26. Xander

When the dust over my relationship with Luke had adequately settled, I went back to the library. If it were up to me, I would have spent the rest of my eternal days brooding in my manor, but I received a letter from the library notifying me that I had a book overdue.

I had no such book in my possession, so it was clear to me that it was only a ploy to bring me back to the land of the living. Begrudgingly, I accepted the invitation and returned, hoping this time wouldn’t be as painful as the last.

The Librarian looked up when I entered the library on a particularly foggy evening, nodding sagely as I approached the counter.

“You’re looking for a new match, yes?” they asked, curls bouncing as they turned to make their way toward the back of the library where the secret entrance to the matchmaking room lay. “I heard that your previous match didn’t work out.”

“No, it did not.”

“I’m sorry to hear that. This is the matchmaking program’s first failure, but these things do happen. I shall read through your application again and see if I can find someone more suited to a vampiric lifestyle.”

They stopped in front of the peculiar bookshelf, fiddling with three books before the bookshelf slid aside, revealing the passage to the back room. They gestured for me to follow them inside, where they began searching for a specific paper amongst dozens of other papers stacked on a shelf.

“Ah, here it is! As I was saying, I shall read through this and select someone else for you based on your needs and preferences.”

“Thank you. And there’s nothing else I need to do?”

“No, I’ll contact you when I find another match. Until then, I suggest you enjoy singleness, as it won’t last much longer.”

The Librarian smiled and I tried to smile back, but it was difficult to muster any expression of joy. I’d spent many long years, longer than The Librarian had been alive, enjoying my singleness. There was nothing left to enjoy about being alone in life. I’d already sucked every last bit of intrigue out of that world.

Still, I left the library with a twinge of hope threatening to take hold in my chest. I wanted to believe that I could find true love, I really did. But if someone like Luke didn’t work out, the perfect man on paper, who else could possibly exist to be my mate?

I decided to look toward the future and forget about Luke, as difficult as that might be. The letter I awaited, the one promising me a new life with someone else, arrived a few days after I visited the library. It had a time and date written in the Librarian’s irritatingly sloppy handwriting. I had to squint to read the scrawls, but it appeared that I would meet my new match tomorrow at 10 pm in the back of the library. Some faes had no regard for certain worldly skills. They had ample time to practice handwriting, surely, choosing instead to spend it in nature – in the sunlight, of all places.

Nerves consumed me over the next day. I still wasn’t over Luke, not really, and every memory of him was as painful as a fresh cut – or, at least, as painful as I imagined a fresh cut to be.

He’d promised to come visit me one day, but he still had not been back to the manor and I suspected he wouldn’t return for some time longer, if at all. If I was just getting over our tumultuous relationship, he no doubt had some reservations about returning and opening some old wounds as well.

Still, when I found myself with nothing else to do at the worst hours when the sun was high in the sky, I lay in bed wondering what he was doing at that very moment. Was he home from work yet? Had he just crawled into bed and closed his eyes, brain filling with visions of us together?

I sipped wine, a poor replacement for blood but still vaguely enjoyable to my palate, and thought about what Luke might be eating for breakfast, lunch, or dinner. I couldn’t help but muse that perhaps he, too, was enjoying a glass of wine, its deep red hue reminding him of me.

I peeked underneath the sheet covering the bedroom vanity mirror. An empty room faced me, the lack of my body in the image serving as a chilling reminder of my immortality. Nevertheless, I ran a hand over my neck, skin smooth and ageless. Did Luke still have scars from all the times I bit him? Did he ever run his hands over them, or stare at them in the mirror?

These were questions I would never have answered, and at this point, I wasn’t sure I wanted them to be answered. It was time to move on. It was time to find the next man who could put up with my oddities and would love me for who I was.

I arrived at the library early, hoping my date would be punctual. I couldn’t stand a man who had no regard for others’ time.

After taking my place in one of the chairs placed at the small, round table, I nervously ran my fingers through my hair. This action disrupted the layer of gel holding each strand meticulously in place, sending a few rogue sections back over my forehead. I didn’t care. If my date didn’t like the looks of me with slicked-back hair, he wouldn’t like me with messy hair either.

The bell on the library door jingled as it opened. At this hour, it could be only one person: my date. I dared not look lest I be disappointed, so I waited, listening to each second tick by on the clock perched on the wall.

Tick.

Tick.

Tick.

“Xander?”

My throat closed, sealing my voice inside me. I couldn’t speak. I couldn’t look up to see if it was the handsome, mysterious man of my dreams greeting me or a vampire hunter in disguise.

“Hi, I’m Luke.”

I couldn’t have kept myself from looking up now if I wanted to, curiosity eating a hole straight through my brain. What were the odds that two separate men I dated one after the other were named Luke?

I allowed myself a quick glance in the man’s direction. A tousle of blonde hair caught my eye, deep blue eyes watching me back, waiting for my reaction.

“Hello, Luke.” I smiled. “It’s delightful to meet you. Please, sit down.”

Luke sat opposite me, his light blue sweater creasing as he leaned in, his fringe falling over his eyes. He needed a haircut, but I wasn’t about to be the one to tell him. I rather enjoyed watching him push his hair out of his face. He smiled nervously and rested his hands atop mine.

“I’ve never been more thrilled in my life to get a letter in the mail,” he said, “than when I got one from the library yesterday.”

I glanced back at The Librarian, who was watching out of the corner of their eye. When they saw me, they gave me a reassuring nod and turned their attention back to their work.

“I was hoping it would be you,” I told Luke. “I couldn’t bring myself to actually believe we would get a second chance, but I always held out hope.”

Luke grinned, his perfect, fangless teeth showing. “So did I,” he said. “I Believe me, Xander, so did I.”