Chapter Eleven

The day before, I had missed shifting class and, while I'd thrown a fit about the whole day going to shit, I realized now that it had been a blessing.

Today, I hadn't been afforded the chance to miss it.

I stood there, listening to the rules about where to run and how to not attack each other. Control the shift. Control your animal.

If you see a human—run.

Grim had gently touched my shoulder as he entered the open field outside the main building, but as the teacher spoke, he, Theron, and Bodhi didn't mutter a word.

Had Grim told them about what happened between us after dinner? Last night, I had lain awake for hours, reliving the kiss and at the same time, feeling like somehow I had betrayed Theron and Bodhi. I never wanted to hurt them. We barely knew each other and I'd sealed myself to them somehow.

"Alright, everyone. Let's shift." I turned my gaze to the ground while everyone shed their clothes without hesitation. Sure there were leering eyes; we were young and virile students after all.

I backed up a few paces, letting the real shifters have some space.

Humiliation flooded me. It had been too easy to hide myself among the humans, pretend that I was one of them. Standing outside the group of those like me, in name only, while they used their supernatural force to phase from human form to a wolf reminded me how I belonged nowhere. Not with the humans.

And now, not even with shifters.

I turned my gaze up to the trees that thrived here, amongst the buildings that triumphed their height. The leaves had begun to turn from green to hues of rust, burgundy, and blood orange. They waved back and forth in the wind as I wrapped my arms around myself.

Now would be a great time for that heat to kick in inside me—minus the freaking out.

Then again, that blitzkrieg of panic had brought Grim to me. Made me feel things I'd never felt in my life but craved more than my next breath.

I might go through it again, voluntarily, if it meant he would touch me again.

I brought my attention back to the scene in front of me, steeling myself for the onslaught of embarrassment. Over the years growing up, my parents had tried to get me to shift a few times and I went along with it, eager to try harder.

Maybe next time, Minx.

It will happen, Minx. Don't worry.

All in good time.

Your wolf will arise when she's supposed to.

My wolf hadn't gotten the memo.

But with the embarrassment came a splice of pride. Theron, Bodhi, and Grim had already shifted. I got on the ground, on my knees, hoping they would get closer. They were breathtaking in their human forms, but their wolves were sights to behold. Theron's wolf boasted the colors of autumn, all of them threaded into his fur. His amber eyes stayed the same.

Grim's wolf's appearance was no surprise. His shiny, inky fur stood out among the rest of the wolves who now spread out to run.

Bodhi's wolf approached me and hit my hip with his nose. Tears welled in my eyes as I clenched my jaw and forced a smile. I'd always wished to have my first shift, but seeing them around me made me want it even more.

Longing singed my insides and built up until the tears fell. Thankfully, after the boys had given up and run away on their own. Grim looked back twice before disappearing into the forest with the others.

I stood and blew out a breath.

If my wolf could only speak to me, then maybe I could convince her to come out.

Silence remained.

I could've used a friend right then.

I sat on a wooden seat, much like a park bench, and let my thoughts wander to how tender Grim had been the night before. Joy rose within me thinking about their wolves and how much fun they must be having, running together.

I stood with a pulse of energy that emerged out of nowhere. I pressed my fingers to my chest, waiting for something to happen. My skin itched. The raging warmth took over but this time, it wasn't just my chest or my torso; it was my entire body.

The skin of my fingertips crawled with movement under the surface.

I lurched forward with an overwhelming need to get on my hands and knees. My nostrils flared with new scents battering me all at once. The scent of the trees. The variety of body scents from the other students blasted at me, some making me sick and some I could decipher. The chocolate of Grim, the whiskey and smoke of Theron, the cedar and cinnamon that was Bodhi.

Gods, why and how could I smell them above all the others?

My gums ached.

Was this my wolf? Was she finally trying to come out? I didn't know, but as the students trickled back in, putting on their clothes again and gathering up to talk about the run, I knew now wasn't the time.

I hear you, wolf.

I forced myself to walk away as my three—the three guys came back. The ones who haunted my thoughts. I couldn't let them see my shame.

This piece of me I had to keep to myself.

I heard them calling out for me but squared off my shoulders and continued my path back to the building.

No matter how painful it was.