34. Justine

"What's this?"

"Your birthing palace."

"My what?"

"It's where you'll give birth."

"Aren't I going to the hospital for that?"

Once again, I have no idea what the hell is going on.

The man turned a room I had never seen in another wing of the house into some sort of…I don't know what to call it. It's gorgeous, that's all I can say. The walls are pink marble, there's nothing but luxury wherever I look, and this does not strike me as a place where guts and gore should be displayed.

The room was bigger than the bedroom in our master suite, and that's saying a lot. There was a pedestal tub on a marble platform, bathrobes, towels, a bed, a birthing bed, and who knows what else. It also looked like he'd brought half the garden inside.

There were incense burning censers and some other crap that I'd never seen and didn't know what they were for. Outside of that area was a sitting area where I guess he would be waiting. It looked like something Cleopatra would've liked, with banquets and gold mirrors on the walls.

"Where did you come up with this idea?"

"It's an old Asian custom. The women in the royal family had a special birthing room in the palace; I kinda like that idea."

‘As long as there's epidural in this bitch, otherwise, I'm out.'

Not now, Justice.

‘Humph.'

"What's Justice saying? He doesn't like it?"

"He's just wondering if there will be the usual hospital amenities available."

‘You know, like a fucking doctor and some drugs, you crazy bastard.

Justice hush.

"Of course, your doctor, a midwife, a doula, and two qualified nurses."

I'm almost afraid to ask any more questions because the crazy is strong with this one. I thought the last few months of bed rest were hell, oh no. The doctor made the mistake of telling him the babies had dropped into position, and all hell broke loose.

Monique threatened to quit at least twice a day, and I think the rest of the staff found my hidey-hole. His grandmother is the only one who seems able to calm him down. I don't think he's slept in three days and I'm afraid to get down off the bed to go pee because he has a fit if I do anything else.

Four children, my ass, this is it. I can't do this again. I'll go nuts from boredom.

‘I hear that sister. Thank heaven this isn't going the whole ten months of I'd shoot myself.'

Why are you complaining? He's not doing it to you.

‘Bless your heart. I see those people running around in your stomach, done sucked what little sense you had clean out your head.'

I can't deal with both of you at the same time, okay?

"Do you like it?"

"There's nothing not to like; it's gorgeous. I've just never heard of a birthing palace before. This is just for me, or do you plan on letting other people use it?"

"Nope, this is all yours. All of our children will be born here."

"You owe me three more pregnancies."

"What? You said four kids. Can't you add?"

"That's not the deal. You had three pregnancies with him; you will have four with me. I don't care how many kids you have at a time."

I opened my mouth, but he beat me to it. "And before you give me any bullshit about your body, your choice. It's my body, and I decided."

‘Bitch, hurry up and push this batch out; you should give him ten more just for saying that shit. Oh, that was hot. I got the vapors.'

* * *

‘Push bitch.'

"Justice, I'm trying."

"Justice, leave your sister alone; she's got enough on her plate as it is."

Oh shit, I said that out loud. Mom, who was on the other side of me holding my hand, stopped what she was doing to stare at him.

"You, you know about Justice?"

"Of course." She got this look on her face that made me forget the pain for a second. "Mom, after everything Marcus has done for me, for us, this is what makes you happy?"

"Well, yeah, anyone who accepts Justice is gold in my book. She used to make me set a place for Justice at the table when she was about four or five, so Justice has been part of the family for a while." She explained to Marcus, but I think she was trying to distract him because his jaw was so tense it looked like it would break.

I've been at it for five hours already because this time, I wanted to do it the natural way. And since the doctor wasn't pushing for a C-section, I didn't foresee any issues.

"I thought that thing you gave her was supposed to help ease the pain. Why is she still hurting so much?"

‘That's right, Daddy, slap that bitch "cause Dag dammit this ain't it. What you need to do is take that soothing incense shit outta that censer and fill it with weed so I can get a contact high in this bitch. What the fuck?'

"What about if I get in the bed behind her? She likes it when I do that. Would that help?"

"If you'd like, it might help to calm her down, but you'll get very dirty."

"Does that even matter?"

He kicked off his shoes and climbed into bed, sitting behind me and massaging my tummy the way I liked, and just in time, too, because a sudden pain racked my body and almost bent me in half.

‘Uh-uh, which level of hell is this? Cut this bitch open and get these fucking crotch goblins the fuck outta here. This ain't it. Looky here, I didn't sign up for this shit. Somebody call the police, this is attempted murder.'

I was laughing so hard at Justice's little meltdown that I pushed my first son out into the world. I felt Marcus tense up at the baby's first cry before his body relaxed completely. "You wanna go see?" I gritted out the words because the next one was pushing against every organ in my body.

"No, not until you're done." He kissed my ear and smoothed the sweat-drenched hair back off my face. I never heard of anyone doing this, but I think they should. It was so comforting being held in his arms like this, with the strength of his chest behind me and the feel of his hands gently caressing as I pushed.

There was some kind of relaxing instrumental music piping through the walls, and the incense, which wasn't too strong, seemed to have a calming effect as well, so I was in a strange place of pain, relaxation, and excitement. I guess the epi was doing its job after all.

Marcus never stopped whispering in my ear the whole time. No matter what else was going on in the room, his whole focus was on me. He soon got me to concentrate on his voice alone and began to paint a picture with words.

He talked about our girls, that's what he calls my daughters, ours. I never knew how much that meant to me until he said it time and again and showed it as well with his actions over these last few months.

Right now, they're out in the Cleopatra room with Monique, Carl, their aunts, uncles, and great-grandparents, along with my dad, waiting for the birth of their siblings. He'd taken time in the last few weeks to spend with each of them separately because he read somewhere that older siblings sometimes hold some form of jealousy when a new child is born into the family, and he was afraid of them feeling slighted in the least.

Now, he was painting a picture of all the fun times we were going to have together as a family. All the places he wanted to share with us, his favorite places from his travels. When our last son came out kicking and screaming, my big, strong husband went limp.

"Oh dear, catch him before he falls." I didn't have the strength to look behind me at Mom's words. Thankfully, the doula moved to my side to hold him in place. Marcus had passed out.

‘The dick and the cooch outta commission, I'm out. These damn gremlins is lethal with their shit, and I ain't fixin' a change no nasty diapers no damn way.' I waved a hand because I didn't have the strength to answer with words.

* * *

MARCUS

* * *

"Hey,little Maverick, Morgan, and Maximilian, remind Aunty Mo-Mo to tell you, guys, about how your big bad daddy fainted when you were born."

"Go away, Monique, they're trying to sleep."

"Then why are you in here?"

Because I can't stop looking at them, and I won't be admitting that out loud because everything I do or say these days is used against me.

Apparently, it's not manly to faint after spending hours watching your woman endure the most hellacious pain I've ever seen anyone go through.

I want to say they're worth it, but I'm not the one who had to go through it. However, their mother and their sisters agree with me. It's only been a couple of weeks since they were born, but they've already taken over my life completely.

I hate having to leave them even for a second and only do it if their mother needs me. She says I'm obsessed and swears that I'll burn out soon if I keep this up, but she has no idea the strength I get just from their existence.

It"s almost as if I myself have been reborn. Everything seems new, and instead of the darkness I've lived with for most of my adult life, I now see something more: promise. I thought I'd lucked out with Justine, that life had finally thrown me a bone after fucking me over. But man, I had no idea that this was waiting for me, too.

There's so much I want to share with them and their mother and sisters, so much I can't wait to see through their young, innocent eyes as they grow. I can't imagine snatching their security away from them. Can't imagine a time when I wouldn't want to be part of their lives and the life I was building with my wife and daughters.

Their birth had unlocked something deep inside me that I didn't know was there. I thought I loved her before, but there was nothing to compare to what I feel for her now. And knowing this, feeling this, I feel even more for the mother who had suffered so much because she loved the wrong man.

I guess I was thinking about her more these days because I wish she'd been here to see her grandkids born. I watch my grandparents with the kids, all of them, and see the joy they get from one of the girls climbing into their lap.

The way they coo over my sons with such love and pride makes it seem like they have a new lease on life because of this new generation. I have so much hope and dreams for them, but the one thing I promise them each time I hold one of them in my arms is that I will never hurt their mother; I will never shatter their foundation the way that man did mine.

It"s time, now that the babies are here, safe and healthy. I need to finish this and put it behind me so that I can move on to a new start with the family I plan to build with my wife.