CHAPTER 2

Bastian

The thing about being best friends with Micah was that he genuinely made everything better and life was easier around him.Micah was a firecracker on his best days and a spitfire on his worst, though he'd never cop to such a thing. He was a stubborn fucker like that, but it was one of the things I loved most about him. He didn't fold easily.He might like to think he was just a nerd, invisible to others and uninteresting to most, but that was the furthest thing from the truth. My best friend had a glow about him, an inner light that drew people to him.At least it worked on me.

I vividly remembered the day I first noticed him in class in seventh grade.He was not so sneakily playing this Carmen Sandiego game while we were supposed to be doing God knows what assignment, but it was the look on his face that distracted me.He had this intensely focused stare, but little spurts of excitement or frustration or confusion would pass across his features just from playing that stupid game. I couldn't help but think how fascinating it was to see.His face was this open book that ran the gamut of emotions, and for some reason, I couldn't look away.It was also fairly entertaining to witness. Don't ask me why, I'm not even sure what it was specifically that fascinated me so much, but it was just…Micah.I had thought that if I didn't try talking to him, I'd be missing out on something important.Something vital. Shit, was I right about that one.

That day turned out to be one of the most significant of my life and I came out of it being friends with the most incredible, genuine person I've ever met. It was crazy how after that day it felt like something snapped into place for me. I was left with the unshakable feeling like Micah and I had known each other our entire lives. After that day, we were basically inseparable.We were frequent visitors to each others' houses, and his parents Tom and Faith had adopted me into their family without a second thought.I always jumped at the chance to go to Micah's house and spend time with him and his family because, honestly, those were some of the only times I felt like I had a real family.

I loved my mom and we used to be close, but she had been fighting major depression since I was about six years old. You never knew how she"d be day to day. She could either be vibrant, loving and warm…or she'd be shut down and empty.I didn't even want to think about the relationship I had with my dad.Let's just say he wasn't the adoring family man he portrayed to his friends, neighbors and constituents.It never got any easier to deal with, but the Russo's made up for it with how they treated me as a second son. And then there was my best friend who made it all bearable just by being him. He was the good erasing all of the bad.

With my hand firmly on his lower back, I guided Micah to the elevators and we headed out of his dorm to the party. I"m not really sure what prompted me to put my hand on Micah like that, but it almost happened without thinking. Some part of me just reached out to him reflexively. It was…nice.

His friend Jonas was throwing a party with his roommates at their off campus house.Most of them were involved in one sport or another, so their parties were guaranteed to draw a huge crowd and they were lucky if the cops weren't called before midnight.Since it was the last big party of the year before everyone went home for summer break, it was bound to be a rager complete with lots of booze, lots of music, and lots of sex.I mean, that wasn't something I was interested in tonight.Micah didn't know it, but I wasn't as big on the hookup scene as he probably thought I was. I was fairly private about my sex life with everyone, but where I would usually tell Micah everything about my life, it felt somehow wrong to tell him about one night stands that didn't mean anything to me.

I couldn't exactly pinpoint why I felt that way, but it twisted my gut to think of him having those details and images in his head.That's why there were some things he was unaware of that would need to be shared before he moved to Austin next week.The problem was I didn't know how to tell him and I was worried about what would happen when he finally found out.But I wasn't going to think about that right now.Now, I just wanted to focus on my best friend and having a badass night together before he left Dallas behind and started his new life with me at UT.

There was just a slight issue I was facing, and that was the fact that Micah looked hot as hell tonight. I was having a hard time keeping my eyes off him.It had happened slowly over time, but I started recognizing that I was looking at Micah differently than I had about a year ago.Suddenly, it became too easy to focus on his deep, espresso colored eyes that had this soft, inviting quality to them if they were directed towards you.Then I started noticing his little half-smile where his lips would kick up to one side revealing this sweet dimple on his right cheek that made it difficult to swallow sometimes.There was also the way he would toss his head back every once in a while to move his thick, chocolate brown hair out of his face, and my fingers would twitch at my sides almost like they were holding back from reaching out to do it for him.And of course, there was his ass.His biteable, round ass that I had no business looking at, but consistently drove me to distraction the last few months when I would see him.

I don't know when the shift happened or what caused it specifically, but I couldn't deny that I no longer just saw Micah as my best friend. Now I saw him as…more. What that "more" was remained to be seen because it couldn't be in a romantic way.

I was straight and always had been. I never looked around the boys locker room during gym, or let my eyes drift in the showers after a football game. I had never once looked at another dude and thought he was hot beyond the thought that someone might be objectively good looking, but that was where those thoughts started and stopped. I had also never looked at Micah as anything but a friend and brother until this past year, and I couldn't figure out how that shit had changed.Us being together was also impossible where my dad was concerned. That would end horribly. Needless to say, I was fucking terrified.

I couldn't let those thoughts of him linger and spread because if they did? If I admitted that my feelings for Micah had grown past the constraints of platonic love? Well…I could lose him because there was no world in which we could be together in that way. That thought alone caused my stomach to knot and my chest to tighten painfully.

This was Micah.My Micah. The one who was talking the entire way to the party, blissfully unaware of the tumultuous thoughts running through my head like a high speed train headed for a fiery crash. Fuck, I need to get myself under control…

I tried to focus on what Micah was rambling on about and regather my errant thoughts as we rounded the street corner and came into view of the massive house where the sounds of thumping music could already be heard.

"Damn, Jonas and the boys really went all out for this one.Did they invite the whole ass campus?" Micah wondered aloud to me.He wasn't wrong.The house seemed so packed that there were people spilling onto the front lawn in various states of intoxication, and you could almost feel the bass of the music pounding in your chest the closer you got to the front door.

As we made our way inside, Micah looked around to see if any of his friends were nearby, but the foyer was so packed you could barely see into the interior of the house.The living room off to the right was jammed with people on the makeshift dance floor, bodies grinding together to the beat of the music.I'd be shocked if the oxygen levels in the room were in the acceptable range, seeing as how you could hardly move an inch or two in any direction.

We tried pushing past people to get to the kitchen at the back of the house, and I noticed quickly how many hungry looks Micah was getting from some guys around us.I knew how they were looking at him because the desire in their eyes matched my own when I looked at him now.The thought made my blood run hot and jealousy poured through my veins like acid, but the moment I recognized what that feeling was, I shut it down quickly and forced myself to ignore their looks. Shit. I am so screwed.

We finally made it into the cramped kitchen, and Micah yelled out so loudly it made me flinch. "JONAS!"

The raven haired, tattooed guy chatting up some curvy redhead turned to us after hearing Micah's shout.Jonas was a pretty chill dude, and I liked hanging out with him when I saw him on my visits to UNT.He had met Micah in one of their psychology courses, and they became fast friends.

It was strange to me that Micah thought of himself as this shy, weird guy that no one would care to notice when he made friends easier than he thought.Maybe it was college that brought it out in him, or perhaps it was me forcing him to go to parties and talk to other people, but he had really come out of his shell after high school. It made me so proud to see how much he"d grown these last couple of years.

Was there a part of me that was jealous he had other people in his life that he was close to besides me, especially who lived on the same campus as him? Maybe. But fuck if I was going to admit that to anyone but myself.I always knew our relationship bordered on an unhealthy attachment, but he was my closest friend, the person who knew me inside and out.I wasn't about to pull away from that just because others might not understand it or think it wasn"t right. Fuck. That. Noise.

Jonas shot us a lopsided grin, whispered something to the clearly tipsy redhead, and made his way over to us. "Yo, my dudes! You made it! Have you grabbed yourself something to drink?" he asked, already on the way to being truly smashed himself.

"Nah, we just got here, but we're about to do just that," I replied.

"Well, we've got it all so pick your poison! We've got vodka, tequila, rum, some fruity seltzer shit in the fridge, and of course there's a couple of kegs out back.One's got Shiner and the other is that flavorless Bud shit that Cam likes.Either way, take your pick!" Jonas motioned towards the kitchen counter that easily held about fifty bottles of alcohol and a tray of Jello shots that a couple of girls were congregating around.

I leaned into Micah and spoke into his ear so he could hear me. "I'll go grab us some drinks.Vodka Tonic still okay?" I asked him. Was it my imagination or did he shiver just now?

"Yeah, that's good!" he said, not quite making eye contact with me. Weird…

"Alright, be right back," I told him before making my way over to the counter. It was easier said than done because, holy hell, there were a lot of people here, but I finally made it and grabbed a couple of cups.I always teased Micah about his taste in drinks, often calling him an old lady or grandma for his preference of drinking Vodka or Gin Tonics.Secretly though, I thought it was cute. Wait, what the fuck? Did I just think that? A scary thought to be having seeing as how I hadn't had a drop of booze yet.

Just as I turned to get back to Micah after making the drinks, I felt a warm, delicate hand on my right bicep."Hey you, would you want to dance?" a flirty, breathy voice said next to me.I looked towards the voice and was met with a pair of bright blue eyes, frosty blond hair, and a tiny frame.In all honesty, the chick was hot and had I been at UT and not with…certain people, I'd probably entertain the idea, but right now I had zero interest in anything but hanging out with Micah.

"Sorry, I have someone to get back to," I told her gently.She pouted a bit, then smiled sweetly. "That's okay…if you change your mind, I'll be right over there." She pointed to the corner of the room where a few girls were talking and laughing. "I can definitely show you a good time," she said sultrily into my ear, winking at me as she left. I shook my head and looked back in the direction of Micah, only to come up empty. The fuck did he go?

I pushed a little further into the kitchen and then into the hallway, still not seeing him anywhere.When I made it back to the living room, I stopped dead in my tracks as I found Micah…and he wasn't alone.

Micah was plastered to the front of some jacked up dude who looked like a walking ad for Abercrombie.Seriously?That asshat wasn't Micah's type, and his hands were way too close to my friend's ass as they swayed to the beat.All I could hear was the blood pounding in my ears and my gaze was laser focused on douche canoe's hands as they traveled ever so slightly downward until they hit their intended target.Abercrombie dude then tugged Micah into him and moved his lips right next to Micah's ear.Whatever he said had Micah stiffening in his arms and attempting to push away.The guy just chuckled, said something else I couldn't make out, and then before I could even blink, he crushed his mouth to Micah's.

I. Saw. Red.

I don't know what possessed me to do what I did next, but I clearly wasn't in my right mind.I placed the cups of booze down on a side table, shoved my way through the crowd of sweaty bodies until I was right next to Micah and the douche nozzle, and gave him one massive push to get him away from my best friend. He was fucking mine. The guy stumbled back a bit, flustered and trying to get his bearings, and then he narrowed his eyes at me in fury."What the fuck do you think you're doing, jackass?" he snapped at me.

"I'm thinking it's time for you to find someone else to molest, shithead. He's not available." Why the fuck I said that, I have no idea because Micah was very much single and might have been into this guy for all I knew.However, I couldn't stomach that thought at the moment, and every nerve in my body was screaming at me to get this fucker away from him so I could…what exactly? Have him to myself? Goddamn it, I'm going to need that drink ASAP.

Micah grabbed my shoulder and pleaded with me, "Bash, it's okay. I'm not hurt, it's all good."That did nothing to calm the tension in my body until he said, "Look, it was nice to meet you Lex, but I'm not really interested. I'm sorry about him, he's just…protective."

Was he actually apologizing for me to this twat? The hell is that all about?

Fortunately, douche canoe (or "Lex" apparently) got the message fast and sneered, "Yeah, whatever," before making his way off the dance floor and disappearing from sight. I wheeled around to face Micah, anger still coursing through my blood. "What the hell was that, M?" I accused, and that was clearly the wrong fucking thing to ask.

"What the fuck do you mean ‘what was that'? I was dancing with a guy who was nice enough to ask me while you were trolling for a hookup.Didn't take you long, did it?" Micah growled.I was stunned. What did he mean trolling for a hookup? He should know that I would never do that while I was here to see him. He's the one I cared about spending time with, not some desperate sorority chick who was looking for a quick lay.But then..why would he care? He almost sounded…jealous.

"M, I wasn't trolling for anything. Where the hell did you get that crazy ass idea? I just went to get our drinks and in the five minutes I was gone, you're the one who managed to find some dick to drag you away from me."

"Uh, then who was the blond chick who was hanging off you and whispering in your ear? Look, if you want to get some action with her, I can't stop you, but don't come over here accusing me of something when I did nothing wrong," he hurled at me.His words stopped me in my tracks because I knew now what he thought. He saw that girl flirting with me and assumed that I was going to ditch him for her. It must have been why he said yes to douc…Lex…when he asked him to dance.

I softened my expression and looked him dead in the eyes. "I'm sorry, MM. You're right, you did nothing wrong.I'm not sure why I freaked out before.I guess I'm just used to monopolizing your time while I'm here and got all butt-hurt when I saw you with that guy," I said apologetically.I hoped that seemed like a legitimate reason for overreacting the way I did. If he guessed the real reason for my outburst was intense jealousy, then this could become bad really quick.

Micah eyed me with a questioning look, and then seemed to accept what I was saying."It's okay, BB. I forgive you. Do you want to try to go hunt down that girl again, or do you have it in you to dance with your bestie?" he asked timidly. I breathed a sigh of relief that our little tiff was over, but I had to set the record straight.

"M, I had no intention at all of going anywhere with that girl.She randomly came up to me and I told her I had someone waiting on me. I'd much rather dance with my MM," I told him earnestly.Micah's eyes shined with happiness and his lips ticked up in that cute half-smile of his that I was fast becoming addicted to. Aaaand that's my cue for a drink!

"Let me go grab fresh drinks for us real fast, and I'll be right back. Don't go anywhere!" I told him firmly, chuckling as I said it.Micah snickered in return, saying he would be right there waiting. All I could think was either the alcohol would dull my mind enough that I could forget my wayward thoughts about my best friend…or it would cause me problems that I wasn't prepared to handle.