5. Chapter 5

Chapter five

I had never been an impatient person. Ever. With my kills, I often planned them out months, sometimes even years, in advance. I picked people by a code—a code which I followed to a tee. If they didn't meet the code, I left them alone. Which meant a lot of stalking, investigating, and hard work.

Murder was a full-time job, if you let it be.

However…I found myself impatient for my date Friday with Felix. I didn't understand why he'd wanted the date to be so far away. Winnie had teased me for the rest of the time she'd spent at my house, before heading off with explicit instructions that I was required to keep her updated at all times.

That was not happening.

The longer I had to wait, the more frantic my thoughts became.

Would Felix be as fun without murder involved? Would I enjoy talking to him? Would he enjoy talking to me? What if he didn't smell like I remembered? What if it was awkward? What if he cried again? What if it ended badly—and then we still had to live next to each other for the foreseeable future .

No, no.

I'd move.

Yes.

That's what I'd do.

If this date did not go well, I would move. I loved Beach Town— kinda —but I could settle somewhere else. Maybe there were other branches of The Club ? I would miss Allen, if I was being honest. The crematory was incredibly convenient for my hobby but…

I could bite back the compulsion, couldn't I? If I had to.

I could choose not to kill for a while if I had to move.

I'd done it before, I could do it again.

Maybe I was comfortable here, with my systems, my patterns, and my people—but I could abandon them. I could.

No.

Fuck.

Once again I was worrying myself into circles. This didn't serve anyone, least of all me.

Winnie's voice in my head whispered, okay bitch, so we've thought about what could go wrong. But what about…if it goes right?

What if Felix had a penchant for death like I did? We could…well… We could kill together, couldn't we?

And outside of that, there were other things that might be nice, right? Felix certainly didn't have landscaping skills, but he was an excellent crafter. It would make Christmas easy, wouldn't it? He could make presents for my siblings. They loved handmade stuff—which meant they always scoffed at my gifts, as I was not the kind of man who created anything but mayhem.

They'd love him, wouldn't they?

We'd have to work around the sun thing—but Winnie hadn't seemed all that fazed by it—and she was one of the judgiest people in my family. If Winnie could get behind it, everyone else could too.

Accommodating Felix in my life was as simple as investing in blackout curtains.

Yes.

And those blinds that Felix had.

We could work around anything with a little elbow grease and determination.

Oh! And on top of having a Christmas-gift-partner, I'd finally have someone to take with me to the company parties. I'd stop getting pitying looks—and Felix wouldn't wander the streets alone anymore. It was a win-win situation.

I'd always been single.

It wasn't that I was unattractive, truthfully I was quite aware of my good looks. They were the only thing I had going for me most days. What I lacked was a winning personality. It only took a solid thirty seconds for most people to realize that I was not the kind of man you wanted to spend extended periods of time with.

Which had never bothered me until now.

I didn't want Felix to think that about me .

He didn't seem to? If his reaction to my presence was any indication. He looked at me, not like there were screws loose, but like I was the screw he'd been missing. It was a nice look. Odd, but nice.

Things could go badly, yes.

But they could… wow .

They could go so so well.

I'd even put up with his cats if it meant he'd like me.

Being in a committed relationship didn't seem nearly as daunting as it had before.

Still…

Impatience won over. It was the Saturday before our date, and I was already over at Felix's house again, fist raised to knock. It was after dark, as I hadn't wanted to be rude—even though I was about to be very rude. The weeds were taunting me. There was only so much patience a man could possess when it came to proper lawn management.

Also maybe I missed him a little, and worried he'd been holed up alone for far too long. What if he was crying again? Don't mistake me for a kind-hearted person. I'm not. I was simply looking after my investment. Because that's what Felix was. An entertaining, cat wrangling, hat-wearing investment.

Knock, knock, knock.

When Felix opened the door, this time he pulled his hat off the second he saw me. Which kind of—maybe— definitely made me grin .

"Marshall?" He smiled shyly. "I thought our date was Friday?" His eyes looked darker than the last time I'd seen him. There was a smudge of dirt on his cheek like he'd been cleaning. When I glanced behind him, the hallway remained just as cluttered as it had been before. Perhaps he'd been working on the mess upstairs?

"It was. Is ." I sucked in a breath. "I just." I nearly lost my nerve. "Your lawn—"

"My lawn?"

It was overgrown. An eyesore. Ugly . With weeds that wagged toward the sky, scraggly and tall, and grass that broke up the sidewalk. All in all it was awful . I could tell him this. Yes! What a good idea. Delicately. I could tell him, and that would be why I came over. I could take care of his lawn—and have an excuse to be close to him every week.

I was. A. Genius.

I wouldn't even need an excuse!

Every Saturday like clockwork, I could manage his plants, and knock on his door after dark to see if he was as pretty as I remembered him to be.

I just needed to convince him.

Delicate , Marshall. Polite . This is the man you want to date. Be gentle.

"You have the ugliest lawn I've ever seen." The words were out before I could stop them. It was the truth, but I hadn't meant to say it quite so…bluntly.

Fix this, Marshall.

Fix it.

You need to fix it.

"It's awful. Truly horrendous." No, no. No. No. Oh fuck . "I mean—have you ever mowed it?"

Why wouldn't my mouth stop going?

Someone shoot me.

Please.

"It is quite ugly, isn't it?" Felix frowned, glancing out toward the raggedy foliage thoughtfully, like he was not offended at all—but instead contemplative. I'd complained before about this exact thing to the HOA, but I'd never complained directly to his face. Maybe I should have.

I hadn't expected this reaction.

Felix hummed, like he was actually listening to me.

Like my opinion mattered. Like he even agreed with me.

"It is." I wilted a little. "I…"

"You…?" Felix turned to look at me, dark eyes dancing. "Did you come all the way over here to tell me you hate my lawn?"

"Ah. Yes. No. " I had never felt like my skin was tighter than I did then, squirming a little despite being easily three times his size. I felt about an inch tall. "Can I…maybe…fix it?"

There . I'd done it.

Now he just had to agree and I'd have the perfect stalking opportunity every weekend.

We both had our strengths. His was creating what I assumed to be quality knick-knacks and mine was…lawn work? Yes. Lawn work. Stalking. And carrying dead bodies—but I was trying to expand on that, as it wasn't necessarily a marketable quality.

Couldn't put that on my goddamn resume.

Or my profile on a dating website.

Even if it was a very useful skill, depending on who you asked.

"You want to fix my lawn?" Felix cocked his head to the side, staring up at me with those lovely, dark eyes. "I mean…" He chewed on his lip. C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, Felix. "That would be nice, actually. Someone keeps complaining about me—and yard work is really difficult when I can't go out during daylight. It's always too late by the time I'm up to start mowing. I didn't want to be rude—I know you work early in the mornings."

When he laid out the facts like that it made me feel even worse that I was the one complaining about him. I supposed I'd never thought about it from his perspective. Every Saturday morning, like clockwork, I was out mowing and trimming my yard so it remained picture perfect. Felix couldn't do that. He was trapped indoors till the sun went down—and like he said—he couldn't very well start yard work at night.

There were several kinds of sun allergies. I'd researched them extensively, and while I didn't know what Felix possessed, I could only assume it was bad. Perhaps he had Solar Urticaria? And exposure to the sun caused hives.

Either way, working at night was not ideal.

It was loud, yes, but more importantly it was dangerous . There were a lot of blades involved—and the idea of Felix out in low visibility trying to trim his hedges because I'd complained was—no.

No.

"I'm going to take care of it from now on." Confidence felt good as I stared down at him, heart thudding. "Don't worry about it. No one is going to complain about you ever again."

Because I won't be, I thought but wisely didn't say.

Apparently I didn't need to drink alcohol to have annoying regrets.

"Will it wake you if I start tomorrow morning?" I asked, shifting to look at the lawn more critically. I'd need to get out my weed whacker, that was for sure. A lawn mower was not enough to tackle this beast. If my sister, Melissa, lived closer, I'd ask to borrow her riding lawn mower. She'd just gotten a John Deere 7345R, and had been bragging about how smooth a ride it was. It felt like I'd blinked and she'd popped forty kids out.

I could barely keep track of their names.

Okay, so that was a lie. I knew all their names. And had their birthdays memorized. And made sure to send money for them.

"I'm a deep sleeper," Felix grinned, leaning against the doorframe, watching me through his lashes. The little beauty mark beneath his eye mocked me. I'd never thought a mole was kissable before—but his certainly was. "It's never bothered me when you do your lawn in the morning."

Fuck, that hadn't even occurred to me.

Ooops .

"Okay," relieved, I twisted back to look at him. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Marshall." Felix laughed, his forehead still leaning against the frame as he watched me retreat. The only reason I could tell anything was amiss was because his hands were trembling. I wasn't certain why —maybe he was nervous around me after what we'd been through—but I'd just have to train him to trust me.

I had the capability of great violence, but I already knew that I could never raise a hand to Felix.

That wasn't who I was.

I hoped after our date, perhaps he wouldn't look so haggard—perhaps he'd feel safer knowing I was looking out for him.

"Have the police bothered you?" I asked, keeping my voice quiet. I probably shouldn't have brought that up—especially after we'd already said our goodbyes, but it was a thought that had been plaguing me. Felix had killed at his own home, after all. He'd brought his kill here—and that meant there was less room for error—not that there was ever much room for that, all things considered.

"No," Felix shook his head. There was an almost guilty look on his face. "I don't think they will, either."

"No?" I frowned, curious. "Why do you say that?"

"I just…yeah. I don't think they will. "

Over-confident, but that was okay. I'd make sure he had an alibi if I needed to. I would take care of this. I made that vow to myself.

Because he was an investment—just like my car, or my stocks. And that meant he needed to be looked after.

"Have a good night," I said for a second time, still flushed. I hate to admit this but I was a little excited that I now had an excuse to spend more time on this side of the street. Sure Felix would be asleep—which meant there wouldn't be opportunity for chatting, or seeing his little grin while he dodged my questions.

But…being close to him was enough.

I inhaled, sighing when a waft of his lovely lemon shampoo tickled my senses.

Yes.

Yes .

That was why I was doing this.

Lemons. His smile. The mystery—the opportunity to be entertained.

Not because I liked him. Of course not. That would be silly.

It wasn't my fault he smelled good and had a nice smile. Those were just facts.

"You too," Felix smiled at me. His hands were still quaking as he slipped back inside his house and shut the door. It was odd, how fast he'd retreated—but I didn't mind. Perhaps he had something to do? That was fine .

If I'd been less oblivious, I maybe would've connected the dots. Would've realized that the reason Felix quaked was not because of fear or nerves, but because of me.

But I didn't.

Instead, I spent a half hour wandering his yard, making plans for the Sunday morning to get started. When I returned across the street to my own home, I was buzzing with excitement.

If only I'd known then, what was about to happen.

Maybe I could've prepared better.

Maybe.