39. Ayla

39

AYLA

T he tires of my pickup truck crunch on the gravel as I turn onto the familiar tree-lined street leading to Jamie’s house. My heart races with anticipation, a smile spreading across my face as I think about wrapping Piper in my arms again. God, I’ve missed that little girl.

I pull into Jamie’s driveway and put the truck in park, taking a deep breath. Nervous energy vibrates through me as I hop out and slam the door. The sound echoes through the quiet neighborhood.

Walking up the stone path, colorful flowers burst from the beds on either side, their sweet fragrance floating on the gentle breeze. I climb the porch steps, the aged wood creaking beneath my boots.

I knock on the door, and it doesn’t take long for Jamie to answer, Piper in her arms. My face widens in a smile, as I reach out for her and Jamie happily puts her in my arms. I immediately, start cooing at her, shocked by how much I missed her.

Glancing up, I see Jamie leaning against the doorframe, a soft smile on her face as she watches our reunion.

“Thank you for watching her,” I thank Jamie.

“You don’t have to thank me. I enjoy it. She’s a good baby. I hope mine is too.” She rubs her stomach, which seems to have gotten even bigger since the last time I’d seen her almost a week ago.

“How’s that baby treating you?” I ask.

She sighs. “I’m tired all of the time, and I can’t walk but maybe a few steps before my legs feel like they’re going to give out.” I laugh, looking at her smile. “Come in, come in. Let’s talk.”

Jamie ushers me into the cozy living room, where I sink onto the plush sofa. Piper clambers onto my lap, her little hands patting my cheeks.

Jamie appears with two steaming mugs of coffee, the rich aroma wafting through the air. She hands one to me before settling into the armchair across from us.

I take a sip, the smooth, slightly sweet flavor washing over my tongue. I’m not usually a fan of coffee, but this is surprisingly good. Is there anything that this girl can’t do?

“So,” she says, her tone light but her gaze sharp. “How’ve you been holding up? Really?”

I hesitate, glancing down at Piper, who’s now playing with the pendant on my necklace. “It’s been... a lot,” I admit, my voice barely above a whisper.

Jamie nods, understanding etched into her features. “I can only imagine.” She leans forward, resting her elbows on her knees. “You know I’m here for you, right? Whatever you need. Just because you haven’t known me long doesn’t mean that I don’t consider us family.”

Tears sting my eyes at her sincerity. She’d probably be a better sister than the one I was born with. “I appreciate that Jamie, seriously.”

“So,” she begins, her voice soft yet probing, “how are things with the guys? Clay, Teller, and Kip?”

The question hangs in the air, heavy with unspoken implications. I take a deep breath, trying to steady the sudden racing of my heart. How do I put into words the tempest of emotions swirling within me? The longing, the confusion, the fear?

“It’s complicated,” I finally admit, my gaze fixated on the ripples in my coffee. “But I think...” I pause, the words sticking in my throat. “I think I’m in love with all three of them.” The confession tumbles out in a rush, leaving me feeling exposed and vulnerable.

Jamie reaches across the table, her warm hand covering mine. “Oh, honey,” she murmurs, her eyes shining with understanding. “That’s a lot to process.”

I nod, blinking back the tears that threaten to spill over. “It’s just... it’s so intense, you know? The way they make me feel, the way they look at me like I’m the only person in the world.” A shaky laugh escapes my lips. “It’s overwhelming.”

“I can only imagine.” Jamie gives my hand a gentle squeeze. “But you know what I see when I look at you with them? I see a woman who’s finally allowing herself to be loved, wholly and completely.”

Her words strike a chord deep within me, resonating with a truth I’ve been too afraid to acknowledge. “I’m scared, Jamie,” I whisper, my voice cracking. “Scared of letting them in, of getting hurt again.”

“I know, sweetie. But you can’t let fear rob you of something beautiful.” She leans back, her expression thoughtful. “Those men adore you, anyone can see that. And I think, deep down, you know they’d never intentionally hurt you.”

I nod, a small smile tugging at my lips. “They’re pretty amazing, aren’t they?”

Jamie grins. “They certainly are. And you deserve nothing less.”

A comfortable silence settles between us as we sip our coffee, the rich aroma filling the air. Jamie’s gaze drifts to the framed photo on the mantelpiece—a candid shot of her and Tank, their eyes locked and smiles wide. A wistful sigh escapes her lips.

“I loved him deeply, and I miss him every day,” she shares, her voice tinged with emotion. “If I’d known he was going to die so soon, I wouldn’t have wanted to spend a single moment apart from him.”

My heart aches for her loss, for the love she had and the future stolen from her. “I’m so sorry, Jamie. I can’t even imagine...”

She shakes her head, a sad smile on her face. “Don’t be sorry, sweetie. We had a beautiful life together, and I cherish every memory.” Her eyes meet mine, a fierce intensity burning within. “That’s why I’m telling you this. Life is too short to hold back. If you love them, you should tell them. Don’t wait for the right moment—create it.”

Her words hit me like a tidal wave, the truth of them washing over me. I’ve been so focused on protecting myself, on guarding my heart, that I’ve forgotten to truly live. To love.

“You’re right,” I breathe, my voice barely above a whisper. “I can’t keep running from my feelings. I need to be honest with them, with myself.”

Jamie reaches across the table, her hand covering mine. “You’ve got this, Ayla. Trust your heart. Trust in the love you share with those men.” A flicker of concern crosses Jamie’s face as she settles back into her chair, her eyes meeting mine. “There’s something else you should know, Ayla. It’s about Teller.”

My heart stutters in my chest, a sense of unease creeping up my spine. “What is it? Is he okay?”

Jamie sighs, her fingers absently tracing the rim of her coffee mug. “He hasn’t been eating much since you’ve been away. I’ve been taking him out to lunch just to make sure he’s getting something.”

The weight of her words settles heavily in my stomach, guilt and worry intertwining. I know Teller, know how he retreats into himself when he’s struggling, pushing away the very things he needs most.

“I had no idea,” I whisper, my voice trembling. “I should have been here. I should have?—”

“Hey, none of that,” Jamie interrupts gently, her hand reaching out to squeeze mine. “You needed time, Ayla. Time to process, to heal. Teller understands that even if he was hurting.”

I nod, swallowing past the lump in my throat. “I just hate the thought of him…”

“It’s not because of you, sweetie. It’s because he loves you, deeply and completely. And when you love someone like that, their absence is felt in every fiber of your being.”

A mischievous glint sparks in Jamie’s eyes as an idea takes hold. “What if you and Piper surprised him? I think it would really lift his spirits, especially since he’s been stressed at work,” she suggests, her enthusiasm infectious.

My heart leaps at the thought, a grin spreading across my face. “That’s a great idea!” I exclaim, already picturing Teller’s reaction. The way his eyes would light up, the way his strong arms would wrap around me, holding me close.

Jamie claps her hands together, mirroring my excitement. “Perfect! Go pick him up some of those roast beef sandwiches he likes. Nothing better than having the person you love bring you a sandwich.”

I repeat her words over and over again in my head…person you love, the truth becoming increasingly clear to me.

Teller loved me, and I loved him.