38. Ayla

38

AYLA

I stir awake, disoriented and groggy. It takes a moment for my surroundings to come into focus in the darkness. The first thing I notice is the heat - a stifling warmth enveloping me from all sides. As my senses sharpen, I realize the source...Clay, Teller and Kip, their masculine forms tangled around me amidst the sheets.

Sweat beads on my skin, glistening in the moonlight filtering through the blinds. I’m acutely aware of every place our bare flesh makes contact. Clay’s muscular arm draped heavily over my waist. Teller’s stubbled cheek resting against my neck, his breath tickling my ear with each exhale. Kip’s leg hooked casually over mine, pinning me in place.

My pulse quickens as flashes of memory resurface - wandering hands, heated kisses, gasps and sighs of pleasure. I feel a rush of warmth spread through my body, coloring my cheeks. Part of me wants to stay here, wrapped up in them.

But the rational side of my brain takes over, noting the claustrophobic heat, the sheen of perspiration on my skin. I need air, space to cool off and collect my jumbled thoughts. Slowly, carefully, I attempt to extricate myself from the octopus-like tangle of limbs without disturbing them. I have to move slowly and like a gymnast move my body in order to finally stand up.

As I ease away and glance back, a smile tugs at my lips unbidden. Despite the suffocating warmth, there’s also an undeniable sense of comfort, even rightness, waking up ensconced by these incredible men. Protected. Cherished. Like I belong.

I tear my gaze away and slip silently out of the room, a mix of exhilaration and anxiety swirling inside me. The enormity of what’s developing between us, the intensity of my feelings, is both thrilling and terrifying.

Padding into the kitchen on bare feet, I retrieve a glass and fill it with cold water from the dispenser. The chill against my palm is a welcome shock to my overheated system. I gulp it down greedily, the icy liquid soothing my parched throat.

In the stillness of the house, I take a moment to just breathe. To exist in the quiet and let my racing thoughts settle. Moonlight filters in through the window, bathing everything in a luminous glow. The hum of the refrigerator and the distant sound of crickets create a strangely peaceful ambiance.

I rest my elbows on the cool marble countertop and realize I’m smiling to myself like a fool in the dark. Whatever this is between Clay, Teller, Kip, and me - it’s unlike anything I’ve ever known. Scary, in the best possible way. Like standing on the edge of a cliff, heart in your throat, and choosing to jump... trusting they’ll be there to catch you.

I almost laugh out loud, giddy and overwhelmed. What am I getting myself into? Can I really handle this - not just the physical aspect, but the emotional intimacy? Baring my scarred soul and trusting them with the most vulnerable parts of myself?

But even as the doubts creep in, of maybe I’m in over my head, and I’m going to be left behind, I know deep down... I’m already in too deep to turn back now. Whatever the future holds, I’m all in. No regrets.

I turn around, glass in hand, ready to head back to bed - and nearly jump out of my skin. “Jesus!” I gasp, my heart leaping into my throat as I make out Clay’s silhouette in the doorway.

He chuckles softly and steps into the moonlight. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you,” he murmurs, voice husky with sleep. “I woke up and you were gone. Just wanted to make sure you were okay.”

My pulse is still racing, but now for an entirely different reason. Clay looks unfairly gorgeous, hair adorably rumpled and eyes heavy-lidded. The sight of him sets off a flurry of butterflies in my stomach.

“I’m fine,” I assure him, setting my glass down with a shaky hand. “I just... got too hot. Needed to cool off for a minute.”

One corner of his mouth quirks upward and he raises an eyebrow. “Can’t imagine why,” he teases, moving closer until he’s standing right in front of me. “It’s not like you were sandwiched between three grown men or anything.”

I feel the heat creeping up my neck, no doubt turning my cheeks a vivid pink. “Yeah, well,” I mutter, trying to play it off. “You guys are like human furnaces.”

Clay huffs out a laugh and reaches past me to open the fridge. The brush of his arm against mine sends a shiver down my spine that has nothing to do with the burst of cold air.

“Want some juice?” he offers over his shoulder. “Might help you cool down.”

I shake my head, even as I press my thighs together against the pleasant ache building between them. “Nah, I’m good with water. Thanks though.”

He nods and straightens up, a carton of orange juice in hand. For a moment, we just stand there in the dark kitchen, eyes locked, air practically crackling with tension.

“Come on,” he murmurs, taking my hand. “I want to show you something.”

Curiosity piqued, I let him lead me out of the kitchen and down the dark hallway. His strong hand engulfs mine, warm and reassuring. We pass the other bedrooms, their doors shut, only the soft sound of breathing emanating. Where is he taking me?

We stop at the end of the hall in front of the guest bedroom. My brow furrows slightly. Clay turns and gives me an eager grin. Then he opens the door and ushers me inside.

I step over the threshold and freeze, a small gasp escaping my lips. The once plain guest room has been completely transformed. Soft, glowing string lights drape the walls, bathing everything in a warm ambiance. The bedding is my favorite shade of sage green, plush and inviting. A cozy reading nook occupies one corner, complete with an overstuffed armchair and side table stacked with books. Artwork I love adorns the walls, splashes of color against the cream. It’s like a haven made just for me.

I turn to Clay, at a loss for words, my eyes wide. He’s leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed, watching me with a soft, slightly nervous smile. “Do you like it?” he asks quietly.

I shake my head, trying to find my voice. “I...I love it,” I breathe. “When did you...how did you...?”

Clay chuckles and steps closer. “We worked on it while you were gone.” His eyes sparkle in the twinkling lights. “I hope it feels like your own special space here now.”

My throat tightens with emotion as I look around the room again, taking in all the thoughtful details. They put so much care and effort into this, just for me. After feeling adrift for so long, it’s overwhelming to be surrounded by such love. By a real home.

I turn back to Clay, a shaky smile on my face, eyes shimmering. “Thank you,” I whisper hoarsely. “It’s perfect. I don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t need to say anything,” Clay murmurs, opening his arms. I step into them gratefully, burying my face against his sturdy chest as his arms enfold me. Wrapped in his embrace, in this room that is so wholly mine, I finally let myself believe that I belong. That I am cherished, and safe, and home.

A sudden excited bark makes me jump, pulling back from Clay’s arms with a gasp. I spin around to see Shadow bounding off the bed and racing towards me, tail wagging furiously.

“Shadow!” I scold in a hushed voice, glancing nervously at the door. “Shh! You’ll wake the others!”

But Shadow pays me no heed, prancing around my feet and whining for attention, overcome with joy at seeing me. I can’t help but laugh softly, crouching down to ruffle his silky ears.

“Okay, okay,” I whisper, pressing a kiss to her muzzle. “I missed you too, boy. But we gotta be quiet, alright?”

I can’t believe that I’d just left her when I fled…just so overwhelmed.

Shadow sits obediently, gazing up at me with adoring brown eyes, and leans into my touch as I stroke his head. The familiar warmth of his fur under my fingers soothes me, grounding me.

I really have missed him…missed all of this.

I glance over my shoulder at Clay, flashing him a sheepish grin. “He’s not the best at stealth mode,” I quip.

Clay chuckles quietly and comes to kneel beside us, reaching out to pat Shadow’s flank. “He’s just happy her favorite person is home,” he says warmly, catching my gaze. “We all are.”

My cheeks flush at the open affection in his eyes. At the unspoken promise that this is home now. My home. Our home. Something I never thought I’d have again.

I clear my throat, glancing down shyly as I continue petting Shadow. “I’m happy to be here too,” I murmur, voice thick. “With all of you.”

I look around my newly decorated room and smile and how perfect it is for me. “I really don’t know what to say, how to thank you.”

Clay’s hand rubs soothing circles on my back. “I just wanted you to have a space that feels like yours.” He pulls back slightly to look at me, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear with a gentle touch. “A place you can go to relax and recharge. Somewhere just for you.”

I nod, blinking back the tears that prick insistently at the corners of my eyes. “It’s perfect,” I tell him hoarsely. “Absolutely perfect.”

A slow smile curves Clay’s mouth, his eyes crinkling at the corners. “I’m so glad you like it. I hope...” He pauses, seeming suddenly hesitant. “I hope you know that even though this room is yours, you’re always welcome in mine too. I’d love it if you still wanted to stay with us most of the time.”

My heart flips at the hopeful note in his deep rumble, and I laugh. The way he says ‘us’ with such casual ease, like it’s already a foregone conclusion that the four of us are a package deal.

“I’d like that,” I admit softly, smiling up at him through damp lashes. “Maybe we could rotate? Have sleepovers in each other’s rooms sometimes?”

Clay’s face splits into a wide, boyish grin that makes my stomach flutter. “Sounds perfect to me, darlin’. Kip and Teller will be thrilled.”

He leans down to press a tender kiss to my forehead and I turn my face up to his, fitting my mouth to his in a soft, sweet caress. Everything else fades away until there is only Clay - his clean, masculine scent, the rasp of his scruff against my sensitive skin, the headiness of his taste on my tongue.

In his arms, with his lips moving against mine, I feel cherished. Adored. Like I’ve finally found the missing piece that completes me.

Like I’ve finally come home.

Clay’s strong arms wrap around me, cocooning me in his warmth and strength as our lips move together in a gentle dance.

When we finally break apart, I’m breathless, my heart racing in my chest. Clay rests his forehead against mine, his eyes shining with tenderness as he gazes down at me. “Ayla,” he murmurs, his voice low and intimate. “You have no idea how happy it makes me to see you like this. To know that you feel at home here, with us.”

Emotion clogs my throat, rendering me speechless. I swallow hard, blinking back the fresh tears that threaten to spill over. “I do,” I whisper, my voice trembling slightly. “Feel at home, I mean. For the first time in so long, I feel like I belong somewhere. With someone. With all of you.”

Clay’s hand comes up to cup my cheek, his thumb brushing away the single tear that escapes down my cheek. “You do belong, sweetheart. Here, with me. With Kip and Teller. With Piper. We’re your family now, and we’ll always be here for you. No matter what.”

His words wash over me like a soothing balm, easing the ache in my chest that I’ve carried for so long. The ache of loneliness, of feeling like an outsider in my own life. But here, in Clay’s arms, surrounded by his strength and his unwavering support, I finally feel like I’ve found my place.

I lift up on my toes to brush my lips against his once more, pouring all the love and gratitude I feel into the kiss. Clay responds in kind, his mouth moving over mine with a tender passion that steals my breath and makes my head spin.

In this moment, everything feels right. Perfect. Like the pieces of my life have finally fallen into place, creating a beautiful mosaic of love, family, and belonging.

And I know, with a bone-deep certainty, that I’m exactly where I’m meant to be.