2. Thivoll

2

Thivoll

I always forget just how peaceful it is out here in the dark.

No shift change announcements, none of the usual hissing, popping, and clanging that comes along with being an air technician. Just the gentle thrum of the engine as it propels me out to fix a broken satellite.

It isn't my post, but Shaltann just delivered her first kit and it's an easy enough fix that anyone handy can take care of it.

I let my muzzle settle down on the padded headrest and my hands and paws dangle from where the long bench supports my chest and belly. I'm normally in constant motion, but I must admit the forced stillness is nice.

Though it's only a welcome reprieve if it doesn't last very long or my limbs will twitch and my tail dance with the need to expend energy.

For now, I close my eyes and enjoy the rare silence.

It's interrupted a few short moments later with the rumble of an incoming call. I let out a growl and crack open one eye. As much as I'd like to go back to basking in the silence, there's no ignoring it without losing parts of my scaled hide next time she sees me.

"Accept."

Instead of her usual luminous eyes and dainty features, I see the side of her head. She has one rounded ear swiveled toward me and the other oriented the way she is facing. Her short fur is as immaculate and glimmering as always, but her movements betray her agitation. Her scaled hands flutter around her neck, the two thumbs of one of them twitching, like she's trying to grasp at something unseen.

I've rarely witnessed my dam in such a state and my breath comes faster.

"What's wrong?"

She turns toward me, a muffled vidfeed in the background the only sound between us. From the drone of the voice, I assume it's a newscast.

She was never one for mincing words. "The slimes took more women. Do you remember Veentann? Her entire research team is gone."

The fur on my neck rises. Veentann is the smartest person I've ever met and should have been better protected instead of wasting away in captivity.

"There were no males?"

"There was only one. He was found with a few dead genali around him. He didn't survive."

"Venom bliss?"

"No. He was an Abstainer."

My long tail wraps around me at the mere mention of the sect, though I stop just short of hugging the tip to me like I did when I first learned about their beliefs.

They remove the end of the tail, which includes the venom delivery system, from their male kits at birth. The goal is to take away the temptation along with a male's most formidable weapon.

For every male outside their sect, it is our worst nightmare.

I wonder how many of the Abstainer kits internally rage at the disfigurement. Though of course no one would dare call it that.

Even those who disagree.

"Have you been taking the extra supplements I sent you?"

The change in subject gives me mental whiplash and I blink several times to clear my thoughts. I'm also not thrilled with the topic choice, although it shouldn't surprise me.

She lets out a displeased mew. "Your mane is looking darker than usual."

I'm quite certain my mane is the same fiery orange it has always been, but I know she's trying to take her mind off the pressing fear of the genali threat by focusing on her only kit.

Though I've long since grown past the need for hovering.

"Greetings to you as well, my dam," I tell her, ignoring her question and needling her about her notorious lack of social niceties by returning to what she left out of the very beginning of our conversation.

She narrows her golden eyes at me, leaving two small gold and orange slits and despite the distance between us I shiver at the implied threat.

She might be half my size, but no one would ever underestimate her.

"Let me see your claws."

I suppress a growl, but hold up my hands. I extend my claws, making sure she has a good view of both sets of black thumb claws by pivoting my wrists, and then I retract them again.

My superiors frown upon random scratches left on equipment and so it's best to keep them tucked away.

I wiggle all eight of my long fingers in front of my face while pushing my whiskers forward, since I can't help myself from returning to the habits of my youth.

She hums, ignoring my juvenile attempt to get a rise out of her. "What about your paws?"

I've had enough of humoring her. I'm certain she has enough information that she won't use back channels to access my medical records.

Somewhat certain.

I sigh. She already put it on her mental list for the day, I'm sure.

There's no rancor in my mind, however. Considering how many long cycles she spent waiting to find out if my sire was still alive, just to have her worst fears confirmed, I can't blame her for worrying.

"I'm perfectly healthy."

The old guilt tries to resurface and I remind myself that I couldn't have stayed planet-side. It would've been a slow death to not be moving toward something new. Though I admit I've made little progress in my goal to see more of the universe since taking my station post.

It might have something to do with this being a compromise between what I want and what will cause her the least amount of pain.

She growls at me, but there's no bite promised in it. "Are you on the station?"

"No, I'm in a small vessel headed to make repairs."

"With slime in the system? I need to talk to your station lead."

"I'm sure there's a patrol around."

She huffs out her disbelief. "As if the Thorisian Sentinels have enough resources to patrol that far."

"Well, people like me should join so they do."

It's a common argument for us and her fur stands on end. "Absolutely not, Thiv. You owe me at least another fifty years of being safe and boring for the first fifty you put me through as a kit. These last forty haven't been nearly enough to heal the emotional scars left from random disappearances and near drownings."

My whiskers push forward at the memories her chiding provokes. "Every adventure was worth it."

Her whiskers twitch. "For you, possibly. For me? Why was I stuck with the oddest kit to grace the pride?"

I puff out my long mane in mock outrage. "I am an altogether normal male."

After a moment of holding the expression, we both break out in chuffing. Hers has a manic edge to it infused with her disbelief.

As usual, I own up to nothing.

She huffs out a breath and the weight of recent events shows on her face again. It strikes me that for the first time I can see signs of aging. The light purple around her muzzle isn't as vibrant as it once was and more of her black scales than normal show through her short orange and green fur.

I don't want to stress her further, but reality is harsh these days. "I understand your wishes, my dam, but at some point we'll have to defend ourselves. That means people like me need to do more than clean vents."

She slumps. "I know, Thivoll. I just don't want you to get hurt."

My jaw drops open, and for a moment no response comes to me. There must be more going on than she shared. I've been discussing joining since I was a young kit of thirty, but it always felt like that one step too far to push my harried dam.

I take in a breath but a proximity warning interrupts my response. I freeze when I see it. There's a weight in my chest and my limbs shake as I work through what's about to happen.

I almost tell her, then take the coward's way out.

"I'll have to return your call after my shift."

She hums in agreement. "Be safe," she orders me as the display fades.

If she only knew. "Call central command."

After an indicator boop, the call is connected.

"Central."

"A genali cruiser is inbound to my location."

"Notifying Sentinels. Standby for instructions."

I tune them out. Nothing they can do will help. The only protection would be fully funded Sentinels, which we won't have until they stop endlessly debating it in Session.

Abstainers are a formidable presence and their fear of males devolving into raving, venom-addicted beasts is greater than the genali threat.

In their view it is better to mutilate kits and ignore the abduction of women than return to our ancient empire seeking days.

Most of us don't agree with them, not fully, but few have effectively taken on our most vocal minority.

At least not until recently.

Reports that nearly half of our female population is dead or missing has caused a backlash, but not soon enough to protect me.

Or Veentann and the many women like her.

My mouth tastes sour and my heart pounds. We always think we'll have so much time and leave so much undone and unsaid. After a moment's hesitation, I open another call with my dam. She looks surprised when she answers.

I waste no time in voicing what needs to be admitted. "I was a terror, and I deserved every punishment."

Her whiskers droop. "You're scaring me, Thiv. You've never admitted that."

"You were the best dam anyone could ever ask for and I wish my sire could see how beautiful you are after all these years."

Her muzzle is pale, and her fur is quaking. "The slimes . . ."

She can't finish so I do it for her. "There was a proximity alarm. No one is in range to help."

The sound of them locking on to the hull joins her outraged, heartbroken roar. It only takes a few moments for them to cut through the thin membrane and a canister to drop in. It pulls my eyes away from her. Why would they even attempt gas on our species?

But then I can feel it taking effect.

I turn back to her precious face. It's a good view before death. She is stoic now, her usual impressive emotional control in place.

"I've always been proud. You never conformed and I wish I let you follow your sire's path into the Sentinels."

I can't leave her with that regret. "I did what I wanted, and this was it. Tell someone the slimes made a new . . . compound."

I'm struggling to stay awake. "I love you," I say as my eyes drift closed.

Her responding roar fades to static as I succumb to the darkness.