23. Raven

Chapter twenty-three

Raven

I step out of the dining room with a mix of emotions. The eggplant parmesan barely registers on my taste buds as my mind is consumed by a single thought—my baby.

The reality of it all is sinking in with each passing second. After being considerably sleepy and hit by bouts of weird cravings for the past few days, I’m astounded that Ezra is still oblivious to my condition. Maybe I’m just lucky. Or I’m terribly good at hiding. I wonder how long it’ll last before Ezra finally catches on.

My mind constantly revolves around the dilemma— the one dilemma I’ve had since I found out: should I keep this secret from Ezra or finally confess?

I don’t know how he’ll take the news. The man is barely recovering from his past, and out of nowhere, I’ll shove the news down his throat?

What if he doesn’t want it? What if this baby changes everything? More importantly, what if it takes away any hope of freedom for me?

I may not be able to guess Ezra’s reaction if he hears, but I’m smart enough to know I’m carrying the child of a don. That in itself is a threat to my freedom.

Keeping it to myself feels like the only way to hold onto that freedom. If I tell him, I might lose it.

The thought of being trapped all over again sends a chill down my spine, but so does the fact that he may be mad if he finds out about the pregnancy on his own.

As I make my way back to the bedroom, my heart feels heavy, and the questions don’t stop running through my head. All I can focus on is how to navigate this tangled mess of emotions.

When I round the corner and step into the hallway that leads to Ezra’s bedroom, I spot the usual guards stationed outside. But what catches my attention is Elio, casually leaning against the doorframe. My eyebrows shoot up in surprise as it is strange to see him in the house at this hour.

He glances at me, his expression unreadable. I can’t help but wonder what’s going on as his sudden presence makes me curious.

“Elio,” I say, as I approach him cautiously. “Do you…ummm…need something?”

I half expect him not to respond. We’ve never spoken like this before… and I never called him by his name.

“Not at all,” he responds, in a curt tone.

Hmmm. Ezra must be inside if he’s waiting out here.

I nod in response to his words, even though a knot tightens in my stomach for some reason.

Pushing the door open, I step inside the room. The familiar scent of Ezra hits me instantly—a mix of cologne and leather that lingers in the air, rich and masculine. I’ve gotten used to this scent, so much so that it feels like part of the room itself.

Ezra stands by the closet, half-hidden behind the door, his tall frame leaning slightly as he rummages through the shelves.

His brow is furrowed, lips pressed in concentration, hands moving with purpose as he moves things around. He’s clearly looking for something, and the tension in his posture says it’s important.

“Hey,” I call out as I head toward the bed.

“Hey,” he replies, without looking up. His voice is deep but distracted, and he is still focused on his search.

I reach the bed, and right before I sit on it, I freeze, a certain realization crossing my mind. Turning ever so slowly, my gaze darts back to him, and my heart races. He’s searching in the exact spot where I stashed the pregnancy test kit.

Panic grips me, alarm bells going off in my head. I need to stop him…distract him… anything…before he stumbles upon it.

My mind races for a solution, and before I can think it through, I walk quickly to the closet, forcing a cheerful tone into my voice.

“Hey!” I say, louder this time, positioning myself right in front of him. “What are you looking for? Want some help?”

He glances up, surprise flickering across his face. “Uh, no. I’m good,” he replies, but I can’t let him brush me off.

Before I can stop myself, I step forward and gently nudge him aside, diving into the closet. The gravity of my impulsive action crashes down on me. What was I thinking? I’m too obvious.

I turn slowly to find Ezra staring at me, his eyes wide with shock. The expression on his face is a mix of surprise and confusion. I laugh nervously, the shaky sound lingering in the air.

“Just helping you look for your stuff!” I quickly start searching through every spot in the closet—except the one where I hid the pregnancy test under the cloth.

“You don’t have to push me out of the way to help.” He raises an eyebrow, a hint of amusement creeping in. “Plus, you don’t even know what I’m looking for.”

My hand movement immediately comes to a pause, and I blink with wide eyes like a deer caught in headlights.

Think, Raven!

“Right. Haha!” I let out an exaggerated ‘ah’ as I straighten up, then clap my hands together with a big, cheesy grin plastered on my face. “So why don’t you go ahead to tell me exactly what you’re looking for?”

He holds my gaze for a few moments and folds his strong arms across his clothed chest, a faint smile tugging at his lips. His folded hands draw my attention to his appearance, distracting me from my nerves for a second.

My gaze drops slightly to the simple yet body-fitting polo he wears over plain pants. The polo hugs his torso, highlighting his broad shoulders and well-defined muscles.

I struggle to draw my gaze back up, my mind suddenly drifting to the dark shenanigans that had occurred in the room a few days back.

The helplessness mixed with excitement I felt while tied up and blindfolded, his powerful thrusts driving deep, and the way he took control of me… It’s a level of roughness I had never experienced before during intimacy. I can't deny that I found it thrilling.

Focus Raven. Your freedom is at stake here!

I shut off my thoughts and focus solely on Ezra, which is a hard thing to do. Finally, he nods and slowly unfolds his arms.

“I’m looking for a small black box. It’s highly unlikely that you’ve seen it, though…” he trails off.

I turn back to the closet and begin searching again. In a minute, I spot the item next to the cloth covering the kit. Swallowing, I pick up the box.

“Is this it?” I ask, holding up the box in front of me.

“Yeah, that’s it.” A look of surprise covers his face.

He steps forward and takes it from me. “Funny how I’ve been searching for this, yet you found it so quickly,” he says, glancing at me.

I let out a nervous chuckle. “I know, right? But when we're in a hurry, we don’t always find what we’re searching for.”

A brief silence hangs in the air as the mafia boss studies me.

“Are you alright? You’re acting a little weird,” Ezra points out, his eyes softening as he reaches out to gently cup my cheek.

“I’m fine.” I force a laugh, but it’s weak even to my ears. “I’m just so bored here doing nothing all day. That’s all there is to it really.”

I tell him the only lie that comes to mind. He watches me closely for a moment as if trying to see through my brave facade. Then he nods, accepting my answer, and turns to leave.

Just as he wraps his hand around the knob, he pauses and glances back at me. “You can go outside today if you’re bored. I’ll let the guards know. Then you can go into town with them.”

For a moment, I forget my predicament, and I nod eagerly. “Really? Thank you!”

“You still have my black card from the last time?” he inquires, raising a thick brow slightly.

“Yes.”

He nods and walks out the door. The moment he’s gone, I let out a shaky breath, my heart pounding with relief.

I wait until I don’t pick up his receding footsteps before taking out the pregnancy test sticks from inside the closet.

As I stare at them, I can’t stop the gnawing feeling in my chest. I should just tell Ezra once and for all. I sigh and sink onto the floor, clutching the test sticks tightly to my chest.

Tears prick the corners of my eyes as I think about the next few weeks when the pregnancy progresses. My chest tightens at the thought of carrying the weight of it all alone. I know I can’t hide forever. Eventually, I’ll have to face him.

I swipe at my cheeks, catching the tears streaking down my face.

Stupid pregnancy hormones .

My gaze falls again to the test sticks in my hands, finally coming to a decision to wait for the right moment to inform him.

With a sigh, I get up and tuck the test sticks into one of my nightdresses. That way, Ezra never finds it until I’m ready for him to know and to deal with the consequences.

Walking over to the bed, I pull open the bedside drawer and grab the burner phone. As I unlock the screen, I immediately scroll to my chat with Harper from last night. My thumb hovers over the screen as I re-read her messages, the ones where she expressed her shock at finally hearing from me after weeks of silence.

I’d told her I was okay; there was no need to fret or call the cops and that I would explain all the details to her later. It had taken a lot for her to believe me, but she finally did.

When Ezra handed me the device earlier, I didn’t know how to react at first—part of me thought it was some kind of cruel joke. But then I realized he really meant it.

Reconnecting with Harper made me realize how much I missed her.

I bite down on my bottom lip when I scroll to her last message: When are you coming home? A sinking feeling lingers in my chest, guilt gnawing at me.

I shake my head and decide to think of a proper response after I return.

Quickly, I change out of my knee-length gown into a simple tee and jeans. It’s time to breathe fresh air— to feel like a person again.

The sun shines brightly as I step outside, wrapping me in its warmth. I take a moment to soak it all in—the blue sky above, the chirping birds, and the distant sound of laughter. Okay, I’m overexaggerating…the laughter thing is in my head, but it will be real soon.

Two guards approach me. “All set, miss?” the taller one asks.

“Oh yes,” I nod, gripping my satchel.

They guide me to a black Range Rover parked in the driveway. My steps falter when I take in the sleek car. The last time it was a different one– another expensive one– and now this? Fuck, he must be stinking rich to own expensive cars and mansions. Stinking rich to casually give me a black card.

I roll my eyes at my own thoughts and resume walking. Of course. His wealth runs deeper than I initially thought. The stinking rich, billionaire mafia don.

I climb into the back seat before a guard shuts the door. Then the engine roars to life, and we speed out of the property… into town. The town pulses with the same vibrant energy as it did last week. The trees dance softly to the gentle rush of wind beneath a brilliant blue sky.

“Where would you like to go, miss?” The guard in the driver seat questions a moment later, glancing at me through the rearview mirror.

I think about it for a few seconds before answering. “The bookstore, if there’s one around.”

I see him nod slightly, and in no time, the car pulls up in front of a bookstore.

We get out of the car, and as I walk to the door, I notice one of them remains by the vehicle while the other follows me at a close distance. I don’t give it much thought and step inside, the smell of old books and polished wood wrapping around me comfortably. The storekeeper, a tall young lady, acknowledges me with a smile, and I nod in return.

Wandering through the aisles, I run my fingers over the spines of books. My heart skips a beat when I spot a book that undoubtedly is about the mafia. I chuckle softly to myself, marveling at how odd it is to be living in a world I never once imagined I’d find myself in.

I take the book from the shelf and open it, flipping through the pages. I’m halfway into browsing through it when a thud echoes a few meters away. I look up and catch a glimpse of a blonde man in the distance, hunched over as he picks up a book from the floor.

My breath hitches as I recall the events of last week. It’s him! The strange man from the pharmacy—the one who seemed to know everything about me.

I look at the guard who stands at a distance, pretending to check out a book so he probably does not look suspicious.

I take the chance to step closer to the blonde man.

“Excuse me,” I say, tapping the man on the shoulder.

He turns around, and my eyes widen slightly. It’s not him. “Sorry! I mistook you for someone else.” I blurt out, my cheeks flushing with embarrassment.

Hastily, I make my way to the checkout counter and pay for the mafia book in my hand. In the other line, I see a mother cradling her child, tenderly hushing the baby to sleep.

I can’t help my next thoughts. Is that how I’ll be when I eventually give birth to this child?

Oh, wait---no, that won’t happen if Ezra finds out. Instead, I’ll be locked away forever.

A frustrated groan escapes my lips as the dilemma of whether to tell Ezra or not dances through my mind once again.

As I leave the store and head back to the car with the guard, my gaze lands on another man with blonde hair. I shake my head slightly, a small groan exiting my lips.

Why am I even searching for him? It’s not like I can just up and leave the man I love and carry a child for?

Hold on…

I come to a slow stop before the Rover. Suddenly my heart starts to race as just one emotion circles my heart.

Love?

I let out a shaky breath, reaching forward to steady myself against the vehicle. I can’t seem to wrap my head around the fact that I truly do love him. How do I even know it’s real and not some twisted trick of Stockholm syndrome?

“Miss, are you alright?” I hear one of the guards ask behind me, his voice distant, barely registering.

I ignore him, my gaze fixed on the car window. Freedom is just within reach—Harper.

I could run, disappear, and reclaim my life. But the truth is, I’m not even considering it. Not really.

Because I don’t want to leave him now.

Because I think… I love him.