19. Sara

Chapter nineteen

Sara

"Can you take care of the customers this morning, Sara? I'll make drinks in the back until the lunch rush is over. Please?" Bianca begs.

I sigh, folding my hands across my chest.

"This is the third time this week, Bianca."

"I know. I'm just going through a lot with Colton."

Oh yeah. Bianca's got a guy now. Some dude named Colton that she doesn't tell me anything about. If I didn't know any better, I would assume he's a fake, but she insists he's real.

Sure, as real as a figment of her imagination can be.

I sigh, already frustrated by everything. It's not like I want to do this, but there's not much else I can do at this point. I want to help Bianca, even if it means manning the counter for an extra couple of hours.

"Fine, but you owe me."

"Thanks, Sara! I promise I'll cover your next shift. You can go out on a date with your boyfriend," Bianca teases.

"Yeah, true."

I wish that were the case. After riding horses with Robert two weeks ago, his messages have been spotty to say the least. I ask him what he's been up to, but he dodges the question.

I don't even know if we're really together. I want to be, but he doesn't really respond when I ask him about his day. It's weird, especially after how well we got along at the sanctuary. Maybe he's had second thoughts about how much I shared of my dreams and goals. I just don't know.

I've been focusing on my work and on the shelter as well. I've been working to get a couple of animals ready for the fall and winter. Winterizing the sanctuary is important, and I want to keep the place going.

Not only that, but with May's health always hanging by a thread, my time's dedicated to helping her more than anything else. That means that I've been doing everything but dating.

Not that I mind, but still.

Shaking my head, I return back to the present.

"Okay, I'll head out to the counter. But soon you have got to start manning out front consistently," I admonish Bianca.

"I know, I know. Let me just get this last message out."

I roll my eyes, annoyed but understanding. I get that this is Bianca's first relationship, but she could at least care about others for a minute and do her job.

I adjust my black apron and push my brown hair into a messy bun. As I walk out, a throng of customers comes in.

"Welcome, may I take your order?"

I listen to their orders and jot them down. So far, it's been drinks and a couple of sandwiches. Nothing too crazy.

The line thins and clears. The door opens again, and more customers show up. In the back, I see a head of blonde hair.

Wait, is that . . . ?

No, it can't be. That's the woman with the clicking heels from a couple of months back who got on me for the credit card machine. I'm guessing she's here to make my life a world of trouble again today.

I take the orders, keeping an eye on the blonde as she approaches. When the last customer, a tall and portly gentleman named Greg, moves to the side, she stands there.

Next to her is Robert.

I grin, confused by this.

"Robert?"

"Oh, Sara," he replies, looking away like I don't exist.

I look at the blonde-haired woman, confused by what's going on. She's definitely the same Karen from a month ago, and her beady hazel eyes stare at me.

"What are you doing here? Is this a work colleague?"

Maybe they work together. Robert's office is close enough to drive over here. He clears his throat.

"Actually, we—" begins Robert.

"We're on a date. Well, more like discussing work-related topics together," she interjects, glaring at me.

I stand there, processing all this. It has to be some kind of joke, right? I try to keep it together, taking a couple of deep breaths.

Robert can't possibly be seeing another woman. I thought we had something special. It's not like we're dating-dating, but I thought I meant something to him.

"I see," I reply, looking down. "In that case, I'll take your order. I guess since I don't matter, that is."

"Sara, that's not—"he tries to interject, but he is stopped by the blonde's loud voice.

"Robert, did you date her or something?" Maria pointedly asks, loud enough for the entire place to hear.

Our eyes meet. He has one chance to make this right. He can tell this woman that he's off the market and—"

"It's complicated, Maria. Let's just order and then discuss business."

"Of course," the woman named Maria replies, clinging to him once again. The sight of him with her is like a stab in the heart. I hold back tears as I nod. It's complicated he said.

I croak out: "Let me take your order."

Maria looks at the menu and then smiles. The crow's feet are apparent around her eyes, and she's at least a decade older than me.

Is this the type of woman that Robert likes? I close my eyes to keep the racing thoughts from invading me.

"I'd like a number four with a latte with skimmed milk, remember? What would you like, dear ?"

I cringe hearing the "dear." Robert doesn't respond but then looks up.

"I'll do the same."

"Oh, see! You and I are so alike—"

"Okay. The total is there. Just pay, and I'll give you the number," I interrupt robotically. Averting my eyes. Maria pays for their food, and I hand her the ticket. At least the card machine worked this time.

"It'll be brought out when it's ready."

"Good."

She storms off, sitting at one of the tables in the front. I look at Robert, who refuses to move.

"What is this, Robert? Why are you here with her—"

"It's complicated, Sara. We had to talk about something and—"

"So, you brought her here then, as some kind of way to brag. Or maybe to tell me the truth about how you really feel."

"No, Sara, it's not like that—"

"Then what is it?" I interject. "Is she your girlfriend or something? I thought I mattered."

Robert's eyes refuse to look at mine. He sighs, rubbing his temple.

"It's not like that. She's a work colleague, and I'm trying to get a contract signed. It's not that deep, Sara."

"Then how come she's holding onto you like she's your girlfriend?" I ask, the words coming off like venom. "I thought that maybe we had something. Do we?"

Robert doesn't respond. He doesn't even look at me.

"I don't know what to say, Sara. I'm trying to get through a difficult situation right now.

"So, I'm NOT your girlfriend then. I've been chasing someone who doesn't even care about me the same way."

"No, Sara, that's not—"

I can't listen to any of this anymore. I thought that Robert and I might have had something strong and lasting. I shake my head, disappointed at his hesitation.

"I'm a fool for thinking that you actually liked me. Your food will be out in a bit. Hope you and Maria have a nice time."

Without another word, I turn and storm off to the back room. Bianca's there, making the sandwiches for Robert and Maria's table. I grimace, looking at them.

Bianca looks up as she puts on the last topping, some café-special sauce for the turkey club.

"Hey Sara, is everything okay?"

I shake my head. "I need to take the rest of the day off."

"But Sara, we still have a few hours."

"Tell Lukas it's an emergency. I need to leave right now."

I mask the tears, even though all I want to do is cry. How could Robert say what he said with not a single bit of remorse to his words? I'm an idiot for thinking that I meant something special to him.

I thought he cared, but I guess that's all a lie, just like everything else. Bianca nods, not waiting for a response but understanding.

"Okay. If you want to talk about it, we can."

"Right, sure," I respond as I hang up my apron and go to the back room, grabbing my bag and slinging it over my shoulder. I don't care if bills are tight this month. I don't want to stay here, in a place where I'll be disrespected by someone who I thought cared.

I slip out the back door and race toward my old beaten-up car. When I get in there, I let it out.

My head rests on the steering wheel as the tears fall. I don't stop crying. I don't want to.

I'm an idiot for thinking I mattered to Robert, for assuming that I was something special. I shouldn't have even bothered to assume anything like that.

Right now, I don't mean a thing to him. He's moved on, and I'm left all alone.

I guess this is the way things are.