55. Ree

55

Ree

The shock of the day is waning, leaving exhaustion in its wake, but I keep myself propped up.

I killed someone. I let Silver go.

Both decisions were warranted in the moment, but they weigh on me. Luckily genali rations are gross enough to help shift my mind away from the remnant guilt and horror.

Just that little bit of space is enough for my brain to compartmentalize the experience, as I've trained it to do. It's an enormous relief, and it lets me turn my mind to far more important things.

Like, despite the danger and straight up surrealism of even being here, how happy I am.

And it's not just because of Thivoll, though of course that is most of it, but also how peaceful it is on this planet. If we could just remove the hunters from the equation, this would be a paradise.

Not that there aren't beautiful places on Earth, but I don't want them.

I wouldn't trade being home and safe for just how alive and cherished I've felt in my short time with Thivoll. I would go anywhere with him, but why not here? I haven't missed technology.

Or the oppressive expectations of culture.

Okay. I miss warm food. And human companionship. And probably lots of other things I'm ignoring right now in the moment's glow.

Those could be built here. There's just the slight problem of a bunch of sadistic aliens who think this is their blood-soaked playground.

I might not be able to get my own claws dirty making sure the blood on the ground turns into their own, but I know I can support others as they do it.

I'll start with supporting Thivoll. And then maybe Szhe'ka, Kuret, and others.

That reminds me we need to visit the clearing and ridgeline they said they'd return to. I'll be sure to mention it to Thivoll on our next run.

I stay alert during all my musing and so I see Thivoll as he scales the cliff. I'm relieved I don't have to shoot anybody.

It only takes him a few moments to get to me and I move to make room for him. I'm also thrilled to no longer be so close to the ledge.

"Do you have her?"

"Yes. Let's get her up. But I want you to stay up here this time."

I bite down on my tongue, something in me wanting to tear into him even though it is completely reasonable.

My aggression is what isn't reasonable.

It's something I'm still not accustomed to and assume it must be part of the genetic changes.

I nod. I know why he is feeling protective right now and being reactive to it isn't helpful.

I simply show him how to tie the knot, check the rope after he throws each end down, and then lay down so my head can peek over the ledge with less surging panic about the height.

It's a far more nerve-wracking experience to watch him this time, but he must have perfected his technique last time because it seems like he flies up the cliff face.

He moves Amethyst into the small chamber and my heart aches to see her in Silver's place. I hope the woman is okay. That the male is treating her like my Thivoll treats me.

My Thivoll. My lips twitch at how his idiosyncratic language is rubbing off on me.

I place a blanket over her to give her privacy, then gain her even more by using the hooks at the top of the opening to create a fabric door.

She isn't conscious, but it feels respectful.

Before we go out again, I'll figure out how to write her a note in case she comes out of cryo while we're gone.

Thivoll has replaced and fluffed up our bedding while I worked and beckons me over to it. I watch him as he settles in.

All those things about him that initially made him so strange and even frightening are just a part of what make him mine.

"Are you satisfied now, my Ree? I have plans."

I look him up and down. His long orange mane is puffed out, as usual. His tail is tapping impatiently on my leg and his hooded look is promising me all kinds of naughty things.

I still feel that spike of aggression and taking on my usual submissive role just doesn't appeal tonight.

"No, I'm not satisfied. But how about I tell you exactly what you can do to change that?"

By his surging purr I know he likes the idea.

I hope he'll like my plan, but I don't let any insecurities rise, quashing them with this newfound presence in my chest prompting action.

"Get in bed and lay on your back."

His tail dances behind him as he pads over to our pile of bedding, then he plops down on his side before rolling over onto his back, his large haunches and backward facing legs forcing him into a wide sprawl.

I stalk over to him, stepping one leg over his belly so I'm standing directly over the expanse of black scales of his belly and the slit of his sheath. I order my nanothread to recede and his eyes roam over me.

I move farther back and lower myself so I'm sitting half a foot down from his sheathe.

"Bring it out for me, Thivoll."

His whiskers droop, letting me know he's confused, but he does what I ask. My eyes widen when I see his massive violet dick.

It should never have fit inside my body, but it did. More than once.

I have to modify my idea to give him oral sex, but it's still doable. From his confusion, I'm guessing he's never had it done and so he'll never know I had to scale back.

The idea of being his first is exciting.

I start off by reaching forward and grabbing him near his base with one hand. It can't circle all the way around, so I add another. He's slick and a cooler temperature than I expect. I pull both hands up in a slow glide toward his tip.

The move elicits a low groan.

His tip is rough in texture, similar to his tongue, plus ribbing along the length, and now I know why him grinding into me felt so damn good.

I explore him with my hands for a few more moments, then am delighted when just that bit of stimulation makes pre-cum leak from his twitching tip.

I'm curious what he tastes like and lean forward, flicking my tongue on his tip and causing him to take in a gasping breath.

He's tart and spicy.

Not a combination I would've thought I liked, but it leaves me wanting more.

His eyes are wide, watching me raptly as I move my mouth closer to him.

I keep my eyes locked on his as I open my mouth as wide as I can and take him into my mouth.