Chapter Twelve

"So, how mad is she?" I ask as I lower her phone and look up at Willow, the music from the end credits of Este's show still playing quietly.

"Probably about as mad as you're imagining and then multiply that by ten," Willow answers somberly.

"Crap." I balance her phone on its side on the table and start gently rocking it back and forth. "I mean, she shouldn't be mad at me though right? I had nothing to do with any of that," I point out, hoping that Willow can at least give me some hope.

She looks up at me, judgement coating her eyes. "Of course she's mad at you."

"But I didn't do anything this time. I should be off the hook for once."

"Maybe you didn't do anything directly, but indirectly, this is your fault," Willow says as she gets up and grabs her phone from my hands. She examines it for any sign of abuse it might have endured from me taking my anxiety out on it and the table.

I let out a frustrated breath and lean back in my chair, throwing my arms up in defeat. "Okay, I'm going to need you to explain this to me."

She rolls her eyes at me. "Well, if you never wrote your songs, your video never would've gone viral. Which means Stephen never would've seen the video. Which in turn means he never would've invited you on tour. Which means you guys never would've been caught on tape rehearsing. Which means . . ." She moves her finger in a spiral motion as she goes on and on.

"That clip of us never would've gotten on the Este Show," I cut her off. "Okay, I get it. It's still not fair though," I huff as I grab my laptop off the table and click onto the video from the show. I start to scroll through the comments.

"Doesn't matter if you think it's fair or not, that's how Alison sees it. And your job is to stay on her good side so that you can finish off this tour. So, you need to see it how she sees it."

"What do you mean?" I ask looking up from the comments which are basically all pointing out the fact that Alison and I need to date if we aren't already.

"See the situation as she sees it. You need to be just as outraged as her. Match her energy. Trying to make her see that it isn't your fault is only going to make it worse. Logically, she knows that's true, but she's going to be upset with the world right now. Hearing the logical side right now will set her off even more."

"So I need to be as angry and irrational about it as her?" I ask.

"Yes, exactly. Now you're getting it." She smiles up at me. "Although, don't say it's irrational unless you want to be on the next flight home."

"So let her yell and blame me for it? Agree with everything she says?"

Willow nods.

"You see how insane that is right? I'm just supposed to take the blame for something that isn't my fault? Sounds a bit toxic to me."

Willow nods again. "I'm not saying you're wrong. There's a lot about Alison that you don't know though. She tends to react in the moment, but eventually she does come around. She's also great with apologies. Just stand with her right now instead of against her, and I promise it'll get better. She'll eventually make it right with you." She gives me a reassuring smile. "Not to mention, she has a lot going on right now. She's already on edge because of all of that and this is just adding to it."

"What's going on . . ." I start, but Willow cuts me off.

"She doesn't like to talk about it, so don't even ask. Just know, that life is trying to sink her like the Titanic after hitting the iceberg, and she's doing all she possibly can to cling on to that door. She's fighting for her life to keep from drowning."

"So, be Jack? Help her fight to not let go?"

Willow points a finger at me. "Ding ding ding. Now you're getting it."

I give her a small smile. "I can relate to that. So you think doing this will help deescalate her anger?"

"I hope so. If not, you'll be packing your bags, and I'll be waving to you like a hit Nsync song as you walk out the door." Willow shrugs. "I'd say this is your best option."

"Okay, I can do this," I say more to myself than to her.

I mentally start preparing myself for the conversation I'm going to have to have with Alison once she gets here. As much as I want to do this to stay on the tour, I'm also worried about her. I don't know what she's going through, but it bothers me that she might be hurting.

An hour later, we see Alison's car pulling up. She instantly climbs out of it and starts heading towards the door, not waiting for the driver to open the door for her.

It looks like she's showered and changed since the interview. I'm hoping maybe that has calmed her down a bit. By the way she's storming up the sidewalk, leaving everyone behind her, I know I probably won't get that lucky.

Once she finally makes it inside, Willow greets her with a quick hello. Alison returns it with a smile. An actual smile. My jaw drops. Is she really okay with everything that happened?

I quickly stand up and walk towards her.

"Hey, Alison," I say, putting as much enthusiasm in it as I possibly can.

Her face instantly drops. Her smile is replaced with what only can be described as a repulsive glare. She doesn't return my greeting. Okay, so maybe the pleasantries were just for Willow. My stomach starts to roll.

"Be angry," Willow whispers under her breath. I give a small nod.

"I saw the interview. I can't believe . . ." I start, raising my voice more and more as I go.

Alison throws her hand up at me. "Just stop. I don't want to talk about it. We have a lot of work to do to get you ready for tour in a few days. I don't have time to waste talking about the ever present rumor mill right now."

I look towards Willow, not knowing how to react to that. It's not at all what I expected to happen. Willow just shrugs.

Alison's clearly pissed at me. Her back-handed comment proves that well enough. The fact that she isn't at my throat right now is completely crazy. A flood of relief passes through me.

"Okay, sounds good," I answer, as I go to grab my guitar. "What do you want to start with?"

Alison grabs her glittery red guitar pick and starts gently running it over the strings of her guitar.

"The whole thing was just stupid anyway," she says under her breath. "It's all just gossip. I shouldn't let it bother me."

I look towards Willow who's waving her hands forward, encouraging me to respond.

"You're right. It is. It doesn't matter what they say. They just need things to talk about. And honestly, it could've been way worse. I mean, people thinking we're dating is probably one of the least harmful rumors that could be going around right now. Something that could easily be put to rest. I'm sure I can find someone to pretend to be my girlfriend and be photographed with her to get them off your back," I say confidently, thinking this is for sure going to walk her off her ledge.

The noise coming from her guitar instantly stops as she does a harsh spin towards me. Her eyes are so dark, she'd give any hungry vampire a run for its money.

"Just shut up and play," she barks out.

I look towards Willow for advice. She's slowly backing out of the room. She shrugs right before she disappears from sight as if to say ‘you're on your own kid.'

Alison starts strumming her guitar again. I quickly jump in matching what she's playing.

"I guess I can see why a rumor going around that you're dating me wouldn't seem so bad to you. Career boost right? That's all I seem to be good for, huh? Well, there's more to me than just the blonde hair blue-eyed pop singer people seem to think," she rattles on under her breath.

I don't say a word as I continue to play alongside her. I have a feeling any word that comes from my mouth is going to be the wrong thing to say.

We keep quiet for a few minutes as the notes surround us and slowly fill the room. Alison doesn't start singing at any point, so I just keep playing, letting the notes wrap around us like a warm blanket.

I watch Alison's face the entire time. The light is completely gone from her eyes. She looks like she is struggling so hard to mentally remain here in this room with me.

She lifts her hand to her eye and quickly swipes at it. A small part of me breaks at the thought that this has literally brought her to tears.

"You're more than that blonde hair blue-eyed pop singer to me," I whisper.