Chapter Seventeen

You look very good with him. Ness smiled at the flurry of hands as Hal signed at him. Hal was a handsome lion shifter who’d had the horrific misfortune to lose his tongue at the hands of a now-deceased psychopath. Cyrus had explained that Blade met Hal when Hal was taking a break from Arrowtown, and had gone traveling to find himself. Instead, at the first town he stopped at, Jackson, Hal found Blade instead. They’d had a few ups and downs, but eventually Blade had seen the value in moving to Arrowtown, and now most of the time they could be found around their pool – at least that’s what Cyrus had said.

The visit had started in a flurry of hugs, exclamations of “oh, my gods, another Arrowtown man,” from Blade, and shy signing from Hal, which Ness and Cyrus both understood. But the star of the show, in Ness’s opinion, was their young son Ethan who was at the crawling-almost-walking stage. The young one had latched onto Ness from almost the first minute they arrived, an action that touched Ness’s heart in a way he struggled to describe.

“Do those two often closet themselves off?” Ness asked, tilting his head toward the house where Blade had dragged Cyrus off to after the initial pleasantries were said.

No. Hal smiled ruefully and shook his head. I thought Cyrus would have headed straight for the pool. You haven’t met his shark yet, have you?

“Not yet. My critter is a freshwater beast, so my lake is freshwater, which wouldn’t be suitable for my mate at all.” Ness looked down at where Ethan was sleeping in his arms and almost missed Hal’s reply.

I think Blade’s concerned about you. Not you personally, you understand, but anyone being Cyrus’s mate. Blade’s opinion of his father is not… Hall’s fingers fluttered as if in agitation before he added, not the best. I think things were difficult for Blade when he was growing up.

“You’re not telling me anything I didn’t already know,” Ness said kindly. “Honestly, when Cyrus told me at our first meeting about having a son, I thought he’d bought a baby. It was the way he’d described the whole thing as being mutually advantageous with Blade’s mother – I couldn’t help it. My mind just went there.”

Hal covered his mouth with his hand, making an unusual noise that sounded a lot like a laugh. It was easy for Ness to laugh with him, but then Hal’s face turned serious, and he signed again.

If you don’t mind me asking, how is it, being mated to a gangster?

“Cyrus is so much more than a gangster.” Ness paused for a moment as Ethan wiggled and settled again, seemingly happy to use Ness’s lap as a mattress. “Cyrus told me within an hour of us meeting that he was a made man, a family man, and I didn’t understand what it meant at the time. My buying a baby comment was one example. But at heart, I think Cyrus has had to be a deeply private man to maintain his reputation, but that in turn has meant he’s incredibly lonely. He is so loyal to those people he considers family, to the point of risking his own life and freedom at times.

“I didn’t understand until Cyrus explained a bit about his past, but now I can say with confidence that Cyrus’s morals were formed at a time and through life experiences the likes of which you and I wouldn’t understand because we’ve not lived like that. But underneath it all is the need to protect those around him, and me most of all. What mate is going to object to that?”

Hal nodded, but Ness got the impression he wasn’t so sure. “I can’t imagine life would’ve been easy for Blade growing up. If you’d rather we leave…” he said softly, but Hal was already shaking his head.

Blade has father issues. He had them when we met, and it’s clear he still does even now. I can’t blame him. He spent a lifetime wanting to create a successful life for himself, away from his father’s influence, and that hadn’t been easy for him. But, I think, under it all, Blade just wanted his dad to be proud of him.

“Cyrus is hugely proud of Blade, and you, Levi, and Ethan. We didn’t just come back to Arrowtown to see the doc and check on my house. Cyrus was really keen for me to meet his son. You guys are his only blood family from what I can tell.”

Hal nodded and he was smiling, but his hands flickered yet again. You and I know that. Levi and Ethan probably know it, too. Blade has had a hundred and ten years trying to prove himself, and never believing that he actually hit the mark. It’s hard for him to let go of a way of thinking that governed his whole life until he met me.

“I can’t imagine what that must be like, and honestly, if you’re uncomfortable with us here, we can…” Ness raised his head, listening as the sound of shouting came from inside the house. He could tell Hal had heard it, too. “Here,” he said, standing up carefully and carrying the sleeping Ethan over to Hal. “I’ll go and see what’s going on. I doubt they’re physically fighting, or that it would come to that, but there’s no need for Ethan to have his sleep interrupted.” Without waiting for a reply, Ness strode into the house.

/~/~/~/~/

“How the hell did you end up with a mate? You’re a crook.” Cyrus would like to say he was surprised at Blade’s outburst, but in truth he wasn’t. When he’d said he’d never been a decent father, he knew that was a fact. Not one he could change – the past had already happened. Cyrus just wished his son hadn’t left it until his first visit with Ness to decide to bring him to task for things that happened a long time ago. It’s not like he hadn’t already visited twice before.

“I imagine I got my mate the same way you did yours.” Cyrus knew it was vital to stay calm. “I saw him, tracked him down, introduced myself, and we’ve been happy ever since.”

“Does he know about you? Does he know about the things you’ve done?”

“Does your lovely Hal know everything you’ve done over the years?” Cyrus wandered over, picking up a picture showing Blade, Hal, and Ethan just after Ethan was born. “You were given a chance to have a family of your own, which you grabbed with both hands. You found a reason to live beyond making money, and my heart warms knowing that you have the happiness you’ve lacked in the past. Why is it impossible for you to understand I might want the same thing?”

“What about your precious family?” There was a definite sneer in Blade’s tone. “Are they all going to shut up shop in Vegas, Sicily, and anywhere else you’ve sunk your roots into and be happy living in a shifter town?”

“Definitely not.” Cyrus chuckled as he put the picture back down again. “As my darlin’ Ness reminded me, all of my found family members are human. They have no place in a shifter town. Ness and I have a plane each. Traveling is hardly a problem.” Turning, Cyrus faced his son. “Stop beating around the bush. I raised you to speak your truth. Tell me what is on your mind. Honestly. Man to man. Shark to shark. Son to father.”

Blade came closer, his fists clenched. “You’re going to be living here in Arrowtown.”

Cyrus had already guessed that was Blade’s issue. “It’s possible. Ness and I haven’t discussed that yet.”

“From all accounts Ness has been here since Arrowtown was formed. It’s at his lake where the kids play during the summer months, his plane that was the reason the airport was originally built just out of town. Apparently it was his money that financed the build.”

“I wasn’t aware of that,” Cyrus admitted. “But Ness and I have only been together a matter of days – barely a week. There’s a lot of things we still need to talk over and decide.”

“This is a good town, full of good people.”

“I know that, son. The doc told me about that yesterday when we visited him. He also made it plain that provided I didn’t do anything to hurt the people here, I would be made as welcome as you were.”

Cyrus was missing Ness, and he could feel through their bond that his lovely beastie was getting anxious for him. “Look, Blade, there is no point in my apologizing for the shit childhood you went through. It’s not going to help you.”

“How would you know? You’ve never tried it. In your whole life you’ve never apologized for anything.”

That stopped Cyrus for a moment. “Actually, I have, but only very recently. You are right in that I’ve never apologized to you, and that’s frankly because I never thought I had a need to. But, seeing as it’s apparently important to your happiness now, Blade, my son of whom I am very proud, I am genuinely sorry for all of the wrongs you believed I put you through in the years since you were born. Hand on heart. I’m sorry.” He waited a moment, studying Blade’s face, and then added, “Did that make you feel better?”

“No. Damn it.”

“Was I right? Yes, I was, and that’s because I’ve got five hundred years on you, boy. I know past actions can’t be erased. I’m more aware than most that hurt feelings scar the soul in such a way they can never be fully healed. I still carry the same feelings about my father that you probably feel about me, and my dad’s been dead for centuries, not to mention the word sorry never came out of his mouth. Some shit can’t be changed. But the Fates saw the good in both of us, don’t you get it?” Cyrus pointed in the direction of the window.

“Out there are two good men, making small talk while they worry about us. Two men with golden souls that shine with their innocence and their generous hearts. The Fates believed those men were perfect for us. A chance for both of us to build new lives, decent lives, raising kids with our mates.”

“Don’t tell me you and Ness are planning to have kids? Surely not. Look what you did raising me.”

Cyrus’s patience had its limits. “What did I do? Tell me. You’re tall, healthy, strong, a successful businessman in his own right, with a loving mate and a gorgeous son. What’s wrong with any of that?”

“You sent me to kill a man when I was ten years old. You put the knife in my hand.”

“The same knife that saved your life when you were set on by the Devante family brats when you were twelve because you were getting too close to their baby sister. That was the way life was back then. From memory that same knife saved you four times between the ages of twelve and twenty. Forgive me, oh blessed son, for giving you the skills and the tools to survive your childhood. Your friends, Juno and Frank, weren’t so lucky, were they? But you survived because of me and the things I taught you.”

“I wouldn’t have had to kill anyone if it hadn’t been for the life you were already living. If you’d lived among decent folk…”

“What did you know about decent folk? For fuck’s sake, you were raised in a village on an island, not a country estate in merry old England. You were raised to survive and thrive, and to me, that was more important than anything else. And guess what, you’ve done that. So tell me again how wrong I was.”

“Ness isn’t going to understand your skewed view on life.” Blade snarled. “He’ll see through you in an instant.”

“My Ness…”

“Cyrus, no.” Ness’s voice coming from the doorway had both men turning. “You don’t owe Blade an explanation of how you lived your life, and while I believe Blade owes you an apology for his disrespect, now is not the time. It’s time to leave.”

“Ness, you don’t understand what this man put me through growing up,” Blade said urgently.

“I understand more than you know,” Ness said calmly. “I do believe, when you stop seeing the past through your own narrow prism and start seeing what life was like back when you were born, you’ll understand better as well. I am not saying it is right or wrong, but the past is what it is, and you need to resolve your differences because both of you are living lives that are very different now. But as I said before, now is not the time.

“Cy, babe, I need you to call for your plane, seeing as mine is being used. I still want to meet your lovely shark, and as I don’t feel comfortable infringing on Blade and Hal’s hospitality a moment longer, we’ll fly somewhere else. Blade, tend to your mate and son – Hal is worried about you.”

“But he…” Cyrus and Blade both spoke together and in that moment he realized how much Blade was like him. We both want to be right.

“Now, Cy, and you too, Blade. It was nice meeting you, and I truly appreciated spending time with Hal and Ethan. You have a family to be proud of, but if you’ll take a word of advice from someone who is far older than you and your father put together – there comes a time when you let go of the past and move forward. Everyone can change if they have the right incentive. You’ve already proven that, Blade. But doing that doesn’t give you the right to take the same chances away from your father, no matter what he’s done in the past.” Ness held out his hand. “Cy are you coming?”

“Yes, darlin’.” Crossing the room, Cyrus took his mate’s hand and followed him out of the house, stopping for only a minute to give Hal a hug and brush his hand over Ethan’s hair before they went out to the car.

They were on the road, heading back to Ness’s house before Cyrus said, “I feel I should apologize, but I’m not quite sure what for.”

Ness glanced at him and then back at the road. “I’m sure your chat with your son has been a long time coming. He’s just being protective of his family and what he perceives as his territory, the same as you are of me. You’ve taught him well in that regard.”

“I did think he would be happy for me, finding a mate just like he did. That’s usually grounds for a celebration.”

“I hate to mention it, hon, but my family isn’t going to welcome our mating either,” Ness said with a grin. “And they’ve been known to hold a grudge a lot longer than your Blade will. How many times have you visited Blade over the years?”

“Only twice, both times since Ethan was born. My boy was always trying to build a successful business without gangster connections, so I did my best to stay out of what he was doing. Not always easy for me,” Cyrus added. “You don’t worry that when we have kids, that I’ll ruin them too, the way Blade believes I ruined his life?”

“I’d probably be happier if our little one was apprenticed with Jimmy the carpet layer than learning how to use a knife to kill a man at ten years old, but that’s because being a carpet layer is a useful skill, in my opinion. There’s more call for that type of trade. But there’s a huge difference between when you raised Blade and how we might raise our little one. And I’m not just talking about time and the culture at that time.”

“You’re talking about your influence, aren’t you?” Cyrus was delighted because he knew he was right. “You’d never teach a boy to kill at aged ten, oh, and I bet you’ll teach them to read and write from the moment they can use a device.”

“Probably, although a paper and pen are better if you want them to be able to write nicely.” Ness gave him another one of those glances again that always seemed to make Cyrus feel special. “Between your life experience and mine, no one will be able to say any child of ours wouldn’t grow up to be well-rounded. But enough about kiddies. I want to meet your shark. Where’s your favorite place to shift?”