Chapter 6

Chapter

Six

A fter checking in with my sisters and having lunch with them, I dealt with a few more matters of state, including getting this stupid cast off my arm, and then set out for Sky Reach. It was a three-hour flight through beautiful countryside, but my mind chewed on things the entire time. Did I make the right choices today? Firing Lucinda, assigning Tetra, Kohen, and all of our Wilds alliance to Sky Reach? Even Alek. I wanted to be with all my friends, but that felt selfish. Elaine double-checked with each one of them, and they all said they wanted to go to Sky Reach. We gave them the option to back out. No one did. Which made me respect them all more.

‘Incoming,’ Liana said, and I tensed, clenching my thighs onto her saddle and preparing to fight. ‘Never mind, it’s Onyx and Kohen,’ she said, relieved.

I relaxed, peering behind me, and saw nothing. I looked to the left and right, but all I saw were clouds.

“Up here!” Kohen called.

I peered up at the giant black dragon belly and smiled at Kohen, peeking over Onyx’s side.

“I’m coming down!” he shouted down to me.

“What? No!” I screamed, but he had already slid one leg over and was dangling from the harness strap on Onyx.

“Are you insane! You could die!” I yelled as my heart leaped into my throat.

He dropped onto Liana’s back right behind me and held on to my waist to steady himself.

“No, I’ve seen the future beyond this day, and I’m very much alive,” he breathed against my ear.

My stomach warmed at the close contact, and I couldn’t help but lean back into him. I turned my head to look him in the eyes.

“We can’t do this. I’m sorry,” I told him.

Our faces were inches from each other.

He nodded, leaning forward and taking my bottom lip into his mouth. I moaned, unable to tell him no because every fiber of my being was screaming “ Yes ,” including my heart. It was like today at the funeral we were strangers, but when we got alone, he was a different person. I kind of loved it.

“Kohen,” I breathed as his palms flattened against my belly, tucking me even closer to him.

“Yes, my Empress?”

Those words held so much emotion. Loyalty, adoration, humility.

“If we get caught, they’ll kill you, and I don’t know what they will do to me,” I told him.

“We won’t get caught then.” He said, and warmth bloomed in my gut as he peppered my neck with kisses.

I peered up into his eyes, trying to ferret out anything there that might show me that he wasn’t serious. But all I saw were layers of pain mixed with passion. I tried to remind myself that he’d just buried his best friend today, and I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that I loved his touch.

“If you’re just looking to have sex, look elsewhere,” I said boldly, my wound from Jace reopening at that moment.

He frowned, removing his hands from my belly. “Aisling, I’m in love with you. I would never?—”

I gasped at the words, at how easily he said them. Again . “You don’t love me,” I told him incredulously. “You love some future version of me you’ve seen in your visions.” I needed to fight this to get him to stop saying it.

He seemed to think about that for a minute. “Maybe. But I also love this version. The one that tries to push me away, the one who is so loyal to her best friend she partnered with her father’s sworn enemy to keep her alive in the Wilds. The one who loves her sisters and almost slit my throat when she thought I had snuck into her house and harmed them. I love this version of you, too, Aisling, and all the others I’ve seen in the future.”

His declaration tore my heart wide open. I’d loved Jace. I’d loved him with my whole heart, and he’d betrayed me. He cut me so deeply I was scared to ever love someone like that again. It was safer not to. I had to look out for myself now. But it was hard to deny Kohen. He was everything I never knew I needed.

Kohen’s fingers stroked my neck. “I know you’ve been hurt.” He grasped the bottom of my chin and pulled my lips to hover near his. “I only want what you’re willing to give. And if you take it away at any moment, that’s okay, too. I want you on your terms, Aisling.”

It was the sexiest thing a man had ever said to me. Wanting me on my terms. Giving me permission to give whatever I had and also to take it away if I felt done. It was what I needed.

I whimpered, nodding, and pressed my lips to his, knowing that in my secret place, deep inside of myself that I shared with no one, I loved him too. But I’d never tell him. It would be cleaner that way when I cut things off to marry whoever Elaine and my advisors thought I should.

‘We’re getting close.’ Liana broke my trance, and I pulled away from Kohen, panting.

Onyx hovered below us this time, and Kohen met my fiery gaze with one of his own, a half-cocked grin on his face. “I’m starting to see my gift as a blessing. I get to have you in my visions and then again in real life when the vision finally plays out.” He planted one more soft, warm kiss on my lips. “Lucky me, to be able to have you twice.”

My heart squeezed at that. Did that mean he’d had a vision about this right here? Before I could ask, he dropped down onto Onyx’s back and flew ahead to Sky Reach.

I was equally excited and scared at the prospect of a secret relationship with him.

Liana cut into my thoughts: ‘Be careful there, Aisling. You’re empress now, and a lot of people will have an opinion on who you want to be with.’

‘Oh yeah, and how do you know that?’ I asked her playfully. She wasn’t wrong, but what did a creature of the Wilds know of such things?

She was quiet for a moment, and I sensed that I’d struck a chord with her.

‘Remember I told you of my grandmother? That you two share the same gift?’

I tried not to think of that gift. Or curse. However you wanted to put it. The ability to control another’s will felt too dangerous a power to have. Which is why if anyone ever found out, I’d be quickly and quietly killed.

I did remember when Liana told me about her grandmother. Thinking about her life from a time way back before she found herself here was too wild for my brain to ruminate on since it was thousands of years ago.

She was ancient.

‘My grandmother was the empress of our people, and her council tried to control who she mated with. It didn’t end well for any of them.’

My stomach dropped at that admission. ‘Your grandmother, the one with the thrall, was an empress?’

‘We call our leader Tsarina, but yes. She was… maybe still is. I don’t know.’

I frowned at that. ‘That would make you… like a princess, or heir, or something?’

I could sense her smile beneath me. ‘It would. We are similar in that. Except you are empress now and no longer an heir.’

This revelation was mind-blowing. The entire time I’d been with Liana, she never told me she was the empress’ daughter, just like me! Sky Reach came into view, and I almost wanted to tell Liana to turn back for a bit and fly circles above the forest. I wanted to know more about her life. She never spoke of the past. I assumed it was too painful, so I never asked.

‘If firebirds live forever, that means your grandmother could still be the leader, right? Or maybe it’s your mother now, the Tsarina.’ I tried the word out; the “t” was silent.

She was quiet so long I thought I had offended her and she wasn’t going to answer me.

‘My mother died during the Great Fall. Best not to think of these things now. They were a very, very long time ago. As you get older, you will learn not to dwell on the past, Aisling. Living forever is painful that way.’

I wanted to know what the Great Fall was and more about her mother, like how could she die if female firebirds were immortal? But I knew then that it was too painful, so I said nothing more. Sometimes, when I probed my bond with Liana to sense where she was or how she was feeling, if I went a little too deeply, there was a dark cavern of sorrow there. She was hiding something from me, something horrific that she didn’t want to remember or think back on. I respected that, and I didn’t push.

We landed in the middle of the base next to Onyx just as Admiral Caruso grabbed Kohen by the upper arm and hauled him away, her creature trotting alongside them. The admiral’s face wore signs of recently being mauled by a bear or something. Her left eye was swollen shut, her lip was split, and her cheeks were a sickly shade of greenish purple, marred with bruises.

My heart stopped in my chest, and my gaze flew to Elaine. Vespa stood tall beside her, the electric pink ember marks on her russet fur pulsing. A light rain began to fall as I slid off of Liana and walked briskly over to Elaine, my gaze tracking Kohen and the admiral as they stepped into a nondescript building at the back of the campus.

“What the hell is going on?” I asked, eyeing the place Kohen had just been dragged to in a manner that suggested he was in trouble.

Elaine peered at me like I was simpleminded. “You think I trust him around you and on this mission without clearing him of any wrongdoing with your father’s death first?”

My heart restarted but thumped faster than ever before. If I was being honest, a very small part of me thought Kohen could have killed my father. He had motive, and he was there that night.

“He wouldn’t do that,” I said lamely because I wanted it to be true, especially after kissing just now. I wanted more kisses.

Elaine pinned me with a pointed look. “You don’t know that, Aisling.” There was suspicion in her gaze as if she were wondering why I would stick up for the Imbrian.

I glanced down at Elaine’s knuckles to see they were purple and swollen.

“Did you do that to Caruso’s face?” I asked, putting two and two together.

Pain crossed Elaine’s features momentarily. “She’s been cleared of any suspicion surrounding your father’s death,” was all she said. I knew then how hard that must have been for her, but it was good to know I was in the company of those I could trust.

She then inclined her head to the main war room building. “You have a lot of people waiting for you,” she said and walked towards the building. I followed her with dread in my stomach.

Night had fallen. It was time to pay back Luska for what they did to Riverine. But my mind was scattered now. What if Kohen did kill my father? What if this entire time, he’d wormed his way into my life just to get close to my father and take him down—and I was next? What if he wanted to take over all of Amersea and Imbria and rule both as king?

‘If Kohen wanted you dead, you’d be dead by now. He’s had many chances,’ Liana said, and I took in a deep, cleansing breath. She was right. I hated myself for how quickly I mistrusted people now. Food tasters and round-the-clock security were making me paranoid.

My gaze flicked to the blue steel door Caruso had pulled Kohen into. I prayed to every star in the sky that he be cleared of any involvement. I couldn’t handle that kind of betrayal—especially after Jace. I’d never trust a man again.

I stepped into the war room, and everyone saluted me. I strode over to the table, and we dove right into the plan. I was listening, but I was also eyeing the war room door. Why wasn’t Kohen back yet with the admiral? How long did it take to ask one question? Were you in any way involved in the death of the emperor? Unless he was… and she was arresting him right now…

“My men spent all night building the payload,” Commander Ledger said, pulling me back to reality. “It’s big enough to take out the Red Palace but not too big that it will hurt any surrounding civilian buildings.”

I nodded. “That’s good.” The War Code was important to me. Without them, we were monsters. Innocent casualties sometimes happened, but we did our best to avoid them at all costs. Although the Luskin people would probably slit my throat given the chance, I didn’t blame them for the actions of their leader.

Some newcomers joined the meeting, and I was introduced to the other soldiers who would be riding with us on the mission. Lieutenant Colt, a tall and handsome twenty-five-year-old, would be going with me. The two that would be with Kohen were Sergeant Finn and Captain Jade. The female, Jade, who had long red hair, was bound to a wolf. Finn, a stocky, short-haired guy in his twenties, was bonded to a tiger. They were all a part of the elite squadron known as the Shadow Blades, named as such because they were rarely seen or heard until their blade was at your throat. These two men and one woman were the best assassins we had, and would be accompanying us in the off chance we made landfall, and I needed extraction. We were hoping to keep this all in the air, though, especially since only Colt had a creature of the air, a hawk. The other creatures obviously wouldn’t be going with us on the mission.

Liana would fly us over the building, we would drop the payload, and fly home. That was the plan.

Five more minutes went by, and my palms started to sweat. Where was Kohen? He wouldn’t kill my father… would he?

Of course he would! My father killed his dad—granted, that was in retaliation for the train attack, but Kohen had motive for such a thing. My heart started to beat so quickly that I felt a little dizzy. He said he loved me. I kissed him. Did I kiss my father’s murderer? Nausea rolled through my gut. My gaze flicked to Elaine, who was watching the door as much as I was. What was taking them so long?

Elaine must have read my mind because she moved from the corner of the room to the door, probably to go check on him, just as it opened.

I nearly sagged against the wall when Kohen and Caruso stepped inside, chatting easily. She laughed at something he said, and I exhaled all the breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding.

Holy crap . I couldn’t believe I had actually thought Kohen would kiss me one second and murder my father the next.

I gave a small laugh, and everyone looked at me, so I turned it into a throat-clearing.

“Shall we recap for Specialist Badshah so he is brought up to speed?” I asked. I was sure to use his newly minted rank, which hopefully sent a message to everyone in the room. He’d graduated, the same as I had. He was one of us. We were no longer cadets.

The high-ranking military officials in the room watched Kohen walk to the center of the table like they were watching a poisonous snake. Their eyes never left him as if they expected him to attack them all at any moment. I observed him with a different eye. My gaze ran the length of his tight t-shirt as I dreamed about touching what was under it. Knowing that Caruso had cleared him of any involvement with my father’s death made something click inside of me.

I trusted him, and I could count on two hands how many people in this world I trusted.

Trust was sexy, I had decided.

Kohen flicked me a little glance and came to join us at the war table. He stood next to me and moved his leg in such a way that it lay against mine as he leaned over the table to peer at the map and hear the game plan. We were all crammed in this room, over fifteen of us, so no one looking might think anything of it, but I felt the intention behind his touch. His deliberate way of touching me made me also harken to the words he’d uttered to me.

I love you.

What a crazy fool.

Love? It was for puppies. My father was right. Loving Jace got me nowhere. I loved my family. I loved Elaine and Tetra. But loving Kohen wasn’t going to happen. I couldn’t let it, or if it had already happened, I couldn’t acknowledge it. I wasn’t sure I’d survive it when he was ripped away from me, and I was forced to marry someone else to appease the people. No, love wasn’t on the menu.

“Ready, Empress?” someone asked, and I jerked my head in that direction, slowly pulling my leg away from Kohen’s, and nodded. “Let’s do this.”

Tonight was about revenge for my father. I needed to focus on that and not the burning desire Kohen had lit inside of me. Because I felt like I could burn the whole world down with this heat currently resting over me.

Kohen met my gaze, and I quickly looked away. I didn’t trust myself not to moan right here in front of everyone just by him looking at me.

“Let’s show Luska what happens when they mess with our capital,” I told the room.

The men and women present broke into roars of agreement, and we stepped outside and readied for our mission.

I was confident all would go well, with little issue, since Kohen said that he saw us hit our target in his vision.

Boy, was I wrong.