Parker

PARKER

I walk my bicycle down the apartment hallway, then realize I’ve left something important inside my apartment. I guess I’m just excited to go for a little ride today.

I lower the sunglasses over my eyes, then head back into the kitchen area. It would help if I brought my keys and locked up, I think with a chuckle as I use the kickstand to balance the bike, then go to quickly retrieve them.

When I felt the breeze come into my cracked bedroom window this morning, I knew it would be the perfect day to go for a ride.

I love my ten-speed since it’s one of the first things I bought for myself after I got my own little space in the world, and I sometimes find it best to just clear my head by going on rides around Perkins Grove.

As soon as I’m finally ready for a little day out, I push open one of the building’s front doors, then head outside into the cool, crisp morning.

I bring up the kickstand and head outside.

Looping a leg over the side of the bike, I steady myself, tug at the bottom of my shorts so that I’m not flashing everyone, and put the pedal to the metal. I always like to spend the first half hour of my rides going slightly faster than necessary, because it helps to get the blood pumping.

Then I can spend the rest of my ride coasting and enjoying the day out.

I inhale a deep breath of dawn as I make my way toward the center of town. Perkins Grove is a beautiful place to visit, but living here can be mundane. I’ve thought of leaving from time to time, but I guess the hope of being stuck in the past, like this enclave tends to be, has kept me here.

I don’t know what I want from the past. Honsetly, I have thought of Brando from time to time, but not as often as I used to when I was a little girl or a teenage rebel. I guess knowing that we were split apart, and that he would more than likely never come back, forced the memory to start to fade.

Which is why the letter was so surprising.

How does he know my address? Did he talk to Mom and Dad? No, they would never tell him where I live. So, how?

I shake my head as I veer around the end of the block and continue pedaling toward downtown. I told myself that I wouldn’t think about him today, so I won’t.

A small smile curves up the corners of my lips as at how quiet this town is before everyone wakes up to start their days. It sometimes makes me wonder what city life is like, and if a girl like me would survive in a big, lively place. Maybe one day I’d make the move to find out, but I know I’d always come back home to Perkins Grove.

It’s where my heart used to be, and still is in a weird way.

You promised yourself.

A little internal scolding to remind myself that I should be focusing on now , and not then. Then was honestly full of heartache, and the only person that would ever understand and keep safe was?—

“Whoa!”

I gasp as I quickly turn the handlebars sharply to the left, into the mercifully empty street, and narrowly avoiding hitting some random jackasses that didn’t seem to look where they were going.

I cast a dirty look over my shoulder before turning my attention back to the road ahead. I’m not surprised that it’s a couple of random teenagers who are more than likely trying to sneak back home before their parents wake up and realize they’re way past whatever curfew has been set for them.

I stand up, steady myself, then slowly begin pedaling toward the old theater on the other side of the town. It brings back some good memories of when I won the starring role in a play that I had been working so hard for.

It was where I first had the dream of becoming a great actress one day.

It’s the place where I felt like the biggest fake in my life pretending that I was happy and full of life.

It was what they all expected.

My parents.

The other actors and actresses in our drama club.

So, I gave it to them.

But most of all, it’s the place where I let all of my hopes dreams go after I realized that I was never meant to be anything other than I am.

A left-behind girl in a small town wishing that there was something to live for.