18

Mabel

I was confused and not sure what to think about much when Andre left that afternoon, but he had to get back and handle too much. As much as I wanted to see Ian and make sure he was okay, I was still confused and a bit upset about what he'd done as well.

Plus, they now had even more on their plates to handle. The mess with the Minister of Finance was all over the capital. There were knights from different families that had acted against the police and Ian's knights that day, and it was clear they were making a point against the king.

What point exactly I wasn't sure, but it backfired.

It backfired massively. People were completely on the king's side, even those who didn't like him or were neutral. No one wanted anarchy, and the Minister of Finance had been committing crimes.

And they were crimes that hurt people. Normal people. Those budgets were the ones that would have helped the police. The hospitals. Areas suffering from food shortages or disasters. One from a border dispute and raids. Another from a flood.

So the man—and those supporting him—was insane to think this was the matter to try and stand up to the king on.

He cut out needed items from budgets to make other ministers seem like they were out of touch or didn't care. Yes, they were people who were in the king's party or neutral, but the king hadn't done anything wrong.

The ministers that were affected accepted their mistakes and donated a large sum of money to help the founding of a new order of doctors. The goal was the best of the best doctors would work at the kingdom hospitals, specialists even who traveled between areas to learn as much as possible.

They would train for years that way, and in the end would be the ultimate authority to help the most severe cases and be at the forefront of medicine at the capital. They would be employed at the kingdom's hospitals, and that was where the fines from the ministers would go to because that was the cause they wanted to focus on—helping people after this hurt too many.

It was well received, especially when it was "leaked" that there might be new medicines available to the kingdom because of these doctors and the rigorous training. All very hush-hush, but these doctors would have the highest scruples and morals unlike too many of the quack noble doctors or ones found in back alleys willing to do anything for a price.

And then it turned out the Minister of Finance was misappropriating funds and filling his family's accounts by cutting corners on other ministries. I was fairly sure most wanted him chained up and stoned after that.

So to say Andre and Ian were busy over the next week was an understatement. But we did finally get a chance to meet, and while they had thought to see me separately, I thought it better that the three of us have a proper sit-down.

"This is awkward," I acknowledged once they had both arrived and we were sitting to have lunch on a Saturday. The week had been long and exhausting for them from the way they were both acting and the bags under their eyes.

"Not at all," they both said together, sounding anything but calm.

We all shared a glance but then chuckled.

Of course, it was awkward.

"We just have not had a chance to talk either," Andre admitted. "And with everything that happened…" He blew out a harsh breath. "My office looks more like a paper mill at this moment and my eyes hurt from lack of sleep and reading over it all."

"Well said," Ian drawled.

"Then, after lunch, we are going to my workroom and I will help you both," I said firmly, making it clear that they better not argue.

They didn't. Shockingly, but I realized they were grateful and too tired to be stubborn.

"I am also a bit afraid of what you are going to say to us," Andre admitted.

"You did not cheat," I said firmly, deciding to start there when I knew he was worried about that. "You have sent enough presents to make it clear you are worried you should feel guilty. You are right and we did not define our relationships and I was the one who did not want to. Plus, I cannot judge you for kissing Ian when I do as well."

Ian choked on his bite, thumping himself in the chest a few times and then finally swallowing. "You really just said that."

"Well, it's the main point of my feelings." I gave a half shrug. There really was no other way to say what I was feeling.

I also understood the desire to kiss Ian. I had it at the moment as we sat there.

And Andre.

"However, going forward, I would like to clarify a few things so we understand each other better," I continued.

"No other men," they both blurted.

I glanced between them and a giggle slipped out. "You think I could ever handle a third man when you both drive me crazy most days?"

"That's about what I said, but you are beautiful, darling," Andre said firmly. "Every time you are out, I hear from the guards how heads turn and there is more interest in you. And you did not even realize that Raymond Matthias watches you like prey he has yet to taste. He wants you."

I shivered. "I find that hard to believe, but I do trust the opinions given to me, so I will listen. I never want to be alone with him again knowing that."

"Good," they said together, sharing a look that they were on the same page.

"Yes, well, I promise no other men," I drawled getting us back on point. "But I was hoping no other women for you both." I cleared my throat when they didn't say anything. "I know that's selfish when I am still with you both but—"

"No!" they shouted together.

I glanced between them and sighed. "Are you of one mind today? I thought it was easier to clear the air with both of you, but if you are going to—"

"You keep shocking us, lovely," Ian chuckled. "This was not what I thought—I did not see the conversation going this way. I do not want another woman. I am fine saying that. It's fair if I do not want you with another man. Not including Andre. You were interested when we met—the same time we met."

"Plus, you are interested in him as well," I said.

"Yes. Wait—no."

"No?" Andre asked.

"This is why the three of us need to talk together," I muttered. I held up a hand to hold them off. "I understand you are both confused about each other. I am fine with things happening between you two. Anything that happens stays between the three of us. That is what I wanted to say."

"That is very open-minded of you, darling," Andre muttered.

"So was you accepting I had feelings for Ian. Granted, I did not know you understood his charm that way but still, you knew I needed my freedom. I know you both need to resolve this. However it happens and not feel confined by the relationship you are already in. You loved each other. It ended but then was ruined because of lies not yours. And you have spent years in each other's lives being close but…"

I wasn't sure how to say it without poking that they had both been idiots. If they'd ever simply sat down and ever really talked instead of fought or ignored their past, this could have been resolved years ago.

Then again, they might not have been open to that either with all the pain they'd once been in.

Or they would have figured out a way to have made it work and they would never have given me a second look. As horrible as it sounded, I was glad that wasn't the initial outcome since I had strong feelings for them.

Yes, I was that selfish this time. Not that I wanted them to have suffered needlessly, but I thought I might be worth the wait and problems they had before they found me?

What did I really know?

"So you do not want me?" Andre asked Ian.

"It's not that simple," Ian whispered after a moment. "Much has changed, but the core of why I ended the relationship has not." He gave Andre a pained look. "I could never be so horrible to you and treat you with—"

"Fuck, Ian, you are always at such extremes," Andre growled as he jumped to his feet. "I could not be in an openly gay relationship either at my position. Now I am getting a title. I would have to hide too. I never cared about hiding it! You did, and you made that decision for both of us. Do not you see how that's just as bad as making the decision for both of us to hide it?"

I mentally winced when Ian looked at me for help. "I agree with him." I reached over and took his hand to take the sting out of his words. "Ian, I was honest with you from the beginning. I do not think I could ever marry again. No matter the person or—I cannot give up that freedom. I am an adult in the eyes of the law. I would lose that to become my husband's.

"That's fair to say. It's just as Andre said. Just as you said." I hurried on when he opened his mouth. "But I discussed it with you, and you made the decision to stay in my life and see what is here. That's what you did wrong. You made the decision for both of you that if you could not have a relationship out in public, it was not worth having. That was the mistake."

Ian frowned and pulled his hand away. I didn't take offense, more like he needed to be in his own space to deal with this. He gave Andre a confused look. "But you would have had to lie to everyone you loved so much. You said they were everything and you could not ever do that."

Andre's face softened. "You are right. I did say that when we were kids. I even understand your decision better now. We should have discussed that better and if it was something we could both handle. If it was worth it to us." He waited until Ian nodded. "But they are all gone now, Ian."

"Are you saying you want to be with me? Me and Mabel or…" He glanced at me. "This would be a thrice? A three-way couple?"

Andre opened his mouth but then closed it again.

"He's not saying that," I answered for him. "I think he's saying stop closing doors for him in his face and figure out how to get over your past before deciding on the future you could both have together on your own."

"Yes, thank you," Andre said before blinking at me. "Clearly, we need you. Most importantly because I am falling in love with you and I cannot imagine my life without you, but you are the sanity we needed to even consider being together."

It was my turn to simply blink at him before my face flushed roaring-fire hot. "How you can say that so easily, like the sandwich is lovely, is beyond me."

"I was always open to the idea of us sharing her because our positions are too much and I would leave her alone too often for my sanity," Ian muttered. "I like the idea even better if I was free to join you both in bed and I had you in my life again. But I agree that apparently the piece we were always missing from our relationship was Mabel. Not simply a woman, but her."

"Well, I appreciate what you are saying, and I am taking that as the compliment that it is meant to be," I muttered, trying to subtly fan my face. "But that was not really what I thought we should talk about. I wanted us to clear the air and settle—we have too much going on, and when I heard you were both in danger being so upset about—it seemed silly."

"It was not silly," Ian said firmly. "Your feelings are never silly, lovely."

"Agreed." Andre came closer and kissed my hair before sitting back down. "And I am sorry. I thought you understood—I did not mean to trick you or deceive you. I thought you knew it was for us."

"And I did not know how to explain it and not embarrass you when I realized you thought it was like asking for a kiss," Ian added. "The fault is really mine. I thought… I do not know what I thought really. The blood was not in my brain. It was all in my groin and focused on you and how incredibly seductive and alluring you were being."

"Behave," I whispered. "Yes, I understand, but we have to be able to discuss these things. I could have started trouble for poor Kathy, but luckily she's amazing and promises we will laugh at it one day. For now… I overreacted and—"

"Mabel, darling, you have true horrors in your past," Andre said gently. "You did not overreact. You did not throw a fit or slap me in public. You were in pain. I am sorry that I did not know how to help you and left it to Kathy. I was scared to make it worse."

I knew that from what Kathy had told me. "I think that was honestly the best way to handle it. I do not know the answer either. Kathy said she would have been mortified also and it takes time to heal. She said it took her years to not be so sensitive about not having a mother when people used to use that wound as a way to hurt her. I agree that it will simply take time."

"Of course. We have wounds as well and understand," Ian murmured. "However we can help, and just tell us what is best."

"I think we should move on from it as long as I can trust you will be honest with me going forward," I told them. "I think we have learned that I am more na?ve than any of us might have guessed and definitely more gullible than I like to be."

"I do not think it's being gullible when it's someone you trust," Ian argued. "I would trust you if you told me something completely off about women's things. You would know about it more than me." He shrugged as he picked his sandwich back up. "I think it's rather admirable that you are able to trust at all after what you have been through. I am rather jealous of that at times."

"You are?" I hedged, surprised, and then noticed Andre felt the same even as he pretended not to and focused on his food.

Ian nodded. "I spent my whole life not feeling like I could trust anyone and they only saw me as what they could get from me—how they could use me. Even my own father."

"Not your grandfather. Not Kylie," Andre said gently.

"No, not them," Ian agreed but then frowned. "Well, not always. I mean, Grandfather hoped I would keep Father in line after he was gone. There is always some of that in any relationship. There has to be."

"But it makes you jaded," I muttered frowning.

"Yes, because I had more outside opinions and influences. You were sheltered and kept that way purposefully, so you knew no better. You were conditioned. I was shown the evils all around in the hopes I would trust only my father and do what he wanted. It backfired. Just as your being kept ignorant backfired as you strived to learn as much as you could."

"I never thought about it like that," I admitted.

"Because you never give yourself enough credit, lovely," Ian said easily. "You are amazing. Always. How you handle so much and how far you have come. You see what happened and are down on yourself. I see the fact you have not had such an issue until now as a testament of your strength and emotional health being much better than the rest of us."

My jaw fell open. That was maybe one of the nicest things anyone had ever said about me and I had nothing to respond to it. Andre agreed with Ian, and they discussed it more as if they were talking about the weather instead of giving me a bouquet of compliments.

It went on so long that I realized we'd finished eating and I had no idea what my food had really even tasted like.

"Are we settled with the topics you wanted to discuss, lovely?" Ian asked once all the plates were stacked on the cart and we stood. "Because there is a topic I did want to discuss."

"Yes, I think we did," I muttered, studying him closely. "Whatever you want to talk about we can. Of course. I wanted this for all three of us, not just me."

He nodded and slid his arm around me. "What are you going to allow now that we are in a committed relationship? I want to start planning how we are finally going to have you fully. I got very jealous to know you touched his cock first. I do not want to be that petty with you again, and you said we should discuss these things."

"I do not think that was exactly what I meant," I whispered as he pulled me closer so our bodies were pressed together.

"You are always so fucking impatient, Ian," Andre grumbled… As he molded his body to my back, making me a sandwich between them.

And I was fairly sure they were still hungry.

But not for food.

Andre placed a soft kiss on my neck. "I want to stay right where we are. I want to kiss every inch of her in front of the fireplace too. We can lick her together. There's so much still to show her. I want her to sit on my face and drown in her juices."

"Andre!" I gasped as his hand cupped my breast. "It's the middle of the day."

"So?" they chuckled together.

For the love of the goddess.

"I agree that this is a nice place to stay for a while, but women need time to get comfortable, and our Mabel likes to have plans," Ian defended. "I thought maybe if I said next month we might make love to her together so there was no jealousy of who had her virginity, that might be best." He chuckled when Andre groaned. "I thought you'd like the idea."

"What about you, darling?" Andre asked as his tongue danced along my skin and his hand squeezed my breast. "Say it for us, Mabel. Say it now for both of us. Let us have you for dessert."

"Shit, yes, even better," Ian growled before kissing me. His large hand cupped my face and his tongue pushed right into my mouth.

But I didn't say anything even when he stopped kissing me.

"Wait, no, we do not deserve that do we, sweet Mabel?" he asked, searching my eyes. "No, not when we were bad. We should pay penance." He smiled when my lips parted and my breathing got heavy. I liked the sound of that. "And penance is best on one's knees."

Ian dropped to his knees right in front of me and lifted my skirts, staring up at me as he touched me intimately. "Is this cunt only ours now, Mabel?"

"Fuck, please say yes, darling," Andre begged as he undid the snaps of my dress. "We will pay all the penance. I agree. We were bad and should treat you better. Just say yes and your cunt is ours."

Yes, only yours," I gasped. I was rewarded with Ian's long fingers inside of me and Andre running his teeth over the sensitive skin of my neck. "Kiss me?"

"Gladly," Andre groaned and mashed his lips to mine. He kissed me as Ian touched me and my body never felt more alive. "Let me take off your dress, darling. Let us see your beautiful body so we can please you more. Please?"

"Give us such a wonderful gift, Mabel," Ian added.

"Yes." I wasn't crazy enough to say no to that. I felt like I blinked and my dress and corset were gone, leaving me standing there in my garters, stockings, and heels only.

"I just creamed myself," Ian groaned. "Take down her hair."

"Do not let her get caught," Andre argued. "Her hair down is for nighttime and the morning." He chuckled when he cupped my breasts. "So sensitive. So perfect." He pressed his lips to my ear. "Whimper if you want Ian to lick your delicious cunt, darling. I want to see him do it."

Yes, I whimpered.

I whimpered the whole time he did it and only stayed standing because Andre held me up when I climaxed. He lifted me up when it was over and then moved me to the floor where Ian had set up some pillows from the sofa.

"She's perfect," Andre said as they stared down at me.

"She is." Ian smirked down at me. "And you are all ours, Mabel."

That didn't sound as scary as I'd thought, but it was to be naked in front of them like that in the daylight while they just stared at me. I went to cover myself, but they moved down with me in a flash.

"No, let us see you, lovely," Ian whispered as he palmed my breast before kissing me.

"Let us taste you," Andre added as he lifted my leg. He kissed along the skin of my calf before moving up as his fingers touched me intimately. Then they pushed deep inside of me as he kissed every inch of both my thighs.

So this was what heaven felt like?

Ian kissed my breasts and nipples and then my lips before it seemed my entire upper body—even my arms. Andre did my lower body before licking me intimately. It was the craziest and most erotic thing I did not think possible.

And wanted to absolutely have happen again.

"Will you kneel for us, darling?" Andre asked after he gave me an orgasm. "I want you to be over me while you touch Ian so I can watch."

"I do not understand," I admitted, glancing between them.

They shared a look and Ian smiled at me. "Trust us? We will show you. If you do not like it, we can stop."

I realized there was something I needed to know. "Have you ever shared a woman before like this?"

"No," they said instantly, Andre continuing. "It's you, Mabel. It could only ever be you."

"I will do whatever you want then," I promised, shocked when they both moaned deeply. Was that something men liked to hear?

Apparently, Ian and Andre did because they both moved quickly and showed me exactly what they had been talking about. I was straddling Andre's head on my knees and Ian was partially undressed so I could touch his cock practically in Andre's face.

And I was not the only one turned on by it.

I orgasmed so fast that Ian seemed shocked by it. What was I supposed to say? This was now what I always wanted from them?

Actually… "Can I have a phrase for this too?"

Ian chuckled and leaned in so our lips were touching. "Mabel, lovely, you can have a phrase for everything you want. We will give you everything you want and a lot of things you did not know you should want." As if to prove his point, he was rougher with my breast and then moved his hand to my bottom to sort of hold me closer to Andre's face.

And yes, I did very much want that.

So did Andre from the noises he made.

I moved my hand faster and Ian finished when I did a third time. I collapsed against him, out of breath and wondering if my heart could take making love if this was how it felt already.

I was confused when I was lifted up, but then I realized Andre had taken off his jacket and shirt… Which he put over me. He simply smiled at me. "I did not want you to be embarrassed again. There's something I want and I want you to see."

I simply nodded. Yes, they could show me everything.

Please do.

He sat on the sofa and moved me curled up next to him. Then he undid his pants and looked at Ian. "I think you owe me a few hundred blow jobs for how you have acted all these years. Get to it and show Mabel. She's curious about them."

"One, that's sexy," Ian muttered, rubbing his neck, his pants already buttoned up again. "Two…" He glanced at me. "Are you really okay with this? I mean, having to—I do not want to upset you or bring up bad memories with…"

David and Angie. They'd been intimate in front of me. That was all I knew.

I didn't answer immediately, wanting to consider it. "I have never even thought of them when we have been intimate. Any of it. They were rough and… This is always loving and titillating." I glanced between them. "I worry I would be intruding."

Andre snorted. "No, it's so much more because you will be here. I want your sweet lips while he puts his mouth on me."

"I am coming back for the rest of that kiss before though," Ian warned. Andre gave a half shrug and suddenly Ian was half straddling Andre's lap and they were kissing.

And I was sitting right there.

I watched as they kissed, enamored to watch it from this perspective. They were both almost aggressive in the way they worked their lips and their jaws moved. Ian's fingers dug into Andre's shoulder and I wondered if it hurt. I was pretty sure it would if he gripped me that tightly.

Then again, I wasn't a man.

"Do not be rough with me like you used to be and scare her," Ian warned.

Andre rolled his eyes. "I did that because you liked it, you dolt."

What did that mean? Was he like… No, I wasn't going to think about David and Angie. Even if Ian had brought them up. There was no place for them in even my thoughts now.

And she was dead.

Ian kissed the head of Andre's cock and then along it. I wondered how it felt to have that skin under my lips. It had felt so different when I touched it. Ian's violet eyes locked with mine and he smirked as if knowing where my mind was.

Did he want to see me do what he was? I enjoyed watching him please Andre. It made sense he would enjoy seeing the same… Right?

Either way, I had my first lesson in giving oral sex to a man that day and what Andre liked. It was extraordinary and honestly full of tenderness and love. I didn't care what others said about it.

And clearly, nobles did do it as I witnessed the damn prince of our kingdom do it.