Chapter One

“Doc, please. Come on. I’ve been going through this for ages, and all you keep telling me is cryptic shit that doesn’t make sense.” Farness Bonham Duncan, known to his friends as Ness or Nessie, ran his fingers through his auburn hair, the frustration that he’d been feeling for what felt like forever bubbling up inside of him yet again. There were times it got so bad it made it almost impossible for him to speak, and this was one of those times. He was so overwhelmed and tired of feeling like he had no control over his body.

Doctor Nathan Faraday, known to everyone simply as Doc, seemed equally frustrated although he was better at hiding it. “I don't understand why none of your kind ever explained to you the facts of life and the differences you might go through during your lifecycle, as compared to other shifters. Your kind is exceptionally rare, that’s a given. But that is even more reason for any of them to understand the importance of passing the information on to their younger generations.” Doc was an old shifter as far as shifters went, but nobody was as old as Ness in the small shifter town known as Arrowtown.

Put simply, the reason why Ness was in Doc’s office in the first place was that for the first time in his more than three-thousand-year existence, he was having trouble coping with the day-to-day functions of life.

He’d get on his plane and then his animal side would decide he wanted to stay home.

He’d go stomping down the street as if he had somewhere to be, but after two minutes Ness would realize he had no idea of his destination and usually ended up at the bar or the bakery.

He’d forget what he was saying during meetings, and his dick, that had been a perfectly compliant part of his anatomy for centuries, appeared to have a life of its own.

None of those things had ever happened to him before, and being a sensible man, Ness went to the doctor. And he kept going to the doctor until the point where it could be considered harassment. At least, that’s what Doc was likely feeling, not what Ness felt himself. He just wanted answers.

“Look, Ness. I’m not being cryptic, I’m just not sure what you want me to say. I can’t be more blunt. There’s nothing wrong with you. I realize what you’re going through is frustrating right now. But all of the symptoms you’re describing - the agitation, the restlessness, the constant boners…”

How Doc managed to say that with a straight face, Ness had no idea, but he felt his own cheeks flush at any reference to his crotch region.

“The symptoms you’re experiencing are all your body's way of signaling that you are ready to start finding a mate or a bond partner. It’s all perfectly natural – nature’s way of ensuring a species survives. That’s why you have the urge to copulate, or to have sex, which is what most shifters instinctively feel when they get to this stage of their development.”

“I know all about randy shifters when they’re young. I have no doubt regular shifters are happy to copulate their way through their teenage years and no one seems to have an issue with that,” Ness interjected. “This is different. It has to be. What I’m going through should not happen to someone who measures their age in the thousands of years. It’s undignified.”

“But clearly for your species, these symptoms are perfectly normal regardless of your age,” Doc explained patiently. “You didn’t feel like this at all when you were an actual teenager, did you?”

“No.” Ness shook his head. “I was studying with my father from the time when I could walk, learning about trade and bartering. I was an only child, very common for our kind, and my parents wanted to make sure I could be independent from a young age.”

“There you go. Going through puberty is a natural part of every person’s development, even if for you, it’s not on the timeline most shifters experience. Your body is gearing itself up to procreate. That’s why you keep thinking about sex.”

“I don’t,” Ness muttered. He wasn’t going to mention he didn’t have a clue how that worked, and he wasn’t sure he wanted to know. His parents’ warnings from when he left home still rang in his head centuries after the fact.

“That’s why your dick is hard for no apparent reason,” Doc carried on, clearly ignoring Ness’s comment. “At the moment a stiff breeze or seeing someone eat ice cream will probably set you off. That’s just the way this phase of life is. It will continue to be that way until you start letting off some steam – one way or another. These feelings do settle down for everyone eventually, and they will for you, too.”

“But when?” Ness complained. “When do they start to settle down? When does a person start to feel normal again?”

“That I can't tell you because none of your kind have ever been very forthcoming and documented your species life cycle for me to reference,” Doc said. “Believe me, I’ve checked every database known to shifters. I’m not saying anything bad about your forefathers. It’s likely most of your kind alive today were born before medicine became accepted in fact.” Twiddling his pen, Doc asked, “Is there any chance you can speak to somebody, your parents perhaps, or a relative, who could give you a better idea of how long these symptoms typically last?”

“I tried that after my last visit here,” Ness said, his cheeks heating to the point he was sure they were glowing as he recalled that pointless conversation. “I’d barely managed to get a list of my symptoms out and all I got was laughter from my father. Then my mother informed me that the issues I was asking about were not considered polite conversation and I should have more control over myself than to ever mention any discomfort in public. After that, I called my uncle on my mother’s side, and basically said I wasn’t feeling good. He asked me how old I was, I reminded him.” Ness sighed. “He laughed, told me to have fun, and hung up on me.”

Doc looked like he was trying to hide his own damn amusement. “All right then. So clearly you've come from a more puritanical branch of being than most shifters and that must be frustrating for you, too. I’m sure you’d rather hear about your kind’s procreating methods from someone with direct experience in those matters. All I can tell you is what I’ve been saying all along. What you’re going through is normal for you.

“The fact that you are going through puberty at your age is simply a byproduct of the way your species evolved. You are so exceptionally long lived when compared to other shifter types, that over the thousands of years your bodies have evolved for some reason in such a way that puberty, which most people go through in their teenage years, has been put off for a considerable length of time. A reason, I might add, that might not even apply in the modern world. But that evolutionary trait still exists. Remember too, that being a non-furry shifter, it is possible for you to be the one who could get pregnant, which I am sure you are aware if your partner turns out to be male.”

“Really?” Ness’s eyes widened. “I don't have anything against male on male partners,” he said quickly in case Doc got the wrong idea. Doc’s relationship with Deputy Joe was an integral part of Arrowtown lore. There were countless other male-male matings in town as well. “It's just I never thought I would get pregnant either. I think I’d worry I didn’t have the right bits.”

“I thought the same thing, and yet it all works out in the end. Besides, at the moment I think we're putting the cart before the horse. You don’t have to concern yourself with that right now. What you’ve got at the moment is a dick with nowhere to go, alongside the frustrations that might bring, and hormones your body is getting used to. In my experience with humans and other shifters, their hormones seem to settle down in about three or four years, once they move into adulthood.”

“Three or four years?” Ness pounded the bed he was sitting on with his fist. “I can't put up with this for that long. My brain is complete mush. I have no idea what I’m doing. One minute I'm on a plane, then I forget where I was going. I go to a meeting, and I can barely function or even speak straight…”

Doc held up his hand, stopping what would’ve probably been a lengthy rant. Gods. Mother was right. I have to get myself under control.

“Have you ever considered that maybe you should just have sex with someone? You're an attractive man. I’m sure you get no-string type offers all the time. Just accept one of them. Once you’ve gone through your first time, and okay, there might be a bit of embarrassment because it is for most of us for our first time, but after that it will get easier. The release would help your agitation.”

“Our kind do not have sex outside of mating. It's too risky.”

Doc frowned. “Risky how? Physically, in your human form, you're no different from any other shifter. I wasn’t suggesting your beastie give sex a try. Why should it be difficult for you?”

Swallowing a lump in his throat at the very idea, Ness tried to explain. At least the doc wasn’t outright laughing at him. “Our beast is very large, therefore our strength in our human form is very intense. It requires - at least from what I've heard in those odd raucous stories overheard during occasional family gatherings - an awful lot of control to be able to engage in those types of activities and not hurt anyone. Right now I rip my pants trying to get them on in the morning, I’m so fumble fingered. I wouldn’t trust myself…” he trailed off. Doc was shaking his head.

“Believe it or not, a person's animal size has very little bearing on the amount of strength or force a person might exert when they're having sex.” Doc probably thought he was being reasonable, but Ness had heard some horror stories when he was growing up, and he wasn't inclined to listen.

“The thing is,” he said firmly, determined to get Doc to see having sex with a non-mate was out of the question, “if any of the stories I have heard are remotely true, even one tiny percent of them, the possible danger to another person…”

Doc held up his hand again. “I can see you don't want to heed that particular piece of advice and that's fine. I am not going to insist you go against what you believe are valid fears. No one should ever be forced to have sex for any reason if they don’t want to. You are hormonal. Your body is moving into the next stage of your development. It takes a while, but your body will adapt.

“In the meantime, I suggest masturbating, working out at least once a day, and keeping busy will also be helpful. If you’re forgetting things, then keep lists and maintain a daily routine because that will help as well. Spending time in your shifted form, especially because you are so big, will also use up a lot of energy, and that in turn will reduce the anxiety and frustration you’ve been feeling in your human form.”

Ness nodded. Those were good ideas and things he could do.

“I can give you a shifter-safe sedative if you like, something to help you sleep if that’s an issue.”

“I don’t want to take anything unnecessarily. I just need for this phase, this stage of my development as you call it, to be over so things can get back to normal.”

Doc chuckled. “In the grand scheme of things, five years is barely a blink. Are you heading out of town again?” He pointed to Ness’s overnight bag.

“Yes.” Ness sighed. “At least my beastie will get a swim while we’re away this time. I’ve got to make a flying stop in Nevada to sign some papers, then onto Scotland to do my bit to keep our legend alive up there.”

“You’re kidding me. There really is a Loch Ness Monster?”

Ness shrugged. “It was my granddad’s idea. None of us have lived in the loch for decades, but the people there rely on tourists for their income. Everyone in the family takes turns. I’ll be up there for three to five days, swim in the mornings and late evenings, giving any of the believers a chance to get their blurry photos, then onto…damn, I can’t remember what I’ve got to do after that, but I’m sure there’s something.”

“I actually think that’s a really cool thing to do. I remember reading when paranormals came out that there was a big hue and cry that the Loch Ness Monster must’ve been a shifter, which was why none of the scientists with their submarines and drones could ever find one, but none of the locals there wanted to believe that.”

“The problem is when the paranormal world did reveal itself their presence explained a lot of the legends non-paras seemed to love.” Ness planted his feet on the floor and stood up, picking up his bag. “Some people, they miss the days when they could tell stories about the mysterious shapes they saw in the night sky or on a loch when it’s covered in mist, without some random shifter or something else holding up a hand and saying ‘That was me, guys. Sorry.’ They like the mystery. My family and I do our little bit to keep that one particular mystery alive.”

“I’ll keep an eye out for the news articles.” Doc laughed as he stood up, too. “Safe travels. I’m sure we’ll see you back here when we do. In the meantime if anything else happens, you’ve got my number. Just keep busy and keep yourself open to the idea your mate could be just over the next horizon.”

Ness was on his way to the door, but he stopped. “Why would you say something like that? Have you added being a seer as one of your doctor’s skills?”

“Nothing like that.” Doc laughed. “It’s just that in my experience our animal sides seem to have a sixth sense about a lot of things, including meeting a mate. With your body on high alert like it is, maybe your beastie is readying you for the idea that your mate isn’t far away.”

“Well, they don’t live in Arrowtown, that’s for sure. I know everyone here.”

“Which is why it’s a good idea you travel so much.” Doc grinned. “Maybe a sweet lady Nessie will already be at the loch when you get there.”

Ness snorted as he shook his head. “If that’s the case it means I’ve got my roster dates wrong. Any lady up there will not be sweet, especially if they catch me shifting. It would either be my mom or my aunt. I knew a long time ago my mate would be a different species.”

Doc was still laughing when Ness left his office, but as he got into his car, parked conveniently outside, tossing his bag in the back, Ness had to adjust his dick in his pants, again. There are times when being a legendary shifter is a plain pain in the butt, and this is one of those times, he thought as he started the car and headed for his private airstrip. Knowing what was wrong didn’t bring Ness half the comfort he thought it would, but it was a start. Face it. I wouldn’t know what to do with a mate if I did find one. I haven’t even been on a date. And that was another anxiety Ness did not need.