Chapter Twenty-One

The visit to the candy factory wasn’t as joy inducing as Ness would’ve liked, although he did his best to hide it from everyone around him. Cyrus was fascinated by everything. He kept saying, “You have an actual factory and your own research department,” as if that was so far out of his frame of reference he struggled to comprehend. He spent hours asking questions of the scientists, wanting to know about the sweet making process, and how they came up with their unique flavor profiles.

Ness had wandered around, making a point to speak to each of his workers, who were all pleased to see him. But when one of his tasters asked him if he wanted to try a new combination they were trialing, Ness felt queasy for two hours afterward. Not a pleasant experience. But by the time they headed back to another one of Ness’s houses, Ness ate double helpings of dinner he was so hungry.

Berlin and Greece passed like a blur. Ness typically loved travel and had never had a problem with adjusting to time zone differences or changes in cuisine. Cyrus was the best of company whether they were out and about or when they were curled up in bed together, no matter what town they were in.

But something wasn’t right. And it was only a matter of time before Cyrus picked it up. “Do you need somewhere to shift, darlin’?” He asked as they were having breakfast in a hotel just outside of Athens.

“I’m not sure,” Ness admitted. He looked up and met Cyrus’s eyes. “I haven’t been feeling good for the past week, maybe. Is there any chance I’m…you know…” He willed Cyrus to fill in the blanks, but the man just looked blank. “Pregnant,” he hissed.

“Oh.” Cyrus’s mouth dropped open.

“What’s the oh for?” That was not the reaction Ness expected. “Doesn’t your shark know?”

“Doesn’t your beastie?”

That’s not helpful. “My beastie’s been happy since the first time we had sex. I thought he just liked being with you.” Ness groaned. “I felt sure you or your shark would know. You’re supposed to be attuned to vibrations in the atmosphere. Surely creating a new life would create a unique enough vibration for your shark to recognize it in me. You already have a son. You’ve been through this before.”

Ness hadn’t even realized he’d raised his voice until Cyrus was out of his chair and kneeling by the side of Ness’s. “Hey, hey, darlin’. I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to minimize anything.” He stroked Ness’s arm. “Blade’s mother sent me a note when she worked out she was pregnant. It’s not like she let me go anywhere near her during that time. She was living in a totally different part of the house. But here, lean back a bit. I’ll get my shark to tell us.”

“We’re in a public restaurant.” Ness glanced around, although most people were glued to their phones. That didn’t stop him wishing he’d waited to say anything until they’d got back to their room.

“I don’t give a shit what other people think, darlin’. This is worrying you, so we’ll find out now.” Cyrus’s hand was resting on Ness’s belly. “Honestly, I could’ve probably checked you out last night, but when my hands end up on your delicious naked body, I’m attuned to a whole different sets of vibrations.”

“Cyrus.” Ness was back to hissing, although he knew it wouldn’t do any good. His mate lived to the beat of his own drum.

“How long have you been feeling off, darlin’?” Cyrus asked, moving his hand across Ness’s torso in a back and forward motion.

“About a week. Since we visited the factory. I thought it was caused by one of the sweets one of the researchers asked me to try at the time, but the queasiness has been coming and going ever since.”

“Okay.” Cyrus looked up at him and Ness could see the shark in his mate’s eyes. “Up here” - he moved his hand up to under Ness’s ribcage - “this is you digesting breakfast. Down here.” His hand moved to rest just above Ness’s crotch. “This part of your body is busy getting rid of last night’s food. And here…” This time Cyrus’s hand was resting right above his belly button.

“Here? What’s here?” Ness was shocked to see a single tear run down Cyrus’s face. “Cyrus?”

“Here’s new life,” Cyrus whispered. “New life. Made by you and me. Your beastie had every reason to feel happy darlin’ and it looks like I’ve got a reason to call you Daddy after all.”

“It’s true? You mean it?” But Ness could feel the truth through their bond. “Are you sure you’re happy about it?” He reached out and brushed Cyrus’s tear off his chiseled cheek.

“Don’t let me be the asshole dad I was to Blade or the way my dad was to me,” Cyrus said, his voice low. “Please darlin’, I’m going to need some help to break that cycle.”

“We’ve both got some lessons to learn,” Ness said, blinking quickly as he thought about his lonely childhood. “But we’ll be doing this together, and that’s going to count for something. We’re going to be parents together , promise.”

Cyrus looked at him intently for a long minute, and Ness kept their bond open, showing his truth in every way he could. Suddenly Cyrus jumped to his feet and grabbed his hand. “We need to go back to our room,” he said, dragging Ness out of the chair. “Quick. Quick.”

“Why?” Ness managed to grab his phone that had been left on the table before being towed along. “What’s the hurry?”

“No one but you should ever see me happy dance,” Cyrus said firmly. “No one but you. And then we’ve got to get you back to Arrowtown, ASAP. We need an appointment with Doc.”

/~/~/~/~/

Ness napped on the plane, but Cyrus couldn’t sleep. His mind was cataloguing every mistake he’d made raising Blade. He’d been determined to have a son, someone who could take vengeance for his death if anyone took him out. Honestly, that was the only reason I had at the time. What a damn fool I’ve been.

Blade never knew, and no one else did either, but Cyrus had loved his son from first sight. As soon as he saw that squished up face, that mop of dark hair, and the way Blade screamed in anger every time he thought he should be fed, Cyrus used to grin and turn his head away. His son was strong, and back at that time, Cyrus believed that was the only thing that was important.

I know now how much of a huge fucking mistake I made. Emotions had been frowned on by society at the time, especially among the people he associated with, so Cyrus squashed his and never let them show. And yet look at Blade with Ethan now. That had been a huge eyeopener for Cyrus when he’d first gone to visit. He’d fully expected to see Hal looking after the baby, with Blade just handing out cigars and showing off.

But Blade genuinely loved Ethan. He picked him up, soothed him when he was crying, or made silly faces so Ethan would laugh. Cyrus felt his tears threaten all over again and he quickly glanced down, making sure Ness was still sleeping. He’d never done that – never hugged Blade, not even after he came back from making his first kill. He’d just patted him on the back and told him, “well done.”

I was such a fucking idiot. Although, when Cyrus thought back to his most recent conversation with Blade, he still held with what he said. Times were tough back then. Cyrus never knew when he left the house if he’d be alive long enough to come back to it. He raised Blade to keep himself safe, and the boy had done that.

Looking around at the opulence of his private plane, Cyrus mentally chuckled. I’ve come a long way since then. And while the thought of being affectionate with a baby, toddler, or child a year ago would have had him swimming in the opposite direction at top speed, Cyrus recognized he could and had shown affection to Ethan. He was affectionate with Ness all the time.

Ness is my missing ingredient, he thought fondly, stroking down his mate’s cheek. With him I’ve got the chance to be an actual parent.