23

8 June 1804

Hunsford Parsonage, Kent

Dear Charlotte,

Thank you for your most recent letter, my dearest friend. I am pleased to hear that there are no lingering rumours in Meryton of my marrying your brother, fond of him though I am. I can only hope that his plans to purchase Netherfield whenever the Bingleys quit the place will not intensify my mother’s intentions for me in that quarter. I intend to remain away from Longbourn, so with any luck my mother will soon take some new scheme into her head; I should be much relieved if she ceased to think of me all together.

That is just what I fear Captain Darcy has done. Today marks two months since he left Kent so abruptly. It is selfish of me to mourn the day so mawkishly, when I know it is he who has true cause to grieve. To lose a father, and then a brother – and then to see a childhood friend hanged for murder, despite their years of enmity – I cannot imagine the pain and suffering of his family. And that the local vicar should actually duel the master of Pemberley – the village gossip and what has been in the papers must only compound the Darcys’ tribulations.

Even so, I am a selfish creature, for I still long to have some word from him. ‘Tis maudlin of me to repeat what I confided in you on my birthday, but I had truly believed Captain Darcy’s assurance that he felt himself bound to me. Have recent events altered that, or perhaps diminished my importance to him? Certainly his mother and sister must be desolate, and I know I have no right to hope for a place in his heart at such a time.

I wonder, sometimes, if he blames Jane for all that has happened. Sometimes, I do so myself. Had she not helped Caroline compromise Marcus Darcy, their father would not have perished from the shock and disgrace of it. And perhaps if Marcus Darcy had not been bedeviled by such a wife, he would not have taken such a risk in dueling Mr. Wickham. I apologise that I cannot share more of the particulars on that score, but I feel myself obligated to maintain some discretion for Captain Darcy’s sake. What I have written is damning enough.

But am I tainted by my association to Jane, in his estimation? Can he think of me only as a reminder of so much duplicity and death? Moreover, am I the greatest of fools for torturing myself with such thoughts? I shall look forward to your wisdom, on which I have always relied, to put me more at ease, if such a thing can be managed.

Perhaps you ought to come and visit us in Kent, for Colonel Fitzwilliam has resigned his commission and taken possession of Rosings Park, since Captain Darcy is now the master of Pemberley. Lydia would be wild with envy if you were to catch his eye; I should be pleased to see him attached to a worthy woman, for he is a very civil and amusing neighbour. Though he is no substitute for his cousin, he has done much to recommend himself to all the neighbourhood – and like his cousin, he has singled Mr. Collins out. What Captain Darcy taught my new brother in matters of literacy, Colonel Fitzwilliam has done the same with levity.

And so I hope you shall remind me to savour the delights of my present companions, rather than lamenting those who remain absent. Kitty’s child grows daily her belly, which is now quite noticeable, Mr. Collins is fixated upon making every manner of pun a dozen times a day, Lady Catherine remains an unrelenting source of insolent amusement, and the weather has turned warm and bright. Write soon and consider joining us, for then my contentment will certainly increase.

Yours affectionately,

Lizzy

***

20 June, 1804

150 North Street, Brighton

Dear Jane,

I must begin by asking that you read this letter privately; I have much to tell you, though I know the substance of it will give you pain. You may be aware that during my stay in Shropshire with the Hursts, my step-brother arranged for me to travel to Brighton. Your youngest sister Lydia is here as my companion, though her primary object is throwing herself into the path of every officer she encounters – I daresay this part will not shock you in the least.

I am aware of what your husband has told you, that I have been unwell since the death of my husband. The truth is that I am with child – and it is not my late husband’s child that I carry. My sister was greatly displeased by this discovery, hence my expulsion from her home a fortnight ago, when the doctor confirmed my condition.

Jane, brace yourself for something terribly dreadful, for I must confess that I took a lover after my husband’s death. I was terribly frightened for my future, fearing that if I was not with child, I would lose Pemberley and all that you and I worked for. Captain Darcy must have suspected something about it, though I know not how. Perhaps he even wished to bed me himself, for he barged into my room late one night, drunk and angry. I was consoling Charles, who was weeping for Marcus, as I was myself. Captain Darcy went into a rage like nothing I have ever seen, and began to perversely suggest that it was my own brother I had taken as a lover!

It must have been jealousy that fueled his fury; I cannot otherwise account for such a flagrant misapprehension. He was quite beyond all reason, and poor Charles could do nothing to placate him. The horrible beast forced me to sign a confession that the baby shall have no Darcy blood nor any claim to Pemberley, and then expelled us from the house the following morning, despite my all attempts to apologise and explain my moment of weakness.

Having nowhere else to go, and not wishing to intrude on you and Charles so soon after your marriage, I fled to the Hursts’ estate in Shropshire. When I wrote to Charles of my circumstances, admitting that I had done what I had to do to bear a child, he had no pity for my desperation. It was for his own sake that he contrived this scheme that will conceal my condition from the world. As a respectable widow, nobody here in Brighton will suspect the child’s true parentage, and when it is born, the babe will be adopted by a family of his choosing – no doubt far removed from Netherfield and Pemberley. Lydia will simply be told that I delivered a stillborn, and shall be instructed never to speak of it again, to avoid causing me any pain or distress.

You have ever been my loyal friend, dearest Jane, and I beg you will show me mercy at such a time. You must endeavour to aid me in reconciling with my brother, who has been miserly indeed. Though Captain Darcy has returned my dowry to me, it shall not be enough to live on without some support from Charles after the baby is born and I return to London in February. He must do something for me, else I shall never manage to secure a second grand marriage, and attain all that you and I have dreamt of together.

I beseech you to work whatever changes you can upon your husband on my behalf, and urge him to reconcile with Captain Darcy if he can. To lose the connection would be a great loss indeed, and if the child is a girl, she might enjoy some support from the Darcys without disrupting the succession of Pemberley. After all, I succumbed to my weakness for only one night, after so many months wed to Marcus. Certainly the child could be his – it is far likelier. Captain Darcy has been a good friend to Charles in the past, and surely he would not be so cruel to an innocent babe.

Do write as soon as you are able, and for God’s sake burn this letter directly.

Your devoted sister,

Caroline Darcy

***

24 June 1804

Netherfield Park, Hertfordshire

Dear Lizzy,

How I miss you! It has taken me longer than it ought to have, to forgive you for not attending my wedding. I understand why you would not wish to, for I have grown lonely enough to feel the gravity of what I did to deserve your rebuke in Kent. I hope you understand that I intended to secretly disoblige Caroline, though it seemed as though Captain Darcy did not tell you how I had thrown myself on his mercy and begged him to play along with a scheme I had designed to fail.

I cannot undo the actions that led to your separation from the man you love, whom I know loves you in return. I did what I could in Kent to prevent Lady Amelia from engaging his honour and attaching herself to him, and I cherish some hopes even now that you will be united with him once his mourning is over. I wish the both of you every happiness, truly, though he has had some quarrel with Charles.

My husband will not speak of it to me, and I have given up my attempts to discover the truth of what caused the breach in their friendship in the weeks following his brother’s death. I have heard nothing from Caroline since then, either. As you may have heard, Lydia is staying with her in Brighton, for it was Charles’s idea that the two might make agreeable companions. His step-sister is likely to prove a worthier chaperone than young Mrs. Forster with so many officers in the area, and Lydia’s liveliness may be a balm to the grieving widow.

We have been eager for word from them, and this morning we received a letter from Lydia. Though it contained as much nonsense about officers as you might imagine, my poor husband was so relieved to have news of their safety and comfort that he opened the letter directly before bringing it to me – Mamma was present, and how she scolded him for opening my letter! He has promised to be more careful – he really is such a dear man. We were both surprised that there should be no accompanying missive from Caroline; I begin to wonder if she was more attached to Marcus Darcy than I had supposed, and grieves a great deal. Lydia communicated nothing significant about her companion, beyond complaints at being obliged to behave well.

Though I worry for Caroline, I confess I am relieved she has not returned to Netherfield. Perhaps that horrible secret from last October might be laid to rest at last. Though Charles will not speak of what happened at Pemberley, I suppose he is likewise entitled to a secret of his own. It is all in the past. And so I hope that you, too, will be willing to put it all behind us. Though I am content to be settled so near to Longbourn, it has not been the same in your absence. I miss my favourite sister desperately, and hope for a kind word from you ere long.

All my love,

Jane Bingley

***

24 July 1804

Cameron Court, Yorkshire

Dear Lizzy,

It has been a month and you have not written, and though I know it is unlikely you should have replied in the last three days, I wanted to be sure you knew of my new direction. As you can see, we have given up Netherfield.

It was quite the work of a moment! About a fortnight ago, Mamma and I had a row and Charles was more upset about it than even I was. A few days later, I had the pleasure of informing him – and now you are to be the second person to know – that I had missed my courses for two months. I believe I am with child! Charles fears that Mamma shall agitate me if I am indeed in such a delicate condition, and I daresay he is quite right. He set about looking for an estate for us and we found one exactly suited to us in a matter of days! It was all settled in great haste. I recall one evening at Netherfield that Charles made a comment about his rapidity in acting on his inclinations – that if he chose to quote one place in favour of another, he would act with alacrity. Captain Darcy thought his impulsivity was ill-advised, but even you came to my husband’s defence.

And acting with such expedience is just what we have done. We arrived three days ago, and I am already quite certain we shall be happy here. The house is about the size of Netherfield or a little larger, and the surrounding countryside is far superior. The gardens may require some work, but the warm weather shall allow me to occupy myself very happily in restoring them. Until I feel the quickening, I mean to devote myself to furnishing and improving our new home.

Cameron Court is not thirty miles from Pemberley. I believe it no mere coincidence, though we have not heard from Captain Darcy since April. This morning Charles received the letter he had sent his old friend, informing him of our presence here – it had been returned unopened. Charles will not speak of it, and says that it is nothing, but I know it pains him.

As much as I enjoy my correspondence – what little of it I have – it seems to ever be a source of vexation for my husband and I. The row that he and I had with Mamma was because I received another letter from Lydia and Mamma snatched it away to open, as she was present when Charles brought it to me. She said that it looked as though it had been opened and then resealed, and she proceeded to give half our servants a terrible scolding. They all denied her accusations, and then she recalled an incident when Charles had accidentally opened a letter from Lydia to me, and she began to suggest he was the culprit. He confessed that he had once again been too hasty to hear news of Caroline, and I was rather cross with him, but after I told him my happy news, we have reconciled.

Strange as it is that I have heard nothing from Caroline, I find that I am more relieved than anything else, though her silence does seem rather forboding. It is you whom I wish to hear from above anybody else, dear sister. I must again apologise for every wrong I have done you, and beg your forgiveness. How I wish you would write, and perhaps even agree to visit us here at Cameron Court, for it is such a charming house. There are an impressive sixteen guest rooms, and one in particular that I have appointed exactly to your tastes, and it is very near the library; it shall be for your particular use whenever you are with us. How I long to see you; you are ever in my thoughts, and these happy musings now tend toward imagining what adoring aunt you shall be.

Your loving sister,

Jane Bingley

***

29 July, 1804

257 Gracechurch Street, London

Dear Lizzy,

I cannot tell you how sorry I am that we were obliged to postpone our visit to Kent. Your account of Kitty’s happiness and Mr. Collins’s pleasing alterations, as well as the charming Taylors, were all such tempting inducements to travel, had your uncle’s business not kept us in Town.

We do mean to travel in about a month, though I confess my heart is set on Derbyshire, perhaps even the Lake District. I long to see some old friends in my home village, Lambton, which is not five miles from Pemberley. And we might break our journey at Jane’s new home in York; I know she is eager for visitors.

I had hoped you might consent to accompany us. The Collinses have been ever so kind in allowing you to remain with them, and of course your father would put his foot down with your mother, should you desire to return home to Longbourn – even Edward is willing to intercede, if you wish it.

But you are welcome with us at any time, in London as well as on our travels – especially the latter. Kitty worries for your low spirits; perhaps a change of scenery may do you some good. And, in truth, I wish to see you reconciled to Jane. I know you shall be a most devoted aunt when Kitty’s babe is born – does not Jane’s child hold the same claim on your affection?

I will not press you to divulge what you were resolved to keep secret over the winter, but whatever has happened between you – can it not be forgiven? Truly, Lizzy, your sister loves you and misses you a great deal, and she has ever been your dearest friend.

I will say no more on that matter, though I will insist you consider our invitation.

The children and Edward send you their love, as do I,

Aunt Madeline

***

8 August 1804

Hunsford Parsonage, Kent

Dear Aunt Madeline,

Thank you for your last letter. I must assure you, I am not so low in spirits as Kitty would have you think. I have become intimate friends with the Miss Baileys, as well as Kitty’s excellent Mrs. Taylor, and I find the company of my brother and sister more pleasant with each passing day. Papa, Mary, and Charlotte are faithful correspondents, and so I am quite content.

I would be amenable to travelling with you, if your destination was anywhere else but Derbyshire. It would be too painful. I have heard nothing from Captain Darcy since his departure four months ago. To be so near Pemberley when the family is in mourning and my friendship is clearly no longer of interest to him would be mortifying. I understand he has even broken with Mr. Bingley; I know none of the particulars, but I can only surmise he wishes nothing to do with any of my family.

I shall remain content here in Kent until Kitty’s babe arrives in early October, and then perhaps a visit to London shall be in order. My dear sister is at my side, and urges me to tell you that your whole family is quite welcome to visit the parsonage whenever you are able to do so, even if it is but a short visit. And now my brother is echoing this sentiment with considerable eloquence!

We are making ready to attend an assembly in the village this evening; I am to dance the first with Colonel Fitzwilliam, and though Kitty has grown too round to dance at all, she is delighted that my dancing partners – one of them at least – shall make Lydia wild with envy when she hears of it. Perhaps if she tires of her chaperone in Brighton, she might be induced to visit us, too!

I hope I have assured you that I am content enough – I wish the same for you all in Gracechurch Street, and send you all my love.

Hugs and kisses to you all,

Lizzy

***

9 August, 1804

Rosings Park, Kent

My dear cousin,

As I have done in all my previous letters this summer, I must remind you that I think you a great coxcomb. I hope your mother and sister are in good health, and yourself as well, fool that you are.

Last night I had a pleasure that ought to have been yours, in dancing twice with Elizabeth Bennet at a local assembly. While her company and conversation are superior to anybody in the county save the Collinses and Taylors, I am sad to say I could not call her as agreeable a partner as I had hoped.

She is sickly and pale, Darcy. The light in her eyes has been slowly dimming these four months, and when I remarked that yesterday marked four months since your departure, she looked as though I had struck her. I feared she would weep, or leave the dance floor altogether.

It is the only occasion when we have spoken of you, in all this time. Whenever I mention you, she swiftly changes the subject, and she has never spoken your name to me, never inquired after you as she has done about your mother and sister. The omission speaks volumes, I believe; she is resolved to torture herself; a less interested person might have a little something to say about a mutual acquaintance.

And it is all your own doing, you brooding buffoon. Marcus is gone, your father is gone, and I know it breaks your heart. But would it not shatter what remains in your chest for this beautiful creature to waste away pining for you?

I shall send no weekly report on Rosings; if you wish to know how matters are progressing, you can damn well come to Kent and see for yourself. Indeed, I think there is a great deal you need to see here in Kent.

Yours impatiently,

Colonel Richard Fitzwilliam

***

16 August, 1804

Pemberley, Derbyshire

Richard,

I, too, shall begin my letter as I have done several times now, by reminding you that Pemberley is a wretched place at present.

We were not yet past our bereavement over my father before losing Marcus. This grief is compounded by a thousand other complications. The local gossip about Marcus’s murder at the hands of the vicar, a long-time friend of the family, has made all commerce in the village insupportable. Marcus had not been a diligent master since father’s passing, and estate matters are in disarray. The incident we experienced the night before the Bingleys departed in April still plagues me. In truth, the loss of Bingley’s friendship is a heavy blow, more so than I had expected, for his actions were unforgivable.

Worst of all, Georgiana will hardly speak to anybody. She is fortunately past the dangers of there being any lasting repercussions from her dalliance with Wickham, but her heart is devastated. Wickham promised her consolation in her grief for our father, and she was vulnerable enough to need an escape from a family in mourning and such a person as the former mistress of Pemberley.

A man she had known all her life and had entrusted her future happiness to instead took advantage of her and made it plain that he sought only her money and had involved her close friend in his betrayal. And then he killed our brother, and was subsequently tried at the assizes and hanged.

She spends her days weeping in her room, scarcely eats, sleeps a vast deal, and will hardly say a word, even when spoken to. I bought her a new pianoforte, and she has never even touched it.

My mother is little better. She has played the new instrument, but only to fill the house with more melancholy tunes than I had imagined could exist. She, too, hardly speaks or eats, and while Georgiana sleeps a vast deal too much, our mother scarcely rests at all.

And so you must understand that travel is quite impossible for me. And in the instance to which you refer, I have come to believe it is wholly unnecessary. It pains me to say it, but I have come to believe that it is more likely that Miss Bennet has simply decided to forget me. Such a choice I cannot account for, but in supposing all that has passed with Caroline and Mrs. Bingley must remain an insuperable barrier.

And so I must direct my attention where it is most needed, at home. I do wish you would write oftener, to all of us here at Pemberley. I should like not only updates on Rosings, but to hear of your life there. How do the Collinses get on? Is my friend preparing to be a proud papa? And does Miss Bennet remain with them – is she to become a permanent fixture? I had understood she meant not to return to Longbourn. Do give my regard to the Taylors, and if you must, to Lady Catherine.

Your miserable cousin,

Captain Fitzwilliam Darcy

***

257 Gracechurch Street, London

24 August, 1804

Dear Lizzy,

I have considered our travel plans. We have instead decided to travel to York for Christmas, as your parents and sisters will do, and then Edward and I will journey on to Lambton for a few days in the new year, while the children stay with Jane at Cameron Court. Your uncle and I have not travelled alone together since our honeymoon together, so we are very pleased with the scheme.

And so we might journey anywhere you like next month, though I believe we must decide quickly. If there is no particular destination that appeals to you, I might suggest Brighton. I recall you enjoyed our sojourn in Sanditon very much, particularly the sea-bathing, which must do wonders for your health – Kitty tells me your health has still remained poorly.

And of course, your youngest sister is there – we ought to make sure Lydia is not driving the widow Darcy out of her senses. I met Marcus Darcy a few times when he was a boy, and I should like to pay my respects, as well. And Lydia has no doubt made such a wide range of acquaintance already that we shall be in no want of invitations, perhaps there shall even be a ball or assembly – for which we must require new gowns!

Kitty wishes Lydia to be at Hunsford, as well as yourself, for the birth of her child in October, and I understand the new master of Rosings may be some inducement for Lydia to part with the officers. We might remain several weeks in Brighton and then your uncle and I shall convey you both back to Kent before returning to London at the end of September.

Do write of your agreement to such a happy scheme, dearest Lizzy.

Your most determined aunt,

Madeline Gardiner

***

31 August, 1804

Pemberley, Derbyshire

Richard,

I may have to go to Kent to beat you about the head in person. While my mother and sister were delighted to receive letters from you, I am wounded by your neglect – and vexed that you will not send over the matters of business I requested. But your suggestion to the ladies was well-received, and so I must congratulate you on bending me to your will.

We are making ready to travel even now, and hope to arrive at Rosings by late in the afternoon on September 4th.

Begrudgingly yours,

Captain Fitzwilliam Darcy

***

31 August, 1804

Hunsford Parsonage, Kent

Dear Aunt Madeline,

I am touched by your willingness to postpone your visit north, as I know it meant a great deal to you. I can make no arguments against your scheme; indeed I did enjoy the seaside a vast deal. A little sea-bathing would certainly help ease my broken heart. And I believe you are correct that we ought not let Lydia remain so often with her current companion.

I shall post this express, for I should like to depart at once, if it is agreeable to you. We are engaged for dinner tomorrow with the Taylors, and a few nights after that with the Baileys. However, if you are in earnest about spending the next month complete in Brighton, I can be ready for you to collect me on the morning of September 4th. I must thank you for proposing a plan that brings me much joy and excitement.

Your delighted niece,

Lizzy