19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

Elias

Seven Years of Age

I hated bikes.

Sure, they’re faster than feet, but my feet work pretty well thank you very much . So well I can easily glide with blades on them—and that makes me fast.

That's what I thought as I lay on the ground tangled around said stupid bike. And who designed them to brake by moving backward ? And if you ask me the handbrake is just a tease. The sky was as blue as blue could be, and I tried to take it in with heavy breaths. I muttered to myself that I was okay—even though I knew I wasn’t. I didn't look at my arm because the pain alone told me it was broken. Heavy steps thudded behind me, followed by heaving breaths.

“Mouse!” Shane’s concerned face filled my field of vision.

He assessed me and though his face went pale, my brave best friend forced a smile. “You really got some speed there! I bet you were as fast as light itself.”

“Yeah?” I managed to croak out.

“Totally. So, here’s what we are going to do. I am going to untangle you and carry you home, okay?”

I nodded, unable to speak without my voice cracking. Silent tears fell from my eye as Jarman slowly untangled me, gentle with all my limbs. He took of his hoodie, giving me a funny look. “This may hurt, but one of those silly doctor shows said to cradle a broken arm. I’m going to make a sling with my jumper, okay?”

I nodded again, letting him manipulate my arm. Pain shot through my body, making me bite my lip hard to muffle my cries.

“You are so brave, Mouse,” he murmured softly. Once my arm was secured—which admittedly felt a little better—Shane awkwardly carried me up the hill to my house.

When I looked up to see tears streaking his own cheeks, , I worried my weight was too much. “I can walk. I don't want you hurting too.”

Shane gave me a small, tear-filled smile. “I'm fine. I just can't help it: when you cry, I cry.”

There was a beat of silence. “At least I get the experience of having a cast. You can be the first to sign it.” I murmured, making him laugh.

“Only you would find something good out of breaking your arm.”

Present

The sounds of moans and groans jolted me awake in the middle of the night.

“Oh, baby—fuck you feel so good.”

“Hunter… Fuck, babe. Harder.”

It sounded like something out of a porno and with the combination of Shane’s rigid length pressing into my ass, blood rushed south. The need for something had me rolling my hips back into Shane, making him groan in his sleep—or so I thought. His hand snapped to my hip, effectively stilling me and I whimpered in protest. I was so horny, and I didn’t know why. I’d never been that turned on in my life.

“Eli?” he whispered, testing to see if I was awake. I had a choice: I was asleep, or do it again. I was never good with decisions—most of mine in life had been made for me.

“Hunter, I'm so close.”

The groans from down the hall made my cock throb, my mind traveling to somewhere it hadn’t gone before: Shane’s fingers digging into my hips as he fucked me . The whole concept wasn’t something I had ever explored. If this was a game of never have I ever, I wouldn’t be drinking if someone said watched gay sex . Obviously, I understood the concept… I thought I did, anyway. But in that moment, all that idea gave me was another jolt to my belly. I pushed against his hold, grinding my ass against his bulge—his hard bulge—and damn, he was big. That was a turn-on in its own right. A moan pushed past my lips.

“Eli?” he questioned, a little louder than before.

“Hmm?”

His hand massaged my hip, the small gesture having a big effect on my cock. It jumped against my stomach.

“Are you okay?”

The sound of flesh slapping against flesh filtered through the walls. I was hovering on the edge without even touching myself, and it had nothing to do with those noises.

“Not really,” I mumbled honestly. I wanted something, needed some sort of friction. I rocked back again, relishing the warmth spreading through my veins.

“Fuck, sweetheart. You have to stop doing that.”

“Why?” I whined.

“Because you are giving me ideas I shouldn’t be having about you.”

That had me stiffening a little, doubt trickling into my mind.

“Don’t you want me?” I felt pathetic even asking, but I blamed the lack of blood in my brain for the rash decision.

“Of course I want you, but I didn’t think you wanted me .”

I didn’t know how to explain how I felt, but there was one thing I was certain of: I wanted Shane Jarman.

“I just want you,” I voiced, body warming at the pathetic whimper in my tone. I panted, trying to take a full breath for my next confession. “I’ve never been this hard in my life. Please, Shane.”

There was a pause, then, “Tell me what you need, sweetheart.”

The only response I could muster was a moan. With Jenna, I had to be the alpha male—always the one in charge. There was something about someone wanting to take care of me… “Please touch me.”

He growled, the rumble making my body vibrate from head to toe.

I wanted to know how to make him do that again.

The hand on my hip crept around, dipping between my legs and cupping my erection. The whimper that pushed past my lips was entirely involuntarily.

“Is this where you want me?”

I nodded fast on the pillow, biting my lip to stop those pathetic noises.

“I need your words, sweetheart.”

“Yes,” I cried. “Please, Shane… please touch me.”

Lips met the back of my neck, and pleasure rippled down my spine. His hand began to move, so slowly it was painful and the first brush of his calloused fingers against my sensitive flesh nearly made me lose it. He teased down my shaft, rolling my balls in his palm as he explored the most intimate parts of me.

“You feel so good.” His deep tenor had my hips pushing into his hand.

I gasped, his hand giving me one firm tug—then it was gone. The loss had me whining—loud. “Jarman, please.”

He chuckled. “Shane, sweetheart.”

I turned to look over my shoulder and the undeniable heat in his eyes had me nodding in agreement.

He rolled away and I made a pathetic sound of protest. After feeling his hand, the lack of friction sent my body into overdrive.

“Calm down, I’m just grabbing the lube.”

He shuffled around in the drawer, then he was manhandling me onto my back, holding his weight over me. I grabbed his hips and pulled, wanting to feel him pinning me to the mattress. “I'm too heavy.”

I met his eyes, seeing a warmth I’d never known from him before. The way he was looking at me made me feel seen for the first time. He saw every inch of me: the vulnerable, the happy, the silly. He knew my body through the years, in all of its forms and he still looked at me like that —like I was the only person he wanted in this world. My breath hitched. “I want tofeel you, Shane.”

The desire in his eyes could have powered an entire arena. He lowered himself slowly, setting my nerve endings on fire. He was the tequila, salt, and lime all in one.

Then his nose was touching mine, and the fan of his breath against my lips had me rolling my hips, grinding my erection against his.

My eyelids fluttered shut.

“Like that, Eli?” he murmured against my lips.

I nodded, the tease of a kiss making me want more .

Shane rocked his hips, my eyes rolling back in my head as my body lit up like fireworks on the Fourth of July.

“I really want to kiss you,” he whispered, the hushed words music to my ears.

“Then kiss me.”

I pried my eyes open, almost overwhelmed with the adoration in his gaze. But I didn’t have time to dwell on it. They shut again at the feeling of his plump lips tentatively pressing against mine. I added more pressure, needing more contact. I felt the moment Shane let go, his body molding to mine as he sank into his kiss. His tongue swiped against the seam of my mouth, begging for entry—which I happily granted.

For so long I’d wondered what was wrong with me, why this never seemed to happen with anyone else. I hid the insecurity like dirty magazines under a teenager’s bed. But now it all made sense: I was holding out for him.

My cock wept, desperate for attention as he took his sweet time exploring my mouth.

“God, sweetheart,” he panted, breaking away from the kiss. “You don’t understand how good it feels to kiss you.”

I brought my hand up to cup his cheek, feeling his beard under my fingers. The amount of times I wondered what it would be like to feel his beard—even before I had this revelation. He leaned into my touch, turning his head to kiss my palm.

He was a beautiful man, and I cursed myself for not seeing it all these years.

I used my grip on him to pull his mouth back to mine, hoping the kiss said what I wasn't ready to. Lust coursed through my veins, and I wanted to chase the high that was Shane Jarman. My hips bucked again, my body overwhelmed with the smell and tasted of him.

Shane pulled back and I mumbled a complaint, because he was teasing me to no end. “Can I take off our briefs?” he asked—making the loss worth it

Fuck yes

My head bobbed emphatically, and his answering smile had me biting my lip. The man was the definition of a panty dropper .

The bright moonlight streaming through the window gave the illusion that Shane’s abs shimmered as he slid off his underwear and I had a sudden urge to get my hands on his ass. Straight or not—it was a sight to behold.

I sucked in another breath with the feeling of his hands sliding up my legs. He hooked his fingers behind my waistband and pulled the cotton off in one swift move, quickly replacing it with his body. I never would have described myself as a noisy person in bed, but I was keening, fighting more obscene sounds as our bare skin touched.

My body wasn’t my own anymore—it was his, arching against the warm mix of silky skin and the coarse scrape of body hair.

“If this is a dream, don’t wake me up.” Shane mumbled into my neck. I couldn’t help but laugh.

“It's real. I have never been so turned on in my life,” I admitted.

Shane pulled back to look in my eyes. “God, I am the luckiest man alive.”

“Make it even better,” I hummed. “Make us come.”

Just like that he dove back into my mouth. I felt his hand fumbling around for the little plastic bottle and then his slick palm wrapped around both of us.

Tyler and Hunter weren’t the only ones being loud anymore.

Shane swallowed my cries, jacking us off in slow measured strokes. It wasn’t long before that tingle started low in my belly and I shot off like a rocket, coming so hard—hot, sticky liquid hit my chin.

“Fuck, that’s hot,” Shane panted, milking me dry and finishing himself off.

Our slick, sweaty chests brushed each other as we fought to catch our breath. I could see him questioning me, seeming to anticipate my freak out—but it never came. I was too blissed out to panic, melting into the pillows with a sated smile.

“I'm not going to freak, Shane.”

“It would be okay if you did.”

I shook my head, feeling like I was underwater. “I wanted that, I wanted you . I can’t explain it… but that’s never happened to me before.” I hope he knew what I meant by “that.” It was too embarrassing to explain.

The way his brow furrowed told me he didn’t, but thankfully he dropped the subject. With a kiss on the nose, he mumbled he would be back.

Water ran in the bathroom, then Shane re-entered the room and wiped me up with a warm, wet cloth. The act was so intimate that my heart thundered in my chest.

He climbed back into bed, and I immediately found my spot on his chest, this time throwing my leg over his thick, naked thigh. We hadn’t gotten dressed. The last thing I remembered before drifting to sleep was Shane’s lips against my forehead and for once, everything felt just right.