Chapter 25

Grace

I'm going to be a single mom.

I sit at the kitchen table, stirring my coffee more from habit than need. I poured the creamer in about an hour ago, and I still haven't taken a sip. My eyes are swollen from crying, and every limb feels heavy and clunky. I barely slept at all last night, managing only a few exhausted hours after I'd cried all the tears left inside me.

I should have known better. I had known better, but I let myself get swept away on a fool's hope again, like an idiot. Oli isn't going to change, isn't going to suddenly become the family man I've always yearned for. He told me exactly who he was, and I chose not to believe him, didn't I? I let my hopes, and my fantasies get the better of me again, let my dumb little heart convince me once more that this time, this time it would be different.

But I saw his face when I'd told him I was pregnant. He'd looked terrified. He'd literally shaken his head and backed away from me, probably coming back to his senses and reevaluating the idea of being in a committed relationship now that it was real.

In the end, Sera's appearance was probably a blessing. The final nail in my coffin, the last reminder of reality, to get my head out of my ass and back here on planet earth.

I can't even blame Oli, not really. I'm the idiot here. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me three times? Different man, same story repeated. And me, the biggest fool of them all.

I shouldn't have let myself hope. I should have been realistic, and then maybe it wouldn't hurt so much. Maybe I'd be able to handle having Oli pull back and offer bare-minimum support to his child as required by law.

But I had to go and have hope. I let myself trust his words, his promises, and that crushed me all the more. I know

that nice words are just that—words. Empty air that sounds good, but means nothing more. Hadn't Brad at least taught me that much?

Jesus fucking Christ, I'm a mess.

"Mamma?"

I take a deep breath and wipe at my cheeks, before Lucas enters the kitchen holding his stuffed dinosaur tightly.

"Yes, baby?"

"Can I have a snack, please?"

"Sure." I rummage around in the cupboards for some cheese and crackers, and when I hand them to him in his plastic dinosaur bowl, he stares up at me with shimmering eyes and a wobbly lip.

"I'm sad today."

I feel my expression crumple, and I drop to my knees before him. "Oh, baby, what's wrong?"

He shrugs his little shoulders. "I don't know. You look so sad, and it makes me feel sad, too."

"I'm not—" I sigh and pull him into a hug. There's no point in lying. "Sometimes, even adults are sad. It's okay, I'll feel better soon."

"Maybe we can go to the park?" he suggests as he pulls back. "The park always makes me happy. It can make you be happy, too."

My heart warms. He's such a good boy. "Alright, we can go to the park. But maybe in a little while? Mommy's not ready right now."

"Okay." He nods and hands me one of his crackers, before heading back to the room downstairs full of his toys.

A knock at the door startles me, and I try to school my face to look normal as I head over. Ella mentioned she might pop by today, and…

My heart skips a beat when I swing the door open to see Oli standing before me. He looks just as wrecked as I feel, as if he didn't get any sleep last night either.

He tries for a small smile, and it looks both hopeful and hopeless at the same time. "Can we talk?"

I want to slam the door in his face to protect myself from more hurt. Seeing him makes me want to cry again, I'm not ready to talk to him, not at all. "About what?"

His shoulders slump. "Grace…"

"Look, I'm busy right now."

"Please." His expression is sincere, his voice soft and cracking, but aren't they always sincere just before they weave their next lie? "Grace, I… Last night, I—I'm sorry. The last thing I want is to hurt you. I didn't mean for… I don't want you to think…"

In the end, it's his fumbled words that get to me. He's always so put together, always knows what to say, and seeing him shattering around the edges cracks what little resolve I have left.

I pull back and start shutting the door so that he won't see the way my tears are resurfacing. "Meet me at Heartwood Grove in an hour."

The door shuts on him before he can reply, and before I can change my mind.

***

The little forest in the middle of town has always been a serene and beautiful place. While the enormous, ancient pines dominating the center of the grove are evergreen, there are still other trees dotted about, especially around the edges. They sway in the breeze now as Lucas and I slowly approach, releasing red and gold and brown leaves to dance in the air around us.

The seasons are changing, but my life remains the same pathetic mess it's always been,

I spot Oli's tall, solid frame long before we approach him. In dark denim and a sleek bomber jacket, his side profile is framed by the leaves as he stands with his back against a tree, horns curved and proud as he waits for us.

God, he didn't even need me to tell him where to go. He just paid attention, learned which path I normally take into the grove, and headed there without needing to be mothered and cajoled. Why does he have to be so good in every way but the one that counts?

"Horsey! Hey Mamma, look, Oli's here! Can I go say hi?"

I nod and release my hold on Lucas's hand, letting him zoom down the path towards Oli, who crouches to receive him with a smile.

By the time I approach, Lucas is grinning ear to ear and bouncing on his toe. Oli stands, rubbing awkwardly at one of his horns as he looks at me. "Hi."

"Lucas, remember how you wanted to go exploring in the trees on your own?" I bend down so that we're eye to eye. "Now's your chance, but remember to—"

"Stay where you can see me!" he squeaks with a giggle. "I know, I know, can I go now?"

"Yes, off you go."

"Woo!"

He rushes off excitedly, leaving Oli and I behind in utter silence. I find myself unable to look at his handsome face, so I turn and begin a slow walk into the shelter of the canopy. Oli follows quietly.

"Lucas, baby, we're walking," I call, watching as he darts from tree to tree, bending to pick something up by each trunk. "Keep your eyes on us and keep up."

"'Kay!"

I should say something. I should start the conversation, break the silence, but I just tug at the sleeves of my pullover and keep my eyes on my son. My heart pounds with every step, the unspoken words between us heavy. I try to steel myself to hear him take back his promise of commitment last night.

He looks over at me, and I keep looking steadfastly ahead.

"I'm sorry," he says after a long moment, voice quiet. My feet stop moving beneath me.

Finally, I turn to look at him. "What are you sorry for."

He pauses as well, turning to face me with his full body. His eyes dart once to look at Lucas behind me, and when they land back on mine they're full of emotions I can't even begin to interpret. "To start, I'm sorry about Sera. That I didn't think to take my spare keycard back from her and allowed that situation to even happen—that's on me. I wish you didn't have to witness that."

My heart drops, and I turn away. "Sure, it'll never happen again, blah blah blah. "

"Grace." He touches my forearm, and I look back. "I don't… I don't like that you saw me

like that. The way Sera was—it was still a reflection of me. Of the male I was, the male I don't want to be. He's shallow, hollow, and constantly running. I don't want to run anymore."

I stare at him, at the way his brows are creased and his eyes are darting all over my face as if desperately mapping every detail.

"I'm sorry about Sera, because I'm sorry that part of myself ever had to touch you at all. You're so much better than that."

My chest pangs, and the defensive stiffness in my shoulders loosens. I let out a breath and begin walking again. "Oli, I've never held your past against you. I'm not judging you."

He keeps pace beside me. "You have every right to."

"I'm not judging you . " I level him with a glare, and he shoves his hands into his jacket pockets and smiles fleetingly.

We walk on in silence again. Lucas continues to dart around nearby, keeping close, until eventually Oli speaks with a quiet voice.

"I'm sorry that I made you feel as if I didn't want…this. Our… Our ch—" he huffs and falls silent, before grabbing my hand and stopping us again.

He takes a deep breath. "I don't know how to be a father."

My heart plummets, sinking straight through my stomach and to the floor, but I purse my lips and force myself to hear him out.

"I don't know what it's like. I've never had one—not a good one, anyway. My father, he—" Oli shoves both his hands into his bomber jacket again, and now his eyes are flying everywhere—to the sky, to the floor, to the trees. He looks flighty, somehow. Uncomfortable. His ears make little twitching flicks against his horns, and his shoulders hunch. "My father had a Mating Mark on his wrist, the sign of Fated Mates for minotaurs. But my mother died giving birth to me, and I don't think he ever forgave me for it." Oli's eyes are no longer meeting mine, and now my heart is twisting for a different reason. "He raised me, because that's what she would have wanted. But he was… absent. He supported me financially, he existed and allowed me to exist by his side. But he… He wasn't… All I've ever known is loneliness."

His lips curl into a smile completely devoid of warmth, and he seems to force himself to look back at me. "His heart died with his mate, and he had nothing left to give to me, or any female he brought into his life for the convenience of helping to raise me. He disappeared when I was eighteen. I don't know if he's still alive, or not."

A chill runs through me, and it's from more than just the cold breeze that picks up around us.

"I'm so sorry," I say, feeling a lump forming in my throat.

"I know I hurt you last night with my reaction," he continues softly. "I don't know what being a father looks like. I was… scared. Terrified, actually, as pathetic as that is."

"Oli, don't… "

"I'm a fifty-year-old male, and I'm scared. Of you. Of the miracle you're growing inside you. Last night, I p—I panicked." He draws in a breath, and it sounds desperate. "I'm sorry, I didn't—didn't want to react like that, I—I just—"

"Oli," My throat feels tight, and my words come out thick as I dart towards him, laying both my hands on his chest. Tears sting the back of my eyes and my heart hurts for him, as I watch him try so hard to hold himself together. "It's okay, baby, I've got you. Come here."

I hug him tightly, and he sinks down into my embrace. His arms wrap tight around my back, his nose presses into my hair, and he takes several slow, deep breaths.

"I lo—I love you, Grace," he whispers, and I squeeze my eyes shut as tears form behind my lids. "I don't know how to be a father, but I want to try. I want to try with you."

A whirlwind of emotions crash through me—relief, joy, shock, and a burst of hot, almost violent love rushes through me, as if every feeling I've been making myself hold back has finally smashed through my walls and is pouring into me uncontrollably. The weight I've been carrying, the fear of being hurt again, and that desperate voice at the back of my head always telling me to be careful, to hold back—it all disappears.

When I pull back to look at him, the sincerity in his eyes is unmistakable. It's real, tinged with fear and self-doubt, and all the more beautiful for it.

Suddenly, a little body barrels into our legs and I startle, before laughing tearily and looking down into Lucas's delighted, confused face.

"Why're we hugging? I wanna hug, too!"

I'm about to pick him up but Oli beats me to it, bending down to scoop him against his chest. "You wanna help me with something, little lamb?"

When Lucas nods enthusiastically, Oli bends again, dropping into the dirt on one knee. He sits Lucas on his bent thigh, and smiles. "Can you reach into my pocket, and take out what you find there?"

Lucas does so, pulling out a small, dark navy box. My heart stutters, and I dart my eyes between the box and Oli's face.

"What…"

"Open it," Oli tells my son, "and hold it up for your mom to see."

"'Kay!"

"Oli, what…" My heart is ratcheting in my chest, tugging against its prison like it's trying to escape, as Lucas opens the little box to show me a beautiful, vintage wedding ring with one large stone in the middle, surrounded by smaller stones to look almost like a flower. "Oli…"

"It was my mother's wedding ring," Oli murmurs, staring up at me with hope and trepidation all rolled into one. "The only thing of real value my father ever gave me. I want you to have it. Marry me, Grace."

My heart leaps into my throat, and I can't breathe. This can't be real, it can't be happening. Just a minute ago I thought he was going to tell me that he couldn't be in our baby's life, and now he's on one knee? He can't know he wants me like that, it's too soon, it's too…

Oli cocks his head, and a little of his old, charming smile bleeds through, even as his eyes still shine with uncertainty. "Please?"

"Come on, Mamma, he said please!"

I drop to my knees, too, and now we're all crouched in the dirt like idiots. Lucas laughs and hooks his arms around my neck. "Mom, you're so silly!"

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you," Oli murmurs, "with Lucas, and with whoever is growing in here." He rests his palm over my stomach, and his warm brown eyes stare into mine, even as Lucas laughs again and cries out.

"Ew, there isn't a person

in Mamma's tummy,

horsey!"

"Will you say yes?" Oli asks, and there's so much hope in his eyes that it breaks me.

I nod, because I'm trying too hard not to cry like a baby to be able to form words, and he blows out a long, relieved breath.

"Good. Because I had Ismelda come here with all the papers. She's an officiant, so she can marry us right now." He frowns and suddenly looks around, before shrugging and nodding to the side. "I suppose that guy could be the witness. Or else we could call Rho or your sister."

"What guy? What?" I fall back on my ass, looking over at a centaur strolling casually through the park, minding his own business, and I squeak again. "What?"

He grins, shifts Lucas from his leg, and winces as he stands. Then he offers me his hand, but I just sit here, staring up at him dumbfounded.

"We can have a proper ceremony later."

"Have you lost your mind, Oli?"

His grin slowly broadens, and he stretches his hand further towards me. "I did tell you I was one for dramatic gestures."

I relent and put my hand in his, but as our palms connect and he pulls me up, I feel a zap of static electricity in my wrist and I wince and pull it to my chest, rubbing it with my thumb.

Immediately, Oli's eyes dart down to my hand, and he takes it back in his and spins it, palm up, pushing my sleeve back to expose my bare arm.

I look down. "What?" My wrist is just it's same old, normal self.

"Nothing," Oli says slowly. "Nothing, I thought maybe…"

"Listen, I appreciate the gesture." My mind is spinning a thousand thoughts at once, all of them jumbling over each other. Why would he want to get married so soon? What if he changes his mind? What if he realizes he made a mistake and rushed himself too much? What if he resents me down the track, and feels trapped because he didn't think this through? I shake my head and try to organize my words. "But you can't just ask me to marry you and then have us sign the papers fifteen seconds later!"

"Why not?" He cocks his head, and Lucas starts jumping up and down between us.

"What's married?" he cries. "Is that like, what mommies and daddies do?"

"Uh, yes, Lucas, that's exactly what that is," I say, distracted.

"Yay!"

"Grace," Oli slips two fingers beneath my chin, and tilts my face up towards him. "I know you've had terrible luck with males in the past. You told me you were pregnant and engaged once before, and the idiot up and left the country."

My words and thoughts completely disappear, and I stare at Oli's handsome, sincere face.

"I don't want you afraid, not even for a second, that it might happen to you again. I know that I want you. I know there's no chance I'll ever change my mind. Marry me, take me as yours, and let's just get on with the happily ever after part straight away."

My breath hitches in my throat. I can't even breathe right.

"I love you," I whisper, and he smiles and kisses my forehead.

"Then marry me. Right now."

"Okay…"

I lean into his chest, and Lucas laughs and squishes himself between our knees. As Oli's arms settle around me, I feel a warmth build in my chest—and build, and build, until suddenly I gasp and stand straight again, both hands fisted in his jacket as I look around me.

The air has changed color, glowing warm and golden in a circle around us.

"Oli," I breath. "Oli, what…?"

He bends to pick up Lucas again, before threading his fingers into my hair and pressing his forehead against mine. "It's alright, love. Everything's going to be okay."

The glow around us suddenly whirls to a head and shoots into the sky in a dazzling beam of light, spreading wide like a fountain before swirling down again in ribbons to dive into every tree around us, making the whole world a blinding, beautiful gold.

"Oh my god…"

Lucas laughs and reaches out, trying to touch the light, and the trees pulse with energy around us. Then the light shoots down into their roots, and for a moment I feel intimately connected with the earth, watching as the entire, massive network of roots underground lights up, showing the interconnected system underneath the entire town. They pulse for a few more moments, and then gently fade.

I turn tear-filled eyes back up to Oli, who smiles softly back at me.

"I don't understand," I choke, as he gently runs his thumb over my cheek. "Isn't this what happened at Ella's wedding? Isn't this only for Fated… For Fated Mates…" My brain finally starts working again as the thought clicks into place, and I snatch my arm out to grab his hand, spinning his wrist towards me as I push back his jacket.

He said his father had a Fated Mark, he said minotaurs got a mark on their wrist when they…

There, right where I had once thought I'd scratched the fur off his skin, is a perfect circle filled with what looks like a delicate, beautiful maze. Or a labyrinth, I suppose, given that he's a minotaur.

"I've loved you right from the start," he tells me quietly. "Right from the moment you first threw yourself into my arms and gave me a taste of what true joy could be. Only I was too blind to see it."

"Olistaire," I whisper, and I don't even try to hold back my tears anymore. I let them stream down my face. The weight I'd been carrying all these years, the fear of being hurt again, all of it disappears as I look into his eyes. "Stop being so sweet, you're going to kill me."

He snorts. "I hope not. Not now that I finally have you."

"Does this mean I'm

gonna get a good daddy, like the little boys in the stories on TV?"

My heart twists with a pang in my chest as I look at my boy, and guilt once again washes over me, as if Brad's shitty behavior was somehow my fault. But when I see the way Lucas is looking up at Oli, and the way Oli is looking back at him, I close my mouth and decide not to say a word.

"I hope so, little lamb," Oli says, and I don't miss how hoarse his voice has suddenly gotten. "I'm going to do my best."

"I already told you, silly!" Lucas snuggles into Oli's chest, resting his head on his shoulder. "You're way

more better than Brad."

Oli looks dumbstruck as he stares at Lucas's blonde head, and I smile, hooking my arm into his elbow and beginning us on our slow walk through the fall leaves again.

"He's right, you know," I murmur. "Look at the way he acts around you, my boy loves you."

"Yeah!" Lucas chimes in happily.

"You've been a better father to him than anyone else already, without even trying. You have it in you, Oli. You just have to trust yourself."

Oli swallows thickly and doesn't seem to know what to say.

He just looks at me with a confused, hopeful expression. When he stops walking and leans down to kiss me, Lucas cradled in his arms between us, it's like I can feel every hurt in his heart bleed away. His lips are soft against mine, his kiss gentle and sure and calmly fierce, somehow, just like the man himself. I pour all my heart and all my love back into him and hope it's enough to fill the both of us.

"Alright, so where are we meeting Ismelda?" I ask, as we start walking again. "I think I'm ready for my happily ever after, now."