Chapter 37

*Janie*

I couldn't take my eyes off his face as he led me into the room and sat me down on the loveseat, taking one of the chairs closest to it. Even with that initial smile, I was terrified about what he was about to say.

What if he asked for a divorce? What if everyone was right, and this was really the end? There was no way to read his face, not like in the past when the drugs kept him under control, and I didn't have to worry from one day to the next what he was thinking.

"I want to apologize." I think the world stopped. It wasn't a declaration of love, but it might as well be. Ryder was saying sorry to me about something. It didn't matter what it was he was apologizing for; just the fact that he was talking to me so nicely, too, was enough, and he wasn't finished.

"I know I haven't been the best husband, especially since I came back this last time, but I just wanted to get this acting thing right, and I couldn't have any distractions. I see it as a new adventure for the both of us, and I wanted it to be right since I've made a mess of everything else."

What? I had no idea he was thinking this way. "I thought you hated me; you've been so cold. I thought you blamed me…."

"No, no, of course not, it's nothing like that. I'm sorry I made you feel that way. It's just...I've noticed some things about myself once I got clean that I needed to work on, especially with you, with us."

What is he saying? This is like a dream come true. Everyone was up in arms because he was off the drugs; they thought that once he came to his senses, he'd leave me and maybe worse, but I knew that he'd only remember how good I was to him; that was my hope all along anyway.

I wish my dad and Mary were here to hear this, but it'll be just as fun when I call them later to tell them. I never should've doubted myself and the fact that I could get him to love me. I knew Mary was wrong when she said that it was only the drugs and the spells that had won him to my side.

How could I have forgotten how close we had become before the wedding? The fact that we had lied to him even then didn't matter; I was sure that he'd started having feelings for me no matter what came after. I was so happy right now that even the fact that I hadn't had sex with my husband in five years didn't matter. I was sure that was about to change now too.

This is what I had been hoping for, what I'd dreamed of for so long, and here it was. Who cares about what everyone is saying online? When have I ever paid any attention to that crap? Mary was right when she said I'd only ever cared about myself and what I wanted. Why should anything else matter?

"I'm not sure how much you know about Chad Saunders, but he's known to be a family man with very strong values when it comes to family. One of the things he made me promise when he helped get me clean was that I would keep my image spotless from now on. I knew that I'd done a lot of horrible things in our marriage, and I didn't know how to make it up to you, so I needed some time."

Now I get it; maybe that's why his wife had met with Elena. She was calling that bitch off and probably figured out that she was the one behind these rumors that kept floating around about her and Ryder getting back together. I told everyone that song was for me; I was sure of it, but no one believed me.

They all claimed that it was all about Elena, thanks to that little bitch who'd claimed to have decoded the secret messages she said were in the song. It sounded pretty straightforward to me, though, and was all about how much he wanted us to spend the rest of our lives together.

I just knew that Ryder wouldn't be stupid enough to sing about her while married to me, not even without the drugs. He wouldn't want his fans, who he'd gone to such lengths to get to like me, to turn on him. And besides, he'd come back to me, hadn't he? He could've gone anywhere else in the world, but in the end, I was the one he'd run back to.

I can't wait to share that little tidbit either, to see the looks on everyone's faces once they realized that I was right all along and that the beautiful song that everyone was saying was my husband's best was, in fact, meant for me. It was his way of telling me that he was sorry and that he'd never want us to be apart ever.

"Here's what I've been thinking." When he leaned in close and took both my hands in his, I almost fainted. Ryder never touches me; in fact, he'd gone so far as to go out of his way so that we never even brushed up against each other in passing. Now here he was, holding my hands and looking into my eyes.

"I think we need to get away from here. Do you remember that house in the hills that you've always wanted?" I felt excitement burst forth and grow at the mention of the mansion I'd fallen in love with years ago. It was still on the market because of its high price, even in a town full of millionaires, which I always thought meant that it was meant to be mine.

Not to mention, that house is in Bel Air, which is an even ritzier neighborhood than where Mary and her daughters live in their little coven compound, as Mom jokingly calls it.

I could already see us there, living in the lap of luxury in the town's most prestigious neighborhood. Not that our present home wasn't also pricey, but that place was the end all and be all for anyone who was anyone in this town. A place only those who had truly made it could afford to live because it wasn't just about the money; it was also about who you knew. Maybe this collab with Saunders was a gift in disguise after all and not the nightmare everyone was afraid of.

I couldn't seem too greedy, though; I've always paid the part of a doting wife who only cared about his best interest. If his interest so happened to line up with mine once, I steered him in that direction, all the better. So, I calmed my excitement and schooled my features to appear as nonchalant as possible.

"But you always said it was too expensive, that we didn't need it." I always knew, though, that he wanted to hold onto this one because of the memories he'd made here with her. So the fact that he was willing to give it up now must mean that he was really ready and willing to give us a chance, and not because of any vice on my part.

"I know what I used to say in the past, but I was wrong. I was wrong for making you stay here, knowing how much you hated it. I'd like it if we could leave all that behind us and start over. Would you like that?" Would I? Are you kidding me? Just when I was beginning to think all was lost, Ryder was finally coming around. The smile on my face rivaled the sun.

"I'd love nothing more."

"Good, that's good because I put a bid on the house, and I just got the news that we won." He pulled some papers from his pocket and a pen. "As long as you agree, we can sign off on it."

"You mean, you're going to put my name on the deed?"

"Of course, you're my wife. From now on, we should do everything together."

"We can wait until you have a lawyer look this over if you'd like." I snatched the pen and papers from his hand and started signing beneath where he had already signed. There were quite a few papers, but since this was my first time buying a home, I figured it was normal.

My heart raced in my chest, and my knees shook with sheer excitement at this turn of events. To think that just a few minutes before he came looking for me, I was at my worst, only for things to turn out this way. I'll never doubt the power that Mom holds again. But most importantly, I can't wait to rub this all in Mary's face.

He put the papers away again once I was done, and we got to our feet with my hands still held in his. "When can we move in?"

"Not yet, I'm having the place remodeled just for you, and it's going to take some time. Right now, I've hired someone to take care of upgrading the electricity and stuff like that, but once they're done, I plan on getting together with your mom to help me decorate it as a surprise for you."

Why did I become so worried? I should've known that Mom was always right. She'd got me to the altar after all, and that was the hardest part of this whole thing. "You should start making plans for a party, kind of a housewarming. Let's say in another couple of weeks. Things should be done by then. Remember, it's supposed to be a surprise, so don't go asking your mom about it. She won't tell you anything anyway because I've sworn her to secrecy. Now I have to get back to work, we start shooting in a month, and I still have a lot of work to do."

The kiss on my cheek was better than nothing and filled me with as much joy as if we'd shared a passionate kiss. A memory of some tabloid article with him kissing Elena years ago flashed into my head, but I brushed it aside. That's one of the recurring memories in my head because I've always wanted him to kiss me that way, but he never did; he never treated me the way the cameras had always captured him treating her.

I don't have to care about any of that now; I'd finally won. And once I get everything settled, with the Saunders group on my side, I'll be sure to make everyone pay for the way I've been treated. Starting with Mary and that MengeLiNi person, whoever she is.

I hugged myself with glee and rushed to find my phone to call Dad. Won't he have egg on his face once he hears?

***

*Ryder*

Damn, my acting skills must be better than I thought. I can't believe that worked. I kept a straight face until I was back on my side of the house and had to hold my hand up for Zak to wait when he came toward me as soon as I cleared the door. "One minute."

I rushed to the bathroom and threw up violently. I'd been very worried that I'd be found out, that I'd lose this chance and never be given another, but she'd bought it. I was free, well almost. I can't put into words how I felt. Not even getting off drugs had given me this much elation. I felt alive in a way I haven't in way too long, and all I could think about now was that I was almost in the clear. Soon, there will be nothing stopping me from taking back my life.

I got cleaned up and headed back into the room where Tyler and Zak were both waiting. I think I saw them clearly for the first time, these two men who I hadn't known until a short while ago, who had, for whatever reason, come all the way here to help me get through this. For as long as I live, I'll never be able to repay them for what they've done for me.

"Well? Did she sign?" I nodded my head at Tyler and passed him the signed papers that were pretty much my life. I was still coming to terms with the fact that it had been that easy. They told me that it would be, that now was the perfect time to strike, but I didn't believe it. How could something that I'd stressed over for so long be that easy? It had taken less than ten minutes after all the countless hours I'd spent going out of my mind. But they knew, they always know.

I'm still not sure how they knew that her visit with Mary would have her so frazzled that it would be the catalyst we needed to get her to sign without even reading the documents, just as long as I said my lines right and with just the right amount of feeling. "I need to sit down."

I also had to put my head between my knees and breathe really hard to offset the nausea that was still riding me pretty hard. My limbs felt a bit weak, and there was a tremble in my hands and knees, a tremble of relief and a release from the tension I'd been under when I had to sit there and look at her with a smile on my face when what I really wanted was to chuck her ass somewhere and be done with it.

"What happens now?" I looked back and forth between the two of them, and it was Tyler who answered.

"Now we file these papers, give it a week or so for everything to be ironclad, then you're free." Free, he could have no idea what those words mean to me. I was so grateful to them, but there was someone else or a few others that I needed to give my thanks to, not just them.

"You have to let me meet your nieces; I have to thank them personally for doing all this." I've never been more grateful for fans in my life. Never knew that anyone would go to such lengths to help a worthless piece of shit like me.

Worthless piece of shit; that's what these two had been taking turns calling me each time they learned something new about the way I'd fucked my life up. "That's not going to happen. They might agree to meet your girl, though; they're hardcore fans of hers. If she takes your stupid ass back, you just might get the chance."

"I thought the deal was that they liked our past relationship."

"Yeah, but you fucked that up, so guess whose side they're on. You're not that dumb; don't you know anything about little girls? No wonder that one got her hooks into you; you're not the brightest bulb, are you." Zak all but sneered at me.

How can someone insult you that smoothly? The way he spoke, you'd think he was giving me high praise. I wasn't offended, though; in fact, nothing these guys have done has offended me because once I got to know them a little better, I realized that they weren't that bad. They were, in fact, the kind of men I wished I could be. Now maybe I might still get that chance.

Soon, Elena, I'll be making my way back to you real soon. "Look at him, another bitch-made jackass. Wipe that smile off your face, kid; you're not in the clear yet; we still have to file these papers."

He pulled up his phone and called downstairs to one of the men he had brought here as a chef. Like him and Zak, only an idiot would look at my new household staff and buy that lie. Even the women look like the military.

I'd stopped caring once I came to terms with the fact that they were here not just for me but for whatever Mary and the others were up to. Now, with that last post, I think I have a pretty good idea of what that might be, and all I can say is that I'm just glad that some part of me was still human enough, even under the influence, to never cross that line. I'd hate to be the one these guys were after.

"Why don't you go write another song bitch-made? Keep yourself busy until D-day."

"You know what, that's not such a bad idea." I'd seen Elena since my song broke, granted it was in the tabloids and online, and even without the nieces decoding my shit, there was no guessing whether or not she'd got the message. I know that pout of hers very well. She was pissed.

Not only was she pissed, but she also knew that I was ready for a fight, and when I got this way, there wasn't a damn thing she could do to keep me from having my way. It felt good to be butting heads with my girl again.