27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27

Nikolai

My heart stops.

Pregnant.

Pregnant?

With me?

I can’t breathe. I can’t think. I can’t move an inch. I’m…going to be a father?

There’s a bubbling up of happiness inside my chest that’s growing, getting larger and larger until it consumes me completely. Nothing exists beyond my happiness, Z’Ree, and…our baby?

I’m guessing I’ve been quiet for too long as Z’Ree’s face falls and she steps back from me. “I’m sorry. I really am. I didn’t recognize the crystal kin song. It didn’t even occur to me because you’re human and I… It’s all my fault. I didn’t… I couldn’t…” Tears roll down her cheeks, tinkling on the floor. “I didn’t do this on purpose. I promise, I wasn’t trying to trap you or anything like that. Please don’t hate me.”

Pulling Z’Ree into my arms, I gently place a finger under her chin and nudge her to look at me. “I could never hate you, Z’Ree. I love you. And I couldn’t be happier about having a baby with you. This is great news.” And to think I’ve been dreading this conversation for hours!

“But…” She blinks, two more tears emerging out of the corners of her eyes. “We just met and—”

“And like you said, we’re meant to be together. Who cares if we have a baby now or in a year? I love you and nothing is going to change that. I can’t wait to love our baby, too.” It’s a miracle to think we’re genetically compatible at all. She’s part crystal! I hope our baby has her gorgeous eyes. Her skin. Her hair. Damn, I hope our baby is as beautiful as her and not dull like plain old me.

I reverently place my palm over Z’Ree’s stomach. A baby. If she were human, it wouldn’t even be considered an embryo yet, just a zygote beginning its journey to the uterus. A human woman wouldn’t even have a clue she’s pregnant. But Z’Ree isn’t human and if she claims we’re going to have a baby, I believe her.

We’re going to have a baby!

“Nikolai…” Z’Ree sniffles. She still hasn’t stopped crying.It doesn’t sound like the good kind of crying either. “I didn’t know. I didn’t realize before I went outside and now…”

Bone-chilling terror bursts my happy bubble. “The radiation,” I breathe out. “Fuck.”

Z’Ree nods, sniffling. “I didn’t know… I’m so sorry. I think it should be alright. I mean, the baby is half Silithrae, right? But… Please, don’t hate me, Nikolai,” she whispers before breaking down into a sobbing heap.

I hold Z’Ree against me, letting her cry while reigning in my own fears. I need to be calm and composed for her. “Z’Ree, I already told you. I could never hate you. Please stop saying that. Look, it’s going to be alright. If it’s meant to be, it’s meant to be. If not, then we’ll try again later. I promise. I’m here for you. Stay with me, alright?”

She mumbles something that I take to mean she agrees with me.

Taking a deep breath, I concentrate on what to do next. I’m a doctor. Well, I’m not actually a doctor, I never finished medical school back home and my father wouldn’t have allowed me to graduate officially even if I had. Yet, here on the Supernova, for all intents and purposes, I am a doctor. “Why don’t we start by scanning you to see how you’re doing, okay?”

Z’Ree whimpers, but lets me lift her up onto the examination table. I set the machine to do a default broad scan, then activate it. Z’Ree keeps her eyes closed as the machine scans her entire body, only the slight twitching of her shoulders tells me that she’s still crying.

It doesn’t take long for the results to show on the screen. Cai and the ship’s database are still down, so I can’t compare Z’Ree’s current results with expected values for a healthy adult Silithrae, but at first glance, there doesn’t seem to be anything out of order.

“Hmm,” I hum as I study the results. “I’d say you’re malnourished, which was expected. Lots of old injuries but they’ve either already healed or are healing well. Your…” I suppress a growl. I need to be professional. “The bones in your forearm show signs of a previous compound fracture that has healed but the bone is slightly misaligned. Was that…?”

“I made a mistake,” Z’Ree whispers. “Was punished for it.”

I really want to hit something to release my building anger but I force myself to smile instead. “Well, it’s nothing vital. Just a slight misalignment,” I add, more as a self comfort than anything else, before moving on. “This is interesting, your body has already cleared all of the radiation it absorbed during the space walk. That’s impressive.”

Her wide purple eyes fixate on me. “And…the baby?”

I squint at the three-dimensional image on screen. “There is something. It’s almost…well, if you were a human woman, I’d say it’s a gestational sac and that you’re about four to five weeks pregnant.” Which means Z’Ree would have been pregnant long before she met me. Then again, she’s not human so I can’t apply the same timetable to her.

Sensing the hesitation in my voice, Z’Ree rushes in to reassure me, “I haven’t been with anyone else, not in years. I swear, Nikolai.”

“I believe you.” Squeezing her shoulder with one hand, I tap on the screen with the other to run a more specific scan on her abdomen. “I’m just used to thinking in terms of human pregnancies. How long does a Silithrae pregnancy usually last?”

Finally, Z’Ree relaxes a little. “Three or four months,” she replies, giving me a hesitant smile. “I think? I’ve never been around a pregnant Silithrae. Even before we lost our planet, it was rare.”

I can imagine. If a female can only conceive with one specific person in the entire universe and that person doesn’t even have to be from her own planet, it’s a guaranteed fast track to population decline. “Three months,” I muse. Three times faster than humans. From a scientific perspective, it’s extremely fascinating. From my own personal perspective, it’s a little terrifying. Am I going to become a father in merely three months?

“But it is half human, so I don’t know if that makes a difference,” Z’Ree continues. Seeing that the machine is finished scanning, she places her hand over her abdomen. “Please, Nikolai. Is it going to be alright?”

I could humor her. Tell her that everything will be okay and that she has nothing to worry about. That her baby, our baby, is going to be perfectly alright. Yet, I don’t honestly know that everything will be okay and telling Z’Ree it will be feels like a betrayal of her trust. “I don’t know, Z’Ree. At this point, it’s impossible to tell. Radiation aside, even if you were one hundred percent healthy, there’s always a possibility of something going wrong later. Still, these scans don’t reveal anything alarming at the moment.”

I show Z’Ree the picture. There’s not much to see yet, just like the scan I did on Astra a few days back. Just a dot. I point at it. “This is the gestational sac. Normally, I could scan through it to see inside, but this one appears to be made of something that’s blocking the scanner.”

“It’s the crystalline shell,” Z’Ree explains, her eyes transfixed on the screen. “It protects the baby until it’s ready to be born.”

“That’s good, then. I’m guessing the baby’s not connected to you via the placenta yet. If that was the case, the risk of radiation poisoning would be much higher.”

I stop myself from explaining further. I’m not about to tell her how human fetuses in Chernobyl absorbed all of the radiation their mothers received during the power plant meltdown. Nor about the wave of miscarriages and damaged fetuses that came soon after. The mothers usually lived, though. A fetus is apparently an excellent filter for anything toxic the mother encounters during pregnancy.

Shuddering, I force my thoughts in a different direction. “At this point, the baby is just a few cells bunched together and, in your case, surrounded by a nearly impenetrable barrier. I think it’s safe to say the baby hasn’t been affected too badly.” Ah, to hell with staying professional. “Z’Ree, I think it’s going to be alright.”

Squealing and sobbing at the same time, Z’Ree launches herself into my arms. I catch her, barely, then lower us both down onto the floor. Curling up in my lap, Z’Ree cries tears of what I hope are tears of joyous relief. Still, I can’t be sure. Females are so fucking complicated, regardless of their species.

“T-thank you,” she whispers into my shirt. “Thank you so much, Nikolai. You’re so perfect. I don’t deserve someone as perfect as you.”

I’m far from perfect, as my cock is currently demonstrating. Here lies my poor mate, exhausted both physically and emotionally, and yet all my stupid dick can think about is fucking her. The fact that she’s wearing nothing under my shirt and is wriggling on my lap isn’t helping at all.

I bite back the moan threatening to escape when Z’Ree wriggles yet again. I won’t take advantage of a crying girl. I refuse to be that kind of guy.

Then Z’Ree kisses me, and my resolve disappears faster than vodka at a wedding feast. I return the kiss, eagerly, desperately. Before I know it, she’s straddling me, grinding her bare pussy against the raging hard on in my pants. “Oh, Nikolai,” she moans, then pauses. “Is it safe? For…for the baby?”

“Yes,” I reply, my hands venturing under her shirt. “Sex doesn’t add any significant risk at this point. Stress is much worse, and it’s been scientifically proven that sex is an excellent stress reliever.”

Z’Ree giggles against my lips. “Well, if it has been scientifically proven…”

I don’t add that it was only proven by human scientists who had no idea sentient aliens existed. It doesn’t matter.

Z’Ree pushes herself up onto her knees and quickly pulls my cock out. In one smooth motion, she sinks down onto it, taking me so deep and squeezing so hard I see stars. “Z’Ree,” I moan her name like a prayer. “Z’Ree!”

The ridges inside Z’Ree’s pussy are a little more pronounced than usual, telling me that perhaps she wasn’t entirely ready for this endeavor, but they’re not causing me any pain. If anything, they’re pushing me toward orgasm faster.

Grabbing onto Z’Ree’s hips, I need to stop her from moving if I want her to come first. “Not so fast, my jewel,” I tell her, flashing her a smile. “Or should I say, my crystal kin? Is that a thing your people say? Or do you have some special word for your mate, like the Syndorans do?”

“N-no…” She tries to move her hips but I’m holding her steady. “Nikolai,” she whines. “Please.”

The song that shouldn’t exist in my body thrums harder, begging me to pound into Z’Ree like a madman, but I resist. I want to take this slow.

I kiss every square inch of Z’Ree’s throat, sucking and nipping at her flesh until she’s squirming and moaning. Then I move down to her perky breasts, taunting her nipples, alternating between gently tugging and rolling them between my fingers then licking and sucking on each one.

“Oh, come on!” Z’Ree yanks my hair. “Nikolai! I want to fuck you! Now.” My answering cry is strangled as she clenches hard around my cock. Fuck, how am I supposed to resist this temptation?

“Well, they say men should never deprive their pregnant partners of anything they ask for, so…”

A smack lands across the back of my head. “I’m not that pregnant and if you don’t let me ride you right now, I’m going to bite your damned head off!”

Chuckling, I release my grip on her hips. “We wouldn’t want that to happen, now would we? Do your people do that often? Bite their partner’s head off, that is?” I tease, holding back my moans as Z’Ree starts grinding her hips down onto mine.

“No,” she growls, “but I think I might start a new tradition. Fuck, Nikolai… I need you. Please…”

I shift until I’m lying on the floor with Z’Ree straddling me. “I’m all yours, Z’Ree. Always. Take what you need, my jewel.”

She mewls, her breasts bouncing up and down as she rides me hard and fast. Capturing them with my hands, I roll each nipple between my thumbs and forefingers in that way that always makes her clench down. As if I’d just flicked a switch, Z’Ree clenches around my cock harder, her rhythm becoming erratic. She’s close, but so am I. I’m holding back as best I can, determined for her to come first.

She does. After a few agonizingly pleasurable minutes. The second her pussy muscles contract and squeeze, those fucking ridges practically massage my cock and I explode. I’m probably roaring in pleasure so loud that everyone on the ship will hear. Maybe on the entire station. I don’t give a damn.

Z’Ree slumps down onto my chest, panting. “That…was…”

“Yeah,” I agree. “It always is with you. You’re perfect, my jewel.” Stroking Z’Ree’s back, I frown when I realize my fingers are running over the excessively pronounced ridges of her ribs and spine. Z’Ree has no fat on her body and very little muscle to boot. It’s my job to fix this, both as the ship’s doctor and as the father of her unborn child.

Father. Incredible.

Then I remember my own upbringing and my insecurities force their way to the forefront of my mind. What if I’m as bad a father as he was?