Chapter 38

AUGUST 8 – MONDAY 3:33 PM

R en

When we started this project, I wasn't sure if we were going to pull it off. As I watched Theo apply the fourth clear coat to the Shelby, excitement flowed like a river through me. He'd been here every day working on it, and as soon as I finished morning training with Nash, I would join. Sometimes Blake helped or went on food and supply runs, but it was a team effort. Even Liam stopped by for a couple of days and worked on replacing the seats that had finally arrived. Liam and I stared at one another and didn't say much other than the odd comment perfectly timed to when Theo left the room. I felt like I was in a boxing ring, sitting in my corner and sizing up my opponent. Neither of us wanted to give away what we were thinking or feeling.

I didn't press Theo for answers. He'd made it clear he wasn't going anywhere, and that was all I needed to know for now. As long as Liam didn't start pulling shady shit, we would be fine…I hoped.

"Hey, what's going on in here?"

I whipped around at the sound of Myles's voice. "You can't be in here. What are you doing here?" I jogged to the door, but it was too late. He could see through the clear sheets we'd strung up—like we were in an episode of Dexter—as our painting booth.

Myles looked at me like I'd lost my mind, and my heart sank. Sighing, I stepped out of his way. "You weren't supposed to be here until your birthday. I had this whole thing planned to give you your gift, and we'd have dinner, and Blake said he'd look after Lip. I thought we could catch up on some alone time."

His eyes locked with mine, and he cupped my face. I wasn't sure I'd ever get used to looking into his amber eyes filled with so much love. He dropped his lips to mine and kissed me softly.

"Yer incredible, Snowflake. Ya didn't have to do anything for my birthday."

"Don't be ridiculous. Of course, I did." Grabbing his hand, I walked him over just as Theo turned the sprayer off and cracked the plastic to slip out.

"Hey brotha," Myles greeted as Theo stripped out of the white hazmat suit. The two of them bumped knuckles.

"I hope you like it. I put on an extra coat just for you," Theo said, and Myles touched the clear plastic, smoothing it out to look inside the booth.

"Where did ya get a Shelby?"

"It's the one the school let me keep. It was still in rough shape, so Theo, Blake, and Liam have been helping me finish it for you."

"For me?"

"Yeah, this is your birthday gift. She is completely restored, and I even ordered this custom ice blue color for you. There are a few hidden snowflakes worked into the paint and interior." I smiled wide.

Myles's mouth fell open, looking from me to the car. Suddenly, his eyes filled with tears, and he turned away.

"I'll give you two some time to talk," Theo said and walked out of the shop.

"Myles, what's wrong? If you don't like it…." He reached out for me as he wiped tears away. "What's going on? I thought you'd be happy. I didn't mean to make you cry."

"Come with me. We need to talk."

My heart hammered with trepidation as he linked our fingers and led me outside. Lip was playing catch with Blake out front, but Myles guided me toward the picnic table behind the cabin.

"You're scaring me, Myles," I said, the fear of whatever he was going to say making me antsy.

"I'm sorry, Snowflake. Sit for a minute."

I slowly sat down and watched him pace. Myles walked toward me, and his eyes were pools of worry. Cupping my face, he dropped his lips to mine, and I melted into him. I'd missed him so much and hated that he wouldn't let me stay with him and Lip for a few nights.

He stopped kissing me but kept his lips against mine as if he didn't want to lose contact. "No one has given me a birthday gift since my ma passed away," he said, and my heart constricted. "I love the car, I love you, I…shite." He closed his eyes.

"I'm sorry that your father is such a prick. I hate that you've gone through so much. Just when I think you've told me all the terrible things he's done or could do, you tell me more."

Myles snorted. "I don't tell anyone everything, not even you, Snowflake. The things he's made me do or has done to me would haunt ya, and our time is precious. I dinnie want any of his taint coating what we have."

I laid my hands on his and wanted to cry. God bless his mother, who'd protected him as much as she could. There was no telling what he would've become without her.

"I understand. I don't like it, and I will pester you for answers, but I get why you don't want to say. If you love the car, then what's wrong?" He closed his eyes, and I could feel him shaking.

"I know I've said this before, but I can't lose ya, Snowflake. I just can't."

I kissed him. "You're not going to."

"Ya may change your mind after my birthday." He pulled back and stood in front of me. I'd never seen him so conflicted before. "I've been avoiding this conversation. Part of me was hoping that if I ignored it, then it wouldn't happen."

"What are you talking about?"

He ran his hands through his hair and swore. Sucking in a deep breath, we locked eyes. "When we turn eighteen, we go through an initiation to take our role within the family officially. Nash already had his, and I'm next."

Ice-cold fear rippled down my back. "What kind of initiation?"

"I won't know until that day, but Lawrence makes it a whole thing. Think of a cult on crack ceremony, from what Nash told us. We weren't allowed to attend his, and he doesn't say much about it, but it was bad."

Standing from the bench—I couldn't sit any longer—I paced as my mind ran. All I could think of was the night Owen had almost beaten him to death.

"Myles…are they going to beat you again?"

He bit his lip. "I don't know. They might, or it could be worse."

"Worse? Worse than almost being beaten to death? What is worse?"

"They could ask me to do things that I'll be forced to refuse, and they'll kill me for it," he said matter-of-factly, and my mouth fell open.

"Like what?"

He looked away and stuffed his hands into his pockets. "Hunt people through a forest like an animal and kill them after I rape them," he said. I stumbled back and almost fell on my ass.

"Oh. My. God." I walked back to the bench and sat down. Staring at the ground, I tried to wrap my head around forcing my child to do something so despicable. They were worse than I could have imagined. "But this may not happen?"

"It may not, but I know my Da, and he is still pissed that I refused to marry Fiona. He's not going to go easy on me. The initiation is his chance for payback. My only saving grace is that a rival family is holding Devin captive. I'm his heir now since Lip is too young, and Da is obsessed with lineage and making sure that our ‘seed' carries on." Myles walked away, but when he turned around, he looked horrified. "I cannie do it," he said, his accent coming through strong with intense emotion. "I won't fuck another, and definitely not against their will. I know what it would do to us, and I might as well end things now because I'd never be able to look in your eyes again. I've done so many horrible things in my short life, but this…I'm not a rapist. I won't, not for myself and not for us. There are some lines that ya just can't come back from."

My lower lip trembled, and the first few tears slipped free. "But if you refuse…."

"Then these could be our last days together, Snowflake, and it's killin' me as surely as if they reached in and ripped out me heart." Jumping up, I wrapped my arms around his waist and held him as tightly as I could, tears steadily falling. He held me back just as tight. This couldn't be happening.

"I can't lose you either, Myles, I won't. I love you too much. What if we run?" I looked up at him, and he just stared at me. "Please tell me we can run?" He shook his head, and the tears turned into sobs as I clung to him.

"I'm so sorry, Snowflake. If I were a different man, maybe I could do it and walk on like nothing happened but…."

I pulled back and poked him in the chest. "Don't. Don't you dare apologize to me for being a decent guy. I wouldn't love you the way I do if you could walk in there and hurt someone like that and walk away." My lower lip trembled. "There has to be another way. What if I go with you? What if we find a way to use the knowledge of my family to help you?"

Myles shook his head. "Naw, not a chance. I won't even hear of it. We don't know what Lawrence already knows, and ya don't give a snake extra venom. Trust me, my da and Lawrence would squeeze every last drop out of you they could get and then still kill me. I'll go. I don't see another way."

"I may have figured something out." I jerked when Nash spoke and looked over my shoulder to see him standing by a tree with his arms crossed over his chest. "I can't promise it'll work, but I can promise that the favors I've called in are your best shot at staying alive."

"What did ya do?"

Nash pushed away from the tree and came toward us. I couldn't help wondering what he was forced to do for his initiation, and if whatever it was caused the haunted look in his eyes.

"Before I say anything, I need you both to know that it may not work, and I don't hold any sway in the final decision. You both know what my father and Owen are like."

"I'm desperate. Tell me. I'll do anything," Myles said, and Nash nodded.

"Alright. Princess, I'll need a moment alone with Myles."

I wanted to argue, but it seemed Nash was our best chance. Myles hugged me and then kissed the top of my head.

"The less ya know from this point on, the better, love. Please."

Sighing, I nodded and walked back to the cabin. I managed to keep myself from falling apart until I walked through the bedroom door and closed it. This had to work. Myles deserved so much more from this world than what it had already handed him, and selfishly, I couldn't lose him…I didn't know if I'd survive.

No…I know I wouldn't.