Chapter 8

CHAPTER 8

" W e are here," the Duke announced.

Christine loosened her grip on her husband. Her fingers were stiff from gripping him the entire journey. She had not said a word, and the Duke did not seem to mind.

She sat up in the coach, stretching every part of her body, and looked out of the window.

"This is my home now," she said.

"You don't have to sound too sad about it, Duchess," the Duke replied.

Christine rubbed a hand over her face and moaned. "I don't believe I will ever get used to this. I can't be a duchess! And look at this home! It is gigantic! And we are married. My life is starting again, and I don't know who I am anymore."

"You will be fine," the Duke said.

"I will be fine! How will I be fine? I didn't want to be married, and now, I will have to start a family, have hobbies, live in a house that is not mine, and meet your family! Why did I not meet them? They were at the wedding!"

"You need to calm down," the Duke said.

"I don't need to?—"

"You need to calm down!" the Duke ordered. "I am saying this for your benefit, not mine. It is a change for me, too, but we don't need to worry about anything except being here. This is your home now, and you are the Duchess whether you like it or not. I tried to introduce you to my mother and sister when we were leaving the chapel, but you had fallen under some spell or voodoo. You need to get a hold of yourself for your own benefit."

"Oh, my goodness!" Christine moaned. "This is not me at all! Have I changed into someone I don't want to be? I do need to get a hold of myself. What am I doing? Why is your house so big? I shall get lost in there."

The Duke sighed. "One step at a time, Christine."

"And what do I call you?" Christine asked. "Your Grace? Or Theodore? Or something else? And what do people call me? Your Grace? Should I correct them if they don't? I feel like I am drowning."

"Then you will drown for a while, but I know the woman you are, and it won't be for long."

Christine tried to breathe but found she was short of breath. "Are you making fun of me?"

"Not right now, but I am sure I will again in time," the Duke said. "I will admit that things have been rushed, but they shall not be rushed anymore. Take all the time you need to settle in here, and you shall want for nothing. There is a room ready for you in the west wing close to my room."

"Oh! Are we not sharing a room?" Christine asked.

"You are married, and you have become meek and needy." The Duke chuckled.

Her toes caught fire first, and that fire shot up her legs, swirled a few times in her stomach and chest, and shot out her mouth. "I am neither meek nor needy," Christine asserted. "I have to change my entire life, and you make fun of me for it. I am extremely glad we are not sharing a room, and you do not have to worry about me, Your Grace, or Theodore, or wherever you wish to be called. I shall be the greatest Duchess these walls have ever seen, and I shall have a list of improvements for the manor by the end of the month."

"There she is," the Duke teased. "There is the woman I married."

"This is all a caper to you, isn't it? You get your jollies from provoking me into doing exactly what you want me to do, don't you?"

"You needed to be prodded in the right direction, and I did that for you. I expect no thanks." The Duke smiled and tilted his head. "And what is life if we can't have a little fun?"

"No, you are right. I must thank you for pushing me in the right direction. I had become meek and needy, and it is laughable that I clung to you in the coach, but I am glad I did, for I learned a valuable lesson."

Christine paused.

"Which is?" the Duke pushed.

"I don't know!" Christine shouted. "That I don't need to cling to anyone. I can make my own way in this world without anyone's help."

"I am glad to hear it," the Duke replied.

Not all of the fire had left her, and kindling was added to the embers in her chest, creating another eruption. "I know you are trying to twist my words and emotions to make it seem like you are winning this argument, but you are not."

"When you are angry like this, it only makes me want to kiss you," the Duke said.

"And when I am this angry, which seems to be all of the time around you, it makes me never want to kiss you, so thank you for enraging me."

"This will be a lot of fun," the Duke snapped.

The coach came to a halt.

"I shall make my own way in this new life," Christine said. She opened the door without waiting for the footman and held her head high as she strode toward the manor.

"I shall see you inside!" the Duke called after her.

It felt like everything he said was intended to invoke an emotion or action, and Christine didn't know what that intention was. She decided to do as she pleased and hoped he didn't get satisfaction from any of it.

Her only wish was that she could stop thinking about the kiss. She wanted to defy him at every turn to prove that she wouldn't be influenced by him, but she ached for another kiss. She only had to find ways to make that happen on her terms.

It is our wedding day, and that means we will be together tonight. That will satisfy me for now.

She almost lost her balance as her stomach swirled at the thought of it. She was also hungry but was not about to ask the Duke for some food. She would explore the house, and she would find her own way, just as she had stated.

The door opened, and the butler nodded curtly toward her as she approached.

"Welcome, Your Grace," he said.

"Thank you," Christine replied. "What is your name?"

"Hawthorne, Your Grace."

"Thank you, Hawthorne," Christine said as she walked by.

A large woman stood in the main foyer.

"Welcome, Your Grace," the woman said.

"You are the housekeeper?" Christine asked as she walked toward the hallway facing the door.

"I am," the woman said, walking with Christine. "Mrs. Biggins."

"Mrs. Biggins, I am hungry and would like some food."

"Of course, Your Grace. I shall have some food brought to the breakfast room if that is to your liking."

"That is to my liking," Christine said.

"Shall I show you to the breakfast room?" the housekeeper asked.

"I am sure I will find it," Christine said.

"Very good, Your Grace."

Christine kept on straight ahead, and the housekeeper diverted to the right to take care of the food.

Christine let out a long breath. She smiled.

I make a very fine duchess.

She couldn't help but feel pleased with herself. She had no idea where anything was, but she knew she would find everything eventually. The house was intimidating from the outside, but she assumed most things would be in the same place as her home—only there would be more of everything, and the rooms would be bigger.

Christine kept moving, fearing that she would collapse into a heap the moment she stopped. She explored the first and second levels, meeting the staff of the house and finding out as many names as possible. She felt her heart beating quicker every time someone approached, both hoping and fearing it was the Duke.

There was something about him that disarmed her. She did not know how to deal with him yet.

Christine found herself back on the ground level, and she felt calmness fall over her for the first time since arriving. The manor was massive, but there was a deep beauty contained within. The decor and furnishings were old, but they were well taken care of. It was a home that was lived in and full of character.

Christine slowed her walk, her body releasing the tension that had built up over the past three weeks and threatened to strangle her. She turned?—

Christine gasped and almost knocked the young woman over. "Adeline!"

"Yes!" Adeline gasped, her chest still heaving from almost barging into Christine. "How did you know?"

"I… you must be. I saw you at the chapel… I think. I know His Grace has a sister, and you are not dressed like help, so I assumed you must be."

"I am," she said. "You look… I apologize for saying this, but you look utterly lost."

Christine laughed. "I know exactly where I am, but for the life of me, I can't find the breakfast room. It has eluded me for the past fifteen minutes, and I refused to be led there. I am ready to admit defeat."

"Yes, that breakfast room is troublesome," Adeline said. "It often wanders around for some reason. How about we check where it usually is and see if it has returned from its wanderings."

Christine laughed. Her life had been turned upside down, but she had found a friend in the house; she could feel it. She did not care if the Duke's sister never counted her as a friend; she was immediately drawn to Adeline.

More of her stress dripped from her shoulders like stray raindrops. She walked with Adeline, her lighthouse in the darkness.

"Thank you," Christine said.

"Don't worry; the breakfast room does this to all of us."

"No, not for that, for… I'm not feeling myself today, and you have made me feel very welcome already. Thank you."

"Well, it was easy to do so," Adeline said. "It was a wonderful wedding, and I hope to have a wedding like that someday."

Christine looked to the side as they walked, intrigued by the young woman. Her wedding with the Duke had been as plain as could be, and they did not follow the ceremony with a celebration. Obviously, the young woman was in love with the notion of being married more than the wedding day itself. There was a certain sweetness in that.

"You are a beautiful young woman," Christine said. "Have you debuted yet?"

"No, not yet," Adeline replied. "Theo told me I will soon now that he is married."

"You will, and I shall help you." Christine found more relief in the task. She would focus on that and not have to think about anything else for a while.

"You will? That would mean the world to me."

"I helped my younger sister to debut, and it was so much fun."

"I would appreciate that a lot," Adeline said. "Mother does not like to go out often and spends much of her time at the country estate. I know she tries, but it is hard for her."

"My mother is much the same," Christine said.

"Then we have something in common. I have very much enjoyed meeting you, Your Grace," Adeline said. She gestured toward the open door leading to the breakfast room.

"It was right here all along," Christine said. "Please do me one favor. If you call me Your Grace, it makes me feel weird. Will you please call me by my name instead?"

"I can do that," Adeline said. "I hope you enjoy your food. The cook has been here since I was born, and the food is always delicious."

"You have made me feel more at home than anyone else ever could have," Christine admitted.

"I am glad," Adeline said. She shuffled a little and hesitated. "I, um… if I were ever to need some advice, do you think I could talk with you?"

"You can talk with me about anything," Christine assured.

Adeline hesitated again but finally smiled and skipped off.

Christine entered the breakfast room and took a seat at the table facing the door. She watched Adeline make her way down the long corridor and disappear around the corner.

You have a secret that you haven't shared with anyone else, don't you?