Chapter 24

What the fuck was he thinking? He just told himself spending time away from Renee was the smart move. Then he invited her to go out with him and Nessa.

He planned to go out without her, but when she stared at him all thirsty and flirty, how could he not flirt back? No matter what she said, Renee was as into him as he was into her.

In that moment, he had a couple of realizations. One, she was scared. And two, he wanted Renee more than he wanted things to be easy. He just had to prove to her he was worth the risk. He had no idea what that should look like, how to make it happen, or even if it was the right move. But he wanted it. Wanted her.

He followed her to the car, and they drove to the bar Nessa suggested. When he parked and came around the other side of the car, he reached for Renee's hand. She took his hesitantly.

"What are we doing?"

"Going out for dinner and drinks with my little sister. Be warned. Nessa is an acquired taste."

She tugged his hand. "You know I mean this."

"I thought I was pretty clear. I know you're worried about Sadie. For now, Sadie doesn't have to know anything. This can just be for us. Once you're sure about me, then we can figure the rest out." He pulled her close. "We're not done with this. I know you feel it, too."

She paused and stared at him. "You want to carry on a secret affair with me?"

"Not secret from everyone. Unless that's what you want. Just from Sadie."

"She's a smart kid."

"I'm pretty sure I can fool a five-year-old."

"That would mean no kissing and touching when she's around. No flirty comments."

"I can control myself. Can you?"

"I'm a mom. My whole life is built on self-control."

"Then we have nothing to worry about." He smiled and pulled her toward the bar, afraid that if given the chance, she'd come up with more excuses. Right now, he'd won. He planned to keep it that way.

Inside the bar, a band was setting up in one corner. He hoped Nessa hadn't chosen a place with a metal band playing. He couldn't imagine Renee sitting through that. He scanned the bar and walked toward the back to see if Nessa was there.

Of course, she wasn't. He should've known; his sister was always late. "Let's grab a table."

He moved to the farthest section from the band just in case. Then he texted Nessa to let her know. They sat at a high-top table and a server came by and set menus down.

"Can I get you something to start?"

"Wine?" he asked Renee.

She shook her head. "I'll stick with a beer."

"Make it three. My sister will be here soon." The server left and he glanced at the menu. "I'm not real hungry. You fed us a huge lunch."

"You were working all day. I've seen you eat, and given the size of your brothers, I didn't want to risk not having enough food."

"You cooked like you were feeding my entire family. It wasn't even half of us."

"I don't know how I can ever thank you and your brothers for that."

"Seeing Sadie having fun in her own yard is all I'm hoping for." He glanced down at the menu again. "Want to get some appetizers to share?"

"Sure. Whatever you want."

He looked up at her. "What I want isn't on the menu."

She bit her lip and ducked her head, her cheeks growing pink. But she glanced up from under her lashes. So fucking hot.

A moment later, someone crashed into his shoulder. Nessa.

"What's up?" she screamed in his ear.

"Hey." He rolled his eyes. "Nessa, this is Renee. Renee, my charming sister."

"Fuck you. I am charming. What's with the sarcasm?" Turning to Renee, she said, "Tyler's sister, right?"

Renee nodded.

"I like Tyler. When he's not acting like he's too cool for everyone. Is he coming tonight?"

"Not that I know of," Renee said, looking at him.

"Uh-uh." He stood and shifted over a chair to let Nessa have his. "I already ordered you a beer. Renee and I plan to have some appetizers."

"Sounds good. Let's get a crap ton and share."

The server stopped by, set three bottles of beer down, and took their order. Nessa ordered a full ton of food.

"Did you not eat today?"

She shot him a dirty look. "Didn't Mom ever tell you it's rude to question a woman's eating habits?"

"You're not a woman. You're my sister."

Renee snorted. "She's right. Don't be a dick."

He was beginning to question his sanity for putting his sister at the same table with a woman he wanted to sleep with.

"I wasn't trying to be a dick. It's a lot of food." Pointing to the other side of the bar, he asked, "Do you know what kind of band is playing?"

"Nope."

He wasn't sure he believed her.

Nessa took a drink of beer and studied Renee. "So, Renee, are you using my brother for his tools or his body?"

Renee paused with her beer at her lips.

"What the fuck," he muttered.

Renee set her bottle down. "Your brother and I have an agreement. He's living rent-free in my house in exchange for doing some work I need done. I don't think that qualifies as using him."

"Ah, so it's his body," she said with a wink.

Renee's mouth lifted in a half-smile. "Again, if we have an understanding and we both benefit, does it count as using?"

Nessa barked out a laugh. "I like her."

Renee took a drink.

Declan leaned over. "I'm sorry my sister is being a bitch. It normally takes a few beers for that to start."

"I'm not being a bitch. I'm testing the waters. It's my duty as your sister. If she couldn't handle a little poking from just me, how the hell would she handle being around all of us?"

"So this is a test?" Renee asked. "Respectable."

He stared at her. "What?"

She shrugged. "I get it. If Ty was with some woman I wasn't sure about, I'd want to poke around, too. What if he got in deep and she was bad for him?"

"Women are too fucking weird."

Nessa shoved his shoulder. "Are you kidding? I've seen you stalk my boyfriends to check them out."

"Not since you were a kid."

"What do you do for a living, Nessa?" Renee asked.

"I'm a bartender mostly. Still figuring out what I want to be when I grow up. Kind of like this one." She bumped his shoulder again.

He clenched his jaw. It shouldn't irk him that everyone—including his family—thought he was a loser who had no plan for his life. He still didn't have much of a plan, but he was getting there. And it wasn't like he'd been a bum who never worked.

"I'm skilled labor."

"Bartending is a skill," she said.

He snorted. The server delivered their food. All of the plates barely fit on the small square table.

"What do you do, Renee?"

"I'm an accountant."

"Ouch. That sounds boring."

"Watch it, Nessie," he warned.

"Don't call me that." Turning to Renee, she said, "When I was in middle school, he used to call me Nessie, like the Loch Ness Monster."

"You're terrible," Renee said. "And what is it about you and messing with names?" She looked at Nessa. "When he wants to get under my skin, he calls me Rennie."

Nessa smacked his arm. "You're the worst."

"Anyway," Renee cut it. "My job can be boring. But when I'm working as a forensic accountant, it's more interesting. It's like digging through a puzzle to find the missing pieces."

Nessa bit into a hot wing and said, "Dude, you're in trouble. She's too smart for you."

Renee excused herself to go to the bathroom.

As soon as she was gone, he said, "What's wrong with you?"

"What?" Nessa asked, sauce all over her fingers.

"Are you trying to scare her off?"

"No. I'm having fun. It's what we do." She looked genuinely confused.

He took a deep breath and then finished his beer. He waved their server over to order another round.

"Oh my god. You like her like her."

"Why else would I be with her? Although right now, she might question why I would expose her to you if I like her."

"No, I mean like you're into her deep. I thought you guys were just having some fun. A little fling with the lonely housewife kind of thing."

"This is getting worse."

"You know what I mean. You're gone for her. I had no idea." She smacked his arm again. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I wasn't sure I could convince her we should try for more than a quick weekend. I do really like her, but it's complicated because of Sadie."

"That makes it complicated for her."

"Me, too. I wouldn't want Sadie to get hurt. She already has an asshole for a dad. Not that she knows it yet. But one day she will. I don't want her to think of me like that." Saying his fears out loud to his sister didn't feel good.

Their fresh beers were delivered and he took a long drink.

"So don't fuck it up. Decide if Renee is the real thing for you and if not, cut her loose. If she is, go all in. I don't think there's another way with a mom. That's why we never knew our mom had anyone." Nessa grabbed another wing and bit into it.

Renee returned and took her seat. Looking at the new bottle of beer, she said, "I'm not sure I'm ready for another."

She picked up a slider, added ketchup to the burger, and bit in. "Did I pass?"

"Fuck yeah, you did," Nessa said. "You'll keep him on his toes." She leaned across the table toward Renee. "In case you didn't know, the Doyles are a handful."

Renee laughed and he enjoyed the look on her face so much it didn't even bother him that he was the butt of his sister's jokes.

The rest of dinner, they talked about nothing and everything. Renee talked about her job before she had Sadie and how much it skewed her view of marriage and divorce. Nessa kept them in stitches telling stories about the bar and all the bad dates she'd witnessed.

The band started playing and it turned out they were some kind of cover band, but they didn't seem to have a theme or genre. They were all over the place playing everything from the Stones to Brittany Spears. But he didn't care because he was able to sit next to Renee and watch her unwind.

She looked as relaxed as she had at the wedding, which was not how she appeared most days. He wondered if there was a way for her have more time like this. When the food was gone, Declan suggested one more round.

Renee yawned. "I don't think I'm up for staying out late again. I can call a car and leave mine for you."

"Hell, no," he said. "We can leave."

"Aww," Nessa said.

"You can stay and hang out with your sister. I don't want to ruin your night. I should've stayed at home. I just didn't think I was going to be this tired."

"I'll take you home."

Renee opened her mouth to argue again, but Nessa cut her off. "Dude. He wants to be with you. When you've got a guy willing to walk out on a fun night of drinking to be with you, take it."

Renee smiled. "Fine. If you're sure."

"I am."

"Nessa, it was nice to meet you. I think I've met like half your family now, but I don't know if I'll remember all their names."

"I'm easy to remember because I'm the most fun."

"Or maybe it's because you're the only girl," he said.

Nessa rolled her eyes.

"You're good?" he asked.

"Yeah. I'll head out, too. This music isn't doing it for me."

They stood and Nessa threw her arms around him. Quietly, she said, "I like her. Hope you don't fuck it up."

"Real inspiring. Thanks."

He took Renee's hand as they walked to the car.

Renee tried to ignore the warm flush she felt every time Declan touched her. It was just some innocent hand-holding, but her body acted like it was more.

"Thanks for inviting me out."

"I like spending time with you." He unlocked the car.

"You're okay to drive?"

"Yes. I'm fine." He opened her door and she got in. When he got behind the wheel, he asked, "So Nessa didn't totally scare you off?"

"I like her. She's a lot of fun. She might've been right in saying she's the most fun sibling."

Declan sucked in a sharp breath. "But not more fun than me."

"I don't know. She was pretty funny."

"Take it back." He reached over and pinched her thigh. It wasn't hard, but it was enough to make her squirm. It was definitely flirty.

Her head was spinning and it wasn't from the beer she drank. She had no idea what she was doing with Declan. Giving herself a weekend with him had made sense. Declan was not a settling-down kind of guy. He'd been clear about not wanting to be a father. But she shouldn't be thinking about settling down either. She'd already survived one marriage and wasn't looking for another.

How did other single moms do this? She had no idea how to have a life separate from her daughter.

"Everything okay?" Declan asked with a hand on her thigh.

He did that a lot. Casual touches. She must've been starved for physical contact because she wanted to keep his hand there always.

"Yeah. I'm just thinking."

"About?"

"This. Us." She huffed. "I'm probably making this more complicated than it needs to be. "But this is new. Dating or whatever when I have Sadie."

"We take it at your pace. Don't overthink it."

He was right. She was overthinking. But she'd spent years in a relationship that required her to overthink. She sighed again and stared out the window as Declan drove them home. Home. She wouldn't have any other guy she was dating living in her home.

They could probably keep it a secret from Sadie. It wasn't like Sadie knew anything about dating or sex. She was five. And she knew Declan and liked him, so she was safe. It wasn't like Renee was introducing some stranger into their lives.

When Declan parked, she had convinced herself to do what she wanted. It was easier than usual to talk herself into doing something.

She opened her door to get out and he was already on her side of the car.

"So what did you come up with?" he asked.

"What do you mean?"

He took her hand again as they headed to the front door. "I could almost hear the conversation you were having with yourself about us."

"Oh."

"Well?"

"I think I want to keep doing this. I'm having fun and the sex...whew."

He chuckled as he opened the door.

"But Sadie can't know. That part is too complicated. Neither of us is looking for something serious and I won't have Sadie getting confused about the people in her life."

He bit the corner of his lip and nodded. "Okay."

"Yeah?"

He locked the door and reached for her. "Yeah. Does that mean I can fuck you again? Because I've been dying to get you naked."

She smiled. "Yes, please."

"Very polite." He kissed her with his hands on her hips, anchoring her to him. He began walking her across the room. "Let's see what we can do about that."

He turned them toward her room, but she stopped. She suddenly realized this would be the first time she had sex in this house. Her house. But going to her bed felt weird. Serious. "Let's go to your room."

He dipped his lips to hers again. "Wherever you want."

She turned and pulled him through the dark house, only the moon lighting their path. She really hoped Sadie didn't leave any toys on the floor. Stepping on a Lego might ruin the mood.

In his bedroom, Declan pulled her to him again and kissed her. "You sure about this?" he asked against her lips.

"Yeah."

"Because it'll kill me if we start this again and then you tell me I can't have you."

"I'm not that special Declan. If this ends between us, you'll survive." In the back of her head, the word if echoed. Shouldn't it have been when? Because this wasn't supposed to be serious.

His response was a low rumble against her neck. He licked and nuzzled her and she had a hard time catching her breath. He pulled her shirt up and his fingers grazed over her abdomen and up to her breasts.

She pulled away. "Too many clothes."

Pulling her shirt over her head, she walked backward toward the bed. She kicked off her shoes and shimmied out of her pants. "What are you waiting for?"

He smiled. "I like watching you strip for me. Plus, I don't need to be naked for what I'm starting with."

His gaze raked over her body and she shivered. He nudged her onto the bed and stroked her thighs. His heated gaze stayed on her while he peeled her underwear away.

Renee opened her eyes and squinted at the sunlight streaming through the window. The glow wasn't too bright, so it was still early. She glanced over her shoulder at Declan who snored quietly. He slept on his side, his hand possessively on her hip. Nothing about this felt casual. Having sex with him in her house. Spending the night in his bed.

But Sadie wasn't home. That was the deal they made. But was that practical? At best, she had two weekends a month free. Realistically, it was usually one weekend. And if Graham caught a whiff of her having a good time, he'd probably find more excuses to not take his weekends.

She sighed. She couldn't get used to this. That's all it meant. She could enjoy her time with Declan until he came to his senses and realized a ready-made family was too much. It was sweet that he'd said he was going to prove to her he wasn't going anywhere. But he didn't know what that actually meant.

Shifting quietly, she slipped out from under his hand. Step one of not getting too attached would be not spending the night with him. She stood and gathered her clothes from the floor and went back to her room. It was a little after seven, so she debated going back to bed. She had things to do, but sleeping in sounded so good. She pulled on a sleepshirt and crawled under her covers. The cool sheets reminded her of the warmth she left in the other room. But it was for the best.

At least that was what she told herself.