23
T he moment she slams the door in my face every terror and fear comes slamming into me with the force of a freight train.
Losing Imogen, the moment I saw Leera, thinking she was human and would reject me, and now, after everything I've been through, she still might reject me, over INDIA?!
Releasing the deafening roar from my soul should make me feel better, but it does little to numb the venomous fear coursing through my veins.
Benny is trying to console me, but I can't hear anything over the thundering of my heart. My wolf is howling and trying to rip me apart from the inside out.
How can I give her space when I can't breathe without her? I thought I had been breathing just fine the last five hundred years, but I didn't know how wrong I was until she let me hold her.
With the rest of my soul re-intact, I took the first full breath in half a fucking millennium. I can't just let her walk away. I can't let this be all we are. I don't want to live a half-life without her. I can't.
I replay her parting words over and over in my mind. I have to work for her. What kind of work does she want? How much is enough? How much is too much? It doesn't matter, I'll do anything and everything to make her happy. Hopefully, sooner rather than later but all I have is time.
I immediately start planning all the things I can do to show her that while the base of our bond is a fated soul bond, I care about her and will learn everything about her and worship her in every way.
I've never really had to court a woman. I think it's called dating now. As a werewolf, you usually find your mate and that's it. Sure, we spend time together, get to know one another and such, but it's instant. Then having spent the centuries arranged to be married, I don't even know where to start. I do the only thing I can think of, and I search "things that make women happy" in the search engine on my phone.
I don't have her phone number, which is frustrating because I want to text her, just to apologize and say good night. Do I have Slate get her number for me so I can talk to her, or is that crossing a line?
Why does this have to be so complicated?!
"Benny, how do you handle all the human women?" I ask from the back seat, feeling defeated.
He's chuckling before I finish my sentence, "Sorry to break it to you, Boss, but I don't have to work for the women I see. They don't really want anything but to be seen on my arm, so I can't help you there."
He turns serious for a moment while he thinks, "If I found myself in a position to want to really win a woman's heart, though, I would probably start with having Slate run a full background check on them and learn absolutely everything I could about them and build from there."
Well, at least we're on the same page there. I don't think it's acceptable at the human level, but I also don't really give a fuck.
I shoot him a small nod, and he just shakes his head with that stupid shit-eating grin on his face.
As soon as I crash through the front door, it feels so empty. Now that she's been here, her absence is a living, breathing thing. When she was here, it felt like a real home. Without her, it's just another building.
My men are gathered at the kitchen island, waiting for me. "What are you going to do? What do you need from us?" Andrei is the first to ask with a spark of determination in his eyes.
"Slate, I need her phone number and any and all information you can get about her." He raises an eyebrow at my instruction, "I don't care how it looks. I need to know everything about her that I can, she'll tell me the rest as we get to know each other," I instruct, allowing myself a small smile at the thought of learning all about my little mate.
"Eris, Dolos, I want you two to take turns keeping an eye on her when I can't while we're here this week. We have two away games, so also make sure you have someone covering her while we're gone. Get with Benny, he already has something in place. I want to make sure she's safe and that she doesn't struggle with her wolf. If ANYTHING happens, I'm to be alerted IMMEDIATELY." They both nod and walk away.
They may seem like great big goof balls, but they are the top spies of the King's werewolf army in Zabella, and their particular set of skills are invaluable.
"Benny, what I need from you is no simple task. Please don't fight me on this. I need you to run interference with India. I don't want to see her, and I don't want her here at all. The away games will help, but with her father's expectations, I need to figure out how to handle this." He's not happy about it, but he also nods and walks away.
"Andrei, you're with me. As we receive intel from Slate, I need your help making sure I don't blunder this whole romantic human stuff." I hate feeling vulnerable about this kind of thing but I'm man enough to admit when I need help. I'll do anything for her.
Andrei looks like he has something to say but leaves when Slate comes back into the room. "Got her number. Figured I'd start with that so you could contact her. I'll get to work on the rest now."
Snatching the number out of his hand, I pull my phone out of my pocket and add her number to my contacts under My Little Mate. I think for a moment . . . if she sees that, she could think that's all she is to me. So, I change it to Leera for now. We have an eternity for fun little pet names.
I text her before going to our gym to burn off the rest of this tension. It looks like it will be another night of no sleep. Being away from her all week, between her demands and away games, it's going to be torture, but I have to at least try to respect her wishes at some kind of level.