Chapter 10

CHAPTER 10

T heodore paced back and forth in the sunroom. The large windows let in a lot of light, but it did not warm him. A coldness had settled in his bones, and he could not rid himself of it.

Footstep approached from behind, and he did not need to turn to know who it was. The heaviness informed him that Percival had arrived. He did not have to avoid and evade the soft steps of his wife. Theodore had never been one to shy away from a fight, but this was not a fight. This was something different, and he did not want to face her.

"Wait until you hear about the woman I had in my bed last night," Percival announced as he entered the room. "I like to think I am an animal in bed, but she was something else."

Theodore felt the wave of nausea pulse through him. He spun around to face his friend and quickly spotted the maid by the door with a tray of refreshments.

"No, that won't do," Theodore said to the maid. "Take the tray back to the kitchens and have them add more meat and cheese. Have Tompkins bring the tray back to us."

"Of course, Your Grace," the maid said.

There was enough food on the tray, but Theodore wanted to spare the maid from having to hear whatever else Percival said.

"I feel honored," Percival said, misconstruing the situation. "If we are to eat so much, we must have more alcohol, too. I don't see glasses anywhere."

Theodore observed Percival for a moment.

How did we ever become friends? Did I gravitate to him because he is so unlikable? There was a time when I thought he was fun.

"I have some cognac on the cart," Theodore said. "Help yourself, Percival."

Percival placed a hand on his chest. "My goodness! I am to serve myself in your house?"

"You live in bachelor lodgings in the city," Theodore reminded him. "You serve yourself most of the time."

"Yes, but it is far better to be served by a fine young maiden in your home." He made his way over to the cart. "Why do you think I come here?"

"Sometimes, I do not know," Theodore said.

"What has gotten into you?" Percival asked.

He poured himself a drink but stopped short of pouring a second when Theodore waved his hand in the air.

"Something has really gotten into you," Percival said. "I shall have to drink for the both of us." He drained the glass in one mouthful and poured another generous amount.

Theodore watched his friend, and it was as if he were seeing him for the very first time. Deep in his heart, he knew the reason why he was friends with Percival. It was much easier this way.

"You are a married man!" Percival announced. "I never thought I would see you settle down with a woman, but you have chosen a fine one. Those breasts of hers?—"

The hairs on the back of Theodore's neck prickled at the mention of his wife's body. "Stop!" he ordered. "Talk about other women, but not Christine."

"My goodness! I didn't realize you were so taken with her." Percival laughed and took another drink of his cognac. "When you rushed into the marriage, I assumed it was arranged for some reason." Percival gasped theatrically. "Have you fallen in love with her already?"

The thought of talking about his marriage or his wife made Theodore feel nauseated. He did not love her, and the marriage was one of convenience, but he didn't want to delve into any of that.

Is it the person I talk with or the subject itself?

"Tell me about the woman you were in bed with last night," Theodore said, needing to change the subject.

He avoided talking about his wife just as he avoided his wife.

"Ah, now we are talking." Percival hunched a little and stalked through the room like a rat on its hind legs. "Oh, you would have loved this woman. Her breast wobbled like two blancmanges when she was on her back, and let me tell you, they were twice as delicious."

Theodore had heard Percival describe his sexual encounters on multiple occasions (and he had done the very same), but he found the description boring.

"When I spread her legs, she practically begged me to pleasure her." Percival noticed the footman return with the tray and waited for him to place the tray down before going to him and nudging him gently. "This chap knows exactly what I am talking about."

"That will be all, Tompkins," Theodore said, excusing his footman from the embarrassing situation.

"And the noises she made when I finally gave her what she wanted," Percival said. "Ah, but you must have heard them recently!" Percival smiled as he closed in on Theodore. "Tell me, did she scream and moan on your wedding night, or was she much?—"

Theodore suddenly lunged forward and took Percival by the collar. He pushed his friend back into the wall, almost spilling the drink in his hand.

"I told you not to talk about my wife!" Theodore warned.

"Get the hell off me!" Percival shouted.

Theodore kept Percival pinned to the wall for a moment more—he was the stronger of the two—before he let him go and took a step back.

Percival flung his hands up, making a show of force but not stepping closer to Theodore. He strode off toward the tray, downing his second drink and taking up a large chunk of bread.

"What has gotten into you?" Percival's voice has a slight tremor in it. He bit into the bread and chewed it with his mouth open.

What has gotten into me? I don't know if I know.

"I told you not to mention my wife," the Duke replied stoically. "And why do you have to talk about women in such a way?"

"In such a way?" Percival spoke with his mouth full, and wet crumbs of bread flew across the room. "In the way we have always spoken? You have been married for two days, and you really have changed, haven't you? We have always spoken this way, and that includes you, Your Grace ! Is this really how it will be from now on? You are married, so that makes you better than me?"

I have always been better than you. We have both slept with women and drank and gambled and done stupid things, but you have always lacked basic respect. Not only for others but for yourself.

"Your lack of response tells me everything," Percival stated. "I could have gone to White's or another club, but I came here to check on my friend, and this is the welcome I get?"

"You came here for the free drinks and food, and we both know it," Theodore spat.

Percival tossed the rest of his bread down onto the tray. He eyed the decanter of cognac but resisted going back for more.

"Ah, so that is how it is, is it?" Percival asked. "What has happened to you? Does she have control of you now? You can't bed other women or go out drinking? Do you have to be a good husband?"

Theodore stormed forward. "I do as I please, and well you know it!"

Percival scurried back against the wall, fearing another attack.

Theodore stopped short and rubbed his head in his hands. He looked at his friend, and there was a similar look as Christine had displayed when he had sent her from his room.

I am angry at myself, not at him or her!

"I apologize, Percival," Theodore said. "You are right. I am not myself today, and it is because of these changes. I rushed into marriage, and it will take some getting used to. You do not need to leave."

"Well, I had no intention of leaving." Percival smiled and went for the decanter of cognac.

"Pour me one," Theodore ordered.

"So, she does not have you wrapped around her finger?" Percival asked.

"She does not have command of me," Theodore replied.

That was not strictly true. She did not have command of him, but she did weigh on him. The reason he had sent her away from his room was the same reason he kept Percival around as a friend. He could not get close to anyone.

Percival was an awful person, but he was a good reminder of the man he needed to be to avoid pain.

Theodore went to Percival and took the glass of cognac. He clinked his glass against Percival's and took a large drink.

"I have had no time to go into town and find a good woman to bring back to my bed," Theodore told his friend. "Come on, regale me with your past conquests so that I might live vicariously through you, and that will tide me over until I have some pleasure of my own."

"Ah, you are back. I knew a visit from your very best friend would do the trick. Let me start at the beginning. Oh, the stars were twinkling in the sky like never before, and I spotted the young damsel in distress…"

Theodore was not listening to the story, but he did not have to. He knew the end of the story before Percival started telling it. Still, it was a good distraction from his life.

Twenty-four years ago was the last time he had felt pain, and he had locked it up with his other emotions. When she had come to his room, those emotions had almost been unlocked, and he craved her body under his touch once more. Keeping Percival around helped to keep those feelings at bay. They were partners in crime.

Theodore would never let himself feel that pain again.