17. Roman

Sasha shifts his position, camera in hand, and peers at the screen.

"Damn, Ro." He whistles as he scrolls through the photos. "These are going to be amazing. You sure you don't want to go back to modelling full time? You're…fucking hot."

He laughs and walks over to where I'm sprawled across a bright red velvet lounger we rented from a party supplier. I've worked nonstop for two weeks to finish all the pieces for my wedding collections. There are four different ones all together, each one with a variety of colours and slight differences in style for body type. Only photos of me modelling them will be on the site though.

Unless Perry volunteers to pose for a shoot, but I doubt it. And I won't admit that I still think of how sexy he was with a piece of lace around his hips. He wasn't even wearing a finished piece. Just some silk and lace hanging over his groin like he was a damn erotic caveman. And I certainly won't tell him his hard-on gave me the idea for a loincloth-type garment.

Fuck. I should talk to him.

"Ro?"

"Mmm?"

"I asked if you wanted to break for lunch and go through these images before the final set. You sort of spaced out on me."

"Sorry. Just thinking about launch day. It's getting close."

Rising off the lounger, I grab the robe nearby and slip it on as we head up the short flight of stairs to the kitchen.

"I can't believe we've got this much done so soon. Do you want to have a local party or something to celebrate? I could ask Malcolm at the bookstore to advertise, maybe? Oh! And the guy who does wedding cakes from home." Sasha pauses and leans against the counter while I rummage in the fridge for leftovers. "We should've arranged a wedding show to launch this. I wonder if we still should? What do you think?"

Placing all the Chinese food boxes on the counter along with plates, I think about it. It is a groom's wedding attire. Or whatever celebration they want it for. Hell, maybe they just want to wear it at home to feel good. I don't know if I want to just target weddings.

Placing Sasha's plate in the microwave, I sit at the table and study him.

"What do you want to do? It's your business, too. Do you want to do a photo gallery or something? Maybe not make it about weddings, but something else?"

The microwave pings and he switches our plates before sitting across from me.

"Romance? What if we just went with that as the theme? I know it's a small town, but the queer community here is a decent size and they'd support it. Not to mention the contacts we've both made since being here. What about that guy you met at the lodge? Bruce was it? Doesn't he have a big company?"

Sitting across from him with my lunch, I nod as I chew.

"Yeah, he's a buyer for an upscale department store somewhere. I have his card. He told me to call him. I forgot about that."

"So he wasn't that memorable then, huh?"

Sasha pins me with his stare.

"What do you mean?"

"Ro…you went to his room with his fiancé. A threesome doesn't stand out in your memory?"

I laugh out loud. "A threesome? Who told you that? We had wine in the lobby one night. I didn't sleep with him."

His eyes widen, and now I remember.

"Perry thinks I slept with them. He said that to you?"

"He may have mentioned that you were extra cozy with some guests before he got really silent and mad. I assumed." He raises his hands when my expression darkens. "You've hooked up plenty of times. I assumed what he saw was correct, and I didn't question it." He chews his lip and looks away. "I shouldn't have said anything. It was a joke, and it's not funny. I'm sorry."

I shouldn't be mad because Perry came to that conclusion. It's what I wanted him to think! But now… how do I keep making such horrible decisions?

"He saw me drinking with him. Laughing with him and leaving with him. That's it. The rest was his imagination. I haven't been with anyone since I've been here."

"Except Perry," Sasha adds.

"We made out in the kitchen once. Why are we even talking about this? We're supposed to be talking about the launch."

I'm not ready to talk about Perry. I think. Truth is, I should. He's all I can think about, and I've behaved like a royal asshole.

"Right. Romance. That was the theme, and we got sidetracked."

"Your studio is big enough to do an open house, isn't it?"

"Not if we supply some drinks and appetizers. We could rent a room at the art gallery. They have different-sized gathering spaces and even provide catering services. One stop shop."

"I don't know. We have a big enough social media presence and name recognition. Maybe we can have a private celebration with us and close friends of yours?"

I don't know why I'm not willing to commit to an event, but it doesn't feel right to me. Sasha seems to be fine without and shrugs as he scrapes up the last of his rice.

"I can do that, too. Whatever makes you comfortable."

After lunch, we finish the last set of photos, and Sasha leaves me for the evening. He and Leaf had agreed that 6 P.M. each night was a time for the two of them together. Sometimes alone and sometimes with friends, but always no work after 6 P.M.

Which is not how I operate.

With the launch a week away, the only thing I have left to do is load all the photos once Sasha finishes with them. So I'm at a loss. And I'm agitated. I've kept myself busy since Perry was in my workspace in all his naked glory. It was the hottest encounter I've had in a very long time. Just like the kiss in the kitchen, we combust when we come together.

And he wants more. His tender gaze was my undoing, and I ran out before I could let his words stick. Before I could accept that it could be real and more than just sex.

But he's stayed away since I told him I wasn't a more kind of guy. He knows this. And yet… I'm kind of pissed he's stayed away from me. No, it's not logical, but as I pace the basement and tidy up my workspace, the waves of anxiety grow.

I can't interrupt Sasha. I mean, I could, but I won't. And my sister has moved into her ‘I'm tired all the time' stage of pregnancy. But I need to stay occupied and work off whatever this odd, buzzy feeling is.

Perry has baskets of dirty clothes in the laundry room and I put a load in the wash for him. He has work clothes in the dryer, so I fold those and take them upstairs. I know he and Leaf have been working hard on renovating my old suite a second time. Hopefully, with no errors. It should be complete next week and mine to return to if I want.

And now that I have downtime, I know… I don't want.

I hate having no work to use as a distraction because now I have to overthink and analyze all these bullshit feelings.

Setting the pile of clean laundry on Perry's dresser, my gaze falls on his rumpled blankets and bed. No. Nope. I'm not thinking about this. Instead, I enter his ensuite bathroom, pick up all the towels he's left everywhere, and throw them down the laundry chute. It's really cool. I only learned about it because I was working downstairs and a giant thump scared the shit out of me. Any clothes sent through the chute drop directly in front of the washing machine. Genius. I bet it was Perry's idea, too.

I don't know when the last time he cleaned his bathroom was, but it's disgusting. Under the sink, I find cleaning supplies and make quick work of polishing his sink, counter and even his toilet. Caught up in the cleaning spree, I even spray his shower and step in to scrub it down.

"Normally, I wouldn't complain about coming home to find a sexy man in my shower. But what the hell are you doing?"

"Ah!"

The shower scrubber flies out of my hand and clatters at my feet. I spin to find Perry, arms crossed in front of his chest, while he leans against the doorframe. Those sinful lips curl into a sexy smile, and I can't help but stare.

"I, uh, just thought I'd do some cleaning for you. You know, you should really think about buying that stuff you spray on shower doors before you get out." I make a motion of spraying the glass with my empty hand. "Game changer."

His smile grows, and I gulp. He has a glorious smile. It's so… warm and genuine. And sexy. I've never met a man who could say so much without his lips moving.

"I'll keep that in mind when I'm shopping next."

He unfastens the buckles on his overalls and then pulls his shirt off over his head, leaving me with a wall of naked man chest. He next lets his overalls drop and now stands in front of me in nothing but his boxers, with one eyebrow arched in question.

"Are you joining me in the shower? I'm game if you are, but since you still have clothes on, it might get awkward."

"You should put the clothes down your laundry chute now. Why leave them in a pile like that?"

He cocks his head and, with a sigh, gathers his clothes and shoves them down the chute.

"Better?"

"Yes."

"So…"

He motions towards the shower, and I remember he asked if I was staying.

"Oh, I…I'll leave you to it."

"Suit yourself."

Perry strips his boxers off before I even leave the room and because I'm weak and a glutton for punishment, I turn to watch him in the shower. He faces forward and lets his head hang. The water runs over his muscled back and I stand there, wishing I might become a stray water droplet on his body. I don't know for how long, but it's enough to question my sanity.

"Offer still stands." Perry's voice carries over the sounds of the shower, and he's not even looking at me. Smug bastard. Assumes I'm still here… correctly.

With a huff, I finally leave the bathroom. And I most certainly don't think about him wet and naked. No, sir.

And to prove he's not currently taking up all my thoughts, I flop on his couch and flick on the TV. There're hundreds of channels but only one I really like to watch.

Wild Discovery.

Yeah, I know I'm as city as they come, but something about these shows sucks me in. The random animal facts are my version of crack and I can't get enough of them.

Pulling the blanket off the back of the couch, I curl my legs under me and snuggle into it while I listen to the narrator talk about moose. I've seen plenty of moose roadside in all my travels but never one close-up on foot. Thank god.

‘A mature moose can stand up to two meters tall at the shoulders.'

"That's what I'm saying, announcer guy! I don't want to meet that in the wild. No way."

"Who are you talking to out here?"

Perry strides into the room, hair still wet from his shower, and his plaid sleep pants hanging off his waist. One thing about Perry I've noticed the last few weeks is that he seems to hate wearing shirts around the house. I'm a fan.

He stops and watches the show for a moment and turns to look my way.

"You like this stuff?"

"Just because I hate your rubber boots and loud machines doesn't mean I don't like animals." I jut my chin out, prepared for a battle. "I find it extremely interesting and I like trivia."

He stares at me, absently rubbing his hand across his belly.

"Huh. No shit. Mind if I join you?"

"It's your house."

"Not what I asked."

He waits for my answer, and I pull the blanket closer.

"Sure."

A genuine smile fills his face and it certainly doesn't warm my heart or send my insides tingly.

"I'm going to make myself a drink. Would you like one?"

"What are you having?"

"Well, I found a new tonic water flavour. It's grapefruit. And I have this citrus gin I love. So that's what I'm making."

"That sounds amazing. I love grapefruit."

Perry smiles again before heading into the kitchen to make the drinks. He pulls out a liquor bottle from a small cupboard I"ve never noticed before and removes the tonic from the fridge.

"Do you like ice in yours?"

"Please. And a lime?"

"It's the only way, gorgeous."

My heart thumps a little more at the way he throws that pet name over his shoulder as he moves. He slices a lime and, if I'm not mistaken, he hums.

He hands me my glass before he sits next to me and he kicks his feet up on the coffee table. I take a small sip of the drink and sigh.

"Oh god, Perry, this is delicious."

"I'm glad you like it. It's one of my guilty pleasures."

"One of? You have more?"

He shrugs, a small smile on his lips. "I might. A gentleman never gives away all his secrets."

I can't help it and snort a laugh. "Gentleman? Pretty sure gentlemen don't wander around shirtless."

Again he shrugs. "Turn up the show if you're gonna snipe at me. I want to hear it."

I roll my eyes and increase the volume, anyway. The ice clinking in our glasses and the television show is the only noise, and it's so fucking domestic I don't know if I love it or hate it.

"I didn't know moose could dive up to 5 meters for food. That's cool. But also creepy. Could you imagine swimming along and kicking a moose?" I shudder. "No, thank you."

Perry's deep laugh shakes the couch. "That would even freak me out. Those things can be mean." He drains his glass and raises it. "Want another one?"

"I'd love one, but I should probably eat or I'll regret it."

"Well…it appears you're about to learn another secret then. Do you have allergies? Are you picky?"

"No allergies, and sometimes I'm picky. I don't like olives."

He takes my glass from me with a sly grin and again my heart dances.

"I promise you'll like this."

Despite not wanting to enjoy myself, I smile back and wonder what other secrets he has.