Chapter 23Emir

Chapter 23 Emir

She was in my arms, I registered through a haze of sleep. I’d dreamed of us, right there, sleeping side by side in her guest room, my arm resting on her hip. It made sense. There wasn’t anything better to be dreaming about. Sure, we could have both sprouted wings and been able to fly, or breakfast items could have materialized out of thin air, but I couldn’t see that hugely improving reality.

Daylight seeped in through the crack between the heavy curtains, serving as a gentle reminder of the outside world. Janie stirred against me, her breathing shortening as she woke up.

“Emir?” She wrapped her fingers around my arm and my heart expanded.

“I’m right here.”

“You stayed with me.” I heard the smile in her sleepy voice.

She turned to face me. Gazing into her sleepy eyes, I marveled at the absence of pain. Every part of me felt rested, my head light on the pillow. I think she saw the difference in me, because her fingers climbed up to my forehead and her smile widened. “You look different.”

“I feel different. Good.”

Her smile widened, and she traced her finger to the corner of my mouth. “I’ve been so obsessed with making you smile.” She blushed.

She looked so adorable I didn’t even realize I was smiling back until her finger touched my incisor. “It’s magical, you know?” There was a hint of teasing, but also that warmth I’d come to associate with her. Janie gave everything meaning.

“It’s not that I don’t want to smile. I just haven’t had a reason.”

“Oh, Emir.” Her eyes filled with compassion, and she sunk her fingers into my hair and massaged my scalp. “I didn’t massage you last night. That was our agreement. I’m so sorry.”

I wanted to tell her I wasn’t in any pain, but her touch released a sweet sensation, flowing like liquid down my spine, paralyzing my tongue. I wanted to stay right here, forever.

“It’s okay, Janie.” I finally closed my hand around her wrist, holding it down. “You haven’t broken our agreement.”

“I have,” she insisted. “When I checked on Molly yesterday, her eye looked so much better. And I saw you cleaned the stables, too. And my veggie garden looks amazing. Have you been weeding it?”

“I have a lot of time on my hands,” I said evasively. “But it doesn’t mean you owe me anything.”

“But I promised to massage you! And yesterday…” Her eyes darkened.

“Yesterday was a shit show, that somehow turned into the best day of my life.” I leaned in to kiss her. “That’s the part I want to focus on.”

“What time is it?” She lifted her head to peer over my shoulder.

I reached for my phone she was eyeing on the bedside table and raised it to check the time. “Eight thirty. What time is that drone shoot?”

“We’re meeting Gus by the harbor at 3pm. But Aria and Cem are coming to work on the decorations. Or I think Aria is on that and Cem is…”

“Annoying me full-time,” I finished.

She giggled into my chest, then her voice turned serious. “Do you think they’ll notice there’s something between us? Should we tell them?”

“Why wouldn’t we?”

“I don’t know. Because it’s so new?”

“But what if I can’t hide it?” I asked.

My brother would probably take one look at my face and call it.

“Then I guess we have no choice.”

“It might be good to have them on our side,” As much as my brother annoyed me, I needed him onboard. This was going to be a hard sell for my parents.

She bit her lip, her eyes peering at me from behind the strands of hair. “Okay, maybe.”

“So, what time are they coming?”

“At around ten.”

“Which means we have time for…”

“What did you have in mind?”

My gaze fell on her breasts, peeking from underneath the blanket, and I pulled it a little lower, watching her cheeks color and eyes crinkle with a smile. I was already hard, having woken up that way, and more blood rushed in to complete the job. “You’ve taken over my mind, Janie. I dreamed about you.”

Tears sprung to her eyes, making her smile sparkle. “I was worried you’d be too hard on yourself for failing your own standards… I mean, you had it all figured out and you decided we shouldn’t get involved. Your logic was flawless.” She gave a sad chuckle. “I was worried you’d wake up and regret this.”

A smile spread across my face, effortlessly, and I let it. I dropped the phone back on the table and turned my attention on her, enjoying the way her face lit up in response. I’d never get tired of her smile. “I was relying on logic for years but look where it got me. I was in pain. I was miserable. Now I feel… good. How could I regret that? I tend to expect a lot from myself, but I’m human. We make mistakes…” Her eyes flooded with worry, and I instantly regretted my word choice. “Not this! This is not the mistake. I meant what I said last night. Let’s make this work.”

A shadow of fear crossed her face, and I held my breath. Would she accept my change of mind? Would she give us a fighting chance?

“Emir. I can’t see that far ahead. But I want you right now. Please?” Her apologetic voice turned breathy, and she leaned closer, placing her lips on mine. I didn’t need another invitation. I’d stay and love her, for as long as she’d let me. I knew better than to freak her out with confessions she wasn’t ready for, but deep in my heart, I knew what I felt. Something that hadn’t happened in years, something that I thought would maybe never happen again, had come over me like a meteor shower, changing the color of the sky. There was no room for anything else on my mind as I put my hands on her warm skin and my tongue surged to meet hers.

She shuffled closer, skin to skin. The way we fit together left no room for anything and it gave me hope. We kissed like it was Sunday, with nothing else on the agenda, lost in the moment. Nothing felt familiar, even my own body or face. I’d become unrecognizable to myself, but I was willing to overlook anything to stay in that bubble with her.

Janie, out of control, was better than anything I could have captured with my camera. The halo of morning sun in her hair, eyes rolling back, mouth ajar. Her body was controlling mine, commanding every cell.

We made love, losing track of time. Afterwards, she collapsed on my chest, out of breath. “Emir. Your smile is kryptonite. You have to be careful.”

I stroked her hair, inhaling deeply. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

What if I couldn’t keep this stupid grin hidden in public? My family would think I’d lost my mind. They’d ship me away to an institution. A laugh bubbled up in my chest. First a low rumble, like the distant sound of earthworks, slowly turning into an earthquake.

Janie jerked up, staring at my face, blinking.

My laughter settled into a soft chuckle. “You think I’m a miserable, grumpy bastard, right?” I wiped my eyes, shaking my head. “I can’t blame you. I’d forgotten how to feel… light enough, I guess.”

Her eyes misted. “I… I don’t even know what to think of you, Emir. You keep surprising me.”

We stared at each other for a moment, both unable to speak. I could see it in her eyes, the weight of what had happened between us. The implications. There was no going back to what we’d been before, yet we had no words for what existed right now. It was too fresh.

As the waves of pleasure settled into gentle laps, the reality re-entered our world. Janie rolled off me, checking her phone for time. “I have to feed the pigs and check on Molly, let her out…”

She leapt from the bed, and I followed her, finding her camisole on the floor. “I’ll help.”

“Only if you want to. I also need to get new locks and some kind of security system and maybe report the break-in to the police. But I don’t want to turn my home into a crime scene.”

She looked so distraught, standing before me in her underwear, hair mussed. “You don’t have to go to the police if you don’t want to. We can just secure the property.”

“Okay.”

“I’ll call Cem right now and ask him to pick up a few items on the way. We can add a deadbolt to the front door and secure the latches on those sliding doors. How does that sound?”

“I’ll pay him back! But nothing hi-tech or super expensive,” she pleaded.

“Okay.” I had no control over Cem’s spending, but I also knew he’d never accept a penny from Janie.

“Thank you!” Her smile was adorable when she kissed me on the cheek and skipped off to get dressed.