Chapter 20

Chapter

Twenty

Fiona

T he light flickered behind my eyelids, and I snuggled deeper beneath the blanket. It got cold at the cabin, which was why I liked to sleep around the fire in the living room with my younger brother. We would set up our sleeping bags so our heads would face each other and then we would stay up whispering long after our parents scolded us for not going to sleep.

My brother would always drift off first, even though he insisted each time that he wouldn’t. I didn’t care. I just cared that Jack was with me, and sometimes I’d keep whispering to him long after his breaths had become snores. I slipped one hand from the warmth of my cocoon to touch his head, but my hand only touched something hard and cold. I felt around without opening my eyes, sure I’d feel his mass of curls, but there was nothing. He wasn’t there.

I jerked up quickly, my heart racing as I gasped, the truth rushing back to me in a punch to the gut that knocked the breath from me. Of course, he wasn’t there. He hadn’t been there for over a decade.

I clamped a hand over my mouth to keep from crying out as my gaze swept the room. I wasn’t in the cabin. I was in Vyk’s quarters at the Drexian Academy. The last time I’d seen him, the commander had been by the fire, but now he was nowhere to be seen. I dropped my hand as the heart rate slowed, grateful that he wasn’t there to see my confusion and grief.

I raked a hand through my hair as I swung my feet from the bed and to the floor. The cool stone was bracing even through my socks, but I welcomed the shock. Anything to bring me back to the present. Dwelling in the past, as lovely as it seemed at the time, only meant pain when I returned to reality and realized that Jack would never be there again.

Now that I had shrugged off my dream, I took a deep breath and straightened. Where was Vyk? I must have been asleep for a while. I never dreamed about my brother until I was in a deep sleep, and it rarely happened anymore. Only when I was exhausted and stressed—or both. Having to come to Vyk’s quarters and discovering that my former colleague—and one-night-stand—was en route to the academy had been a one-two punch that had brought my childhood memories out in full force.

Whatever happiness I experienced by remembering Jack was fleeting and almost instantly obliterated by the crushing weight of sadness that now tinged all my childhood memories. Even the most joyful recollections were painful because they were a reminder that he’d been snatched from us too young. It was why when I’d left home, I’d gone far away and rarely ever returned. It was easier to forget if I didn’t have to see the place where we’d grown up and walk by the room my mother had preserved, his racecar comforter pristine and his trophies faithfully dusted.

“Time to get the hell out of here,” I muttered to myself, as I shoved my feet into my boots. It didn’t matter where Vyk was. I’d done what I’d promised. I’d stayed in his quarters for the night. Now it was time to hope no one spotted me as I slipped out and slunk back to the female tower.

I stomped my feet to jam my feet deeper into my boots as I made my way to the door, looking down the whole way. I was so focused on my feet that I didn’t notice the door slide open until I’d walked into a wall. But it wasn’t a wall of rock, like most of the academy, it was a wall of muscle.

Looking up, I stepped back, trod on my boot’s laces and started to fall.

Vyk reached out and grabbed me by the arms before I hit the floor. He righted me before he let go, then he eyed me. “You were leaving?”

It was impossible to ignore the fact that the commander wasn’t wearing a shirt as he stood in the open doorway, blocking me from escape. His chest looked as solid and muscular as it had when I’d walked into it. There was a black cord necklace hanging from his neck that had always been obscured by his uniform and a swirling tattoo covering one side of his chest that looked like flames chasing more flames.

“Fiona? ”

Him saying my name snapped me to attention, and I tore my gaze from his bare skin. I squared my shoulders. “Yes, I’m leaving. It’s morning.”

“It’s the middle of the night.”

I opened my mouth to argue with him but then I stole a glance at the window in his quarters and the moonless, inky sky. Why hadn’t I noticed that before?

Because you were too distracted by your memories of Jack.

I shook this off and folded my arms over my chest. “I woke up, you were gone, so I thought I might as well leave.” Then I noticed the sweat rolling down his neck to the hollow of his throat and a strange sensation pulsed through me. “Where were you getting so sweaty in the middle of the night?”

He met my gaze, his mouth curving slightly. “Would you rather I stayed here and got sweaty?”

I opened my mouth in outrage, then closed it, then opened it again. “No, of course not.”

He stepped closer so I had to tip my head back to keep eye contact. “You are sure?”

There was no way in hell I was going to admit that he looked good enough to devour or that sweaty guys were a turn-on for me. Just like I was never going to tell him that the thought of him getting sweaty with someone else made me want to go on a rampage. I could despise the guy and still find him hot. I could know that he was off-limits to me while also hating the thought of any other woman touching him.

I put a hand on his bare chest and pushed hard enough that I could sidle past him. “I’m absolutely sure. ”

“I was on the climbing wall,” he said, as I stepped into the corridor.

I hesitated and pivoted to face him, relief making my shoulders uncoil. I glanced at his back and the raised bumps running along his spine, fighting the urge to reach out and touch one. Don’t even think about it, I told myself before tearing my gaze away. I couldn’t think of anything sensible to say, and he still looked slightly amused by me, which was annoying as fuck.

“Next time, I will stay in the room, so you do not get jealous.”

“I was not…” I spluttered, but he was already turning and unfastening his pants as he headed toward his bathroom, giving me a full view of his muscular back and the long column of nodes that ran the length of it. I didn’t wait for him to drop his pants before I spun away and stormed off down the hall. “Infuriating, arrogant Drexian.”

I rubbed my fingers together where they’d touched his slick chest, my skin betraying me by tingling. It wasn’t lost on me that he’d said “next time,” and it wasn’t lost on me that I didn’t mind.