I let you go through the past two years thinking that you were my mistake.

That you weren't worth loving because you were. I should have told you every single day that you were the love of my life. That you were, and always will be, the best thing that my wasted heart has ever loved. If I could have a re-do on that day, I would spend every single waking moment telling you that my heart remains marked with your touch. Marked with your sound and most of all, that my body will forever be imprinted with your delicate fingerprints.

I will love you forever,

I will wait for you,

I will always be yours.

Your Maisy.