Chapter 28

Erhan

Erhan sat vigil at Kleena’s bedside, his eyes never straying from her still form.

The steady beeping of the monitors was a constant reminder of the scare she had given him. Earlier, he had seen her rushing to the queen’s office and had followed her, intending to look at her closer and maybe finally talk.

She had fainted before she could reach her destination, her pallor a stark contrast to the vibrant woman he loved.

What had happened to her? Had something occurred that made her faint? Was the work too taxing?

He touched her face gingerly, his fingers tracing the contours of her cheek.

Why are humans so fragile?

As he sat there, lost in thought, he decided he would talk to the queen later about Kleena’s work.

Perhaps she needed a break.

He had been terrified when he saw her collapse. The fear that gripped him was unlike anything he had ever experienced in all his years of battle. It was a reminder of how deeply he cared for her, how much he needed her in his life.

He stared at her unmoving body, suddenly afraid something more serious than a simple fainting spell was wrong with her.

What if she has a human disease we’re not equipped to handle? Or something that can’t be cured?

Suddenly feeling intensely anxious, he grabbed her hand, caressing it. His tongue flicked out as if trying to sense her condition.

Minutes went by, and she didn’t move. Her breathing was normal and her face peaceful, but he couldn’t fight off the pit in his stomach.

I can’t lose her, not now!

Erhan sat silently, whispering words of encouragement to her while the routine of the medical wing played out in the background.

He found a small amount of solace in the fact that the doctors didn’t approach him with any bad news. At least not yet.

When Kleena finally stirred and opened her eyes, relief flooded his senses. Their eyes met, and for a moment, everything else faded away.

His relief was short-lived as Kleena’s expression hardened, and she demanded he leave the room. Her words stung and hurt more than any sword wound.

“Kleena, please, let me stay,” he begged, his voice filled with desperation.

“Leave, Erhan,” she said harshly. “I don’t want you here.” Her words cut deeper than any weapon. Every word felt like a personal failure, reflecting the chasm he had allowed to form between them. He had tried so hard to protect her, to give her the space she needed, but it seemed he had only driven her further away.

I shouldn’t have avoided her after our night on Jorvla. I should have told her everything about me.

“Not before you tell me how you ended up fainting.” His words were gentle but demanding.

She glanced at him but quickly looked away. “I don’t know. I guess I didn’t eat enough today, or something.”

“Skipping one meal doesn’t result in a medical visit, Kleena.”

She sighed, her hands fidgeting with the blanket.

When she didn’t respond after a minute’s silence, he cleared his voice. “Are you ill?” Though he tried to remain calm, his concern was obvious.

Kleena looked at him, her expression a mixture of guilt and something he couldn’t place. “No, I’m okay. This was just… I fainted, that’s all. There’s nothing to it.”

Unconvinced, he shifted and sighed. “If you won’t tell me, at least tell the queen. She will be worried when she finds out you’re here.”

She stared at her hands, and Erhan could have sworn he saw tears welling in her eyes.

I hate this tension, this feeling of not being welcome.

Before he could say anything else, Kleena spoke. “Will you please leave now?”

His heart sank. He had hoped she would let him stay if she could see that he really was concerned for her. That he cared.

“Leave, Erhan. I told you I don’t want you here.”

“Kleena, I’m sorry,” he said, his voice breaking. “I never wanted to hurt you. I thought… I thought staying away would be best for you.”

Kleena’s eyes softened slightly, and he saw a flicker of compassion.

Maybe she feels the same way.

In a moment of raw honesty, Erhan began to confess the burden he had silently carried.

It’s time I lower these walls and let her in. Just this once, I think it would be okay to have someone else truly know me.

“I’ve never told you this, but my dam died giving birth to my egg. She was eggbound with her last clutch and I was the only survivor.” His voice broke, his heart heavy with the memories of his childhood.

“I learned about the true events of the day I was born from mean noble children who thought it would be funny to pick on me.”

Kleena listened in silence, her eyes fixed on him.

“Many within the palace… They blamed me. They said I was the cause of her death. Growing up, I believed them. I thought I didn’t deserve love or my own family as punishment for my sin.”

He took a breath before continuing. “As a result, I distanced myself from my sire, brothers, and the palace. I refused to be the prince. How could I when I killed my own dam? I also decided to never fall in love. I vowed that I would not put myself in a position where I could hurt someone the way I hurt my dam. Her love for me killed her, essentially.”

Kleena’s face softened even more, her eyes reflecting a mix of compassion and love.

It gave him the courage to continue.

“I became a cold person, someone who would shy away from deep connections. It took me years to form some kind of relationship with my sire…by then, he had already mated with the new queen.”

Erhan’s face was expressive while he spoke, something not often seen when interacting with him.

“She was kind and caring, and instantly accepted me. It took me years to reciprocate her familial feelings.”

He looked into Kleena’s eyes. “I never intended to fall in love with you, you know,” he admitted. “But I couldn’t help it. You brought light into my life in a way I never thought possible. I love you, more than I’ve ever loved anyone.”

Erhan went silent.

The anguish was palpable in the air when Kleena finally responded, her voice heavy with sorrow. “Erhan, we can’t be together.”

Her words sent a fresh wave of despair crashing over him. “What? Why not?” he asked, desperation evident in his voice. “Please, tell me what’s keeping us apart.”

Her eyes filled with tears, and she turned her head away, unable to meet his gaze. “I can’t, Erhan. Just… Please understand that we can’t.”

“Why won’t you tell me? Is it something I’ve done? Something I can fix?” His frustration bubbled to the surface.

Why does she continue to reject what we both feel, what seems to be our inevitable truth?

“Because you’re a coward, Erhan,” she said bitterly, her eyes flashing with anger. “You avoid your problems instead of facing them. You think sending flowers and gifts will fix everything, but it doesn’t. You can’t just waltz back into my life and expect me to forgive you.”

Erhan felt a mix of frustration and heartbreak.

Something about the way she spoke seemed off, as if her words were forced. He shook his head, refusing to believe she meant what she said.

“Kleena, please,” he begged, his voice cracking. “This doesn’t feel right… I need to understand. Whatever it is, we can face it together. I just need you to give us a chance.”

She remained silent, her tears falling freely.

He noticed that she refused to look at him, and he reached out to touch her hand. She pulled away, though, the rejection stinging him deeply.

“I just opened up to you in a way I’ve never done with anyone else. I…was that not enough to convince you that I care?” Frustrated, he grabbed her chin to make her look at him. “What else do you want me to do? Beg? Plead? Fight?”

Kleena stared at him, her eyes wide. She didn’t look scared but was clearly surprised by Erhan’s passionate reaction.

“I-I…” Her voice trailed off, and he let go of her, his tongue flicking out angrily.

She shied away from him again, hugging her knees to her chest. “I didn’t ask for this, any of it…”

His heart ached, the truth of her statement hitting him hard. “I know. And I want to make things better for you, so please trust me, Kleena.”