10. Words Hurt

10 / WORDS HURT

Fitz

Monday came too fast and the sadness between us grew with every minute that passed. We spent all of Sunday in bed making love and watching movies and enjoying each other, the same for most of today as well.

I wanted them to come home with me.

The sun was starting to go down. I needed to start my journey back home soon, in theory, but all I could think about was bringing Sage with me.

Suddenly, I felt many things. I didn’t want to leave Sage here. I couldn’t just let go of everything that had happened this weekend. I was meant to be with them. They were meant to be my mate. I knew that entirely.

But was it too soon? Would I scare them away by confessing my feelings?

I’d gone through every scenario I could imagine through the day and night. It frightened me to be so honest, but I couldn’t deny the way my soul recognized theirs.

Sage was mine.

Sage was everything I'd dreamed of and more. I’d found someone who made me feel loved. Who made me feel like I would change my entire life just to be with them. There were so many things I wanted to experience with them, to see through their eyes. It was hard to imagine going back home without them.

Sage stirred next to me.

“Do you need to go?” I asked softly, even though the words pained me. “You originally planned to leave last night. Not that I want you to leave.”

“I work tomorrow,” they mumbled sleepily.

“Good.” I slipped my arm around their waist, but touching them only made my heart hammer faster with worry.

I was supposed to start my flight back tonight. I needed to pack, needed to clean the house, needed to prepare for my journey.

I couldn’t take this.

I sat up, looking down at Sage. They opened their eyes and turned to look up at me. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m in love with you,” I said.

“No you’re not,” they said immediately.

I was taken aback. “I am, Sage. I love you.”

They stared at me for a moment, something flickering in their gaze that I didn’t recognize. Worry? Fear? Had I just fucked everything up?

“You can’t love me,” they whispered. They sat up, their hair ruffled. “You just met me.”

That stung even more. “Sage, I…”

“This was just a weekend thing,” they insisted. “We both knew that.”

“Is that all it was to you?”

I couldn’t hide the pain in my voice. This very much wasn’t just a ‘weekend thing’ to me. Sage had changed my life.

I reached for them, but they were already getting out of bed. My throat felt like it was closing in as they started to get dressed.

“Sage…”

“You don’t love me,” they said. “You’re too perfect. You live in England. How would we make this work?”

“We could make it work,” I said quickly. “Long distance relationships?—”

“It’s just too much, Fitz. You need someone that is different from me.”

“What do you mean?” I asked. “You are perfect for me. You are perfect and kind and?—”

“All of that’s just what you think now.” They spun around, their eyes glistening with tears. “Eventually everyone realizes that I’m not worth their time and you will too.”

I was horrified. “You’re wrong,” I argued. “You’re absolutely wrong. You are worthy, Sage. I don’t know who made you believe otherwise, but you deserve to be happy and loved and?—”

“Don’t use your Dom voice with me.”

That hurt almost as much as their rejection. “I am not manipulating you,” I growled. “I’m not using my Dom voice. I am telling you the truth. I know this has gone fast, but I know you are meant to be my mate.”

“ Mate ?” Sage questioned. “I don’t think so. I was just curious about going on a date with a monster.”

My heart sank further.

“It was fun. But beyond that I don’t think we can do this.”

“Why?” I whispered.

“Because you’re a monster and I’m a human. You live there, I live here. It’s too complicated.”

I studied them as they started to throw their items in their bag. Their shoulders were tense, their voice wavering with their words.

“Sage, we can make this work,” I said. “I want you. I love you. I want us to find our happy ending.”

“This isn’t a fairy tale,” they snapped. “It’s time for us to wake up. We’re just not meant to be.”

They zipped up their bag and slipped on their shoes. I stood up, fighting the tears. “Are you leaving now?”

“I think it’s best that I do.”

“I can fly you home,” I whispered.

“No.” They picked up their phone and clicked a few buttons. “I’ll get a ride.”

“Sage, please don’t walk out like this,” I begged. “I’m sorry I scared you. I’m sorry I rushed things but I think we have something special here that’s worth the trouble of making it work.”

They looked up at me, their eyes glistening. “I don’t.”

“I understand if you’re frightened.”

I took a step closer to them, but they held up their hands.

“Stop, Fitz. We’re done. Go home, enjoy your life. You’re better off without me in it.”

My words failed me. My heart felt like it was being ripped from my chest. This was wrong, they were meant to be mine. But, I couldn’t force them to want this or to love me.

So all I did was nod as they took their bag and left the bedroom.

“Sage,” I whispered.

But they couldn’t hear me.

The front door opened and shut, leaving me alone.

Sage was gone.

I’d ruined everything.

I couldn’t move. I stood there, holding back the tears but the pain was too much. The feeling of ruining it all was too much. I sat down on the edge of the bed, replaying this weekend through my mind.

How could I have missed the signs that this didn’t mean to them what it meant to me? We’d mentioned the future a few times, hadn’t we?

This was a terrible terrible mistake. I’d done something wrong, maybe. Or maybe Sage was right and we weren’t meant to be together.

They’re mine. My mate.

I felt it so strongly, and it only made everything hurt more.

The only thing I could do now was respect what they’d said and leave for good.