Mistress A-0002

I f it wasn’t for the voice in the back of my mind, I would have thought everything was returning to normal. I had no more nagging from Jett. My appointments were going smoothly for the most part. I saw Elec and he had smiled in passing. I even had a new promise ring Adrian had gifted me just this morning. He said it wasn’t just a promise of our commitment, but a promise of his devotion. I knew what he meant. It was a promise of my husband’s impending death. A promise that left me giddier than I wanted to admit. But it hadn’t lasted past the walk to my office. Silence brought worry. Worry fed delusions.

Tick.

Tick.

Tick.

The sound wouldn’t stop. No matter what I did, my eyes kept going to the clock on my office wall. With every jump of the seconds’ hand, I could feel the twinge of maddening screams build. I wanted to pace. To stand and…go crazy. I didn’t understand the onset any more than I could decipher why I was having a side effect to my own order for Ally to kill her Master, Braddock. It didn’t make sense. Hadn’t I walked myself through the exercises to reverse the action? Hadn’t I pushed my mind to mentally envision breaking the clock; defusing the bomb I implanted within her?

Tick.

Tick.

Tick.

Sweat built between my cleavage, and I pressed my blouse into wetness to soak it in. It was all in my head. It wasn’t real, and once Ally killed Braddock, it would stop. It would die with both of them. There was no way Elec would let the blank slate live with committing murder. All that would be left was Jett and Ronald. I didn’t suspect my husband would live past the week. Not with how determined Adrian was. I was doing the right thing by letting him take care of this for me, wasn’t I?

Knocking had my hand dropping from my chest, where I’d mindlessly moved my palm to rest over my racing heart. I stood, taking a deep breath, flattening my fingertips on the desk.

“Come in.”

The door cracked, pausing only a moment before a tall blonde woman walked in. Her hair was long, cascading in soft waves, stopping just past her narrowed shoulders. She had the typical Hollywood vibe, but more of an old Hollywood versus new. Elegance. Charm. There was no filler enhancing her slightly thin lips. No surgery correcting the width of her medium-sized nose. Her breasts didn’t appear to be augmented. Yet…she was one of the most beautiful women I had ever seen. She was real, holding a natural beauty that was refreshing and so unlike most of the women who came to see me.

“You must be Fiona Buret.” I walked around my desk as she shut the door, turning to meet me halfway. The pale blue dress she wore stopped just above her knees and fit modestly with its square neckline and hip-leveled white-trimmed pockets.

“Dr. LaRoe. It’s so nice to finally meet you.” She shook my hand, throwing me a dazzling smile. “I’ve only just got here. I decided it was best to check in with you before I settle into my apartment.”

“Of course. Yes, please, have a seat while I look over your file.”

At my gesture, she settled into the front chair as I headed back to mine. Usually with new entries, I would have scanned the chart beforehand, but I hadn’t even gotten that far.

“Did our Main Master give you the tour yet? We have a wonderful movie theater, as well as some great boutiques.”

I glanced up to her amused gaze as I opened the file.

“That’s not necessary. I’m very well acquainted with this place. I’m not here as a new Mistress, Dr. LaRoe. I was informed you were made aware of my arrival.”

“I was. Nineteen informed me of your arrival just this morning.” I stopped, blinking in confusion. Again, I glanced at the words inside the folder. All I was seeing was typed letters and scribbles of initials and signatures. Nothing registered as I cleared my throat and forced my brain to kick in. Presented. Best interest. Blah-blah. Lawyer.

“L-Lawyer,” I stammered, still not able to put the pieces together.

“Yes.” Her smile held concern as she scanned my face. “I hope that’s okay. I assure you, I’m the best.”

“Lawyer,” I repeated. Lawyer. Lawyer.

“The Main Master thought it was in your best interest that you obtain council. For Jett,” she emphasized. “The trial?—”

My hand shot up. Seconds passed before I could trust myself to speak.

“Elec sent you to represent my son?”

A pause. “Dr. LaRoe, Jett’s charges are?—”

My head shook, and I pushed to my feet. Anger built by the second, but not because of Elec. My freedom was threatened. My glimmer of hope wavered as my plans became endangered. Represent Jett? Represent that lying, ungrateful, troublemaker?

“I know the charges and so does Jett. Has he asked for help? Has he requested council?”

“Well…no.”

“Because he has nothing to hide. He will not be found guilty because the slave was complicit. She wanted it .” I pushed to stand and lean forward as I glared down at her. She was no longer beautiful to me. I wanted to see her face bashed in. I wanted her to pay for thinking of derailing my plans.

“Dr. LaRoe, Jett is young. He may not even know he’s allowed a lawyer. If you’ll just let me meet with him. I’m here to help.”

“Are you, with your modest dress and nude lipstick? I’m not so sure about that. You tell the Main Master thank you for the offer, but Jett will be found innocent of these charges.” She stood to mirror me. “And if not,” I continued. “He brought it on himself. He doesn’t need a lawyer. He needs his mother. We’re done here. Good day, Ms. Buret.”

“Dr. LaRoe?—”

“Good. Day .”

There was hesitation as she nodded and turned for the door. The moment she shut the barrier behind her, I dug my fingertips in the wood of my desk, holding in the frustrated scream that wanted to tear from me. I should have been prepared. I should have expected Elec to look out for me. Sure, he was still pissed and cautious of my intentions, but he cared for my wellbeing. How could he not after everything we subconsciously shared? Even if he didn’t recall any of our time together, it still happened. Intimacy on that level left a mark. Ours was so deep, there was no escape for either of us. If one of us sensed discomfort from the other, not helping would be impossible. Together, we were a working machine. We needed each other to function. Apart, we were bound to fail. Elec knew that. I had made sure of it. This would pass. It was a phase. That’s all. It would pass.

I grabbed my phone, stopping as knocking rapped on my door. My teeth bit down into each other, and I let go of my phone, smoothing the front of my skirt as I straightened my spine.

“Come in.”

The door opened, and a younger man walked through. He was tall and wide-shouldered, with dark skin and beautiful, round eyes. Had I not had a million things on my mind, he might have caught my attention with more than looks. As it was, all I wanted to do was call Elec. I wanted to lash out and play the victim. I wanted to?—

“I’m early. I know I should have waited, but when I saw the woman leave, I assumed maybe your appointment was over. Forgive me if I’m intruding.”

A smile appeared on my face, so natural, so automatic, just like breathing.

“You’re not. You were right. We finished early. Please, come in. I’m sorry, I don’t have your file up yet.” I walked around my desk, holding out my hand. He took it as he walked up.

“It’s my fault. I’m Logan Cavalier. Master B-Twenty-seven-oh-one.”

Shock warped my smile with a dash of excitement.

“The youngest Cavalier boy. I worked with your father when I taught at Bridgepoint. Our secret academy. How is Darius?”

He laughed. “He’s as stubborn as ever. Determined. He’s actually the reason I requested you as my doctor. He had great things to say about you, Dr. LaRoe. He’s still a professor. Just…working more on the inside these days.”

The never-ending edge of nerves eased enough for my muscles to relax as I let go and headed back to my desk. Logan took a seat as I grabbed the next file.

“Of course he is. Your father is a brilliant man. I knew he’d go far.”

“And he’s forever grateful to you for everything you’ve done for our family. So am I. I was ecstatic when I was contacted and offered a position as a Master here at the Garden of the Gods. A bit surprised, to be honest, but relieved when I was made aware there’d be…help for me.”

“Our Main Master only chooses the best. We’re happy to have you. Has he already given you the tour?”

“He did, earlier this morning upon my arrival.”

“Isn’t he wonderful?”

Logan smiled at my bubbly tone. “He was very gracious and made me feel at ease. There’s something about him.” He laughed. “It’s like when you talk to him, you’ve known him forever. It’s probably because of the videos we’re made to watch the weeks before we come here.”

“Indeed,” I beamed. “I’m glad you were able to meet with him. He stays pretty busy these days.”

“I was honored.” Logan shifted. “The Main Master mentioned the next auction wasn’t for quite a few more weeks.”

“That’s right.” I scanned the summary sheet, looking for keywords that stood out. From first appearances, Logan presented as ‘normal’. Nothing threw flags to me, but his sudden fidgeting did as he waited. “Does the timeline make you anxious, Master?”

“Oh, no. I just.” He stopped. “I guess I thought it might be a little sooner. It’s truly not a problem, though. I can contain myself. I’m good at restraint.”

I nodded in reassurance, lowering my gaze to words that blurred. Blinking, I cleared my throat, blinking hard again as they finally adjusted on the page. Was I starting to sweat again? I tried to ignore the returned crawling sensation on my skin.

“As I go through your questionnaire and the information obtained by our scouts, I just want to put you at ease. In no way am I judging you. The reason we have these meetings with doctors like me… and the Main Master ,” I rushed out, “is so that you know you’re not alone. Who you are down here, is who you’re supposed to be. Society doesn’t accept that, and that’s okay. But we do. We embrace our true nature in the Gardens, whatever that may be.”

I smiled as Logan nodded and seemed to relax. I used the opportunity to start scanning through his history. With each sentence, I could feel my smile slowly fading, fading, until there was nothing there at all. Not acceptance like I preached. Not disgust. Numbness bled in with every sentence I took in, and my dad’s voice returned.

Sweat. Fuck I was sweating again.

Clearing my throat, I shifted in my chair, talking as I read on.

“It says you were nine when your sister passed. You exhibited grief, as expected. Withdrawal from friends and social events lasting months.” My fingers raked through my hair. “It was a drowning in your parent’s pool. She was three.”

“That’s right. She must have gone out the back while everyone was still sleeping. She didn’t swim well. My parents were trying to teach her. My dad had even brought someone in, but she’d only just started learning.”

I rotated my shoulders, feeling the moisture run a river between my cleavage.

“I’m sorry for your loss. I wasn’t aware you had a sister. I thought you were the youngest.”

A pause. “Thank you, but no. It was very sad what happened to Belinda.”

My stare rose to take in his slightly defensive expression. I immediately lowered it, trying to put my focus back on the questionnaire as if I wasn’t facing my own demons. Coincidence?

“As your doctor, I have to ask. Like I said before, no judgement, but honesty is key. Did you have anything to do with your sister’s death?”

Another pause. Anger. “I guess I knew that question was coming. How could it not with how I am? My father suspected as much. Even my mother, although they never asked. No. I didn’t kill Belinda.”

“You’re positive?”

“I think that’s something I would remember.”

“Like I said before, there’s no judgment here. Only honesty.”

“I am being honest. Dr. LaRoe, I was fond of my sister. I didn’t kill Belinda. It was an accident.”

Accident. Right. Maybe.

I forced the swallow, nodding as I pushed the memories away. Last patient, then I could close up.

Tick.

Tick.

I glanced up to the clock, forcing my gaze back to the papers. Scanning. Scanning. Flipping the page. Flipping another. Words. Sweat. Delusional. Disorders. Not right. Wrong. My brow drew in as the events led me deeper into the mindset of my client.

Tick.

Tick.

The autopsy report. Date. Time. Close. Too close? Pictures. One family picture. My breath caught as I got trapped in the hysterical screams of my parents. Seconds. A minute. Longer?

Paper bent under the pressure of my fingers and my eyes shot up to the clock, only to lower to his intensive stare. The depths stirred heat inside my chest. Fire that was already brewing at the words, waiting…

“Your sister seems to be the basis of your depressive episodes during youth. There’s a family picture where she’s wearing a pink bow in her hair. Seems your fond of pink bows now with your victims. My sister wore a pink bow too,” I ground out. “The ages. The accident .”

“I’m sorry?”

“Is this a joke? Did someone put you up to this? Did Elec?”

Logan’s lips parted. “I’m not sure I understand.”

“Enough. No more lies. Who set you up to this?”

“Dr. LaRoe, I don’t know what you mean.”

“This!” I threw the family portrait his way, shooting to my feet to pull open my drawer and toss him the frame of my own. They were nearly a mirror with the placements of our two families. Him and his brothers and sister in the front. Me and my sister in the front. Parents in the back. Both little girls…pink bows, even down to the exact shade. Papers slid to the side and more crumbled under my hectic shuffling as I went through to point to the findings in the autopsy. “You had no sister. Darius would have told me. He would have—You had no sister. I did . Your information and story is as fake as you are. You’re not Logan Cavalier. Who sent you here?”

“I…don’t know what to say. I’m Logan Cavalier. You can call my dad right now. Everything I’ve said is the truth.”

“Explain the picture. Explain the death. My sister died in a pool too, at three .”

“Purely coincidental. I swear it.”

Swear. He sweared? I could have sworn too. I did…and I had lied. Liar. Delusional.

The man eased to his feet. His brow was crinkled, but there was almost a satisfaction in his gaze. But he had pain. If I didn’t know better, he saw past mine. Was that why he was trying to hide his smug smile? Was he mocking me? Did he know? Nobody knew . It was me. This was me. No—Facts. I needed the facts. Breathe. Calm.

“I’m sorry. I-I.” I pulled at my damp blouse. “I apologize. You don’t understand the gravity of my accusations. It’s more than the picture. More than the bow. I lost a sister in the exact month as yours, almost down to the day. Just a different year. You say coincidence, but the odds—” My head shook. Tick. Tick. “We’re going to have to do this another time.”

“I’m sorry for your loss, Dr. LaRoe. I’m sorry for how this looks as well. I truly am.”

Was he too calm? Too unsurprised? My eyes narrowed, then relaxed, but narrowed again as I walked around my desk. My tapping was immediate as I talked.

“Thank you, but it is me who must apologize. I shouldn’t have reacted that way. My outburst was uncalled for. That was extremely unprofessional on my part. I had no idea the death of my own sister would trigger such a response. I haven’t thought about her for years now. I was caught off guard.”

“Don’t apologize. I know the pain. I’ll give you your space. Just let me know when you want me to come back.”

“I will. Thank you.”

Soft tone. Hard expression. No sympathy. Still a tinge of arrogance. One, I couldn’t begin to dissect as I watched him leave. I could barely control the speed of my heavy breaths. I turned, snatching the phone from my desk. The immediate ringing sent my heart racing even more. The voice that came through didn’t calm me.

“Mistress Two. You called earlier. How can I help you?”

My mouth opened, but words didn’t come right away. Maybe I thought I’d be given another excuse by Nineteen. Perhaps I was expecting the voicemail to kick on.

“Elec. Main Master,” I glanced at the clock, blinking past the blurriness. “Did you give the approval on Logan Cavalier?”

“Our newest Master. I gave him the tour this morning. Has he come by to see you yet?”

“Did you do it?”

“I’m not sure what you mean.”

“Elec,” I nearly growled. “I know you’re upset with me. We’re at odds, but you’ve gone too far.”

A pause. “I’m not sure what you’re referring to. Melissa…are you okay?”

“If it wasn’t you, then who? Belinda, Melinda. Both died at the age of three. Same accident. Same month of death? Darius Cavalier never had a daughter.”

“Melissa…he did. We even celebrated her birth at Bridgepoint.” He stopped and seconds passed. “Actually, I’m not sure you were there that day. I would remember seeing you, and I don’t recall you being there, but you have to remember being invited. Darius invited the entire board as well as the senior class.”

“But.” I rubbed against my left eye. “You just don’t forget a birth. I would have remembered. I?—”

“It was a busy time for us in those days. I barely remembered even attending the celebration when I was going over Logan’s file. I believe we were deep in the Fuller files with rewiring memories, and you must remember how chaotic those days were. It was a clusterfuck. Calm.” He took a breath. “How similar it was to your past escaped me. For that, I’m sorry. You know I’d never try to hurt you like that.”

Hurt me? Logan sharing a past didn’t hurt me…it made me suspicious. Paranoid .

“Melissa, are you okay? Should I call Dr. Almer? I hear you’re not feeling well lately. I could bring in?—”

“No,” I rushed out. “I don’t need any help. I’m fine, really. I was just caught off guard. Now that you mentioned it, I think I might remember something about Belinda.” I squeezed my eyes shut before opening them again to glance to the clock. “It’s been a long day. It just completely escaped my mind.”

“You’re stressed. With Jett’s trail approaching, it can’t be easy for you.”

My lip peeled back. “I’m sick over it.”

“Did you speak with Mistress Ninety-nine?”

My mind blanked, but I quickly put it together. “Fiona Buret.”

“Yes. Amazing lawyer. She beat Bram once in court. Long time ago, but?—”

“We’re not interested. I appreciate your concern, Elec, I really do, but Jett doesn’t need a lawyer. He did nothing wrong.”

Silence. I pulled at the neckline of my blouse as the seconds passed.

“You don’t want Jett represented? You know he faces death.”

“So has other Masters, and they don’t get the option of lawyers. He’s accused. He’s either innocent or guilty. He brought this on himself. Am I scared what will happen to my son. Absolutely. Am I going to allow him to appear guilty and privileged because of his own actions? Not on his life. He’s a LaRoe. He’s either going to live by who he is or die by it.”

More silence.

Had I sounded too angry? Too unstable? Why was I fucking sweating so badly?

“I respect your stance. Just so your aware, I was updated not an hour ago that Jett is doing well, given the circumstances. I will keep you updated if I learn anything new.”

“Thank you.” I swallowed hard glancing back to the clock. “Elec…Have you ever come across a trigger you couldn’t break?”

“From someone?”

The curiosity was genuine, and I felt it put me at ease.

“Sort of. I mean, I guess.” I bit against my lip, not able to sit still. “I find myself going over the most basic beginnings of our craft. Do you think triggers could evolve so profoundly that they go beyond affecting the target?”

“Beyond? Who else would they affect?”

I laughed. “I don’t know. Anyone. Us? What we do—how far we go—there’s no scientific data of long-term side effects. What we do goes beyond words or actions. Beyond hypnosis or simple brainwashing. The Masters or Mistresses, they have no idea what they’re undergoing when they join. And that’s fine. Really, I don’t care. What I worry about is whether we’re rewiring our brains, along with theirs. The triggers…” I threw my hand up. “Take the tapping I accidently did on you. A natural reaction during stress, but subconsciously, Elec... what is it doing to me? We know what it did to you. It did what it was supposed to but.”

I stopped and Elec immediately picked up.

“Are you saying you’re being affected by your own triggers?”

Tick.

Tick.

“Of course not,” I rushed out. “Not that I know of, but could I be and not know it, is what I’m saying.”

“Hmm.”

“I think we need to get back to the lab. We need to run tests. With you as the Main Master, I don’t think we can be too safe.”

Footsteps.

“It’s an interesting theory, but not one I think we need to worry about. Unless there’s more you need to tell me.”

“No,” I forced out.

“Great. It’s a good catch, but I think we have time before we need to worry about anything like that. I have to go. I’ll keep you updated on Jett.”

“ Elec .”

“Yes?”

I turned to face my desk, resting one of my hands down for balance as I closed my lids.

“Have you seen Braddock? I don’t like him so unstable. I know I’m supposed to let it go and stay away, but you know I can’t. That’s not how I work. He’s my patient, and he’s not well. I need to see him.”

“Don’t.”

“He needs help . I can help him. You need to let me see him.”

Was I tapping ever so quietly? God, I was, and I couldn’t stop myself.

“Melissa…”

“ Please . He’s unwell. He’s going to explode soon if you don’t let me see him. His wellbeing is my priority. Send him to me . I’m the only one who can save him. And I can. I know I can. The triggers,” I forced out. “They’re embedded in him. Let me deactivate them on my end. Five minutes. That’s all I need. You can be right there. You can even let him bring his slave. She said I did something to her.” I clenched my teeth until they were aching, spinning to the clock. Tick. Tick . “I have to stop the triggers. They’re there, Elec. We can’t risk a massacre on Braddock or his slave’s end, and that’s what could very well happen if you don’t let me see them.”

“It’s not going to happen, Melissa.”

Stern. His tone was cemented in decision which had the rage exploding to life. No sway from the taps. Nothing . Elec sounded completely unphased! Had I not tapped loud enough? Bullshit, on some level he would have heard my order.

“Fine,” I gritted out. “But if something happens, the blood is on your hands. And it’s coming, Elec. Mark my words, one of them is going to die. When it happens, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”